For David’s fortieth birthday, he and his wife Katie went to Mexico to swim with the whale sharks, soak in the rich Mexican culture and food like pizza and chicken fingers, and lay on the beach to relax without the kid. Things were not as advertised.

Plus six items of homework for you to do as you seethe in jealousy at the success of other people and think about writing a show to insult them repeatedly but realize it’s all due to your easily bruised ego.