Loneliness is the state of being lonely. Lonely is defined as, 'being unhappy because you are not with other people'. But being alone is not a prerequisite to feeling lonely. If we feel unhappy about not being with other people then that is because we have unhappy thinking about not being with other people.

Everyone will feel differently. We might have a different length of time we are happy being alone, think there has to be a certain number of social events to not feel lonely or we might actually prefer to spend more time alone than with other people.

There is nothing wrong with any of these perspectives. We all think differently and feel differently as a result. The trouble is that we are being told that being alone is making us feel bad. It does not have the capacity to do that. This does not mean that I want you to ignore the old man on your street who is living on his own. But it does mean that I would love for us to stop perpetuating the myth that the world works outside in at all ever because it just doesn't work that way. Without the threat of damage to our mental health, we still might seek time with other humans and look out for the humans in our lives who are alone but do we really need the threat of mental illness on our minds? 

I suspect not!

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