I’m sure you know people that have not changed, People tend to get caught at certain times of their lives. Do you know a person who peaked in high school? Maybe you keep thinking about the one who got away and how your life would be different with them? For some of our Vets they peaked in the service. Many of my Marine Brothers and Sisters are stuck in the time they served. Many of them want to change the fact that they lived when someone else didn't. They want to go back. They cannot leave where they were. But for reasons, maybe only they know about, they don’t move on. They struggle to live. I know so many of them that have not been able to move past the horrible situation they went through. Do you know someone that can’t move past something that happened years ago to them? Maybe when they were a youth. If you say “NO” look again.  Maybe even try the mirror. Some of us are more stuck than others. 

When was the last time you dwelt on the past? Was it five mins ago or 40 years? The time you were dwelling on was it five mins ago or 40 years? Does it matter? When you think about the past does it include the ups and downs of that time or just the ups. One of the men that I look up to is Travis Mills. He is a ground pounder “Army” who lost all four limbs in a bombing in Afghanistan. He said I don’t think my problems outweigh anybody else’s” then he goes on to say “ don’t dwell on the past. I learned that because when I was sitting in my hospital bed closing my eyes and wishing that this did not happen, I realized you're not going to change the past” Dwelling on the past is hoping against hope and wishing that your past would have been different. Just like Travis couldn’t get his arms and legs back you cannot get back the life that you had. If you don’t leave your past in the past, it will destroy your future. Live for what today has to offer, not for what yesterday has taken away. So get out of the past. If you look at it truthfully you probably weren't without problems when you were there. Life is tough from day 1 until the day after you are gone.

Maybe the time you want to return to things were great and there was nothing bad about the time. Maybe the time was truly magical. Even if that were the case living there will make you miserable. The present is the only time that we actually have. Elon Musk and  every other inventor out there has yet to build a working prototype of a time machine. In this life we can go neither forward or back; “Time is the reef upon which all our frail mystic ships are wrecked.” Noel Coward. Now is the only thing we have and if we spend it in the past we feel regret and depression.

How do you get to the point of letting go of the past? How do you live in the present? What ways will get you out of the past?

First off be honest, with yourself and about yourself. What do you have? Are you thinking of the past or are you living in it? If you are living there, change your story. It is what creates who you are. But if you are honest with yourself even if it was the best of times, Even if it was an easier time, you would not be who you are. Be honest about who you are and what you have accomplished.

Second is acknowledge that there are things out of your control. Maybe it wasn’t you who moved you away from that “perfect time.” It might have been that the thing that took your perfect time was a situation. Learn from the experience. Become better from those things you can control.

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