Leadership Language

In this episode of the Leadership Language Podcast, I’m joined by Chalmers Brothers, bestselling author, executive coach, speaker, and co-author of Language and the Pursuit of Leadership Excellence, for a conversation about what actually changes when strong technical professionals move into leadership.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

If this is you, stop guessing at why.

I built the Executive Leap Diagnostic for IT Directors and VPs who keep getting passed over.

 A few minutes, completely private. 

It shows you what is holding you back, where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump, and the move that matters next.

For the right fit, it unlocks the Executive Leap Session. 45 minutes, one on one with me.

Apply - https://www.tingleleadership.com/

Technical and functional skills matter. In many organizations, they are the price of admission. But they are often not the capabilities that determine whether someone succeeds at the next level.

Chalmers breaks leadership down into five competencies: functional, technical, conversational, relational, and emotional. We explore why the last three are so often underdeveloped — even though they have an enormous impact on trust, accountability, culture, execution, and leadership effectiveness.

We also discuss why organizations are networks of conversations and commitments, how poor conversations create rework and missed outcomes, why moods influence action and results, and how leaders can separate events from the stories they create about those events.

Later in the conversation, we explore work-life balance as a polarity rather than a problem to solve, the danger of the “more” mindset, and why human capabilities such as listening, trust, relationships, reflection, and emotional awareness may become even more important as AI takes on more work.

Chalmers has spent decades working in leadership development, workplace culture, communication, emotional intelligence, accountability, and relationship-building. His books have been used in leadership and coaching programs at organizations including Georgetown University, NASA/Goddard Space Center, Harley-Davidson, and the Newfield Network.

If you’re a technology director, VP, CIO, CTO, or technical leader preparing for the next level, this conversation will challenge you to look beyond expertise and examine the conversations, relationships, emotions, and commitments that actually shape leadership results.

00:00 — Why conversations shape our relationships
03:53 — The five competencies of leadership
04:43 — Why technical skills are only the threshold
07:17 — Relationships, communication, and healthy politics
10:19 — The missing conversations inside organizations
12:42 — Why meetings and commitments break down
15:32 — The real cost of ineffective conversations
17:27 — How moods and emotions affect leadership results
21:06 — Moods are predispositions for action
24:24 — How leaders can intentionally shift their mood
26:06 — Event is not the same as explanation
28:44 — What parents can teach children about interpretation
32:13 — Work-life balance and the “more” trap
37:29 — Why human leadership matters even more with AI
41:30 — Leaders as conversational architects
43:17 — Advice for directors who want to become executives
45:08 — Authenticity, vulnerability, and leadership trust

In this episode of the Leadership Language Podcast, I’m joined by CIO and technology leader Patrick Adesso for a conversation about what AI is changing — not just in software development, but in technology leadership itself.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → ⁠https://www.tingleleadership.com/⁠ 

Patrick believes the next great technology leader may not be the strongest traditional technologist. They may be the person who can communicate, create, exercise judgment, understand the business, and orchestrate people and AI toward a clear outcome.

We talk about Patrick’s journey from aviation and software development to technology leadership, why he still writes and ships software himself, and why staying close to the work has helped him build trust with his teams and connect technology to real business outcomes.

Patrick also shares how AI changed the conversation inside his organization. Instead of trying to convince skeptical executives with presentations, he began showing them working prototypes and measurable business results — including a use case that produced significant savings.

We also get into one of the biggest shifts facing developers and technology leaders today: AI can dramatically accelerate coding, but that makes architecture, security, design, communication, creativity, and judgment even more important.

In this conversation, we cover:

• Why the next great tech leader may be a linguist, not a traditional technologist
• Why technology leaders need to think like business leaders
• How AI changes the economics of software development
• Why showing an AI prototype can beat explaining an AI strategy
• How to move from shadow AI toward intentional adoption
• Why architecture matters even more when AI writes code
• How Patrick uses AI as a thought partner before building
• Why developers are experiencing an identity shift
• The human skills developers will need to stay valuable
• Why creativity, taste, communication, and judgment become more important in the AI era
• How technology leaders can become orchestrators rather than operators

If you are a CIO, CTO, VP, director, technology leader, software leader, or technical professional thinking about what AI means for your career and leadership, this conversation will give you a very different way to think about what comes next.

In this episode of the Leadership Language Podcast, I’m joined by Tony Qualls, Regional CIO for AdventHealth’s Great Lakes region, for a conversation about what it really takes to grow from a strong technical contributor into a trusted technology executive.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → ⁠https://www.tingleleadership.com/⁠ 

Tony shares why IT often promotes highly capable engineers, technicians, and technical experts into leadership roles without giving them the same development, coaching, and business leadership preparation that other executives receive.

We talk about the shift from being seen as an IT leader to becoming a true business leader — someone who can build relationships, influence across the organization, communicate value, and develop the next generation of leaders.

Tony also shares lessons from his own leadership journey, including stepping into management in 1999, learning how to lead former peers, building trust through servant leadership, and discovering the importance of business language, budgeting, and relationship-building.

We also explore why human leadership skills matter even more in the AI era. As AI takes on more technical and operational work, technology leaders will need stronger communication, curiosity, emotional intelligence, influence, and executive presence.

In this conversation, we cover:

• Why IT keeps promoting unprepared leaders
• How technical experts can become business leaders
• Why influence matters more than authority
• How servant leadership builds trust
• Why relationships open doors for technology leaders
• How vulnerability creates a learning culture
• Why leadership development should be a standing agenda item
• How AI raises the value of human leadership skills
• Why every leader must start with their own growth
• The advice Tony would give his younger self: never give up

If you are a technology leader, IT director, VP, CIO, CTO, or technical expert preparing for the next level, this conversation will help you rethink leadership, influence, and the human skills that make executives successful.

Timestamps:

00:00 — Vulnerability and learning as a leader
00:56 — Meet Tony Quallis
01:53 — Why IT promotes unprepared leaders
04:32 — The cost of underdeveloped technology leaders
06:09 — Tony’s first IT management role
10:51 — Learning to speak the language of business
12:39 — From command and control to influence
14:02 — Why relationships matter for IT leaders
18:40 — Tony’s leadership thoughts
21:45 — Building a culture of intentional growth
25:51 — The leadership impact you may not see for years
29:42 — Why AI makes human leadership more important
34:52 — Start with your own growth
36:49 — Making time to learn as a busy leader
39:00 — Tony’s advice to his younger self
41:07 — Leadership books Tony recommends
43:16 — Closing thoughts with Tony
44:08 — Executive Leap diagnostic and final CTA

Every time you hear the words “you need more executive presence,” it can feel like someone is saying there’s something wrong with you.

In this episode, I’m breaking down one of the most vague and frustrating pieces of leadership feedback: executive presence.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

Most people treat executive presence like a personality trait — something you either have or you don’t. But that’s not true.

Executive presence is not charisma. It is not volume. It is not pretending to be someone else.

Executive presence is a set of observable behaviors you can practice and build.

I’ll share the story of a CIO candidate who had a strong track record, respected leadership, and consistent results — but was told by the board that he did not have the presence for the role yet.

Then I’ll show you the four behaviors we worked on that changed how he was perceived in executive rooms.

In this episode, I’ll cover:

• Why “you need more executive presence” is usually vague feedback
• Why executive presence is not a personality trait
• How to speak in outcomes instead of activity
• Why conviction matters more than volume
• How calm under pressure builds trust
• Why clear commitments make you sound more credible
• How to build executive presence one behavior at a time

If you’re a technology leader, CIO candidate, senior director, VP, or executive-track leader who has been told you need more executive presence, this episode gives you a concrete way to work on it.

You don’t need to become a different person. You need to build the behaviors that help people trust you in bigger rooms.

Subscribe for more leadership strategy, executive presence, and career growth advice for technology leaders.

Timestamps

00:00 — Executive presence is not a personality trait
00:16 — Why vague presence feedback feels personal
00:48 — The CIO candidate who lacked “presence”
01:07 — Executive presence is observable behavior
01:26 — Presence is what you do under pressure
01:42 — Why vague feedback damages leaders
02:02 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
02:37 — The four behaviors of executive presence
02:37 — Behavior 1: Speak in outcomes
02:52 — Behavior 2: Lead with conviction
03:27 — Behavior 3: Stay calm under pressure
03:44 — Behavior 4: Use commitments, not expectations
04:20 — How the four behaviors reinforce each other
04:38 — How one CIO candidate practiced presence
04:58 — Handling a board challenge calmly
05:30 — Using commitments to lead better meetings
05:47 — The board noticed the shift
06:05 — This week’s executive presence challenge
06:24 — Share this with a leader who needs it
06:39 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
07:13 — The strategic conversation that could change your life
07:29 — Stop waiting for your work to speak for itself
07:36 — Closing and next episode

Every time you feel stuck, you work harder. And that instinct may be the exact thing holding you back.

In this episode, I’m talking about one of the most common traps I see with technology leaders: responding to being overlooked by doubling down on execution.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

You stay later. You take on another project. You go deeper into the technical details. You become the person leadership calls when something breaks.

It feels responsible. It feels like proof.

But more output does not always answer the doubt that keeps you stuck. In many cases, it reinforces the same story leadership already has about you: strong operator, keep them where they are.

The next level does not require less effort. It requires different effort.

I’ll show you why hard work can become a hiding place, why execution feels safe, and how to redirect your energy toward the things that actually change promotion outcomes: visibility, business language, relationships, and sponsorship.

In this episode, I’ll cover:

• Why working harder can keep you stuck
• How execution becomes a shield
• Why more output does not always lead to promotion
• How to spend less time proving and more time positioning
• Why business language matters in executive rooms
• How sponsorship changes promotion outcomes
• How to redirect effort toward work that actually moves you up

If you’re a technology leader who keeps delivering, grinding, and proving yourself but still feels overlooked, this episode will help you see the real shift.

You’re not stuck because you’re not working hard enough. You’re stuck because work is the only lever you’ve been pulling.

Subscribe for more leadership strategy, executive presence, and career growth advice for technology leaders.

Timestamps

00:00 — Working harder may be holding you back
00:18 — Why overlooked leaders double down on effort
00:35 — The director who kept hearing “not ready yet”
00:52 — Hard work as a hiding place
01:07 — Why execution feels safe
01:23 — What actually gets leaders promoted
01:40 — More output reinforces the operator story
01:56 — Why grinding gives immediate proof
02:12 — The wrong lever problem
02:29 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
02:48 — Redirect effort, don’t reduce it
03:05 — Move 1: Spend less time proving, more time positioning
03:20 — Move 2: Translate work into business language
03:41 — Move 3: Build sponsorship
04:03 — Handing off work instead of taking more
04:22 — Choosing visible initiatives over hardest projects
04:39 — Sponsorship after 18 months of different effort
04:59 — Working differently, not harder
05:15 — This week’s calendar challenge
05:33 — Stop pulling only the work lever
05:49 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
06:26 — The strategic conversation that could change your life
06:45 — Closing and next episode

Many leaders look at office politics and think, “I don’t want to become that person.” So they stay out of it — and it quietly kills their career.

In this episode, I’m reframing what office politics actually means for technology leaders.

Politics does not have to mean lying, posturing, taking credit, or manipulating people. That is toxic politics — and you should stay far away from it.

But healthy politics is different.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

Healthy politics is relationships and trust applied at scale. It is understanding what people care about, making your work visible, building trust before you need something, finding sponsors, and giving credit loudly and often.

I’ll share the story of a director who had strong results, real integrity, and one of the most reliable teams in the company — but kept watching people he considered more political and less capable move ahead of him.

The breakthrough came when he realized he did not need to become someone else. He needed to become visible on his own terms.

In this episode, I’ll show you:

• Why avoiding office politics can hurt your career
• The difference between toxic politics and healthy politics
• Why relationships and trust shape promotion decisions
• How to build visibility without bragging
• Why sponsors matter more than mentors
• How giving credit builds political capital
• How to build influence without losing your integrity

If you’re a technology leader who delivers results but feels uncomfortable with politics, this episode will help you stop sitting on the sidelines and start building influence the right way.

You don’t have to become someone you’re not to be seen. But you do have to be seen.

Subscribe for more leadership strategy, executive presence, and career growth advice for technology leaders.

Timestamps

00:00 — “You’re valuable” may be the reason you’re stuck
00:15 — The person every company depends on
00:32 — Recognition can become containment
00:50 — The VP who wanted the CIO seat
01:05 — “We need you where you are”
01:26 — Executives promote leaders who make the building stand without them
01:47 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
02:04 — Operational value vs leadership readiness
02:20 — Move 1: Build a successor
02:35 — Move 2: Delegate the technical work
02:54 — Move 3: Change what you’re known for
03:13 — This week’s leadership challenge
03:30 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
04:03 — The strategic conversation that could change your life
04:19 — Stop waiting for your work to speak for itself
04:25 — Closing and next episode

Your boss keeps telling you how valuable you are. That may not be a compliment — it may be the reason you’re stuck.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

In this episode, I’m talking about one of the most common traps I see with technology leaders: becoming so indispensable in your current role that the organization cannot imagine moving you.

You become the person who knows the systems, solves the hardest problems, handles the fires, and keeps the business running. Leadership praises you for it.

They give you more scope, more responsibility, and more critical work.

But when the next role opens, they say: “Not yet. We need you where you are.”

That is the indispensable trap.

I’ll explain why being irreplaceable can become a cage, why executives don’t promote the person holding up the building, and why the real path to the next level is proving the building can stand without you.

In this episode, I’ll show you:

• Why being “too valuable” can block your promotion
• How operational value is different from leadership readiness
• Why making yourself irreplaceable creates a ceiling
• How to build a successor
• Why you need to delegate decisions, not just tasks
• How to change what you are known for
• Why leaders get promoted when they create capability beyond themselves

If you’re a technology leader who feels trusted, relied on, and still stuck, this episode will help you understand the shift you need to make.

You don’t get promoted for being needed where you are. You get promoted for proving you’re ready to be needed somewhere bigger.

Subscribe for more leadership strategy, executive presence, and career growth advice for technology leaders.

Timestamps

00:00 — “You’re valuable” may be the reason you’re stuck
00:15 — The person every company depends on
00:32 — Recognition can become containment
00:50 — The VP who wanted the CIO seat
01:05 — “We need you where you are”
01:26 — Executives promote leaders who make the building stand without them
01:47 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
02:04 — Operational value vs leadership readiness
02:20 — Move 1: Build a successor
02:35 — Move 2: Delegate the technical work
02:54 — Move 3: Change what you’re known for
03:13 — This week’s leadership challenge
03:30 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
04:03 — The strategic conversation that could change your life
04:19 — Stop waiting for your work to speak for itself
04:25 — Closing and next episode

You asked for budget to fix real technical debt and got a no. Then another department asked for the same money with softer numbers and got a yes.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

In this episode, I’m explaining why that happens — and why it is not random.

After years as a CIO and now coaching CIOs, VPs, and technology leaders, I’ve seen this pattern again and again: strong technical cases lose to weaker business cases because they are framed in the wrong language.

Executives do not fund technology. They fund revenue protection, risk reduction, and efficiency gains.

If you walk into a budget meeting talking about architecture, uptime, system stability, or technical debt, you may be telling the truth — but you are not speaking the language of the people who sign the checks.

I’ll show you how to reframe a technical request so it lands with the CFO, CEO, and board.

In this episode, I’ll cover:

• Why technical debt cases often get rejected
• Why marketing may win budget while technology loses it
• The three things executives listen for: revenue, risk, and efficiency
• How to replace technical severity with business exposure
• How to turn architecture problems into financial risk
• Why rough numbers beat vague warnings
• A three-sentence model for getting technical projects funded

If you’re a technology leader trying to get budget approved, stop pitching technical debt. Start showing what the investment protects, prevents, or produces.

That is the language that moves money.

Subscribe for more leadership strategy, executive presence, and career growth advice for technology leaders.

If you’ve ever been told to “be more strategic” and walked away wondering what that actually means, this episode is for you.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/ 

In this episode, I’ll show you:

• Why “be more strategic” is usually unclear feedback
• What executives actually mean when they say it
• Why technical updates often fail in executive rooms
• How to translate technical work into business outcomes
• Why senior leaders care about revenue, risk, cost, speed, and advantage
• How to stop leading with “what we did” and start leading with “so what”
• How strategic language changes how people see your leadership potential

If you’re a technology leader, senior director, VP, or technical executive who wants to be seen as more strategic, this episode gives you a concrete way to start.

Stop telling executives what you did. Start telling them what it was worth.

Timestamps

00:00 — The vague feedback: “Be more strategic”
00:18 — Why this feedback is so useless
00:34 — Welcome to Leadership Language
00:49 — What happens when you present to executives
01:27 — Why leaders say you need to be more strategic
01:46 — Speaking the wrong language for the room
02:03 — Performance review season and vague feedback
02:38 — Why nothing changes after the feedback
02:55 — What “strategic” actually means
03:28 — Stop telling executives what you did
03:48 — Operator language vs executive language
04:04 — Strategic is how you frame what you know
04:21 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
04:37 — Michael’s story: strong results, same feedback
05:14 — Michael’s communication gap
05:46 — Executives need to understand the business stakes
06:03 — The three-question filter for executive updates
06:21 — Before: technical update
06:47 — After: business-outcome update
07:03 — How Michael changed executive perception
07:24 — Same person, different language
07:42 — Lead with the “so what”
08:04 — Examples of strategic language
08:37 — Strategic thinking is a language shift
09:03 — How strategic framing changes your career
09:19 — Share this episode with someone who needs it
09:35 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
10:08 — Stop waiting for your work to speak for itself
10:20 — Closing and next episode

Your next promotion may already be getting decided in a meeting you were not invited to.

Most IT leaders who get passed over are not short on effort. They deliver, they lead, they put in the work.

The harder truth: the skills that made you the best operator are the same ones keeping you out of the executive seat. The business sees a technologist, not a leader. And no one ever explains how to change that.

That is the work I do. I help IT Directors and VPs make the jump to the executive level.

It starts with a short private diagnostic. It shows you which of the things holding you back is costing you the most, and where you stand against the leaders who already made the jump.

For the right fit, it opens into the Executive Leap Session:

• A private 45-minute session, one on one with me
• I read your full diagnostic before we talk
• A straight read on where you actually stand
• The one or two things holding you back, specific to you
• The move that matters next

45 minutes with a former CIO, normally something leaders pay for. Take the diagnostic and find out where you stand.

Take the diagnostic → https://www.tingleleadership.com/

In this episode, I’m talking about one of the most important career shifts for technology leaders: the difference between having a mentor and having a sponsor.

A mentor talks to you.
A sponsor talks about you when you’re not in the room.

That distinction matters because promotion decisions, talent reviews, succession planning, and executive conversations often happen behind closed doors. And when your name comes up, the question is not just whether you’re talented. The question is whether someone in that room knows you well enough to put their credibility behind you.

I’ll share the story of Jane, a Director of Technology who had strong results, strong respect, and real readiness for a VP role — but still kept getting passed over because the right senior leaders didn’t know her beyond her immediate manager.

Then I’ll show you how she built a real sponsor by becoming useful to the right executive, aligning her work with business priorities, and earning trust before the opportunity appeared.

In this episode, I’ll show you:

• Why mentors are valuable but not enough
• What sponsors actually do for your career
• Why promotion decisions happen before roles are posted

• How talent reviews really work behind closed doors

• How to map the executives who matter

• How to build sponsor relationships without asking for favors
• Why executive trust must be earned before the moment arrives

If you’re a technology leader who keeps delivering results but still feels unseen, this episode will help you understand who needs to know you, who needs to trust you, and who needs to be willing to say your name when you are not in the room.

Timestamps

00:00 — Your promotion is being decided without you
00:20 — Who is speaking for you in the room?
00:39 — Why technology leaders get overlooked
00:54 — Why your manager and mentor may not be enough
01:29 — Supportive relationships vs advancing relationships
01:48 — What talent reviews actually look like
02:24 — Why someone must put credibility behind your name
02:41 — Mentor vs sponsor explained
03:12 — Why talented technology leaders stall
03:29 — Sponsors are built, not assigned
03:47 — Executive Leap diagnostic mention
04:04 — Jane’s story: ready but passed over
04:42 — Jane had a network, but no sponsor
04:59 — Mapping the executive landscape
05:20 — How Jane became useful to the right executive
05:55 — Building trust through consistent value
06:16 — How sponsorship led to the VP opportunity
06:47 — Step 1: Map the executives who matter
07:04 — Step 2: Align with their goals early
07:39 — Step 3: Earn trust before the moment arrives
08:13 — Mentors help you grow, sponsors help you advance
08:47 — Diagnostic and Executive Leap session
09:35 — Closing: stop waiting for your work to speak for itself