Life Well Lived.

Marriage is not a necessary end to courtship.In a good marriage,courtship continues.Your main goal during courtship should be to study each other,learn to know each other,grow together and protect each other. Absolutely! Listen and be enlightened.

Relationship only thrive when partners genuinely express their feelings in a matured,peaceful,and loving manner without feeling threatened in anyway. Here are four Gottman's relationship killers that can destroy a marriage or relationship if not handled with care.

Inorder to move forward in your relationship, you need to give up on resentment,bitterness,criticism,and unforgiveness. It is always a better option to face conficts head on,handle it maturedly and move on. You are to live in peace with the people in your life- not peace at any price,but peace brought about through gentle confrontation.

Before you can choose whom to marriage and before you can actually say that you have made the right choice,certain issues need to be resolved. Your decision must be tested,it must be subjected to examination and analysis to determine its quality,genuineness and alignment with God's word and purpose. Questions need to be asked and information obtained.

Your choices determine the outcome of your life.The same is applicable to marriage. You need information to be able to make the right choices. Considering your background differences is one major area you need to focus on extensively when planning to be engaged with someone else.

Once you recognize that you alone can change your behavior and not forcing others to change,then,it becomes easier to engage your spouse in the change process. Change is all you need inorder to have a healthy relationship.

Haste is often linked with some form of pressure. When a man and a woman have not taken time to know each other well enough during courtship,the result is a failed marriage,or at best a stormy marriage even when they stay together.After the euphoria of a short courtship that ends in a hasty marriage has worn off,reality and unpleasant revelations often sets in. You really need to take your time before embarking on any endavour in life.

It is important to understand the basic needs of your partner inorder to avoid misunderstandng misinterpreting of values. Knowing their needs will help you to know how best to serve them by improving on yourself daily.

A breakup is usually not a pleasant experience but if it must happen for the benefit of the parties concerned, then allow it. Do not force situations,with time solutions will emerge. A breakup is not the end of the world,it is the opening of a new chapter of your life,so do not be overwhelmed with the pain that it overrides your sense of good judgment.

Your life could be in one right spot if you are still nursing old negative beliefs. These beliefs most often times,keep you stuck and bitter. Until you alter your thinking and beliefs,nothing will ever change. It's time to have a paradigm shift.