Dear BLVED, let us pick back up where we left off with John Paul II’s letter to women. 

In this section there are 3 main themes JP II talks about that we will dive into.

1. The basis of the dignity of women

After going through the long history of humanity, John Paul II says that “the secret of making speedy progress in achieving full respect for women and their identity involves more than simply the condemnation of discrimination and injustices, necessary though this may be. Such respect must first and foremost be won though an effective and intelligent campaign for the promotion of women, concentrating on all areas of women’s life and beginning with a universal recognition of the dignity of women.”(6) He mentions that reason and the word of God are what help us understand and grasp the “anthropological basis of the dignity of women, making it evident as a part of God’s plan for humanity.”(6) 

As John Paul II often does, he goes right back to the beginning, with creation. God creates man in His image - this tells us what is distinct about the human being. Then we are told that man was created “male and female” (Gen 1:27). The first man Adam was created but he was alone. “The creation of woman is thus marked from the outset by the principle of help; a help which is not one-sided but mutual. Woman complements man, just as man compliments woman: men and women are complementary. Womanhood expresses the “human” as much as manhood does, but in a different and complementary way.(7) He also mentions that this help, that man is to each other, is not merely acting, but also being. 

The request by God to “fill the earth and subdue it” (Gen 1:28) is spoken to both man and woman. “In this task, which is essentially that of culture, man and woman alike share equal responsibility from the start.”(8) The theme of the upcoming conference on women is “Action for Equality, Development and Peace”(8) and John Paul II says that the progress that has happened is largely by the hands of women. 

2 Progress

Progress, although usually measured according to science and technology, JP II states that the more important measurement should be that of the social and ethical dimension. “In this area, which often develops in an inconspicuous way beginning with the daily relationships between people, especially within the family, society certainly owes much to the ‘genius of women’”.(9) He goes on to share his appreciation for all those women who have dedicated themselves to education in every such way. 

3 Service 

Mary as our example of the genius of woman put herself in God’s service and a the service of others. John Paul II calls this “a service of love”(10) “For her, ‘to reign’ is to serve! Her service is ‘to reign’! This is the way in which authority needs to be understood, both in the family and in society and the Church.”(10)

“In this perspective of ‘service’-which, when it is carried out with freedom, reciprocity and love, expresses the truly ‘royal’ nature of mankind- one can also appreciate that the presence of a certain diversity of roles is in no way prejudicial to women, provided that this diversity is not the result of an arbitrary imposition, but is rather an expression of what is specific to being male and female.”(11) Thus women’s role in the church is not the same as all men, which does not detract from their dignity at all. Rather, it tells of the plan of God in the sacramental economy. There is much to be learned from the Gospel that will make clear this point further, but it in no way hinders women from making a big impact in the Church and in the world. JP II mentions St. Catherine of Siena and St. Teresa of Avila who were instrumental in the life of the Church both institutionally and to the individual members during their lifetimes. 

John Paul II concludes this letter by again stating his hopes for the upcoming conference on women and says: “Necessary emphasis should be placed on the ‘genius of women’, not only by considering great and famous women of the past or present, but also those ordinary women who reveal the gift of their womanhood by placing themselves at the service of others in their everyday lives. For in giving themselves to others each day women fulfill their deepest vocation. Perhaps more than men, women acknowledge the person, because they see persons with their hearts. They see them independently of various ideological or political systems. They see others in their greatness and limitations; they try to go out to them and help them. In this way the basic plan of the creator takes flesh in the history of humanity and there is constantly revealed, in the variety of vocations, that beauty-not merely physical, but above all spiritual-which God bestowed from the very beginning on all, and in a particular way on women.”(12) 

This wraps up our discussion on John Paul II’s Letter to Women. If you liked these ’study’ episodes and would like to see more of them - let me know. And send me a DM, email, or leave a comment if you want to recommend a specific book or writing to study next! 

We are made for community - yet we live in a really lonely culture. Communities have existed since God created Adam and Eve. That was the way that God designed it. But somewhere we got caught up in progress and “making the world a better place” that we actually left what is really important behind. 

It’s important to recognize though, that we are not alone in this struggle. You are not alone in feeling alone. Literally everyone is in the same boat. 

Social media gives the illusion of connection and the occasional real connection and community. Don’t get me wrong it can bring forth really strong community and connection, but that is often the exception, and not the rule. 

This Sunday I heard a homily that really stuck with me on this theme of community. Among other things, he said to have community you need to lead people, you need to follow people, and you need to be walking arm in arm with people. This three fold explanation of community makes total sense! We fall short of even understanding community if we are so focused on only one of these three components.

The homily really helped me see that there are different roles that each of us play. We do not have community when we are only leading. We do not have community when we are only following. We do not have community when we are only walking arm in arm with others. Which is what we normally think of when we think of community. 

We are all at different points in our lives. Even those we are linking arms with can be ahead of us and we can be learning from them as well. It does not have to be so black and white that we can never lead or learn from someone just because that isn’t their “normal” role. That’s the great thing about community, it comes up around each other and gives everyone what they need. 

So I leave you with the question, who are you leading? Who are you following? And who are you linking arms with? 

There is a disparity between the need for community and what is actually happening in the world today. And the only way that is going to change is if we build up our own communities. There is a new book by Jennie Allen called “Find your People”. It’s about the need for community but also the practical implementation that you need to start building community! I have really been enjoying the read and been so inspired to implement these changes in my own life. For the month of July on the podcast we are going to do a book study of this book. I invite you to go get the book, and join us here on the podcast so that we can learn and implement it together. We all need some accountability and what better place than to start building up community?! 

Join me this July reading “Find your people” by Jennie Allen. 

Here is the schedule: 

July 4th - Part 1 We Need Each Other

July 11th - part 2 The Path to Connection, chapters 5&6 Close and Safe

July 18th - Part 2 The Path to Connection, chapters 7-9 Protected, Deep, and Committed

July 25th - Part 3 Fighting for Your Village 

You have two weeks to get the book and read part 1. I can’t wait to grow in this season with you

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Welcome to the first ‘study’ episode. My hope for these episodes are that we are able to dive into important works, whether books, letters, or quotes, and discuss them together. 

Up first is John Paul II’s Letter to Women

This letter is often quoted and referred to as an important work of John Paul II and the Church’s approach to women and women’s issues. Let’s dive in to see why.

This letter was written in June of 1995 and was addressed to ‘women throughout the world’. It is the first letter from a pope addressed specifically to women. The occasion for the letter was stated by JP II as being the eve of the United Nations Organization Fourth World Conference on Women. This letter comes after a document that he sent to the Secretary General of the conference stating some basic points of the Church’s teaching regarding women’s issues. 

He now shifts his focus and speaks “directly to every woman” on the topic of “the essential issue of the dignity and rights of women, as seen in the light of the word of God.” And he begins this discussion with a word of thanks. This often quoted part of the letter goes through each category of women and thanks them for their role and the work that they do. 

“Thank you, women who are mothers!… Thank you, women who are wives!… Thank you, women who are daughters and women who are sisters!… Thank you, women who work!… Thank you, consecrated women!… Thank you, every woman, for the simple fact of being a woman!” 

After these deep and concrete thank you’s, he goes on to say that he recognizes that saying thank you is not enough. “Women’s dignity has often been unacknowledged and their prerogatives misrepresented; they have often been relegated to the margins of society and even reduced to servitude. This has prevented women from truly being themselves and it has resulted in a spiritual impoverishment of humanity.” (3) He goes on to say that the Church herself is not entirely faultless in this and apologizes on behalf of the Church and calls for a “renewed commitment of fidelity to the Gospel vision”.(3) Taking Christ and the Gospel as the example. 

Examining the past in order to assign responsibility where it is due, John Paul II goes on to say: “Women have contributed to that history as much as men and, more often than not, they did so in much more difficult conditions. I think particularly of those women who loved culture and art, and devoted their lives to them in spite of the fact that they were frequently at a disadvantage from the start, excluded from equal educational opportunities, underestimated, ignored and not given credit for their intellectual contributions… To this great, immense feminine ‘tradition’ humanity owes a debt which can never be repaid. Yet how many women have been and continue to be valued more for their physical appearance than for their skill, their professionalism, their intellectual abilities, their deep sensitivity; in a word, the very dignity of their being!”(3) 

What is important to note here is that this is not just a historical problem - there are still ways where women are being treated shy of their dignity. “We need only think of how the gift of motherhood is often penalized rather than rewarded, even though humanity owes its very survival to this gift. Certainly, much remains to be done to prevent discrimination agains those who have chosen to be wives and mothers.” (4) John Paul II goes on to predict the role of women in the solution of serious problems that we face, such as: “leisure time, the quality of life, migration, social services, euthanasia, drugs, health care, the ecology, etc.”(4) 

Then he shifts his focus to speak about the dark history of violence agains women in the area of sexuality. He condemns this history and calls for the defense by law for women who find themselves treated this way. Going further and speaking about the pressure and often choice to abort a child conceived in such circumstances he says something incredibly important. “But before being something to blame on the woman, it is a crime for which guilt needs to be attributed to men and to the complicity of the general social environment.”(5) Why is this statement so important? 1) It is important that this is said by the pope because so often the “religious” argument against abortion is equated to punishment for the woman who finds herself in this situation. And 2) because not only does he call men to take responsibility for their actions, he calls upon the “general social environment”. If such societies continue to do nothing about violence in this way, they too are held accountable. To this he says “My word of thanks to women thus becomes a heartfelt appeal that everyone, and in a special way States and international institutions, should make every effort to ensure that women regain full respect for their dignity and role.”(6) 

With that we will end here, stay tuned for part 2!

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Today on the show we have our next guest, Elizabeth Hince

Elizabeth Hince is from Texas, but currently living in Rome, Italy, while her husband is pursuing a License in Theology. As a wife and mother she enjoys playing along with the antics of her 1 year old daughter while preparing to welcome baby #2 this fall! She loves to host friends and travel, especially to countries off the beaten path, and in her "free" time, she is pursuing a Masters of Psychology. You can follow her along on Instagram: @a_joyfilled__life

Today we dive into the topic of the gift of singleness! 

Give it a listen! 

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There is a lot of advice out there for the waiting season. Many women are told to wait - seemingly endlessly. I don’t believe that is good advice.

Disclaimer* there are seasons where we are explicitly called to wait and in those seasons passive waiting may be what you are called to

I invite you to reframe how you think of waiting, and if you are not explicitly called to wait than you are called to do, live, love, as you were created by God. This is active waiting. He made the world, He sent His Son to show us how to live rightly, holy people have followed, Mary and other saints that we can look up to - we have no excuse not to know what to do. If we do not move forward nothing will ever happen.

Story: I got sick a couple years back - I had to leave grad school. It was a long and weary time. And I found myself putting my life on hold - I can’t pursue this dream until, I am better, until I finish grad school, until, until, until… That was a huge lie I was telling myself. 

At one point I stopped myself and had this realization that this is reality. It is not some bad dream I am automatically going to wake up from and everything be better again. I had to do something about it. So slowly but surely I stoped putting my life on hold. Its a little thing but I changed my living space around, started doing things towards my goals. I started my business during that time, yes even before I finished grad school! And because I was doing all of those things I had the courage to reach out to different schools because it was clear that I wasn’t able to finish the way I had started. I called other schools and figured out a way that I could finish up my last semester here in the States. 

Now I have been graduated for almost a year, my business is two years old, I am living a life I never thought possible in a good way. But I am not better from my illness. I am still sick. And sometimes I think and I wonder if I had never stepped out, started making moves in my life where would I be? And that is a scary thought. 

A lot of times I think of this story and many other stories others have shared with me about their own lives that had they listened to all the advice to just wait - their lives would look so different. 

Joan of Arc is a woman who also advocated for doing. So today we are going to get some advice from her on this topic. I have picked 3 quotes of hers that I think represent this idea of what to do in waiting periods. 

1. “If I am not, may God put me there; and if I am, may God so keep me.”

In this quote she is taking herself out of control - recognizing that trusting God in these moments requires us to let go of some control. She is humble, yet moving. She is not stagnant. Holding. Waiting. She is actively waiting, and constantly pursuing God’s will. 

From her here I think we can glean that active waiting requires a humility and trust. It doesn’t mean that the way that you do show up and act is void of God and His plan, but in harmony with it

1. “One life is all we have and we live it as we believe in living it. But to sacrifice what you are and to live without belief, that is a fate more terrible than dying.” 

What a power punch! She is not holding back here! 

A life not lived according to God’s plan or your beliefs is far worse than dying. Can you imagine that? This quote reminds me to remain close to God in all the acting. To constantly harken back to His will, my values, my why behind things because if that isn’t constantly checked sometimes we can get off track. Start chasing things we aren’t meant to chase. 

1. “Act, and God will act.” 

This quote is probably my favorite of hers - although she has many great ones. 

But this right here is what I am talking about. Act. Step up to the plate, answer the Lord’s call, do the thing you’ve been waiting on, take messy action, because in those moments you will not be left alone. God will show up. God will act. He will be with you in a BIG way. 

We are the body of Christ, His hands and His feet. If we do not serve others, or do things here on this earth, how will His will, His love be known and shown on this earth? 

And I leave you with one more quote as I like to end these episodes with a quote to chew on, 

“Go forward bravely. Fear nothing. Trust in God; all will be well.” 

St. Joan of Arc

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On today’s episode I am chatting with my long time best friend about friendship. Samantha is a wife, daughter, and an aspiring home chef. She works in new construction real estate by day, but loves to cook, travel, and spend time with family by night. You can follower her @sam-kbarton on instagram.

We met in college but it wasn’t best friends at first… We were in the same household at our university, similar to a sorority, and she was my big. We got along but didn’t really click as besties until she got sick with phenomena. After that we were pretty much inseparable. 

In the summers we would call each other every day, even just for 5 minutes at a time. Back at school everyone knew us as Sam and Laura - that’s how often we were together. 

Our time together gave us a great base in which our friendship could flourish because at this point we have been long distance friends longer than we have been in person. At points we were just across the country, at others across the world. It is much easier to maintain a friendship long distance these days with all the technology that is available to us. 

Having been friends for 7 years we have seen each other through a lot of different life seasons. Student, on our own, dating, engagement, marriage - we’ve been all the places together. There are some friendships that are meant for a season, but there are also friendships that transcend seasons and are with you through life, and that is a very sweet kind of friendship. 

Because people change and mature over time, friendships also have to change. The reason our friendship has been so “successful” over a long amount of time has been because we adapt to our new life stages. At one point we were free enough to talk every day. That looks different now, and it’s not a bad thing because it is not what we need any more. 

Sometimes it happens that one friend is going through a life change while the other isn’t. Or a stage of life has more to do with another than with that friend. It can be difficult trying to navigate these seasons because on one hand the needs of one friend changes, while the needs of the other stays the same. What can be done here? Communication is the key, and understanding where each other is coming from and making an effort to be there for your friend in their season. Friendships that are selfish won’t last. Friendship is a relationship and in relationships they need to be reciprocal to thrive. Think about the other, and communicate your needs clearly. 

We had so much fun recording this episode together for you! Let us know if you enjoyed it and would like to have Samantha come back! 

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Today’s short episode is all about John Paul II, his legacy, and what I am doing to carry on his work! 

John Paul II what a guy! He was a huge adventurer, loved sports, and his mind was incredible. He didn’t have an easy life but he made the best of it. Writing plays to perform with his friends, writing poetry, taking youth on camping adventures, his adventures knew no bounds. 

He was influential in a lot of ways but in particular, his mind was a huge gift. He spend a lot of time contemplating with the Lord. This influenced everything he did and all his writing and work. He had such draw to the real presence in the Eucharist that he would stop what ever he was going as he passed a chapel and he would go in and pray for hours. This became a logistical problem when he was pope, so much that he would be guided away from chapels so that he could stay on task and on time. Removing himself from what was going on the world to contemplate the Lord led him to his reflections on the topics in his writing and teaching. 

He was influential to two groups of people in particular: before his pontificate there was no pope or any really official writings from the Church specifically addressed to women. His writings to women were monumental for the Church’s understanding of women. Similarly his love for and words directed toward young people made a huge impact on the world and each young person in it. 

He is widely known for his work on the theology of the body and how those reflections have deepened so many people’s understanding of our human bodies. There are even people who have converted to the faith after encountering his reflections on theology of the body. Incredible. 

I speak about his theology of the body in my proximate marriage preparation program, Made BLVED. We dive deep into some of the main points of the theology of the body during the program. Enrollment is open now for a limited time! https://theblvedcollective.com/made-blved 

John Paul II’s legacy is incredible. I love JP II for so many reasons but I feel especially close to him in my work. I also have dedicated my life and work to young people and women, and knowing that I am such good company is comforting. 

He wrote a whole lot but this quote of his in particular I love. I even send it out to all of my clients! If you enroll in my program you’ll get one too. 

“It is Jesus that you seek when you dream of happiness; He is waiting for you when nothing else you find satisfies you; He is the beauty to which you are so attracted; it is He who provoked you with that thirst for fullness that will not let you settle for compromise; it is He who urges you to shed the masks of a false life; it is He who reads in your heart your most genuine choices, the choices that others try to stifle.

It is Jesus who stirs in you the desire to do something great with your lives, the will to follow an ideal, the refusal to allow yourselves to be ground down by mediocrity, the courage to commit yourselves humbly and patiently to improving yourselves and society, making the world more human and more fraternal.” 

John Paul II

Enrollment for Made BLVED is open now for a limited time. Enroll today: https://theblvedcollective.com/made-blved

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Today we have our very first guest here with us as we talk about what we are made for. In order to answer that question we have to start wide and narrow in. So first we need to understand where we are coming from and to where we are going. 

The answer to both is God. We come from God and we are living our lives to get back to Him in heaven. From this wide angle we can put into perspective all of the things. 

We can see what we are made for from this perspective. There are many answers here and we spoke about 3 in particular. 

1. We are made for relationship - daughter, friend, wife, mother

There are 4 fundamental relationships that man has, between man and God, between man and himself, between man and other men, and between man and the earth. These are fundamental to who we are as humans. 

1. We are made for beauty - especially as women, the crown of creation we emulate beauty to the world and to men. Beauty is all around us in this world and women have a great gift to be able to recognize it, make it flourish, and cultivate it in many areas. 

1. We are made for service - not “submissive” in the societal way that is assumed today, but always aiming to give of ourselves and putting others first like Christ at the last supper. Christ shows us that it is not weak to serve, in face it is the role of each of us. No one is above it. 

All of these things are great to recognize, and it can be beautiful to hear about the plan of God from this perspective, but we live in a fallen world. What do we do when “reality” seems so far from this? How do we strive to live out this truth when no one else is? Simply don’t give up or give in. Often the easy way out is consists of sin or falling short of the truth. Don’t take the easy way out. It sounds easy enough, but in reality it is not. But take heart, Christ has conquered the world. 

Our guest: 

Sarah Frigon is a Catholic photographer based in Phoenix, AZ. She is a cradle Catholic, but only began delving deep into the meaning of Catholicism in college, and since has had her life transformed by the truth of the Catholic faith. As an artist, she aims to reveal truth through beauty, striving to exemplify God's love and goodness through her work and relationships. 

You can find her at:

sarahkayphoto.com

@bysarahkay

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There is no question that there is a battle going on in our culture today. It is a battle between lies and the truth. It is a big topic and there are so many individual battles going on within this massive battle. One topic in particular is what we are talking about today: the lies and the truth surrounding marriage and the family.

Even this is a HUGE topic. Between what marriage is and what is not is even vast. It is a huge topic because, as most people will get married, it effects everyone. Society is built on the backbone of the family. Tear down the family and society crumbles. This battle effects everyone. 

Married couples are navigating the battle from one perspective, but the question I want to pose is: how does this battle impact those who aren’t yet married? It effects them in a very specific and confusing way. 

The confusion that surrounds this battle is the work of the devil. The devil does two things - he makes so much noise in the culture that it becomes really confusing and hard to navigate and find the truth. With so much noise, it can be hard to hear the truth even if its right in front of you. The other thing that the devil does is he creates an illusion of isolation so that if you happen to find the truth, you feel like you’re the only one who believes it. Living the truth in this culture is difficult enough, but when you believe that you are the only one striving for these things, then it becomes infinitely more difficult. 

There is an obvious need to learn how to decipher the truth and I wish it was as easy as follow these 3 steps. But it’s not. The truth is that it takes a life time of honing your truth meter and constantly striving to stay aligned to the truth. 

Once the truth is found however, the battle is not over! We need perseverance, accountability and community to come up around us and champion us on. We need to struggle towards the truth with others, we are social creatures after all. We need the outlet to discuss our thoughts and hearts with others. We need to be seen in the struggle. As humans we are not perfect, we mess up. We need to be seen as human, as erring. In the world of social media it is nearly impossible not to feel like you can’t show the messy parts of your life to others. 

Even with all of this we cannot do it alone. We need true human community but also we need Christ. We need His truth, and His example. He is the way, the truth, and the life. 

What do we do with all of this now? First we need to find human community and run together toward Christ and His truth. I hope you all have supportive communities around you but if not, please reach out! I would love to support you in any way that I can. 

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Welcome to Dear BLVED! 

The Dear BLVED podcast is a place to dive deep into relationships, femininity, and the stages leading up to marriage. Conversations rooted in the truth and doing our part in carrying on the work of John Paul II. 

In this trailer episode get to know me, your host, Laura Jean, founder of The BLVED Collective, and learn about the ways that I am serving you. 

I fell in love with theology from a young age. There is something about the truth that convicts and piques your interest. I was introduced to John Paul II and his teaching on Theology of the Body and loved that theology has so much to say on the human person and our experience here on this earth. With this hunger to learn everything I could about these topics I studied Theology in college and went on to study marriage and family Theology in graduate school at the International Theological Institute. 

It was in grad school that I was struck with profound gratitude, not only for the things I was learning but because I was learning them as a young single woman. I knew that being formed in this way as a single person would impact every relationship I had moving forward and that is an incredible gift. I started thinking of ways that I can use my education to form young people in a similar way in the stages before marriage - and thats how I started The BLVED Collective. 

The BLVED Collective exists to form young Catholic’s in the truth. I bring together Theology, philosophy, and practicality in this formation which makes it unique and approachable. In order to do this I enlisted some help of some great saints who have done their own work much better than I ever can imagine I might in this field. The patron saints of The BLVED Collective are John Paul II, Sts. Louis and Zelie Martin, and Edith Stein.

There is a lot of confusion in todays world about what is true and what is not. Sifting through the lies and devious plans of the devil is not an easy task, nor one that we can handle alone. It is something that we need Christ and our communities to come up around us and help us in our journey towards the truth. 

The battle is not just a battle for marriages, other vocations are also effected. But what is crazy is that the preparations for other vocations is much longer than the preparation for marriage. Most people will get married, it is the natural vocation after all. However on average a young man will have 4-6 years of formation before he is ordained a priest and a young woman has about 4-8 years of formation before becoming a religious sister. This time of formation serves them well for their vocations and the duties that it entails. However marriage is not given the same formation period. On average the Church requires 6 weeks of formation for a couple before they can be married. That is simply not enough. 

Preparation for marriage should be something that happens from day 1. And it does as John Paul II notes in familiars consortio. But he also mentions different kinds of marriage preparation, some more intentional than others. This intentional formation is what I am doing to help this preparation deficiency in the Church today. I have created Made BLVED which is a proximate marriage preparation program designed with single and dating young people in mind. To give them a similar formation to what I was able to receive as a single person studying Theology in graduate school. This 12 week program is both intellectual and practical formation for the young person who would like to be married one day. 

In addition to Made BLVED which is the bread and butter here at The BLVED Collective, I also offer life formation coaching for young women and mentorship programs. Check out my website at www.theblvedcollective.com to learn more and to download some freebies to help you on your journey towards truth. 

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