I want to thank all my listeners! Each one of you whether you listened to 1 podcast or 245.  You mean a lot to me. I hope this podcast blessed your life!

All right my friends well, today we are going to discuss the future. We're going to be talking about the future of “Your Amazing Life and you know I am really grateful to all of you who have been here and listen to me and follow me and it's been an amazing process. I really enjoyed it! Things are going to be changing in the future I'm working on a few different things that are going to be in place of the “Your Amazing Life” podcast coming out I have twice a week. I will be sure to keep you updated on those as they become closer. But for right now I'm going to be not doing that “Your Amazing Life” podcast. It's been a great run; I've been doing that for a year and a half now. It has not I've done the things that I was hoping it would do so I'm going to change up and see if I can move my business forward in a different way. But I am so grateful to each of you who have listened to me, each of you that are here today. I hope that you got a lot from the things that I talked about. I mean that that's the whole point of it was to help you change your life and increase the success that you have in your life. Hopefully, it brought you some happiness. I am always open to talk with people and go over exactly what you want so that you can be happy. I'd really love to discuss that with you and see how I can be part of that process for you. Hopefully, I have done that in this program. The goal was to create some happiness in your life, giving you some tools that you could use to make a difference. I am so grateful for all of the support that I get! I did also want to publicly thank my beautiful wife Evelyn for all the support that she's given me. She is amazing support; I mean she is just been there for me. She is gone above and beyond and I love her so much. I'm so grateful for all she’s done I couldn't have done this much without her. I am really thankful for the opportunity the podcast has given me. I'm grateful I’ve had to serve over the last year and a half in this way. I’m going to be looking for other ways to serve and ways that we might reach a few more people. I have learned so much and getting these podcasts ready for you and I really appreciate the opportunity to be part of your life. You know the more that I learn about this world and how it works the happier I am and the more successful I become. I've been reading the book Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki. I've been learning so much for that right now there is a big huge to buy between “The Haves” and “Have Nots” one of the biggest in recent histories at least. The gulf is just getting bigger and there are all sorts of ideas on how to change that out there. Some of the ideas are being tried, others are not.

Check out the podcast for the rest of the story.

So, what does it take to become a Jedi? You have a specific story that only you can share with and change the world. How do you get your story out there? You are unique. There is something different about each of you. If you are in your power “resistance is futile” But if you are not there, how do you get there? How do you get your story out there? What is it you are here to share with the world?

Number 1: I hope each one of you realizes that you are here on a mission. There is a higher purpose to you and your life. There are so many things that your mission can be about. Maybe it is getting others to enjoy life. If your life is stressful, meaningless, and uninspiring then you have not found your purpose. You were not born to survive this life. Remember the poem Our Greatest Fear by Marianne Williamson 

Number 2: Some will, some won’t, Who's next? Your mission will speak to some but not to others. Don’t let those that don’t see it get you down. Move on! Do not let them stop you because they can’t see your vision. Be persistent. Keep trying! As you continue to try you will find those that want to hear your story.

Number 3: Know that you have value. Realize your true worth. Know what you have to offer others. Look at the things that you have accomplished. See what you are good at. Get to know yourself for who you are. We do not need to compare how we have done as opposed to others just in comparison to ourselves. You are great not because you are better than others. You are great because of who you are and what you do?

Number 4: Realize you are a leader. Speak out, what you are here to share. Make sure that you share your story with others. Realize the success you have created from the experiences that you have had over your lifetime. You are a leader because you are bent on improving yourself and your life. You are a leader to children, neighbors, coworkers, If you look at your light you will find ways that you are a leader. Those of you who think that you are not a leader, do you fear the light you have that people might follow.  As a leader realize you are human. You are not perfect nor do you know all the right answers. As a leader, you should be able to find answers in others.

If you are tired of suffering, beating up on yourself, do you feel powerless, uninspired, and stressed; If you want to struggle less and enjoy more. If you want a truly amazing life that is connected and complete, you need the “You Have Value” program. If you are willing to make some changes, if you think you may be a fit for the “You Have Value" program let’s talk.  Contact me, [email protected] or 801-449-0750

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We have Beth Crosby who says “Your story is your strength” she is a writing coach who helps entrepreneurial women comfortably write about what makes them the ideal fit for their clients.  Now, Beth joins me today to discuss the difficulties, blessings, and gratitude that kidney failure presented to her. From the smaller stories that comprise her life story, she learned to be grateful for the blessings of dialysis and 2 kidney transplants. Welcome, Beth, in one of your posts on LinkedIn you said “We become who we are because of experience” So what experience had a large part to play in you becoming who you are?

Beth: Probably the biggest influence or experience, when I was a child, was my fathers’ mom. She lived across the street from us and she retired from her nursing job right after I was born. She kept me and taught me grammar and to love to read. She is the one that got me through third-grade multiplication tables. But the experience of having a grandparent… My grandfather died when I was young. So, the experience of having a grandparent who had the understanding of the importance of education but also the importance of getting outside and playing in the sunshine really was critical in developing who I became.

Ken: Okay Now, you help women to write and share their stories. What is the importance of our stories?

Beth: They show who we are and help us to get to know each other better. So, a quick example of that would be; I have a motorcycle, my dad had a Harley Davidson, my uncles had Harley-Davidsons. I was three I had the smallest helmet and so I rode on Harley-Davidsons with them. I always wanted a Harley cuz I thought I was just one of the guys. That helps me to relate to men. I was in a networking group and I meet a guy and we started talking about motorcycles. I don’t remember if he had on a motorcycle shirt or what. Another gentleman I knew passed by and I said “hey come here” you need to meet so and so. He rides Harleys too. So, I had two or three sentences of conversation with them and then I left them to talk and I left the conversation. So even when we are networking for business those stories are what help us relate.

Listen to the rest of the podcast to find out what blessings came from it. Beth also talks about how only when we accept our past and take hold of our experience do, we claim our power.

What is the best way for folks to connect with you?

BethACrosby.com

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There is the story of a man with a very stubborn mule who needed to get the mule to move. The mule was content to be where he was and didn’t want to put n the effort to walk and pull the man’s cart. So, they sat there, neither got what they wanted. But then the man had an idea. He went a got a long stick string and a favorite treat of the mule. He tied the carrot to the stick and dangled it out just in front of the mule. The mule moved to get to the carrot. There are many carrots in my life, and if you look closely, you will find them in your life also. Maybe you get them from work where if you hit a certain number, you get a bonus, party, or meal. The number could be for many things number of days without injuries, the number of sales. In fact, getting a job is a carrot and stick. You met this person they offered you cash if you would come in and do certain things and be present between certain hours and on certain days. This is a viable way of changing behavior. It has been around forever because it works to a certain extent.

But there are a few requirements to get it to work, the carrot has to be something that means enough to the person for them to do it. If your boss said they wanted you to come in and work and you would be paid $1.00 that probably would not motivate you to come in. If you told your child, you wanted them to spend an hour in the sun weeding for that popsicle, they might not do it. Everyone who has a job and gets paid for it likes this type of motivation. Money is used as a carrot so often that it can be overdone right. Money is an easy thing to come up with and it motivates so many people. In fact, it is usually about what number of bills motivates them, not a question of will they be motivated by it.

So, I hope we now agree, you are motivated by money. You show up at a business listen to what others want, produce what they asked, and then you receive nothing more than a few sheets of high-quality paper with some ink on it, for doing so. If you do a good job then they dangle the possibility in front of you that they will give you more sheets of paper. Maybe they will give you more responsibility and work and then you get more sheets of paper.

Why do we allow money to be a motivating factor? The first one we already mentioned is it is easy to do. Most of us have fear of the stick (homeless) and a desire for the carrot (things money will buy). Another reason is that we don’t know what other likes and dislikes we have. According to the numbers, there is no correlation between personal engagement and salary. People making $500,000s per year dislike their jobs as much as those making $24,000. Money does motivate, but the problem is it only moves us so far. It gets you to show up. It gets you through what is required. But it doesn’t get you to enjoy it. It doesn’t get you to learn, or to become. Once you have the needs for you and your family met the psychological benefits of money drop. Arnold Schwarzenegger said it best “Money doesn’t make you happy. I now have $50 million but I was just as happy when I had $48 million.” Money is nothing more than a concept or symbol to facilitate trade. We as people project our own attitudes and tendencies towards it. We project definitions to it.

Please subscribe to this podcast and leave a rating and review, to help others find this podcast. Also, join the Facebook group. Here is the spot to click and set up a time so we can discuss how you can use these tools and others to get your amazing life!

Ken: We have Dr. Tracey Jones who is an author, speaker, veteran, publisher, podcaster, and international leadership expert, who currently serves as President of Tremendous Leadership. She is a graduate of the United States Air Force Academy, a decorated veteran who served in the First Gulf War and Bosnian War. Tracey is the author of ten titles, one of them the book SPARK: was an Amazon #1 new release. Now, Tracy, you have been reading personal development books most of your life. What kind of difference do you think that made in your life?

Tracy: It made all the difference in the world can and I have to tell you I joked that my father was up a “book a-holic” and a he was a book pusher. Flunked out of school in the 8th grade. Mother left him, abuse, came out of the depression era born in the South. Everything was against my father, but Charlie Tremendous Jones famously said, this when I was a young girl, “That you're going to be the same person that you are today from 5 years ago except for two things the people you meet and the books you read. He was the living embodiment of that. So, I tell people I read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” before the “Poky Little Puppy” He was very much, you're going to read, you're going to read good content, and you're going to fill your brain with great stuff. Cause trash in, trash out; good in and good out.

Tracy: …. you know what I did? I went back to school. Cuz, I thought I can’t interact with people right now. I've got to get in my headspace, that's why I went back for my Ph.D. It was the best thing I could have done. I had to get out of my own way and I had to relearn my horrible habits and get on the path. I could see other people on the path, why can't I be on the path? I know I get on the path but I've got to do the work. So I read a book called “The Power of the Other” by Doctor Henry Cloud. He's one of my favorite authors; He saves people. Books like “Necessary Endings” and “Boundaries.” I mean “Necessary Endings” I give that to everyone and they're like “thank you so much for giving me that.” Because there is so much that out there; I'm sorry folks this is not Utopia we live in a fallen world. You put up the boundaries and you only allow in the good, that's not selfish that's the way it needs to be!

Check out the rest of the podcast to hear her talk about:

How depression affected her and how she would sleep 15 hours a day.

Anxiety kills more people on the planet.

Get the right mindset.

Finding advocates and what an advocate is.

What is the best way for folks to connect with you?

www.traceycjones.com

www.tremendousleadership.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/drtraceycjones/

Facebook: Tremendous Tracey and Tremendous Leadership

Twitter: TraceyCJones

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/Tremendousleadership

Please subscribe to this podcast and leave a rating and review, to help others find this podcast. Also, join the Facebook group. Here is the spot to click and set up a time so we can discuss how you can use these tools and others to get your amazing life!

Many of you have or will go through a divorce. How did that affect your life? How did it affect your confidence? So I was once told; you should only get divorced when the pain of being together is greater than the pain of divorce. There will be pain either way. I know a lot of my listeners have had to deal with this. Many of the people I coach have also. Some of them have deal with abusive spouses. Some have been gaslighted, treated with verbal and physical abuse, others have been in toxic relationships. Each of them got to the point the pain of being together was greater than the pain of getting divorced. Every one of you that has been through, or have at some point been thinking about divorce has some reasons for it right? How does thinking about divorce leave you feeling? Do you feel like you are a failure or broken? Maybe you feel triumphant or released of a burden. What about feeling some guilt? There are many things you can feel and all of them are correct. But it is important to process each of those emotions. If you don’t move past those it is likely to become an issue for you again.

Many of you may be looking to survive the divorce. You just want past the feelings of anger, hurt, confusion, depression, and pain, right? At some point, you had positive feelings for this other person you even said you loved them, right? So, there will be a loss that you will go through. Maybe the divorce was last month maybe it was 10 years ago. It is still possible that you look back fondly on the marriage or maybe feel regret. There were both good and bad times in the marriage, right? It is normal to remember both of those at different times. It is best to take adequate time and be honest, reflect on your feelings, process those emotions. This can be done by talking with someone that can help you walk through what you are experiencing. Walking through this with you can make a huge difference in your life and prepare you for a much better life and relationship going forward. Maybe you have developed new structures. Hopefully, you have looked over the feelings and done the soul searching to find out what is important to you. I talked with a friend and we were looking over the list that they had created on what the ideal relationship would look like. What was important to them. That is making a huge difference in their lives and helping them through the divorce.

So, how do you make it through all these emotions? First, know that there are 6 emotional stages that you will most likely go through.

Some people move from one relationship to the next and find themselves in a similar situation each time. The players change but the rules stay the same. This is because they didn’t do the self-work so that they could move to a healthier relationship.

In case you are not sure there is life after divorce. You can have more than you dreamed of and have the life you wanted. All of this is possible. You can make these changes by asking these questions of yourself, to figure out what you want. Knowing and loving yourself is key to any happy healthy relationship. You must first have a quality relationship with yourself. I can help you with tools and tricks to learn about and develop a greater love for yourself.

Please subscribe to this podcast and leave a rating and review, to help others find this podcast. Also, join the Facebook group. Here is the spot to click and set up a time so we can discuss how you can use these tools and others to get your amazing life!

Ken: Jason Holzer is a certified teacher and thought coach, accomplished basketball coach, and elite skills trainer. He is also an Amazon Best Selling author, post-Traumatic growth storyteller, and the Co-Founder of 4D Athletes. Welcome, Jason.

Jason: Howdy Ken thanks for having me on the show today. I appreciate it.

Ken: You're welcome. All right so how did you come to write the book? How did it come into being?

Jason: Well, you know I did basketball camps for a long time. So, I traveled across the US. I went to a lot of places some were small enough to drive through. I was driving to eastern Ohio, almost like the border of Pennsylvania. I like to drive without any radio on sometimes just in pure silence. I have two kids I’m a teacher, so there is always a lot of noise. So sometimes it is just nice to be where there is nothing going on. I’m a man of faith and I believe in spirituality. As I was in that quiet place and just being. The word “write” came into my mind. I was unsure of how to process that. I got home and that thought kept nagging at me “write” I was like “huh, Okay.” I told my wife, “I think I’m supposed to write a book.” She was like “you are? about what?” I think God is asking me to write a book about losing my dad to suicide. My wife said really do you know how to do that? I told her I had no clue. I went to college to become a physical education teacher. I work in sports. Nothing in my degree says creative writing or anything like that. A long story short about 18 months later, I ended up; I wrote a book about my story of losing my dad to suicide when I was 17 years old. but I didn't want to just be that, of the loss, I wanted to be a crescendo of, hey how do I get over being left behind. You can still have a great life despite what happened to you.

Ken: Okay so tell us more about the book

Jason: Yeah, sure it’s a first-person narrative of what I went through. So that when you read it you feel like you are in my shoes. Everybody processes grief and loss differently. but I wanted to give people an experience of what I personally went through. Knowing that hopefully, people will feel similar things. Everyone’s experiences will be different but sometimes emotions can be relatable. That was my goal. But then the second part of that I talked about things like self-love, things like building great habits, Things like forgiveness, and how to heal yourself. how would I heal myself from the trauma in order to find my identity? So that I could find my vision in order to let go of these negative emotions of anger, resentment, these were things that I harbored inside. To be able to move on. To learn how to get past some of the most difficult times in your life. To see a positive, optimistic future and believe that things will get better. I will be able to smile again, there is a rainbow at the end of the storm. So, the second part of that is the healing piece of it.

Listen to the podcast to hear the whole interview.

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Václav Havel played a major role in the Velvet Revolution, which was a non-violent transition from the Communist Party of Czechoslovakia to a parliamentary republic. He had a philosophy that included things like anti-consumerism, humanitarianism, and environmentalism. What if we could follow in his footsteps and create changes without violence. What if our philosophy included anti-consumerism, humanitarianism, and environmentalism? How many of us can create change within ourselves without violence? I know I have been caught up in what I want to buy next. How is it that these play in our lives?  What is the importance of each?

What part does consumption play in our lives? I mean for a few people it is out of control that is why there are shows about hoarders, right? But what about the rest of us? Well let’s look at the definition of consuming; Absorbing, devouring, eating up, depleting. Everything that we buy has many costs associated with them. The opportunity cost. The cost of buying it, as well as the cost of getting rid of it and many others. But marketing has been able to use our minds against us. Turning tools that were created to build the human race and instead of using these tools to get us to buy things we don’t need.

Next, humanitarianism; here is an idea whose time has come. It is past time that we started treating each other as Brothers and Sisters. We need to value the life of each and every person despite our differences. Treat others with benevolence and provide assistance. The price that we will be paid for this will be large enough to change this world. We would provide food for those with none, provide aid to those in need. Can you imagine a world where the majority of us acted like; Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, Martin Luther King, or Oskar Schindler. What could we provide? What would this world looked like if everyone’s needs were meet?

What is the importance of environmentalism? Well, I am defining environmentalism as concern about the earth and taking action aimed at protecting it. Now we can have disagreements about how to protect this earth and that is okay. It doesn’t matter that we agree on how to protect the earth just that we all work towards that end. Today we take loans out on the environment. Loans that we will be paying interest on for the next few generations. That can only go on for so long. At some point, the interest we pay will outweigh the ability to produce.

We as fellow travelers on this earth are here and we are in this together. We are supposed to work together to make this experience move forward together. We only have this one Earth and even when we move to the stars this is still our home and it is part of us and needs care. Working together we can reduce the footprint we make and move out the survivability rate of this planet farther. We can and must work as a team. We must work for the same things and see ourselves as one. We must become one race the Human race. We must work from that viewpoint to make the changes in the world that will provide for generations.

Each of you has the power and ability to make a huge change in this world. Each of you can make a difference. Each of our communities needs someone to reach out and make a difference. As we make a difference in our neighborhoods, our neighborhoods will make a difference in our cities, as our cities change, they will change our states. This will work out until we change the world.

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Christopher Salem: He was given a year and a half to live. He ended up dying 4 months into his diagnosis. I remember the day before he died. I remember him looking over at me and he couldn't talk but his eyes were somewhat open. It was like he wasn't really there. But yet in a way, he was it was just in a different way. It was like him communicating to me saying listen. I apologize I wasn't the dad that you were looking for or expected. I did my best; I could only give what I knew.  

Jacquelyn Phillips: The most painful was having to become clean. I was really good at lying and you can only lie for so long, eventually, you get caught up in it. So, breaking the habit of lying and not embellishing that was really hard to do. As far as the most uncomfortable it was falling in love with myself. Because for the longest time it felt really hokey. I would say “I love myself” but that just sounds really dumb. But you have to! You have to love the person that you are. Because if you, don't you can't love anything else fully because you are holding back. Life is much more freeing if you have love in your heart!

Kim Knavel: It's... I used to not think there was anything I could do about the way I felt. I would get depressed, sometimes it was situational sometimes it wasn't. I do have clinical depression also and when it was situational... I couldn’t make it go away, when it was just because I was depressed, I couldn't make it go away. I always felt like everything else was controlling me. The people around me, my emotions, everything. I like not... I like not being controlled. I like being able to say “I can sit with you for a few days and I can look at these depressive feelings and I can see where they're coming from.” I don't have to judge them and they can make me sad for a minute but I'm not going to be buried in them.

Rich Cardone: I believe work-life balance is a complete myth. I believe it the state of mind because you can't achieve it. It is not a destination, you can achieve, it's just a state of mind. you either feel bad that you're giving work your all; or that when you're with your family you're giving your family our all, or whatever that may be. But it is not something that you can achieve, so you know the key to having an amazing life is balance.

Isabel Chiara: Number one would to really look at your life as it happened for you! Anything that happened in your life happened because we all have those stories that are sitting in our brain just keeps going over them. Maybe it was what we consider a failure, it could have been the worst thing that ever happened to us. But it happened so there is something about that thing that happened. Maybe it happened to move us in another direction. I always think that life happening for me right now. The second part of that is, that we don't know the rest of the story, right?

Justin Springer: We always, as hard times come, we feel like we must be going the wrong way you know. I know we talked about a lot, I'm sure you do with mindset, With like “flow states” and all that stuff. That could be another discussion, but what I think is sometimes the hardship is we need to embrace a little bit more.

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“It wasn’t so much that he minded telling Leslie that he was afraid to go; it was that he minded being afraid. It was as though he had been made with a great piece missing… Lord, it would be better to be born without an arm than to go through life with no guts.” Katherine Paterson Author of the book “Bridge to Terabithia” Have you ever thought you were born without guts? Kellie Hall 1st runner up at MISS CALIFORNIA and Navy Lieutenant said “I don’t think we’re born with insecurities; I think the world introduces them to us.”

There are negative influences and stigmas everywhere. They are increasing day by day. In UConn Today they posted “Decades of research confirm the presence of weight stigma in workplaces, schools, health care settings, public accommodations, and the mass media, as well as in close interpersonal relationships with friends and families. It’s everywhere.” Then we also struggle with stigmas around Mental health this stigma is a problem for young people as well as those in certain jobs, like police, firefighters, and those in military service. Why is it that we as people look at going to the DR.? for a checkup or visit is, okay?

Then there is the 3ft giant. Sean Stevenson, Sean was an expert in the field of hypnotherapy. Because of a genetic disorder he only grew to 3 ft tall and was in a wheelchair his entire life. Because of the “brittle bone disease,” he had more than 280 fractured bones and dozens of other medical complications that threatened his life and he was in pain often. But in March 2004 he started work on a Doctor of Clinical Hypnotherapy Degree. Now if you had been born with this genetic disorder would you have felt insecure? Sean developed a powerful self-image and a rock-solid Identity. Sean knew that it is your identity that gets you what you want out of life. If your goals and your identity do not match up; it is your identity that will be the deciding factor, not your dreams. If you are feeling insecure congrats you are part of the human race. There are things you can do to reduce your insecurities.

Identity is exclusively self-determined. This means it is pliable and can change over time. Every action you take is a vote for the person you want to become. Because of this, no single instance will transform your beliefs. But you can change your beliefs by changing those individual votes. You can develop a secure feeling about who you are and what you can do. In order to have what we want we need to prove that we can have it to ourselves. Once we are secure in our beliefs of who we are and what we can do; then will these dreams happen.

Please subscribe to this podcast and leave a rating and review, to help others find this podcast. Also, join the Facebook group. Here is the spot to click and set up a time so we can discuss how you can use these tools and others to get your amazing life!