PTSD and CPTSD are common in survivors of narcissistic abuse and in their recovery. We find ourselves going into fight, flight, freeze or fawn. This is not helpful in parenting, let alone solo parenting with an ASD brain. It's also not helpful during the months leading up to a court hearing, and during the hearing itself. The nervous system has adapted to keep us safe, but once the chronic threat is gone, nervous system recovery means learning to let go of these maladaptive responses.So we look for trauma therapies for PTSD and CPTSD. Regular, "talk" therapy can be retraumatizing, whereas EMDR is a short, powerful, trauma-specific approach. EMDR is one of several options available to you to treat PTSD and CPTSD, so please do your own research and work with your therapist to see what's best for your specific situation. All I know is that EMDR is the one that treated my CPTSD.
In this Episode I explain what EMDR is, how it works, the difference between a traumatic memory and a bad memory, the timeline to clean out various traumatic memories, and I share a few heads up from my personal experience with EMDR.Please consider listening to this as well, Chronic Trauma and EMDR, to go deeper into EMDR and Trauma. In Episode 18 we will talk about 10 things that have dramatically changed in my life after I did EMDR, how it's helped me win in family court and better advocate for my child. Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court (starting with the "addiction to chaos" mini-series, Episode 15A to Episode 16B) is a Liberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any legal advice you obtain from your lawyer, or any advice coming from lived experience, about court prep, actually lands. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journey towards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself - the version that can actually win in court:

• First step is to not go back. I cover the Trauma Bond, a true addiction to chaos, in ⁠⁠⁠⁠Episode 15A⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠⁠⁠Episode15B⁠⁠⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Episode 16A⁠⁠, Episode 16B.

• You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD or CPTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD. For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18.

• You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development. Forgiveness is not reconciliation. That's Episode 19.

• The next things to think about in your liberation and in reclaiming your dignity, will be codependency, gratitude, fellowship & mentorship, surrender and grief.

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Follow the show so you can hear the entire Season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out ⁠⁠⁠Episode9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠⁠⁠⁠.Light in the Battle is where you come to think about how to heal from trauma, how to break the addiction to chaos, how to recover from narcissistic abuse, how to become the person you need to be in order to win a custody battle, and about nervous system recovery. This content is for general information and inspiration only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.Keywords: Domestic violence, trauma recovery, PTSD, chronic trauma, CPTSD, childhood trauma, trauma triggers, nervous system recovery, healing the nervous system after trauma, emotional detachment, EMDR,

This Episode I'm positioning as a transition between my long series about trauma recovery, the nervous system, and the addiction to chaos, and before I start rotating between more varied topics like family court, spiritual warfare, how the dog helps on a daily basis, etc.Maybe it's my autism but I feel the need to explain myself :) Why I'm here, whom I'm speaking to and what I can do for you. I'm Faustina, I'm a single mom on the spectrum raising a PDA child, healing from narcissistic abuse and winning in court despite confusing dynamics. I'm doing it all without a husband, without a safety net and I'm carrying 99% of the parenting load. Just me, my kid, my dog, and Jesus. If you also feel like there are no other spaces that talk about all of this stuff TOGETHER then I'm your girl. I am no longer in the thick of it, I went to EMDR therapy for PTSD, I did the work to soothe the nervous system, so I can speak clearly. But it's still fresh. I'm not speaking about topics that have been in the rear view mirror for many years. I am and always will be autistic, raising a PDA child, in a high-conflict coparenting dynamic, and leaning on God for my spiritual battle and the demonic aspects of dealing with narcissistic patterns of behaviour.

We now need to bring the cortisol, adrenaline, dopaminelevels back to normal. In this final episode about breaking the addiction to chaos, Faustina goes over 6 steps that worked for her, when she DECIDED to LEARN to enjoy peace. With compassion and understanding, with humour and Catholic faith, with small action steps that are easy to implement, shedescribes what has worked for her to bring the levels of the neurochemicals back to healthy levels. Chaos and danger are a true neurochemical addiction, andit's one Faustina was able to white knuckle by the grace of God and by inventing 6 steps for herself, based on her very basic understanding of things she found online. She goes over these steps as possible shortcuts in your recovery from narcissistic abuse, legal abuse, or any form of childhood trauma that may have wired your brain to crave chaos.
Autistic women are particularly prone to this addiction,because they have a craving for predictability, patterns, the type you see in the cycle of abuse... Women with ASD are often more vulnerable to harmful relational patterns and can get pulled into cycles of instability very easily. These 6 steps to break the addiction to chaos incorporate aCatholic interpretation of why that peace feels foreign, despite God’s promise, “My peace I give you”. We stress the importance of the Rosary, the Eucharist, and Confession, as rhythm and structure. You can pray novenas for peace,novenas for protection, sure, but you should also learn about the science of addiction!Season 2, Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court (starting with this "addiction to chaos"mini-series) is a Liberation Series that suggests things to look into as you rebuild yourself, so that you can become the version of yourself that is so detached emotionally, that you can prepare for family court correctly. Emotional detachment is where I want to help you get to, so that any thoughts I may have about court prep actually land. DETACH, BABY, DETACH!Here is the order I recommend for your healing journeytowards emotional freedom, as you work to become a new version of yourself - the version that can actually win in court:

• First step is to think about not going back. There's a true addiction to chaos:⁠⁠Episode 15A⁠⁠, ⁠⁠Episode15B⁠⁠, Episode 16A, Episode 16B.

• You then want to work with a therapist and see if you carry PTSD, and what types of therapy will help you heal the PTSD. For me, it was EMDR: Episode 17, Episode 18.

• You then want to see Forgiveness as a tactical advantage and as a massive step in your personal development. That's Episode 19.

• The next things to think about in your emotional detachment journey, will be codependency and gratitude.

Follow the show so you can hear the entire Season 2 about Emotional Detachment. While you wait for the entire season 2 to come out about Emotional Detachment as a Tactical Advantage for Family Court, check out ⁠⁠⁠⁠Episode 9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠.Light in the Battle is where you come to think about how toheal from trauma, how to break the addiction to chaos, how to recover from narcissistic abuse or legal trauma, and about nervous system recovery. This content is for general information and inspiration only. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional.Choose to find Light in the Battle. Your circumstances (yourASD diagnosis as an adult woman, your PDA child's nervous system, your high-conflict coparenting reality, and single motherhood) will not change any time soon, but the trauma neurochemistry and the harmful levels of the neurochemicals can. To go deeper into the neurochemistry behind stress, overwhelm, and emotional intensity, Huberman’s episode “⁠⁠Tools for Managing Stress & Anxiety⁠⁠” expands on the dopamine, cortisol, and survival-mode loops.

"Why didn't she leave", you ask. "Why does she keep dating the same types of men over and over? When will she learn? "Sounds familiar? Don't we just love that judgment coming from uneducated, well-meaning people who are not familiar with the concept of trauma bonding.
Well... It's biology. Childhood trauma and/or narcissistic abuse can create a true addiction in the brain. A trauma bond.
This Episode is the logical next step in our Chaos Addiction Mini-Series, after Episode 15 A and Episode 15B, where we talked about how things feel and how we suffer from the boredom and the deafening silence that follow years of running on adrenaline, oxytocin and cortisol - but precisely, we didn't dive into the brain chemicals and the biology of addiction to chaos.
Here, Faustina goes over:

• the various stress hormones involved in abusive relationships, (cortisol, adrenaline, dopamine and oxytocin)
• what that addiction may look like for autistic women,
• the unfortunate rewiring of the brain that makes it challenging for a narcissistic abuse survivor to settle away from chaos,
• how it feels when you really really want to get out but can't seem to,
• how that wiring can be healed, even when it comes from childhood,
• very concrete, ASD-friendly, actionable choices survivors on the spectrum can make to get those hormone levels back to normal, and build bridges away from chaos and towards peace.

Please leave this show a 5* review.In 16B we will talk about concrete steps to normalize the levels of the neurochemicals we described here.
More here about ⁠Trauma Bond Science⁠ with Darlene Lancer.Light in the Battle is where you come to think about how to heal from trauma, how to break the addiction to chaos, how to recover from narcissistic abuse and about nervous system recovery. This content is for general information and inspiration only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health,legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.

"Why does this keep happening to me?" "Why do I keep attracting narcissists?" You choose to stop. With 6 ASD-friendly practical tips that Faustina used repeatedly in her journey of taming peace after years of running on adrenaline and cortisol, we can slowly familiarize ourselves with our new life. Whether that's getting out of domestic violence, healing from narcissistic abuse, or winning a custody battle in family court, there's going to be a point where things will stop being a constant threat, a constant chaos loop. And your brain won't like it. So here are 6 trauma informed, practical ways that you teach your brain to enjoy the quiet after the storm, so you can settle into it, and change the course of your life - one day at a time!Addiction to chaos is a real thing. In this episode we get practical with 6 mindset shifts and day-to-day habits that may help us not dive head first into another problem, another abusive relationship, another overwhelming situation. In the next episode we nerd out on the hormones in the brain that drive that addiction, and how we can help normalize those hormone levels. I want to point you to one of my biggest pillars in my trauma recovery, Dr. Ramani, who teaches from a more authoritative perspective, things you need to know about narcissism, NPD, and about recovery. The content in this podcast is for general information and education only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.

Through the story of winning a custody battle, despite what felt like years of legal intimidation and harassment, Faustina shows an example of what addiction to chaos looks and feels like. Winning in family court after many years of feeling unseen and misunderstood by a legal system that isn’t trauma-informed, completely stunned her and left her like a deer in the headlights.We discuss the fact that calm can feel threatening, that trauma wires your nervous system to seek more chaos, why peace showing up abruptly can be destabilizing, in order to plant the scenery for Episode 15-B where we will list 6 practical Tips to retrain the body to feel safe again. This first episode of a 4-parts series about the addiction to chaos for trauma survivors, sets the stage with a story that describes Faustina's journey from fear and chaos over to peace, which was not void of struggles and discomfort through the process.It took months to adjust to the fact that the long-term trajectory of the case had shifted entirely, along with the power dynamic, and to adjust to everything being rebalanced in her and her kid's life. This new reality created a huge void, as a huge part of her identity was taken away abruptly.A story most single moms who have left relationships that felt intimidating, disrespectful and confusing, and who are carrying relationship or childhood trauma, and suddenly find themselves forced to adjust to some level of peace, will relate to. While I'm hoping this helps you save time for the day you do win in family court, and most importantly, for the months that will follow, the emotions and feelings described here can apply to a LOT of situations. Here we're just setting the stage for the mini-series. Faustina suggests we start thinking about surrender with the words, "Be still and know that I am God" as a great mantra for the transition out of chaos and into peace. Surrender is one of the mindset shifts that she built her newfound freedom around.After this practical description of behaviors and feelings, in Episodes 16A and 16B we then dive into the neurochemical aspect of the addiction to chaos, talk about the stress hormones, and Faustina will explain her personal journey of overcoming the addiction to chaos from a stress hormone perspective. We will talk about family court strategies later in the podcast, not to worry. It's just an example to talk about navigating from being knee-deep in chaos, to embracing and loving a more quiet life.
If you're waiting for the rest of the series on addiction to chaos to come out, in the meantime, check out Episode 9: The Court Date you Can't Stop Thinking About - Breaking the Anxiety Spiral⁠.
KEYWORDSautistic single mom, narcissistic abuse recovery, trauma healing, nervous system regulation, custody battle, chaos addiction, addiction to chaos, life transition, NPD, ASD, Catholicism, court trauma, court battle, win a custody battle, post-abuse healing, trauma responses, high-conflict co-parenting, healing after abuse, emotional safety, breaking trauma patterns, Mental Health, Parenting, Self-Improvement, Trauma, Catholic Faith, Rosary, Jesus, spiritual warfare, demonic aspect of a court battle, legal abuseThis content is for general information and education only. It reflects lived experience and summaries of publicly available research. It is not medical, mental‑health, legal, or professional advice, and it isn’t a substitute for advice tailored to your situation. Please seek support from a qualified professional who understands your needs.

After gaslighting, rebuilding your intuition and body signals is the foundation for helping your child feel emotionally safe. In this episode, we talk about what gaslighting is, how to heal from gaslighting, staying honest with your overwhelm, and modeling emotional safety for sensitive or neurodivergent kids. Faustina shares relatable, personal stories and real-life examples of learning to feel the emotions again, and humbly using those to model emotional intelligence to a sensitive child. If this helped you feel less alone, please leave a 5 star review — it genuinely helps other overwhelmed moms find this space. Healing from gaslighting is like finding strength in the storm that follows, with the post-separation dysfunctional dynamics that come after you leave.

• emotional safety for kids
• trauma-informed parenting
• parenting after abuse
• overwhelmed moms
• neurodivergent parenting
• PDA autism parenting
• sensitive children
• co-regulation strategies

• healing from gaslighting
• nervous system regulation
• parenting when triggered
• rebuilding intuition
• overwhelmed mom support
• Catholic mom podcast
• mother wound healing
• emotional literacy for kids
• parenting through dysregulation

• gentle parenting for trauma survivors
• raising autistic or PDA children
• how to stay calm with your child
• healing your inner voice
• teaching kids emotional regulation

Staying present isn’t easy when your nervous system is already overloaded. It's easier to dissociate.In this episode, Faustina talks about what “being present” actually means for trauma survivors and neurodivergent single parents, why overwhelm shuts down connection, and how to stay grounded with an autistic child even when your body or your mind want to escape. Practical, realistic tools for single moms — no perfection required. I do want to give credit to a major player in the ASD space, Orion Kelly, That Autistic Guy, who talks about parallel play.
Keywords: autism parenting, overstimulated parent, overwhelmed mom, trauma informed parenting, sensory overload parenting, parenting with PTSD, staying present with child, single parent, neurodivergent parent, autistic parent, PDA autism parenting, nervous system dysregulation

Breaking generational trauma for future generations is hard — especially when you’re parenting a neurodivergent child without a roadmap. It's little things you have to notice, to catch, and to do differently - one day at a time.In this episode, we talk about how childhood trauma shows up in your parenting, why your nervous system reacts before your thoughts do, and how small, imperfect moments of awareness can break the cycle. Generational trauma doesn't have to be passed down to your bloodline, you can stop the cycle. This is for single moms recovering from abuse, healing, and trying to parent differently than what they lived.Pro tip: going to therapy is always a good idea!

• breaking generational trauma
• parenting after trauma
• trauma-informed parenting
• cycle breaking parents
• parenting a neurodivergent child
• parenting autistic child
• autism parenting support
• PDA autism parenting
• healing from abuse
• moms recovering from trauma

• overwhelmed moms
• trauma triggers in parenting
• nervous system dysregulation
• gentle parenting after trauma
• attachment repair
• reparenting yourself
• parent burnout recovery
• high conflict co-parenting support
• healing childhood wounds
• trauma response in motherhood

• how to parent differently after trauma
• why parenting feels hard after abuse
• how to break generational trauma cycles
• regulating yourself while parenting
• support for moms raising autistic kids
• trauma responses during meltdowns
• parenting when overstimulated
• surviving high conflict parenting

How do you help your child calm down when you’re not calm yourself?
In this episode, Faustina shares small, realistic ways to co-regulate while healing — grounding tips for overstimulation, honest scripts for connection, and a reminder that repair matters more than perfection. This can be particularly difficult for single mothers as there is no other adult to fall back on when we are not regulated.
single parenting, autism, trauma recovery, nervous system, co-regulation, single motherhood, resilience, gentle parenting, healing hacks