Remember when making friends was as simple as sharing your lunch at recess? 

In this week's episode, we're digging into the beautiful complexity of adult friendship – from the vulnerability of new connections to the evolution of decades-long bonds.

From an unexpected prayer in a corporate bathroom to skinny dipping at 50, I'm dishing on 25 years of friendship with my girlfriend Christi, plus the question that revolutionized how I see friendship itself.

Ever wonder how to ask someone to be your friend after 40? 

Let's discuss!

Mentioned in Episode 10:

Dating. Friendship. Networking… Bumble: https://bumble.com/

Most of us have a voice that tells us we’re “too much” or “not enough.” 

Episode 9 dives into how external criticism often becomes our inner dialogue.

Sparked by Dr. Raquel Martin's insight about injected oppression, we're exploring where those limiting beliefs come from. How they shape our relationships, and what happens when we finally recognize them for what they are.

Plus, a juicy homework assignment might change how you talk to yourself forever.

Time to reclaim your voice. 

Mentioned in Episode 9:

"Injected oppression evolves into internalized oppression." - Dr. Raquel Martin https://www.raquelmartinphd.com/

Remember when we used to wait months for a movie to come out? The buildup. The teasers. The sweet angst of anticipation.  

In Episode 8, I'm using a little nostalgia to break down the difference between eroticism and sensuality. We’re exploring imagination, presence and how these two forces play together in our relationships.

And there’s a simple practice you can try at home to bring more of both into your daily life. You can thank me later. 😉

Mentioned in Episode 8:

Esther Perel: https://estherperel.com/

Ever find yourself playing mom to your partner? You know the drill — chronic fixing, saving, and problem-solving. (Raises my hand 🙋🏽‍♀️)

In Episode 7, we're unpacking that sneaky urge to mother our romantic partners and how it might sabotage our relationships. From the allure of being needed to those familiar caretaking patterns, we learned way back when.

I'm sharing five practical ways to shift from being someone's emotional mother to being their equal partner.

Time to retire that superhero cape, love. You deserve a partner, not a project. 💕

Who are you... beneath all the roles you play on a daily?

Yep, we're going there.

Episode 6 is juicy. It’s all about excavating the you buried beneath years of "shoulds" and expectations. And because I love a good map, I’m sharing a 5-step process for getting to the core of who you really are.

This episode is a compass if you've been feeling lost —in your roles —in your relationships.

This one might stir up some sh*t in a good way. But don't worry, I got you 😉

Mentioned in Episode 6:

📚 NEW BOOK: How Do I Tell Them I Have Herpes?

🎓 UPCOMING: Safer Sex Conversation Masterclass 11/7 (free admission with your book purchase)

🔍 STI Statistics mentioned:

• 55% increase in syphilis rates among adults 55+ (2018-2022)

• Nearly 5x increase in gonorrhea cases among 55+ (2012-2020)

• Triple increase in chlamydia cases among 55+ in the past decade

Additional resources:

• AARP: STIs in Older Adults: Where Does Your State Rank?

Your picker isn’t broken, my love. Don’t worry. You are not doomed to repeat the same relationship patterns forever.

Episode 5 of Love Is… is a deep dive into why the “wrong” one might be one of your greatest teachers and how every connection —even the baddies —can catapult growth.

Relationships are not vending machines for happiness. But they are fertilizers for evolution. 

Get ready to shift your focus from “who” you’re picking to how you’re showing up, and discover how to use curiosity to disrupt those pesky patterns. 

Reminder: All timing is divine. 

You have the power to shape your story, and love is evolution. So let’s make shift happen!

Mentioned in Episode 5:

• Terry Real – Family Therapist, Speaker. and Author - Relationships move through a natural cycle of "harmony, disharmony, and repair."

• Esther Perel – "The constant changes that we go through, the liquid life that we live, demands that our relational skills be primarily able to change." 

• Buddhist Proverb – "When you change, everything in your environment changes." 

• The Littlest Soul and the Sun Parable – Based on Conversations with God By Neale Donald Walsch

This week, we're unpacking the herpes stigma. It's time to get real about this common condition that affects billions.

Discover why herpes doesn’t define you and how it might even lead to more authentic connections. We'll explore why shame can't survive in the light and how to navigate those tricky disclosure conversations with confidence.

In Episode 4, we’re reclaiming worth, embracing wholeness, and remembering that Love Is… always possible. Plus, I’m sharing deets about my upcoming book that's going to revolutionize how you think about sexual health conversations.

Mentioned in Episode 4:

Homework: Repeat after me: "I am worthy of love and connection." Feel it, believe it, live it!

Links:

1. How Do I Tell Them I Have Herpes book + Safer Sex class (pre-order book and get free admission)

2. World Health Organization statistics on herpes 

Suggested Resources:

• The New Zealand Herpes Foundation (a phenomenal resource, no matter where you live)

• Herpes: A Patient’s Guide

• American Sexual Health Association (ASHA)

P.S. Struggling with herpes status or sexual health concerns? Let's chat. I'm offering a FREE 20-minute judgment-free (confidential) conversation to discuss your challenges. No pitch, just support.

Feeling meh about your changing body? You’re not alone.

In this episode of "Love Is," we're diving into the nitty-gritty of sex after 40. From responsive arousal to those "sandpapery" moments, we're unpacking it all.

Episode 3 is about loving your evolving body, having those squirmy conversations, and rediscovering pleasure. Because midlife sex? It's a whole new adventure.

Mentioned in Episode 3:

1. The "Three Things" exercise: staceyherrera.com/threethings

2. "Yes, No, Maybe" list: staceyherrera.com/yesnomaybe

3. The Pleasure Chest: thepleasurechest.com/

Love and heartbreak hits different after 40... or is that just me? Let’s discuss! 

Episode 2 is all about choosing love, even when it’s hard with a capital H, and embracing the possibilities.

I’ve got 7 unexpected ways to deepen your relationships—with others and yourself. I’m also jamming about why presence might be your new superpower and how letting go could revolutionize your love life.

We’re just getting started!

Quotes:

Our hearts connect with lots of folks in a lifetime, but most of us don’t realize it. We’ll go to our graves with no experience of true love.” — bell hooks

“Remember, care is a dimension of love, but simply giving care does not mean we are loving.” —bell hooks

“Love is as love does. Love is an act of will—namely, both an intention and an action. Will also implies choice. We do not have to love. We choose to love.” — M. Scott Peck

“Telling the truth is essential for mental and physical health, and it improves our lives despite being painful.” — Dr. Anna Lampke

“Attention is the most basic form of love. Through it, we bless it and are blessed.” — John Tarrant

Resources:

All About Love by bell hooks

Ever feel like you’re dragging a suitcase full of past hurts while hoping for a brighter future? In this debut episode of LOVE IS, we’re unpacking that emotional baggage and making room for joy.

Discover why joy isn’t just a feeling – it’s a radical act of self-love. We’ll explore how treating yourself well creates a magnetic field that attracts the life and love you desire.

Episode 1 is all about choosing joy, loving fiercely, and embracing the delicious possibility of right now. Discover why now is always the perfect time to choose love. Plus, there’s a juicy homework assignment to kickstart your self-love journey.

Mentioned in Episode 1:

Quotes:

1. Maya Angelou – “I don’t trust people who don’t love themselves and tell me, ‘I love you.’ There is an African saying which is: Be careful when a naked person offers you a shirt.”
2. George Eliot (Mary Ann Evans) – “It’s never too late to be what you might have been.”

References:

1. Marie Kondo – Referenced in the phrase “Marie Kondo the hell out of our mental closets,” a nod to Marie’s philosophy of tidying and letting go of things that no longer serve you.