We are now much more familiar with how learning differences manifest as children develop. Yet there is a considerable amount of damage done when adults fail to get curious about why students struggle to succeed or engage in traditional methods of learning. Cary, my friend and guest today endured many years of being misunderstood as a child with undiagnosed ADD.

Cary will share how these years in school confirmed messages of shame he believed from a young age and what it looked like to cope with this pain.

In this episode you'll learn

• Why the school setting highlights our weaknesses so easily and often
• Why Cary's home life complicated his performance at school
• How specific instances of public shame took root in his heart
• The reasons Cary learned to be hyperaware of what his classmates thought of him
• The moment that Cary realized many others had a brain as unique as his

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

So much of our childhood is spent in a school or educational setting. When we think back to these days, you may recall some of your best teachers and favorite ways to spend time with friends on the playground. Yet it is also a setting that is performance-focused, which naturally makes us vulnerable and produces feelings of shame.

In this episode, I'll share some of the many ways that we can wrestle with shame in a school setting. But then I will challenge you to identify where you felt shame about your own weaknesses so you can surrender the ache and impact of feeling less than among your peers.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why the school setting highlights our weaknesses so easily and often
• Examples of the many different skills we are expected to develop in school
• How adults in authority roles can emphasize parts of us we would like to hide
• Why shame surfaces in any school setting, whether it be public, private, or home school
• Ways to advocate and pray for young people who are struggling with shame at school

To find more resources about bullying and advocating for your child, check out the show notes on the website at www.louisesedgwick.com/podcast/89.

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

In this second conversation with Brian Dario, he will share with us how he pursued reconciliation with his step-dad as an adult. The transforming power of both offering and receiving forgiveness in this relationship brought about so much redemption. He will also share how meeting his biological father produced far more questions than answers for Brian.

Yet through the highs and lows of this journey, Brian has become more capable of trusting God for the needs that were never met in childhood. He was also overwhelmed by hope through the birth of his son as Brian has the chance to rewrite the narrative of what it means to be a man, and be loved unconditionally.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• What prompted Brian to ask for forgiveness even after his mom and stepdad's divorce
• Why meeting Brian's biological dad initially offered a sense of comfort
• Why the majority of Brian's questions for his dad will remain unanswered
• What role the story of the prodigal son has had on Brian's approach to parenting
• How Brian has learned to pivot away from shame spirals faster

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

So many of the negative messages we receive in childhood are implied rather than spoken aloud. But when they are sent again and again, especially from people who were designated to guide and nurture us, we can easily feel overwhelmed by shame.

In this episode, I am joined by my friend and pastor, Brian Dario. Brian will share how an absent biological father and stern stepfather made it confusing to understand where he belonged. He will share how well he used humor and athleticism to mask his insecurity about his height and misunderstood neurodivergence.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why Brian struggled to navigate how to interact with peers in a social setting
• Why it was so difficult to accept discipline from Brian's step-dad
• How Brian felt misunderstood and forced to self-advocate as a child
• Why healing has empowered him to release criticism with more grace
• The qualities of Jesus that Brian was drawn to as a child

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

In our first conversation with Jenny Scheid, we learned how shame can show up in how we think and feel about our bodies. As we dive deeper into this very pervasive challenge, Jenny will help us learn how to capture the lies that are fueling our shame and begin to practice honoring our bodies instead.

We will touch on what might hinder our healing journey in this area and examples of the specific exercises Jenny does in her work with clients as she helps them develop self-compassion and resilience.

In this episode you'll learn:

• Why comparison is such a mental trap and how to reframe it with a win-win mindset
• Why we have to learn to value an objective perspective
• Why it's important to acknowledge your feelings about your body
• Why we need to see our body parts in relationship to the whole body
• How to approach someone you love who is showing signs of struggling with an eating disorder

Connect with Jenny: www.liferenewedtherapy.com (Phoenix, AZ)

Links Mentioned

Dr. Kristen Neff

National Eating Disorder Association

The Waymaker by Ann Voskamp

Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

As broken people, sin impacts all parts of who we are created to be, and our physical bodies and how we see them is no exception. I've invited therapist, Jenny Scheid on the podcast to help us understand the ways grief can prevent us from believing how valuable our bodies are, regardless of how they "fall short" according to the world's elusive standard of beauty.

As Jenny specializes in treating clients who struggle with body image and eating disorders, she understands the tempatation to target our bodies in an attempt to regain control of areas of our lives that feel hopeless. She does an incredible job at reframing how we interpret what our bodies can do when we allow God to be the primary means through which we get our needs met.

In this episode you'll learn:

• Why your physical body is never the problem
• A practical definition of what it means to practice body acceptance
• Examples of how to respond when you feel overwhelmed by body shame
• They ways we can hide body shame behind the efforts to be healthier
• Why we need to cling to Scripture's promise that our bodies will be renewed

Connect with Jenny: www.liferenewedtherapy.com (Phoenix, AZ)

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

When you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror or in a group photo someone shared online, are you ever mentally snagged by critical thoughts? It's yet another element of our lives where shame can call the shots.

In this episode, I want to share with you some examples of how body shame can distort how we see ourselves, how we see others, and especially how we see God. God has absolutely wired us to appreciate beauty, but I want to challenge you with a deeper understanding of his intentions for doing so. I'll also share some ideas of how to ask God to release you from the trap of body shame and criticism when it surfaces.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• How sin fuels the lie behind every body shaming thought
• Why beauty is about God's glory at it's core
• How to run to God with your ungracious evaluations of yourself
• How to reframe your thinking by giving thanks for what your body can do
• Why refusing to believe God's opinion of us keeps us trapped in delusion

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

Taking the time to understand that your patterns of relating are dysfunctional is the step that sets our healing journey in motion. It can be both freeing and overwhelming to realize there are different and more productive ways of relating to those in our family now or in our family of origin.

But as Kaye and I talk about in this episode, there's a pretty big gap between what the average person sitting in the pews really needs in terms of support and what the local church usually provides. Kaye's got some great insights on why just knowing Christian doctrine isn't enough to handle the messy stuff in our relationships, and why knowing Jesus-is.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why many people find 12 Step groups more accessible than churches
• How your healing journey will naturally benefit those you love
• Why there is redemption in choosing health even when other family members won't
• Why the church as a body needs to examine its effectiveness in supporting families in crisis
• The freedom found in embracing our powerlessness over the actions of others
• How God used Kaye's vulnerability to invite her into an intimate relationship with Him

To register for the Healing Prayer Seminar in Phoenix on Saturday, April 13th, 2024, email Kaye Schneider at: [email protected]

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

Family systems are complex for so many reasons. We were designed with a need to belong in relationships where we can connect and express our needs and in turn, care for others, too. When this happens regularly, we have the chance to thrive in these relationships. This can lead to a lot of joy and fulfillment!

But when any family member finds themselves stuck in cycles of shame, that shame impacts the rest of the family. When our circumstances feel too chaotic, we turn to specific behaviors and strategies to try to find safety.

In this episode, Kaye Schneider, MATM, MAFS, DMin will share the different roles we adopt to cope with dysfunction. Kaye will share how God used the confusion of a devastating divorce to begin her journey of equipping families with tools for handling conflict and tension in relationships.

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why Kaye felt so blind-sighted by her divorce
• The key elements Kaye felt were missing from most discipleship resources
• A practical definition of dysfunctional behavior
• Why Kaye found freedom in a 12-Step program
• The abundance of hope in the scripture for how God can renew our minds and redeem our dysfunctional ways of relating to others

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.

Print and eBook are available now through the publisher here.

Regardless of how you were raised, one thing is for certain; there are no perfect families. Even those with "minimal baggage" still manage to leave relational wounds. Because we are all fallen, we are sinners, and as a result, we are all impacted by shame. In this episode, I'll share some common examples of what it looks like for family members to engage in the "shame-contempt dance" -a topic which earned a whole chapter in my book. I will also share how we can untangle ourselves from this exchange and communicate with kindness and boundaries. While we are not in control of how anyone in our family reacts to being hurt, we can practice naming our emotions and the effect a family member has on us. We can also commit to asking God to search our hearts for what we need to repent of and forgive.

• Why we have to acknowledge both intentional and unintentional relational hurt in families
• The danger of comparing your family to other families in your community
• Why a s desire for a problem-free home is unrealistic and a form of idolatry
• The reasons we care so deeply about how our family views us
• Why being committed to forgiving quickly is so powerful

Grab your copy of Lifted From Shame

Order your eBook or print book on Amazon here.