Learning to be

In this episode, Ruth and Learning to be host, Amy Houldey, discuss how hustle culture permeates all areas of life including pregnancy and parenting. They share their own stories and experiences of trying to challenge the hustle by listening to their own intuition, relinquishing control, and being open to the twists and turns that life throws at you.

This is an open and honest conversation about what it’s really like to be pregnant and/or a parent not what it SHOULD be like.

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

@theantihustleproject

After living in London and working in the rat-race, podcast guest Ruth, founder of the Anti-Hustle Project, made the conscious decision to leave the city and start doing work she felt more passionate about, at a pace that suited her so she could have more time and flexibility to simply live life. But this dream slowly turned into a nightmare as Ruth got sucked deeper into hustle culture, following all of the advice out there about what you need to do to set-up an online business and what it means for that business to be "successful".

This resulted in Ruth experiencing complete burnout and resenting her coaching work, so she closed the business and instead started to reflect on the impact hustle culture is having on all of us and whether it is actually possible to live an anti-hustle life. And out of this question, the anti-hustle project was born.

Learning to be podcast host, Amy Houldey talks to Ruth about her journey so far. Their conversation touches on many different topics from being open about money and how people fund their online businesses, to career and how this plays such an important part in our identity, as well as battling between wanting to earn money but not at the expense of everything else, and the importance of actually being content rather than always looking to the next goal.

Enjoy!

Connect with Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

Connect with Ruth:

@theantihustleproject

antihustleproject.com

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, talks to her mum (Val). They discuss what it felt like when Val became a mother in the 80s and had to go back to work at a time when she felt that was frowned upon.

They also chat about identity and how there are lots of different parts to people that need to be nourished even when becoming a mother. Val shares the guilt that she felt at times because she didn’t think she was living up to the idealised image of what a mother should be. And Amy and Val talk about how they’ve all put in the effort to connect and understand each other as a family so that they can build real relationships with each other as adults and not just feel stuck in the roles of parent and child.

Connect with Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, talks to Rochelle Robertson. Rochelle is the founder of the vulnerable project, as well as working in her full-time job as a Youth Programme Manager at Creative Mentor Network.

Unsurprisingly, Amy and Rochelle talk a lot about vulnerability. Rochelle describes her struggle with her own vulnerability that led her to want to explore this in her work with the vulnerable project. She talks about how she’s been confronted with her vulnerability on a physical level by her body shutting down.

They also chat about the complexities of parent/child relationships, and Rochelle opens up about the healing process of connecting with her dad.

Rochelle also speaks about not letting the trauma she’s experienced in her life define her, and doing the work now so that when she does decide to have children, they won’t have to carry that burden.

Rochelle is a truly beautiful human who's been doing some incredibly important work by sharing her own and others stories of vulnerability.

TRIGGER WARNING: sexual abuse is discussed in this episode.

Links to books and people referred to in this episode:

Brene Brown, The Power of Vulnerability

Donna Lancaster, The Bridge Retreat

David Richo, How to be an Adult in Relationships

Connect with Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

Connect with Rochelle:

@vulnerabeproject

@allysarochelle

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, talks to Remi Ray. Remi has achieved so much in her life already. In her early twenties she launched her first business, a plus sized vintage boutique, she’s also the founder of the British Plus Size Fashion Weekend, and she’s launched her own collection Remi Ray London. As if that wasn’t enough, Remi also offers coaching support, and organises regular events to help other women get into business.

In this episode, Amy and Remi talk about the importance of honesty and always being yourself even in this crazy instgrammed world. Remi tells her own story about how her drive and creativity came from watching her mum and her god mother when she was growing up.

And they discuss love and relationships. How they can break us apart, but also complete us, the importance of being two separate beings as well as a partnership, communicating and managing personality differences.

Connect with Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

Connect with Remi:

@iamremiray

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, talks to Leona Nichole Black. Leona is a passionate educator, tarot therapist, and wellbeing advocate. She’s also a black British academic currently working on her PhD, “Beyond the problem of blackness” where she aims to explore and articulate black joy in the world we live in today.

Amy and Leona chat about building a life that works for you instead of following society’s blueprint, because success and happiness look and feel different for everyone. Leona shares her story about building her business from the heart and the joy and challenges that come with this.

They also discuss the identity shift that comes with deciding to follow a different path in your life, having to grieve what you’re losing but also birth something new.

And Leona talks openly about burnout, pushing through self-doubt to achieve the work she believes in, finding her voice as a tarot therapist, and navigating academia as a black woman from a working-class background and the lack of mental health support in this space.

Connect with Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

Connect with Leona:

@leonanicholeblack

nicholeblack.com

Book reference:

Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, speaks to her partner Ollie about how they've navigated the first months of parenthood. They talk openly and honestly about battling with gender roles, trying to figure out what kind of parents they want to be, the different pressures parenthood has placed on their relationship, and what they feel the most important things are in terms of keeping their own relationship alive.

Connect with Amy:

amyhouldey.com

@amyhouldey

In this episode, LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, talks to Maria Banobre, founder of Calm Mutha. They discuss how her business was born out of her determination to follow her heart rather than her head by leaving a successful career in TV in her thirties to start Calm Mutha. Maria also talks about how she helps people reframe birth in a positive way by empowering them to own their birth experience, as well as the change and awakening that occurs during and after birth. Maria also shares her own story around how her work is helping her to process and heal her own traumatic birth experience.

Amy:

@amyhouldey

amyhouldey.com

Maria:

@calmmutha

calmmutha.com

LEARNING TO BE host, Amy Houldey, introduces you to the podcast, a platform for real and honest conversations about self-acceptance and the journey of self-discovery. Amy also talks about her work as a life coach and what led her to this occupation.

Amy Houldey Insta: @amyhouldey

Amy Houldey website: amyhouldey.com