Leaning Toward Wisdom

Go beyond the horizon. See the whole rainbow.

Change The Way You See Others

According to the authors of the book, Change The Way You See Everything, asset-based thinkers learn how to see other people through positive filters. Experience and life teach us to focus on the negative, or to incorporate deficit-based thinking. That's why we can easily spot the bad traits in each other. And like those pictures with hidden messages, once we see the negative - we can't avoid seeing it. Like the picture below.

Can you read the message?

Make opposition matter, advise the authors. Instead of immediately taking a side, assuming the opposing side to be wrong, consider the possibility that both sides may have validity. What new truth can you create together using the opposition as a catalyst for improvement.

Asset-based thinkers foster resolution. Find resolution fast. Tell the truth fast when it involves a tough situation. That's much smarter (and wiser) than digging into a position and going on the defense. They cite this story.

A marketing executive once told me that whenever a client pushed back on an idea or argued with him, before responding to the verbal attack, he would make eye contact and say to himself, "I love this guy. He's sharp and bold. I love his conviction."

People know if we're with them or against them. Asset-based thinking requires us to work together.

It also requires solid reflection. The book offers an exercise to help us.

1. Select one person you interact with on a regular basis (at least twice a week). Pick somebody you admire and respect. Reflect on recent experiences you have had together.

2. Zero in on what this person did to stimulate rewarding, productive, enlightening, or humorous interactions.

3. Decide when and how you will communicate your asset-based observations to this person. Communicate through voicemail, telephone, or in person - not by email. It lacks emotional intelligence.

4. Repeat this entire process. Only this time, select a person who frustrates or annoys you. No kidding - if you do this step, it will change the way you see a whole host of other people who, at the moment, drive you slightly to moderately crazy.

TIP: If you do this reflection every Friday afternoon, it will help the next week get off to a great start.

Change The Way You See Situations

Asset-based thinking begins in your own mind. Look long. Look wide. Look behind you. Look ahead. Look left. Look right.

The wider the lens, the better the view."

When tough situations erupt you may lean toward quick reaction. Instead, just breathe. Deeply. Slowly.

We can pause a problem and see it in slow motion if we intentionally slow things down. For those of us who are really proactive, it can be best to ignore the situation in the moment so we give ourselves time to find ways to move past it or around it.

We'd do well to reverse the 80-20 rule. Instead of looking at our problems 80% of the time, and our opportunities 20% of the time...flip it. Focus on opportunities 80% of the time and the challenges only 20% of the time.

So often we concentrate too much on our failings, or limitations. Instead, what if we considered our flaws, shortcomings and limitations as complimentary to our talents, strengths and abilities?

Great vision accompanies asset-based thinking. Engage your imagination and you'll be able to see the future before it ever happens. Set your goals. Aim high.

This is the recommendation of the authors for widening our lens during everyday adversity.

Step 1

Monitor your first thoughts when you encounter adverse situations such as a traffic jam, missed deadline, or personal disappointment. If your thoughts are argumentative, e.g.

its time to turn the light on

Change How You Think: Asset-Based Thinking vs. Deficit-Based Thinking

Age has brought with it a yearning. For simplicity.

A decade ago I began a fascination with minimalism. I'm a non-practicing minimalist. I love the idea. I just haven't found the energy to do it. It still captivates me though because it's simple. Easy. Void of unnecessary stuff. More of a distraction-free way to live.

Persuasion and communication have been central components of my professional life. Personal development, cognitive research and the power of the mind have been staple subjects of the book I'm most drawn to read. Today's show is a short series of podcasts about a book I'm re-reading, "Change The Way You See Everything."

Enjoy!

Mentioned in today's episode:

- Zen Habits by Leo Babauta

- Jim Rohn

- Soar With Your Strengths by Donald O. Clifton / Paula Nelson

- Change The Way You See Everything Through Asset-Based Thinking by Kathryn D. Cramer, Ph.D and Hank Wasiak

- Mat Kearney song, Closer To Love ("one phone call from our knees") the video is below; buy anything Mat Kearney produces

- Early To Rise

- BulaNetwork.com/about (to see some of the WHO's that matter to me)

Walking into a stand of pine trees is a favorite place

I no longer live in an area rife with pine trees, but I spent the bigger part of my youth amidst them. For me, there's nothing like a nice stand of pine trees with needles covering the ground. It's a natural insolation from the world. The smell. The feel. The serenity.

Sadly, my adulthood solitude hasn't included pine trees. Mostly, it happens in random places sought out at the spur of a moment. It often happens inside a car. Today's show was recorded in a car. Parked in a parking lot with windows lowered about 1/4 of the way. The sounds of nearby traffic and a clear blue sky over head.

Sometimes we need to find a place with a lower noise floor so we can think more clearly. Introspection demands a focus we don't often get in today's constantly plugged-in environment.

People regularly eat with a fork in one hand and their iPhone in the other. They don't talk to the people two feet from them, often preferring to interact with people miles away who mean much less to them. Important conversations give way to Words-With-Friends, which is an ironic name implying that valuable words are exchanged with friends. Racket replaces relationships even though relationship building gets tons of lip service. Increasingly, it means connecting with people who can help promote us, or make us look bigger, more successful or more popular.

A moment arrives, perhaps out of the blue, and suddenly the urge hits us. We need an instant change of scenery. We need a quiet place to be alone. Away from the ordinary distractions. Including the Internet. And cell phones.

Alone. With just our thoughts. And perhaps our beliefs and convictions.

To ponder. To wonder. To let our minds help us find solutions or options.

These days I mostly find solitude from inside my car, parked in the exact same location where I recorded a podcast over at BulaNetwork about the death of my best friend, Stanley.

What does your solitude look like?

Me with Easton Cantrell, my 10-month-old grandson in south Alabama

a large stand of pine trees near Dothan, Alabama where I took Easton

Breaking Bad concluded last night. I was captivated initially by the quality of the writing on the show. Throughout the series I've read many interviews with the writers. The writing room for that show fascinates me. Six or seven people in a room in Burbank crafting this remarkable story --- clearly able to do some things together that none of them would be able to do alone!

When I was young President Kennedy had thrown down the gauntlet to put a man on the moon before the end of the 60's. NASA accomplished that goal on July 20, 1969 with Apollo 11. Many of those young NASA engineers reported that it was the best work of their lives.

Both Breaking Bad and Apollo missions are a hard act to follow. People commonly report how badly they miss the collaboration. People miss working along side others toward a common goal. Working alone just isn't the same.

Sometime in the late 1990's while browsing through a bookstore I noticed a brightly colored book entitled, Working Solo: The Real Guide to Freedom & Financial Success with Your Own Business by Terri Lonier. Prior to that I don't recall hearing anything about working solo. The term "solopreneur" wouldn't arrive on the scene until much later.

Then, around 2001 another book caught my eye. Free Agent Nation: How America's New Independent Workers Are Transforming the Way We Live by Dan Pink gave new meaning, at least to me, to the term "freelancing."

I was a chief executive at the time, responsible for many people and assets. I was never working alone. Honestly, at that point, the thought never crossed my mind. But these two books prodded the gerbils to start running inside their wheels.

It began like most things - a daydream. A fantasy. A "wouldn't that be nice?" kind of a thought.

Today's show consists of my observations about working alone vs. working in collaboration with others.

Also mentioned in today's show:

• Jay Leno's Garage YouTube channel and Batman's Tumbler

• BulaNetwork.com - my main hangout | a special episode about my best friend (our collaborations were special)

Thanks for listening,

"I don't know what to do next."

Grinding it out. That's the stuff of success, but it's not fun or glamorous.

It's arduous. Lonely. Difficult.

In today's show I want to talk with you about doing what's next to take you closer toward the success you're chasing. It may be that you don't know what to do, but more often than not - I find people do know what to do next. They simply don't want to do it. Because it's hard.

We want the performance. We don't want the practice.

But without the practice - the hard work of preparation - we never will get to perform. Or our performance will fail.

I hope you'll embrace the good feeling and sense of accomplishment that comes with grinding it out by doing what's next!

P.S. Just because...

Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs (illustrated to the left) isn't the only list of purported needs. Famed American psychologist Edward L. Thorndike did his own research on the needs of mankind. And there are others.

Each of them have their merits, and proponents - as well as critics.

You're always looking for an edge. Some insight. That's what Maslow put at the top of his pyramid.

According to him, you've got to make sure you've got those four other things underneath your feet first.

Watch any survival reality show and the evidence is clear. They always go after the first two blocks of the pyramid. The basic essentials have to be in place before you can think about anything else.

No food. No safe place to sleep. Nothing else matters!

The guy talks about all his credit card debt. It's approaching $10,000. He's battling to find enough cash flow to buy food. Forget the house. It's gone. The car? His mom gave him hers.

He's got dreams of making it big. There's a SasS (software as a service) business in his head that he knows can earn millions. Maybe. Maybe not.

So far, he's got a bunch of notes, some drawings, a mindmap or two and seemingly, a lot of misplaced optimism.

Guys like him are all around. You see them on the Internet posting comments, clapping every time their favorite guru says something remotely intelligent. They're the people in the stands who buy the tickets, enroll in the courses, cram themselves into conference rooms and look wide-eyed at the Internet celebrities who have "made it."

It's their credit card debt that may helping some marketers generate 5-figure monthly revenues.

As for our future Saas entrepreneur, he's among the ranks of many I've seen in the past ten years. I watch with heightened curiosity, hoping he figures it out soon. I'm not optimistic though. Not because I'm a pessimist, but because I've seen this movie before. It just hardly ever ends well. It's not a comedy. It's a tragedy.

Lately, I'm not in much mood for tragedies.

He says he doesn't want to work for anybody ever again. Nobody gets rich, nobody is successful if they work for the man. Or WOman.

He believes it. Evidence? He's always worked for the man and he's poor as Job's turkey.

Today's show is about two (just 2) big ideas. They're not complicated, but they are profound. They may be just what you need, too - because there just aren't very many of us who don't need them.

Strength of the champion is determined by strength of the field

Competition is a dirty word among a large number of younger entrepreneurs. Admittedly, I don't get it. But I'm no longer a young entrepreneur. Besides that, I grew up in retailing where it was dog eat dog.

When I was about 27 I was courted by a large retailer out of the west coast. During an interview at DFW International Airport I was asked about how I viewed merchandising. In particular, I was asked how I felt about retail pricing. Not knowing exactly what the CEO meant, I paused and listened. Without allowing time for a response, and realizing that his question was clear as mud, he said, "We want our competition to open the paper and choke on their coffee at how low our prices are."

Even though I had over a decade of retailing expertise by this point, I had a keen awareness of how to be profitable in retailing. I knew if you were not the low cost leader, with all the associated scope and scale kind of advantages (think Wal-Mart), then it was a losing game. By the way, without answering his question, I politely informed him that I wasn't likely the guy he was looking for. After a nice visit we boarded our respective planes and went our separate ways. Within a few years his company filed bankruptcy.

There are winners and losers in every area of endeavor. We see it most vividly in sports because there are televised games that have a beginning, an end and a scoreboard. We know who won. We know who lost. Some games come down to the wire. Others appear to be over early on.

Championships, on the other hand, are usually determined over a prolonged series of competitions. Wal-Mart began in  a little Arkansas town, Rogers, back in 1962. By 1980 they had reached the billion dollar mark, the fastest any company had reached that milestone. In 1983 the first Sam's Club was built in Midwest City, OK and in 1988 the first Wal-Mart SuperCenter opened combining general merchandise with a full-blown grocery store. In 1990 Wal-Mart was the champion, the number one retailer! It took them 28 years and during that time they bested various competitors. Today, they're still battling hard against discount chains and grocery chains. In retailing, champions don't last forever. Study a company you've never heard of called Korvettes.

Champions need competition. Good competition. If the competition is weak, the championship is considered weak.

Already I've heard some in tennis talking about the men's and women's Wimbledon champions. Many big name players were eliminated early on. A few commentators have noted that the current champions had a path to the championship that may be unlikely in the future. I don't know about that because I'm not a tennis expert, but I understand the concept. If the field is weak, the champion doesn't stand out quite as much.

Fact is, champions need the field. If there is no field - no competition - then there can be no champion.

Win-Win

Of or being a situation in which the outcome benefits each of two often opposing groups

Guaranteeing a favourable outcome for everyone involved

I have no idea who first came up with the "win-win" phrase, but it was likely a politician or a savvy negotiator. Whoever it is, I wouldn't trust them as far as I could throw them. They've likely set the world record for duping people.

It's a pleasant thought. Nobody loses. Everybody wins.

It's a lie.

No, it's  not impossible for everybody to come out ahead in a single scenario, but we can't all be champions. A few weeks ago the Dallas Stars Hockey Club facillitated a trade with the Boston Bruins. Both teams traded away skilled players in order to get from the other, different skilled players. Most hockey experts felt each team did well and improved their roster. However,

“I'm not young enough to know everything.”

― J.M. Barrie, The Admirable Crichton

Gadgets.

Gizmos.

They're synonymous.

Interchangeable.

Two of my favorite G words, although I am particularly fond of the word gynotikolobomassophile.*

Gadgets and gizmos, as I use those terms, don't refer to things with names I don't know, or can't recall. Rather, gadgets and gizmos are cool tools and useful, if not necessary, items. I'm thinking of sunglasses, pens, watches, bicycles, flashlights, headphones, recorders and so much more!

Inside The Yellow Studio

Today I'm surrounded by gadgets and gizmos. A quick cursory count of buttons on my audio mixers and processors inside The Yellow Studio reaches 160. There are 142 sliders or knobs and well over 80 jacks. These are just some of the components that make up gadgets and gizmos. It's impossible to have a good gadget or gizmo in a studio that lacks buttons, knobs, sliders or jacks!

I've got four microphones around here: 2) Heil PR40's, 1) EV RE50B and 1) RODE NTG2. I've also got at least 2 lavaliere mics: 1) Audio-Technica ATR-3350 and 1) Giant Squid (you gotta have a gizmo named, Giant Squid).

I've got an Edirol R09HR digital recorder. Somewhere I've got a little Olympus digital recorder. Headphones abound. A Jawbone blutooth device is around here some place...and so much more!

I got to looking around here, thinking about my life with gadgets and gizmos and all the fun times I've had with them. I'm not a terribly materialistic person, but I confess that I've had a lifelong love affair with gadgets and gizmos.

Two Of The Most Important Gadgets Of My Childhood

See that Deluxe Schwinn Sting-Ray® in the upper lefthand corner of that ad? I had one just like that. Same color and everything. Ten bucks more and I could have the Super Deluxe, but it was a gift from my parents. They weren't Super Deluxe kind of people, but I was thrilled anyway.

No matter, my mobility factor skyrocketed since I had been previously been limited to using my PF Flyers to get about. Now, me and my PF Flyers could ride in style and comfort that only a banana seat on a Sting-Ray could provide.

When I was 15 I saved my money for what seemed like forever so I could buy a GAF Super 8 movie camera. It was among the first major purchases I remember making. It was almost $200 so I vividly remember going to the store to buy it. One 40' roll of film, which required professional processing, would last about 2-1/2 minutes. Then you had to have a projector and a screen (or a white sheet hung up on the wall) to show it. If you wanted home movies, you needed lots of gadgets. And time. And money. That was the late 1960's and early 1970's.

Today, I've got at least 5 digital video devices within reach of me as I type this. A built in webcam (that's 1). An external webcam (that's 2). An iPhone (that's 3). A Kodak Zi8 sitting nearby (that's 4) and a Canon point and shoot camera that will also shoot video (that's 5). Three of the five (maybe 4) will shoot in HD.

We don't make home movies any more. We shoot video.

This Magazine Was A Game Changer

A classmate showed me a Playboy magazine when I was in 2nd grade, but that's not the magazine that was a game changer for me. Well, at least I don't think it was. I was mostly horrified at the time because I knew it was wrong. I told my parents about it when I got home. My dad and I drove to the kid's house who brought it to school. I sat in the car while my father confronted his dad. The kid's mom was our 2nd grade teacher. I'm guessing that's why my dad decided to confront the boy's father. It didn't go anywhere. Turns out his dad didn't much care.

Few things fascinated me more than the cool stuff you could buy in the back of Popular Science ma...