LIVING INSPIRED with Jennifer Jayde

When we are feeling overworked and underpaid, when we're working a job we just wish would end, when we are working a business that started out of passion but has become stagnant - something is going on below the surface...

Before putting yourself into over-drive, jumping into a new strategy, or spending money on the newest piece of equipment, listen to this episode.

Hello beautiful!

I just finished up a hard leg day over at the Fitness Academy and I had an idea that I really wanted to share with you. It's about getting out of moving in circles and finally breaking through and moving forward. You feel like you've been moving in cycles, you've been chasing your own tail maybe or having a kind of ground hog day, but it's lasting a week or a month or a year.

There's this idea that just got implanted in my mind. I really want to share it with you and it is very simple, but if you practice it, I know you'll have profound change in your life. It'll just be a *bing* light bulb moment.

Do not skip over what you really, really want for you right now.

We can get so easily distracted, persuaded to succumb to a temporary pleasure, a temporary distraction, a temporary source of (maybe even false) happiness when really it's keeping us from creating the big picture, intention or desire.

Here's an obvious example, just so this really hits home. Say you have this goal of losing weight; you've got this nutrition plan and fitness plan, but you feel like having an ice cream treat right now, so you have one... and then maybe a little later you feel like having a handful of chips, so you have them... and these are things that you really want in the moment and when you're eating it feels really good and you have this temporary sense of joy. But is that really aligned with your longterm vision, your long term intention or desire or goal?

I'm not saying give up all of those things and you have to be totally perfect and everything you ever do has to be 100% aligned with the big picture.

What I'm asking you, or what I'm inviting you to explore in your own life, is have you been succumbing to too many of those temporary sources of happiness to the point that it is prolonging your big picture, goal, intention, desire, dream? 

If you're growing a business, maybe you have been doing the things that bring you temporary happiness but aren't aligning you with the big picture goal or intention. Maybe it's in your job or maybe it's in training for a marathon or anything where you have a big picture dream.

If you want to have a certain dollar amount in your savings account, maybe you want to buy a home or move to a nicer place or whatever it is, then are the majority of your actions aligned with that bigger picture or are they more aligned with what you want in the moment?

I hope that makes sense.

It's about not skipping over what you want in the future for what you want right now. 

Follow Your Heart Always,

Hey beautiful!

I was just thinking about something that I really wanted to pass along to you right now, and it may be the most counterintuitive thing you've ever heard when it comes to achieving your biggest dream for yourself right now.

So what I'm going to ask you to do, I ask you to keep an open mind.

If what you've been doing hasn't been working, let's be open to something new. It's going to feel very counterintuitive but,

let it go, surrender.

Whether you have dreams of becoming a millionaire, starting your business, leaving your job, getting out of debt, getting healthier, fitter, stronger, more muscle, whatever your dreams are. Yes, I'm telling you to let it go, to surrender. That is the only way I've ever gotten anything I really wanted in my life was when I was willing to let it go - and I know our head can scream at us, "but Jen, how can I let it go?"

That means I'm not going to get it. I'm not going to achieve it. I'm not gonna move forward to it.

Well, here's a subtle difference I really invite you to consider today, and that is to not let go of the desire of it, but to let go of the need for it.

Let go of the need for it.

When you have a needy energy it is not attracting anything or anyone to you, including money, including dreams, including good energy, including the love of your life. Whatever it is you're searching for, let go of the need for it. Keep the desire, keep the intention, let go of the need.

What does that look like? What's the difference? When you need something, you're becoming dependent on it being in your life, in order to be happy, in order to feel peace, in order to feel relaxed, in order to feel joy, you need this in order to _______.

I'm really encouraging, inviting you to let go of the need. When you remove the need, it will come to you so much swifter and so much easier.

Some of the ways it has shown up in my life is I so desperately wanted to have an ocean view place to live. It was something I really, really wanted and I was working my ass off for and finally I just said, you know what? I'm just going to love where I live right now and wherever I go, I go.

Next thing I know my husband is opening a gym in Victoria. I let him be in charge of finding our apartment. I was not searching, digging, controlling anything, and he didn't even tell me til the day we were moving in. He didn't even really realize it himself, that it was ocean view.

Getting two TV interviews in the span of six months, getting a book offer, these were not things I was striving for, that I felt I needed in my life. These were things I wanted that I thought would be cool and I desired, but I didn't have the neediness and they came into my life near effortlessly.

Something to consider. I love you. I wish you every success and for all your dreams to come true.

Have a great day.

Hey beauty,

I failed.

I failed. I hired a new fitness coach, I failed, and I want to tell you all about it.

The first task that I was given was to take in five days of cardio. Now I'm not going to be doing five days of cardio every week, but to kick things off and to jumpstart my body, she said five days of Cardio.

Last week I did not do five days of cardio, and it wasn't because I couldn't. There was nothing preventing me. I just didn't do it. I did four and I said to myself, you know what? I can do better.

There's a difference here because some people will fail the first time, it won't be done perfect, or things will take longer than they think and they will believe it's a sign from the universe that they're just not cut out for this.

Maybe they just can't do this. Maybe they're not meant for it.

And that's where 80 percent of people (I just made up that number) will just throw in the towel. 

"Well, the universe doesn't want this for me, it's giving me a sign. I can't do this. It's not meant for me, whatever it is."

But there's some people who will say, you know what? I can do better and there's a new week and there's a new start.

And so I'm happy to report, I just moments ago finished five days in a row of cardio.

I'm super happy. I'm super proud of myself, but it just really had me thinking about my clients that I work with. 

People that I observed that are starting new jobs, new businesses, new fitness routines, whatever it is, and when it's taking longer than they think or the results are taking longer than they want they believe that they're failing or the universe is giving them some kind of a sign that this isn't meant for them or that they're no good or they're not good enough.

Then they start to beat themselves up and their self worth tanks because they've attached their self worth to these results and it's just really sad because they - you have a gift in your heart.

You have a message you're meant to share.

You have a purpose that you're meant to give to the world and to enjoy it and to love it and to feel fulfilled and on fire and excited and love your life. And if it takes a little longer than you thought or it doesn't seem to be working out in the way that you thought it was going to be, it's not a sign that you're meant to quit.

It's not a sign that you're meant to give up.

It's to see are you interested or are you committed? An interested person will find an excuse. A committed person will find a way.

Follow Your Heart, Always

Hello beautiful!

I'm writing to you coming from just finishing up legs and sprints for today. My new fitness coach is working me hard for the first week, and brought something up for me that I really want to share with you. 

If you've had any issues staying disciplined, [maybe there's a goal that you want] whether it's a health goal, nutrition, fitness, business income, professional - any of those things, and it requires discipline.

It requires consistency.

It requires dedication.

While, personally, I have been allergic to the word discipline. I feel like I worked so hard to have the freedom that I have to leave my nine to five to create my own business, to create my own thriving business. Why would I want to go back to the discipline and regiment that I worked so hard to escape from?

I found that without the discipline there has been some inconsistency and I just don't like that feeling either. I don't like the feeling of inconsistent results and inconsistent outcomes.

This morning I learned that the word discipline comes from the word disciple. So the question is, what are you a disciple of?

That just changed everything for me.

Being a disciple of something means, to me, being a part of a community of something. I'm willingly being a part of something that's going to better me and my life and the dreams that I have for myself and what I want to give to others.

If you've been resistant to the word discipline, you don't like the word discipline, see it now as the word disciple. Ask yourself what you want to be a disciple of.

I love you. I hope you have a great day. I'll talk to you soon.

Hi Beautiful!

Have you ever felt tired or lethargic or unmotivated for no apparent reason? Maybe you haven't done a lot of physical activity but you're feeling physically exhausted as if you have.

This is for you.

I was just doing a run along the ocean here and I thought about the times that I felt that way in my life; where I felt particularly tired and not just for a day or a couple of days, but for weeks - sometimes even months. Now that I have the 20/20 hindsight, I realize that I was tired because there was a decision in my life that I was not making.

When I was unhappy in my job in finance I was wondering if there was more out there for me? If this was really it for my life, if this is as good as it gets? I felt really, really tired when I was thinking about that and should I stay? Should I go? What else would I do?

And then it happened again a few years later. 

I had started my photography business, my dream photography business, and a few years into that business I started feeling that nagging kind of tired, unmotivated feeling again. I thought, "what is wrong with me?" It wasn't even wedding season, I shouldn't have been this tired. Again it was because there was a decision in my life I was not making. There was something that I actually didn't even want to face - that I didn't really want to have a photography business anymore, but I had no idea what else I would do.

Then the third time was when I was undecided about where I wanted to live. "Do I stay really close to my parents and my family and my friends or do I go where I've always wanted to go?"

And those are the extreme times where I felt really tired, unmotivated and exhausted just for no apparent reason. I wasn't running marathons, I didn't have young kids at home, there was no logical reason for why I was tired and I realized it was because I was sitting in indecision.

There was something in my life I was not making a decision on.

So I wanted to check in with you today and I wanted to see if you're feeling tired. If you're feeling unmotivated, if your life is feeling lackluster to you, is there a decision that you've been putting off? Is there something that you're, if you're honest with yourself, you're not thrilled with it anymore? 

Maybe it's your career, maybe it's your business, maybe it's your house, maybe it's the town you live in. Maybe it's the relationship you're in. Maybe it's something so scary that you don't want to face it and you don't want to make a decision.

So you're sitting on the fence.

And the thing about sitting on the fence is that it's the most exhausting place you could possibly be.

So I ask you today, if you were to make a decision for yourself, what would be the most powerful decision you could make today that's true for you? If you're being really honest with yourself and what you really want in this life, what is one decision closer to the life you want to live, to the person you want to be, and the experience that you want to have in the time that you have left? 

I love you. I'll talk to you next time.

Hey beautiful,

Coming from a recovering control freak, recovering perfectionist, it's possible for things to turn out way better than you thought without controlling how it happens.

If you have a dream of creating a certain income amount or you have a dream of living in a certain location or you have a dream of starting a business or you have a dream of whatever it may be, and you think,

"Okay, logically, I need to now map out every single step. I need to figure out and control how this is all gonna happen."

"Oh, wait a minute, I have no idea how this is all going to happen. This picture is so big in my mind, I have no idea how I'm going to get there. It's probably not going to happen. Why even get started so many times?"

I've seen that time and time again and honestly, it's a natural reaction of the brain. It's a natural pattern that the brain wants to follow.

This is why you always hear the cliche of follow your heart because that vision, that dream, that goal, that you have is meant for you.

Even if your mind does not understand the how, or does not even believe fully that it's possible.

I want you to know that it is.

Those desires, those dreams, no matter how big they are or how monstrous or how far away they may seem, they are meant for you.

You do not need to know how you're going to get there or figure out all the steps along the way. In fact, I prefer that you don't try to figure out all the steps because the universe has something far greater in mind for you than you could ever think of on your own.

All you need to do is keep moving forward with what excites you. Keep making those connections. Keep meeting the people that feel good to meet. Keep taking the actions or the courses or the whatever they are that feel good even if it doesn't make sense in your mind.

As Steve Jobs says, the dots never connect looking forward, they only connect looking backwards, so all we can do is keep moving forward with what feels good and trust that the dots will connect.

I love you. Keep following your heart. Do what excites you and your dreams are going to come true for you.

Hey beautiful,

I'm having this spontaneous nudge to share something with you that I have been working on in my own life, my personal life, and I've seen it in my clients.

What I'm about to share with you has really served both me in overcoming this as well as my clients - so I really wanted to share this with you.

If you resonate as someone who continuously people pleases; say yes when you really mean no, do favours when you actually really don't want to, lend money that you really don't have extra to give, lend of your time (that you really don't have extra to give), lend of your energy (that you really don't have extra to give). Maybe you have even attracted people who are/were continuously in need of help, of support, of guidance, and you feel like maybe they're more of a taker and you're more of the giver.

If you resonate with what I'm saying, a people pleaser saying yes when you really mean no and bending over backwards. Being left feeling depleted at the end of the day, like you didn't get anything done that you wanted to get done, like all you ever do is take care of everyone else and never take care of yourself.

"I'm fatigued

tired

fed up

drained

depleted."

This is for you.

If you are open to hearing this right now it is going to set you wildly free. So pay attention.

I'm going to start with a little example - a personal story of how I had this light bulb moment.

It's not a pretty story, but I'm here to help and if I need to divulge this information with you, I will.

About a year ago (last June 2017) it was my birthday. I don't expect much for my birthday from my friends and family, a 'hello', a 'happy birthday', a text, a card - is nice. I love to spend time with people close to me if we can do that. That's my love language, for anyone who's read The Five Love Languages, quality time.

There was someone in my inner circle who I had done (in my own mind) a lot for this particular person. I had done a lot to help them. I had done a lot to support them. I had given of extra time that I didn't necessarily have. I had given extra money that I hadn't necessarily budgeted giving away. I had gone out of alignment with myself in order to be of service to this person.

When you think about it in your mind, you say "well, that's what a good person does"

right? 

A good person is always there for other people, especially the people closest to them. They always say yes. They always go out of their way. They bend over backwards even if it's not convenient.

And that's true. But here's where I was going wrong..

I was saying yes when I actually didn't want to say yes, I was doing things that I actually didn't want to do and honestly this person never asked me to.

This person never actually asked me to do any of this.

I was taking on the role of savior, of a protector, of encourager, of rescuer, of all these things. I took that role on. Nobody asked me to.

It's my birthday, and here's this person that I have been bending over backwards for and I didn't receive even a birthday card. (I think I got like a facebook message or something, but no card, no nothing. This is an inner, inner circle person and I was so triggered. I'm not proud to admit, but I was upset.)

I was triggered.

I don't get easily angered, especially in such a way.

I'm not a confrontational person so I didn't even confront this person, but I could not sleep. All I could think was how does this happen? How does this happen? I started listing all the things I've done over the past year, or couple years, and all the times I had gone out of my way. I couldn't even sleep. I was tossing in my bed.

Finally I turned on my phone and I watched a Ted Ted talk that actually changed everything for me.

What this person went on to describe in the Ted talk is that as children, we are rewarded for helping other people.

We are given a pat on the back, a tap on the head.

"Good girl"

Every time that we do something nice, every time we go out of our way or share, even if we didn't want to, we get this pat on the back. 

And there's nothing wrong with that - but where we can get tripped up is when we are still doing that as adults

and we're doing it to fill a need.

So I really want to differentiate. There's a difference between doing nice things for people because you want to and because it genuinely feels good to, and going out of alignment with yourself because you have a need to be pat on the head and told that you're a good person.

One of those things is genuine. One of those things you really wanted to do and you really had no expectation of anything in return. You would have done this thing, this favor, this nice deed, even if this person didn't say thank you for it - even if they didn't know that you did it.

The other type, this is the type that I'm focusing on, is when you have self-appointed yourself as savior and you need to be the rescuer and you need to help this person and you slide in there to fix everything for them and you get to a place where you become bitter and resentful.

What you're looking for is for some self-worth cup to be filled from gratitude, from appreciation, from someone telling you that you're a good person or that you did a good job or that you're a good sister, a good wife, a good daughter, or a good coach.

Here's how you can tell the difference.

This is how I test everything now because I used to just say yes all the time. Before I'm about to do something like offer to pay for something or offer to do something, I just take a second to test if I'm in alignment with saying yes to this. 

I picture that I've already done it.

I picture that I've already answered the question or done the good deed or whatever, put down the favor or paid for this or that, and I asked myself, would I be pissed if they didn't say thank you? Would I do this? 

There's going to be times when you think "yeah, totally."

and there are going to be times when you don't.

That's how you really tell the difference.

Please let me know if what I'm sharing resonates with you, if it makes sense, if it's landing with you - because I love sharing this information with you, but I do want to know if it's actually helping.

Remember that you are loved unconditionally and supported unconditionally.

I'm sending you so much love.

Hey beauty,

Just a quick note for you today, beautiful.

I know what it's like to feel down on yourself, on where you're at in your life. Maybe you feel you haven't accomplished all the things you have on your heart to accomplish and things are taking longer than it seems they should.

I want to remind you that you have done so many great and amazing things in your life already.

If you take a moment to sit down and make a list of all the things you've already accomplished in your life it will give you a new, fresh breath of life.

Everything you desire is meant for you.

It's possible.

The only time you will fail is if you give up, so put that wind back in your sales.

Make a list right now. Write it down. Don't just try to think in your head of a couple things.

Make a list.

The last 10 years; everything you've done, everything you've seen, everything you were afraid of and you accomplished anyways. Nothing is too small to count. Make that list.

As long as you can refresh yourself, get back out there.

I love you. Until next time,

Follow Your Heart Always,

Hello beautiful,

I just wanted to pop in here with a quick message around whether you are being deceived or misled.

And not just from outside people but from yourself.

Now stick with me for a second because it dawned on me yesterday ~

I was celebrating at a late birthday BBQ with my family and my mom, sisters and I are all into spiritual work and growth, and we're fascinated by all things metaphysical. My mom had this beautiful clear quartz crystal and myself, my husband, my sisters and their boyfriends were kind of playing around with being able to close our eyes and sense where the crystal was.

For example, was the crystal under our right hand or left hand? Or, if someone would run it by the other person's hand, they had to guess when it was right under their palm and say 'stop.'

A couple of fun things like this just for giggles and I realized when I was taking my turn that I would have two responses.

I would have a gut instinct. I would have a sensation, an energetic kind of feeling that was very subtle

and then the secondary one would be, "but I think it's actually over here", or "would you put it in this hand?" Or "which hand did he or she already do, so maybe they've got it over in this hand now".

And I realized this is just like anything in life, including business. If you're an entrepreneur it's that first instinct is the right one. (And for anyone wondering, I did get it right all three times in a row.)

But I noticed that every time I was very tempted to listen to what my head was mentally telling me to choose or trying to figure out what it rationally might be, and I lived a lot in my life that way.

Listening to my head,

listening to what was the rational right decision or the logical decision and making my life choices that way (and my daily miniscule choices that way) and I ended up unhappy. 

So more and more I've been practicing letting my instincts, letting my intuition, letting my gut feeling, letting my inner guide lead me in the right direction (even when my head does not understand or does not agree). 

I trust my inner instinct, which is usually that first gut instinct.

That's the direction I go and I have never, ever, ever been let down, disappointed or deceived. Whereas my mind has deceived me many, many, many, many times.

I just wanted to share that with you today.

I love you. Have an amazing rest of your day.