Alex and Rob cast an irreverent eye over local news from their respective home towns.

Listeners can submit stories from their local area to:[email protected]

Stories this week include:

• New fashionable dead mouse cocktail hits Shoreditch.
• Door-to-door brick saleman outraged by malicious allegations.
• Supermarket chain agrees lucrative mineral water deal with local pond.
• Drunken man cooks pants after mistaking wardrobe for fridge.

Also revealed: The romance comes to an abrupt end.