LAUGHING MATTERS Podcast

With Project 2025 looming and women continuing to be marginalized, Lisa interviews a violently heterosexual male (her partner, Tor Hyams) about the solution to the age-old quandary of feminism.

Well, in keeping up my perfect, weekly submission streak, I bring to you the podcast version of my “Tats & Tits” post. I know, I know, when I do this it is disappointing to some of you because you prefer the awesome, newly written entry about the terrible but funny things that happened to me in my past or recent life. But hang in…I’m just getting geared-up to go full-on memoir and have some fun interviews lined-up for future podcasts. The hustle is real y’all. ;-)

Happy 4th of July weekend!

In Laughter,

LStL

In honor of what would have been my grandma’s 100th birthday yesterday, I give you the audio version of my 4/16/2024 Substack post, “To RIP Or Not To RIP, That Is The Question”. She was the inspiration of that story and lives-on in the hearts of many. RIP Grandma Rice.

Hi, I’m Lisa St. Lou. I hope you’ve been enjoying Laughing Matters. While nearly all of my posts will be free to read and share, please consider upgrading to a paid subscription below if you are able. It’s a meaningful way to sustain my work as an independent writer, gets you a few subscribers-only perks, and help keep this space ad-free. I’m grateful for your time, trust, and support. - In Laugher, LStL

LAUGHING MATTERS is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Please and thank you!

Hello you beautiful humans!

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I am WAAAAAAY late in posting my usual memoir musings this week. Please let me bore you with the details as to why:  I am under a deadline for a revision of a play, we are in a visa hellscape with moving to France for a year and did I mention we are releasing a new album on 7/11? Yup. All that. Blah blah blah. Bored yet?

Buuuuuuuuuuuuuut…I am NOT leaving you hanging with nothing to hold onto from my Laughing Matters nook! I have recorded more podcasts from previous posts for your listening enjoyment and also, incase you missed them in written form. They will be made available on all the platforms instantaneously so check them out on Spotify, or Apple or even straight from Substack!

I will be back in writer action the week of June 10th so lookout for the next story in your inbox folx!

In Laughter,

LStL

I hope you’ve been enjoying Laughing Matters. While nearly all of my posts will be free to read and share, please consider upgrading to a paid subscription below if you are able. It’s a meaningful way to sustain my work as an independent writer, gets you a few subscribers-only perks, and help keep this space ad-free. I’m grateful for your time, trust, and support. - LStL

LAUGHING MATTERS is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming paid subscriber. Please and THANK YOU!

Last week I had the privilege and pleasure (accent on the last word there) of speaking with renowned sexologist and thought leader of intimacy and sexuality, Zoë Kors. I wish I could say I read her book when it came out two years ago, Radical Intimacy: Cultivate the Deeply Connected Relationships You Desire and Deserve (Hachette, 2022), but I didn’t. I tossed it in the pile of books that I intend to read before I die but deep down, I know I never will. And there it sat, atop Tears and Laughter by Khalil Gibran and The Joke by Milan Kundera. At least Zoë was in good company.

It wasn’t until I started seeing myself differently in the mirror…

Me: Oh hey. You look like shit.

My Reflection: No, YOU think you look like shit, but in reality, you look fucking great for your age.

Me: Fuck off.

My Reflection: You are what you think you are. And I think you are sexy.

Me: Well, I don’t think YOU are sexy.

My Reflection: Let’s agree to disagree.

…that I picked up her book to start finding some answers to what the next twenty-five years was going to be like for my brain and body and desire and all the things that make-up an intimate relationship with myself ANNNNNnnnnnnd my partner.

Zoë is a phenom. It’s like she was reading my mind and also, mentoring me on things that I didn’t know I needed to understand about sex in general and what sex can look like when we stop finding things sexy. (Take that for whatever that means to YOU.) When I finished the book, I just had to ask if she would do a podcast with me to touch upon a couple of the things that stuck out for me and those of us who might be trying to understand who we are when it feels like our bodies are betraying us. But really, isn’t that ALL of us??

Podcast Take-Aways:

1.) The Mind-Body Double Helix - Just like My Reflection said, “You are what you think you are.” But in Zoë’s words, “True healing and transformation happens through reorganizing and rewriting the ideas and stories we perpetuate about our sexuality, while simultaneously working with the Boyd to shift the way we experience sensation and pleasure.”

2.) On Sex & Aging - The necessity to resist the temptation to compare the way your body looks and functions to the way it did in the past and approach your body with respect and compassion. (I might add, a LOT of compassion.)

3.) Desire vs. Arousal - Desire is an urge or hunger for sex whereas, arousal is the physical manifestation of sexual response. The two can occur simultaneously, in any order, and sometimes independent of each other. And guess what, it’s fine if you don’t have either! You can still be sexual. (That one blew my mind.)

3.) Coconut Oil - It isn’t just for cooking. I’ll leave that there.

So, this week I share with ALL of you, this podcast with Zoë and I chatting, but most importantly, laughing, about all things SEX.

Enjoy.  I mean that. *wink

In Laughter,

LStL

p.s. I’m starting to release video versions of my podcasts on my YouTube channel. You can check this one out via video HERE !

p.p.s. You can find Zoë Kors HERE. She does group coachings, couples’ coachings, and individual coachings on overcoming obstacles with intimacy.

Disclaimer: This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional.

The journey to perimenopausal enlightenment began when I had a conversation about hair loss with my cousin, Dr. Karen Neubauer, a dermatologist from Kansas who has specialized in hair treatments among all the other things in life that go wrong with our dermis. (See Substack entry if curious.) Although we were talking about women’s hair loss and aging, she mentioned the 20+ year-old study about hormone replacement therapy (HRT) that has since been debunked and turned the hormone world on its head. Subsequently, my cousin turned me on to Dr. Mary Clare Haver and podcast princess, Mel Robbins. I had an “A-ha” moment about all of this shit and if you know me, once I know something, I just can’t un-know it and am driven to do something about it. And so began my quest to understand this mysterious and unbearable territory called peri, post and straight up menopause. It’s a world in which women live 30% of their lives (if they are lucky enough to hang on that long) and one that has been underfunded and in turn, underresearched and thus, overly ignored. Surprised? Neither was I. Especially since the Ozempic babies started popping out. I mean, they didn’t test this shit on women who were taking birth control before they started giving it out like candy on Halloween??

LAUGHING MATTERS is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Please & thank you!

The second I finished listening to their podcast I called my OBGYN and asked to have a consult about getting on hormone replacement therapy. I was determined to find some relief from the night sweats, the oh-so-extra migraines I’d been experiencing in the last year, the feeeeeeeeelings, the struggle with weight management and the lack of sleep. I had some mad expectations that I just knew were going to be met because it seemed that there was one simple solution: hormone replacement therapy. (Cue the gates of heaven opening up and a choir filled with 1000 Whitney Houston’s singing an anthemic “Ahhhhhhhh”).

I cried AT my doctor. Have you heard of hate-f*cking? Well, I was hate-crying.

The first question she asked me was, “Do you get auras with your migraines?” I said, “yes.” And then she said, “Then you are not a candidate for HRT. Women with migraines accompanied by auras run a higher risk of stroke.” The 1000 Whitney’s immediately stopped singing in my head and I began to cry. I cried at my doctor. Have you heard of hate-fucking? Well, I was hate-crying.

So, now I’m relegated to finding homeopathic solutions and figuring out how to suffer less through the last 30% of my life. I began reaching out to women and I know, and hopefully in the future women I don’t know, who are experts in their fields of dealing with the symptoms of aging in women.

Men, if you think this doesn’t pertain to you, you are wrong. Unless you have zero contact with any women in your entire life. And even if that is the case, some woman gave birth to you and has had to suffer through this. The least you could do to repay her kindness is listen to my podcast and forward it to someone you think might glean some knowledge or want to laugh through her pain.

Enter my friend Erin Boardman Wathen. She is a Holistic Weight Loss & Certified Life Coach, Food Addiction Counselor and author of “Why Can’t I Stick To My Diet”. When I called her about doing a podcast exploring the sides of aging and weight gain and what we can do to combat it other than intermittent fasting, she unveiled a wealth of knowledge and a glimmer of hope. If you don’t have time to listen to our banter and stories about growing up in the 80’s and how shame rolled itself into our psyche around all things body image, here are some takeaways that I just had to highlight:

ON FOOD AND FITNESS OVER 40:

* “You need to eat half as much and work out twice as much to look half as good.”

- E. Wathen

* Eat more protein.

* Do more strength training to combat osteoporosis.

* With regard to making healthy choices: “Would you cheat on your boyfriend? Then why are you cheating on yourself?” - E. Wathen

* Get to the why’s about habits. It’s an inside job. If you can figure out why you are eating this or that or not taking that walk or yoga class, then you can get to the bottom of the behavior and make the lasting change you are looking for.

* Stop playing the shame game when it comes to what you do to, and put in, your body. Every moment is an opportunity for a different choice.

Those are some biggies, but the real gems are in the laughter and banter between two women who lived in a duplex home in Greenwich, CT for two years while we were having babies and trying to become trophy wives and failing miserably…at the trophy wife part. I think our kids turned out pretty damn good.

In Laughter,

LStL

Disclaimer: This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. I, Lisa St. Lou, am not a licensed therapist, and this podcast is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist or other qualified professional.

Here it is folx! My most-read, most-loved Substack post is in podcast form! Enjoy!

In Laughter,

LStL

When my fiancé met my family for the first time. Good thing we were already engaged!

In Laughter,

LStL

To my wonderful paid subscribers…I present to you Episode #3 of the LAUGHING MATTERS podcast! You are getting the first look, or shall I say, listen. I try my best to get it out on Fridays but, let’s just say, you are keeping me on my toes and I am loving the challenge of expressing this weird and wonderful new creative voice that’s been unleashed in the Substack Universe!

Each podcast will be unlocked for the general public one week after YOU get the chance to take a listen, ‘cause you’re special. ;-)

As my loyal supporters, I would LOVE to hear what topics or subject matter you would like me to explore! Please reach out with any suggestions that peak your interest and I will do my best to weave them into my weekly musings, either on the page or on the mic!

Muah!

In Laughter,

LStL

Well, I promised this for Friday, but due to technical difficulties, it’s comin’ at you HOT on a Sunday instead. Better late than never.

My guest, Tor Hyams, and I discuss what to do if you ever find yourself in the slammer. Turns out, you got choices! Take a listen to hear what you may or may not have thought about when it comes to surviving on the “inside.” Spoiler alert, poop may or may not be someone’s plan. You’ll just have to listen to find out.

In Laughter,

LStL