Stories this week include:

• Saviour of poultry returns from the dead in Cornwall.
• Man with vendetta launches campaign to rid Gloucester of all pet felines.
• Factory worker engages in stand-off with armed police after mother revokes television privileges.
• Offensive Christmas decoration is this year's must have for Yewtree.

Also revealed: We wish all our listeners a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year...now, how about a badly sung Christmas carol?