Life in Focus Podcast

Ahhhhh happiness… we all seem to want more of it, and we’re in luck, because everywhere you look, someone seems to be selling it.

The thing with happiness is that it’s something only you can create for yourself. All those mushy inspirational meme are onto something. Lucky for you, my guest on episode 27 of Life in Focus is Dr. Brian King. Clinical psychologist, comedian, and author of the upcoming book The Laughter Cure. Dr. Brian is an expert in all things humor and happiness.

In this episode we talked about the health benefits of laughter – it’s a real thing with some hard science to back it up. We discussed what goes into creating a happier or more humorous outlook on life. Dr. Brian gives us some basic tips for improving a positive state of mind and shares some of his favorite comedians with us; its like a library of funny for you to pull from.

Don’t miss out, subscribe to the podcast, rate and review it. Seriously, review it please, Chris and I love to hear what you think of the show.

Take Home:

* There are real health benefits from laughter. The #1 benefit is stress reduction – so go ahead and find something to laugh about!

* Laughter makes people happier and happier people laugh more often… who knows which is the chicken and which is the egg, but it’s worth practicing.

* “Humor is an attitudes towards life.”

* We talk about people walking around with rose colored glasses. There are people who walk around with crap colored glasses; unhappiness like happiness is very much a state of mind, and the only person suffering from it is he who doesn’t choose to change it.

* Dr. Brian spent a long time trying to fit the role and image of a serious psychologist. It came at a cost. Being inauthentic is tiring.

* To improve happiness: try these things (and listen to the podcast for more) try meditating, watch 1/2 hour of comedy daily.

* Some recommendations by the Doc himself for that 30 min of daily humor: Bill Hicks, Bill Burr, Rodney Dangerfield,  Richard Prior, Louis CK, Jim Gaffigan, Amy Schumer, & Laurie Kilmartin

 

Laugh a Bit More with Dr. Brian King:

Originally from New York, Dr Brian started his “life of comedy” while attending preschool in Tampa, Florida. In his own 4th-grade words “behind our house, were some really big sticker bushes, but one day I fell in the prickers oh boy was I in trouble! I was screaming like crazy!” He continued, “I saw a German shepherd and I started to follow it to the middle of town! My mom and dad went frantic so they drove down town and saw me.” (King, 1981, unpublished manuscript). The rest is pretty boring and poorly written, even by fourth-grader standards.

Dr Brian somehow overcame an untreated case of ADHD and the lure of German shepherds to become a psychologist with a specialization in human sexuality. He has led many research projects, written papers, and presented at national conferences regarding his research on s-e-x. As a quick glance at the classified ads will surely indicate, Dr Brian found few job openings with the title of “sex researcher” and therefore opted for less impressive job titles as “Professor”, “Consultant”, and “French Fry Technician.”

In the early 2000s, he later added “Advice Columnist” to his resume, writing the humorous relationship advice column “Ask Dr G” for various independent publications.

Now living in Los Angeles and realizing that he had it right the first time,

“People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don’t believe in circumstances.

The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can’t find them, make them.”

– George Bernard Shaw 

That quote by George Bernard Shaw is one of my favorite, and it perfectly reflects my position on life. There is always a way to build the life that you want- it requires some creativity, often a lot of work, and at times compromise. In the end, however, for every dream there is a real world expression that is within your reach. Coach “Chef” David Wallach, our guest on Episode 26 of Life in Focus embodies this attitude, not just with his life, but in the way he encourages and directs the passions of others.

In this episode we discuss the difficulties we all have with change, and how often we go into it kicking and screaming, despite knowing we will be better for it. We talk resilience and what it means not just in the theoretical, but in real practical terms. Finally, we look at how personal determination, courage to face your fears, and the will to take action can really make the difference between defeat and success at this thing we call life. Sounds like a Life in Focus recipe – insight, courage to face roadblocks, and determination to act!!

 

Don’t miss out, subscribe to the podcast, rate and review it. Seriously, review it please, Chris and I love to hear what you think of the show.

Also, be kind, share it with a friend – helping others grow makes the world a better place, which means that sharing this podcast makes you a life sherpa!

 

Take Home:

* Even the people who seem the most comfortable with change …fear and resist it.

* Beware, the words that you use and the language you surround yourself with daily, shapes your view and the world you live in.

* “Excellence is a practice, not a state of being.” 

* It is through shear work, practice, trial and error that we rise to become the best version of ourselves. It is a mistake to assume that one is simply born exception.

* Human potential is UNLIMITED!

* There is something truly terrifying with our current tendency to shield our children and ourselves from any kind of hardship, conflict or distress. It leads to a level of fear and reactivity that has potentially deadly consequences.

 

More on Coach Wallach:

Chef’s life is food and fitness and he is among the happiest food, science, and functional fitness nerds around.

Knowing full well being an ‘expert’ means ‘knowing more and more about less and less’ he considers himself unduly blessed with the good fortune to be a lead instructor for the Crossroads Adaptive Athletic Alliance as well as Board Chairman of this nationally recognized 501(c)3 non-profit organization benefiting severely wounded veterans and civilian adaptive athletes. David is also a master chef and has taught Advanced Sports Nutrition to coaches and facilities owners on three continents over the last two decades.

After starting CrossFit in 2005 as his training of personal and professional choice, he ran head on into all things CrossFit as quickly as his feet could carry him only to discover the one thing more fun tha...

 

Have you ever met someone who seems positively fearless? Someone who (on the surface at least), appears to be truly gutsy and brave? Chef Kat Humphus of Savory Made Simple is that person. At age 18 Kat dropped out of college to attend Le Cordon Bleu culinary academy in Paris. She returned to her native San Diego and became the youngest executive chef in the Cohn restaurant group. She excelled in her trade/art for several years and then had a deep insight about what truly mattered to her. After years of success she dropped it all to open up her own business – and Savory Made Simple was born.

In episode 25 Kat, Chris, and I explore what it takes to pursue your passion, but also how to act fearlessly in the face of doubt, fear, and uncertainty. I’ll share a little secret here: it started with INSIGHT. But what kept it moving forward was her ability to face her fears and take ACTION with a mindset to thrive!

Read to the end for a great gift from the chef for Life in Focus followers.

Don’t miss out, subscribe to the podcast, rate and review it. Seriously, review it please, Chris and I love to hear what you think of the show.

Also, be kind, share it with a friend – helping others grow makes the world a better place, which means that sharing this podcast is like sharing a dessert, everyone is happier for it!

 

Take Home:

* Fearlessness isn’t about not having fears, it’s about knowing what they are and acting in spite of them.

* “I was tired of not having the control in my life to go look at windmills all day long, and that was it!”

* In life, it’s the challenges you face that get you moving. When things get too comfortable, too easy, we accept mediocrity, and adequacy instead of striving for greatness and thriving.

* Sometimes it’s through the eyes of others that we can best see who we are. In Kat’s case her roommate’s reminder that “everything [she touches] turns to success” was all she needed to trust herself and move forward with Savory Made Simple.

* Fear of loss keeps us from committing to change and growth. If you are holding back from growth in any area – love, work, hobbies…- ask yourself if your fears are reality based (you actually can’t do it) or loss based (you might commit and fail).

* Pay attention at minute 35 when Kat shares some amazing wisdom about how to be courageous and thrive.

 

More on Chef Kat:

” I am a classically trained Chef, a graduate of Le Cordon Bleu in Paris, France.

I have worked in Manhattan kitchens under famed chef Wylie Dufresne at WD-50, and also under world-renowned chef Thomas Keller at The French Laundry in Napa.

Upon returning to my hometown of San Diego, I began working under the Cohn Restaurant group umbrella, opening up 3 restaurants as Executive Chef—BO-beau kitchen + bar in 2010, 100 Wines Hillcrest in 2012, and BO-beau kitchen + roof tap in Long Beach in 2014.

I have been honored with the title of Best Chef 2014 by the Peninsula Beacon, in addition to winning Top Female Chef by Riviera Magazine and also Best Local Chef 2012 by Ranch & Coast Magazine.

Now back in San Diego with Kat’s Kitchen Collective, I cannot wait to bring exquisite cuisine to the everyday kitchen. From the kitchens of Paris, New York, Napa, and now…your own home!”

 

Jack Butler describes himself as a conscious agent of change, and that is exactly what he is trying to help others become. Being an agent of change literally means you strive to create and make a difference in your world. The conscious part refers to the type of change and the people who make it. It’s about being mindful, globally focused, self-aware, integrated, soulful, and being a leader. Sounds good to me, where do I sign up? But seriously, much of what Jack talks about are core values that are reflected in Life in Focus and in the desires you all have to build a life of purpose – whatever purpose means to you.

With Jack we discussed what it takes to create that self-awareness, how one’s needs, priorities and purpose will shift in life; sometimes being achievement driven, and other times insight driven. Jack is a business coach and strategist with a great understanding of human psychology and development. Most importantly he understands that knowing who you are and cultivating personal INSIGHT is central to living well and being able to create big changes in the world.

 

Don’t miss out, subscribe to the podcast, rate and review it.

Also, be kind, share it with a friend – helping others grow makes the world a better place, which means that sharing this podcast makes you a conscious agent of change!!!

 

Take Home:

*  A change agent is anyone committed to bringing something better in the world, to being an agent of the evolutionary process, to figuring out how to make it better.

* It is really important to feel inspired by your clients and the people you work with (heck yeah!).

* “You can coach or even orient your own life from two different place: one is the question, ‘What is the life I want to create?’ and the other question could be, ‘What does life want from you?'” The distinction may be a developmental one, in the first phase the issues is understanding to what extend someone may want to create/direct their life process, versus allowing their life to unfold the second is about finding to what extent someone wants to allow a life to unfold through them. Both processes are allowed and important!

* The values of an organization can appear both consciously and unconsciously. As with an individual, learning to look at your actions, to and see what values are represented, allows for an honesty and self-awareness that is part of being a conscious and purposeful entity. It’s about understanding what you stand for vs. what you want to stand for.

* Never forget that we as humans continue to develop and evolve throughout our life, which means that we can’t use a single framework to define ourselves.

 

More on Jack:

“I am a social entrepreneur, executive adviser and confidante, author, blogger, international workshop leader and speaker.

My core values are balance, integration, depth, pragmatism, contribution, love and authenticity.

I coach and advise conscious leaders, entrepreneurs and high-impact individuals.  I run online and in-person programmes on personal mastery, conscious leadership and full spectrum development. I convene a global tribe to support those at the integration of lifestyle design, consciousness, personal mastery and social change.

What is the difference between a goal, a resolution, and an intention? Why bother with any of them? That is what this week’s episode (23) of LīF is all about. Chris and I get together and not only define these three terms, but work in the episode to uncover his intention for 2016.

Bottom line, a goal is something specific you are working towards. A resolution is (for all intents and purposes) a random/vague and often unattainable goal that you arbitrarily set at the beginning of the year. An intention is a deeply personal direction and overarching focus you set for yourself. An intention is an expression of your desire to grow and evolve as a human being. It can be expressed through a number of actions or goals, and therefore is not something you fail at simply because you can’t make good on a single action.

 

Like what you’re hearing? PLEASE subscribe, review, and share. The more you put us out there, the more we can help. We also love to hear directly from you.

Here is a recent email sent from a new listener who is binge listening to LīF podcasts:

Just wanted to let you know I have now listened to about ten episodes of your podcast and I absolutely LOVE it. I’m not just saying this to make you (or me) feel good. I listen to many podcasts but never found anything like this. 

Best wishes, Caroline

Take home:

* Resolutions suck!

* Intentions are vastly superior and with my patients I am seeing an immediate improvement in their ability to take action, create change, and follow-through over time.

* Chris is going to create a meme to express his intention. A little bit like mine right here (which is my computer wall paper, as well as a small poster in my office). Anyone who comes up with a good intention and shares it with us through Life in Focus social media will get a meme created by Chris to use as inspiration for the year to come.

* My intentions all center around fear and challenging my own fears.

Our guest this week is Robb Wolf: scientist, author, speaker, entrepreneur, reality TV celebrity, father, and husband.  Robb is extremely intelligent, fiercely opinionated, a firm believer in being accountable for your choices, doesn’t have time to deal with excuses or complaints, and is the kind of person who leads movements rather than following them. Robb is a pioneer in the Paleo world, adding legitimacy through scientific proof to principles that came under a fair amount of attack from, well, just about anyone who didn’t see the value or benefit of a Paleo lifestyle.

This podcast, however, is not about Paleo. It is about life and how to create value, purpose, and satisfaction to build a world that is right for you. So we won’t be talking nutrition or macros with Robb, instead we discussed the big shifts he is making in his professional and personal life. We explored his thoughts on the future of this planet, and what it will take to survive and thrive if it all goes to hell in a hand basket.

Take Home:

*  It takes guts to leave something that has been incredibly successful and profitable to pursue a new passion, especially as a PARENT.

* “The movement in navigating the physical world is how we develop risk analysis circuitry in the brain that allows us to adequately risk analyze the rest of our lives.” – in other words learning how to balance on a beam as a kid helps you later understand how to evaluate and take on risk.

* To survive the big one (zombie, earthquake or other…) be sensible, be practical and get out of debt!

* Accountability is a huge piece of being a thriving human, whether we are talking about parenthood, or how you carry yourself personally and professionally, …take responsibility for your choices.

* Sometimes the greatest advancements come from those who sound the craziest in the early days.

 

About ROBB WOLF:

Robb Wolf, a former research biochemist is the New York Times Best Selling author of The Paleo Solution – The Original Human Diet. A student of Prof. Loren Cordain, author of The Paleo Diet, Robb has transformed the lives of hundreds of thousands of people around the world via his top ranked iTunes podcast, book, and seminars.

Robb has functioned as a review editor for the Journal of Nutrition and Metabolism, is co-founder of the nutrition and athletic training journal, The Performance Menu, co-owner of NorCal Strength & Conditioning, one of the Men’s Health “top 30 gyms in America” and he is a consultant for the Naval Special Warfare Resiliency program. He serves on the board of Directors/Advisors for: Specialty Health Inc, Paleo FX, and Paleo Magazine.

Robb is a former California State Powerlifting Champion (565 lb. Squat, 345 lb. Bench, 565 lb. Dead Lift) and a 6-0 amateur kickboxer. He coaches athletes at the highest levels of competition and consults with Olympians and world champions in MMA, motocross, rowing and triathlon. Wolf has provided seminars in nutrition and strength & conditioning to a number of entities including NASA, Naval Special Warfare, the Canadian Light Infantry and the United States Marine Corps.

Robb lives in Reno, Nevada with his wife

This is a podcast for all the creatives, for all the people who don’t think they are creative but wish they were, and for anyone who mistakenly believes that failing and falling hard on your ass is something you can’t recover from.

Have you ever met someone who just makes you want to smile? Have you come across one of those people whose passion and energy are simply contagious? Melissa Dinwiddie is one of them. It’s hard to slap a label on Melissa; actually we discuss that at the beginning of the podcast. She’s part coach, part muse, part creativity instigator, and part genius. I wanted to have her on the show because she is someone who is willing to share a story of hitting rock bottom, and she is also proof that it can lead you straight up. I also think her message about being ‘unperfect’, messy, and allowing yourself to flail (and fail) is extremely important in a culture where our carefully curated social personas paint an unrealistic version of the world: where every meal is beautiful, every picture is polished and all undertakings are flawless. Have fun listening to this one, …and when you’re done take 5 to get creative and maybe even share your venture with us at Life in Focus.

 

 

 

Take homes, highlights and soundbites:

* “When you feed your creative hunger, your life goes from black and white to full color” 

* Hitting rock bottom can happen to anyone. Often it’s a by product of not being who you are, not doing what’s right for you…

* … but, it’s also something you can come back from: better, stronger, wiser. “I was lucky enough to hit rock bottom”

* How do you find insight? What are ways you can check in with yourself when you don’t have a coach on hand? Melissa’s way has to do with being messy, creative, and unleashing your inner artist.

* “self awareness + self compassion = the key to everything good”

* Sometimes in order to find clarity you have to make messes.

 

 

Speaking of self -awareness, check out this awesome guide to writing your personal manifesto. Nothing is quite like defining what you stand for and who you are; it makes every decision, choice, and fork in the road easy to navigate.

More on Melissa –

Artist, Performer, Happiness Catalyst, Creativity Instigator.

I teach people like you to turn your creative taps to “on,” so you can live the kind of full-color life you long for.

I get you, because I’ve been there.

I’ve lived a very grey life for decades at a time. It took me a long time to embrace the labels “Creative” and “Artist,” but now I create  in a variety of expressions — visual art, writing, music, theater…

I’ve figured out how to get past the struggle and on with the joy, and I want to teach you what I’ve learned.

In the journey to the full-color, creative life I always hungered for, I’ve collected a whole cartload of tools that anyone can use to live their own full-color life, and I want to share them with you!

I share them on the blog, in my podcast, Live Creative Now!, and in my products and programs. And in my Insiders’ Newsletter, just for (wait for it…) insiders.

 

Have you ever wanted to be a fly on the wall and hear what others say when they think no one is listening? Well, Episode 20 of Life in Focus is just that, a recording of a conversation between Chris Browning and me; one we didn’t realize was being recorded at the time.

It all began pretty simply, we were talking about a realization I had about several of the Life in Focus followers, and what it means to be a millennial.

We eventually went into why that generation, Chris’ generation, sometimes has such a bad reputation of being narcissistic, entitled and slackers and we may or may not agree… you’ll have to listen to figure it out. Oh, and watch for the language, as I mentioned we didn’t realize the ‘tape’ was rolling initially.

For Christmas Chris and I would love a small gift, the gift of sharing! Share the podcast, subscribe, like and follow if you like it.

Talking Points:

* Millennials complain that they are the first generation to come out of school so incredibly in debt and with no job prospects – they might want to look at European youth who’ve been dealing with at least one of those problems for decades now!

* Millennials are perceived as narcissistic, entitles and lazy… it’s not their fault, really, blame the parents, blame the old guard!

* Maybe being a generation of dreamers isn’t such a bad thing, if you only knew how to channel that gift.

* Quarter-life crisis vs. mid-life crisis, one might be better than the other, both come down to having a clear sense of disconnect between how you’re living and what you want.

At the end of the day, you can say and think what you want about this generation, what I have come to realize is that many of the things we begrudge them might actually prove to be their greatest strengths in the long run. Several of our most recent (yet to be released) guests have been millennials. Between talking to them and working with many clients who fit the generational category I had an epiphany.  Now I am in the process of creating a new life of Life in Focus coaching program inspired by them.

 

 

Episode 19 of Life in Focus could have been intimidating. After all, I was interviewing Jimmy Moore of Livin’ La Vida Low-Carb, someone who has over 1,000 podcasts to his name!!!  With a thriving podcast and business Jimmy is a force to contend with in the health and nutrition world. Luckily for me, Jimmy is both down to earth, an approachable, regular guy, and,once you get to meet him, a bit of a goofball (super endearing). His story is well known in the Paleo – Keto – Low-Carb world, his weight-loss story at least. I wanted to hear about what came before all this.

Together Jimmy and I  we talked about how he found and pursued this passion, which roadblocks and diversions he faced, and what advice he has for those of us who also want to turn a passion into a profession.

*A few blunders– When I was recording this episode I preemptively announced that it would be #18, I was wrong. Also at some point I make the inexcusable mistake of saying “pursuing what’s right instead of what’s right for you” referring to right as what we want (oops, sigh and gasp!); blame it on early interview jitters.

 

Like what you hear? Like it (on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram), share it, and follow it!

Take Home

* Jimmy’s story starts off as one about food and how it can rule your life for worse, then eventually better; which is how you go from drinking 16 cans of soda a day to becoming an internatiinal speaker on weightloss and health.

* Like with most things – food, happiness, life – your frame of reference dictates your reality; broaden it and gain perspective, stick with only what you know and potentially live in a reality that is not objective.

* How do you deal with the haters, the trolls and the social media bullies? Get Jimmy’s advice about minute 30 or so in the podcast.

* If you really want something make it work, figure out what it takes, and move along with it, regardless of what comes in your way.

* Sometimes you can stumble onto what’s right for you. If you can recognize and run with it great things can happen, like living a life in focus. Don’t believe me? That’s how Livin’ La Via Low-Carb started.

* On why he decided to move forward and follow his passion full time: “I felt like I had so much to offer [and the people I was working for didn’t recognize that value].”

* “If you aren’t making mistakes, you’re not doing it right.”

MORE on MOORE

He is a blogger and author who is best known for his “Livin’ La Vida Low-Carb” books and blog. He has appeared on television and radio programs promoting a high-fat, moderate protein, low carb diet plan. Moore also runs a popular tri-weekly podcast that has run over 1000 episodes featuring interviews with experts in diet, health, and fitness. He currently resides in Spartanburg, South Carolina.

In January 2004, Jimmy made a decision to get rid of the weight that was literally killing him.

Episode 18 of Life in Focus brings some great insights about relationships and marriage (or monogamous committed relationships) with our guest, the first other therapist we have interviewed – Avrum Nadigel. Avrum is the author of recently released Learning To Commit, a book on commitment and marriage – for those who want it. Avrum is a licensed marriage and family therapist, which is to say he is an expert on relationships and how to make them or break them.

During our interview he skillfully evaded all debates about whether marriage was the way to go and instead focused on the value of commitmentfor those who want it. All I can say about this interview is that Chris, who has said that he has no interest in getting hitched, committed to reading Avrum’s book and thinking about his theories; an unforeseen turn of events if you ask me. What do you think about Avrum’s theories on marriage and commitment are they right-for-you?

 

Like the podcast? Subscribe, rate/review it on iTunes if that’s how you stream it and SHARE IT with the world!

What to expect:

* Even with relationships, there is a right for you. Married/committed monogamous, celibate, polyamorous, single… don’t let anyone else decide for you.

* “There is no such thing as my marriage is okay, but my relationship with my siblings is not okay.”  The relationships you have with your family directly influence the ones you’ll have with your partner.

* People put too much pressure on relationships, jobs, hobbies to be fulfilling at all times, which promotes disappointment, and possibly our soaring divorce rates.

* “All I try to do in my little way was write a book that I needed because I wanted to get married, and there are other people who want to get married.”

* “Marriage is the best institution to help us grow and become more loving people […] because marriage is hard.”

Is you current relationship right-for-you? Whether you are looking at a new relationship or trying to figure out your current one here is good check list of things to look for.

About Avrum:

 Avrum Nadigel is a marriage-and-family therapist, and author of Learning to Commit: The Best Time to Work on Your Marriage is When You’re Single.

He holds a Masters of Social Work from McGill University, a Bachelors of Commerce from Concordia University, and post-graduate training in Bowen Theory from the Western Pennsylvania Family Center.

Avrum blogs about commitment for Huffington Post, and co-produces “It’s the anxiety stupid!” a podcast about relationship angst. He also draws a comic about intimacy called “Ball and Change”.  Avrum has two decades of experience working in mental health, including past positions at CAMH, CMHA and Jewish Family Services. He works with singles, couples and families in his private practice.

Avrum is also a songwriter and musician. He co-composed the soundtrack for an award winning NFB documentary, and founded a music studio for at-risk youth, sponsored by Universal Music Canada. Avrum lives in Toronto with his wife and two sons.

 

More Avrum:

On the web