Today on the show, Alison talks to me about the fact that she finds herself saying “YES” to the needs and requests of others, when she really should be saying no, because she doesn’t have the bandwidth or capacity to do it, and she finds herself bitter, burnout, and resentful. Why does she have this pattern and where does it come from? Today on Talk To Me, we dig deep and find out where this pattern started and the answer will surprise you as much it surprised her because it goes way back, farther than she ever expected.  You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode I have an on-air counseling session with Annie F. Downs who talks to me about a difficult season she faced after facing a breakup followed by the devastating loss of her nephew followed by physical health struggles all in the same time-period, dealing with grief upon grief upon grief. We talk about all the difficult feelings that come up during hard seasons when we’re feeling overwhelmed, and what on earth we’re supposed to do with all the hard feelings…especially for people who have a tendency to run from the hard feelings, or to numb the hard feelings. If you’re walking through any sort of heartbreak or grief or pain right now, this episode is for you. We will get through this together.  You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when you seem drawn to the same type of person, but that “type” is someone who is emotionally unavailable? Why are certain people drawn to these types of unhealthy cycles of relationships, and how do you break the cycle? Today I talk to Erica, who is tired of emotionally unavailable men, and wanting to understand her role in attracting these types of relationships. Listen into this powerful conversation! You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Is it possible to get attached to a relationship you made up in your mind? Today Denise calls in to talk to me, because she’s struggling to let go of a relationship that she has been imagining in her mind, and wanting to embrace reality. After many years of casually interacting with someone that she has feelings for, she’s ready to let it go and move forward into a realistic perspective of their relationship. But she needs help…so listen along to this interesting conversation! You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Katie comes to talk to me today about a breakup that she's second guessing. We processed why she broke up with him, and then talk through some of her regrets. What happens when you look back and realize you might have made a mistake in breaking up? Where do you go from there? How do you know whether or not it was the right decision? This episode is powerful for anyone who can relate to second-guessing yourself after a breakup.  You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode of Couples Therapy I talk with Brooke and Wiley, who are struggling with his over-reactive triggers to simple questions. Wiley is tired of her questions, but Brooke feels like she can’t ask anything without it turning into a fight, and she’s not sure how to deal with it. We turn the tables on Wiley and help him identify why this might be the case, and how to begin identifying the root cause of his triggers. It’s a powerful conversation of learning to go back and heal the past, in order to heal the present. If you get triggered by the same thing again and again, this conversation is one you don’t want to miss.  You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: $15.00 – A Couple’s Guide to Building Emotional Intimacy Through Weekly Conversations. The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode of Couples Therapy, I sit down with my friends and pastors Irene and Jimmy Rollins who are in a seriously stressful season of life right now, which is starting to impact their marriage. The build-up of stress has caused new tensions, and without the old unhealthy coping skills of addiction to default to — they’re having to pave a new path this time around. We talk through the stress they’re facing, and how they can actually help one another — by learning what it truly means to help themselves. It’s an eye-opening conversation for married couples about the possibility of developing codependency in marriage, and an important reminder about how continuing to focus on individual healing will always overflow into marriage. You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: $15.00 – A Couple’s Guide to Building Emotional Intimacy Through Weekly Conversations. The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Have you ever wondered, “Why do we keep having the same fight?” Today on Talk To Me, I have an on-air Couples Therapy session with Jeff and Michelle who don’t understand why, after all of their years in marriage ministry and helping other couples, they can’t seem to help themselves. They keep having the same fight over and over again (and you’ll be surprised when you find out what it’s about). I help them get to the roots of the reason why, and give them a plan to move forward. It’s a really important session to listen to if you’re struggling with the same cycle of conflict over and over again. You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Couples Therapy is BACK!!! And I am so excited about the couples we have joining us for the month of February for the Couples Therapy Series.  So what’s the newlywed stage really like for Instagram Relationship influencers Kait and JJ Tomlin? Today in this on-air session, I dig deep with Kait and JJ and talk through some of the newlywed struggles and hardships that have come in these early years of marriage and getting used to one another. We talk about the bad habits, conflict, and situations they’ve struggled with, and how it’s been harder than they expected. But then we offer some strategies and steps to moving forward into creating the marriage they want to have. It’s an important episode for those of you in the early years of marriage or who one day hope to be! And for those of you who are feeling stuck and need a little encouragement. You can also watch the full episode on YouTube. Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast Extras: The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we talk to Susie who has struggled with body shame for many years, and is trying to break free. Body shame can impact people of all ages and stages of life, and for Susie, it’s been holding her back in many areas. She’s looking for a RESET in how she views herself and freedom from self-critique and self-hatred. I help her unpack where her body shame began, and give her steps to take in order to move toward freedom in this area of her life. If you’ve ever struggled with body shame, this episode will help you and challenge you to do things differently! Extras: 31-Day Reset Journey: Start 2025 with a 31-Day RESET! Get ready to change your life from the inside out! This is your year to RESET!!! Soul Care: Order Soul Care Today! The Debra Fileta Counselors Network: Book a counseling session at the Debra Fileta Counselors Network and get started on your healing journey from the inside out TODAY!  DEBRA FILETA is a Licensed Professional Counselor, national speaker, bestselling author, relationship expert, and founder of the Debra Fileta Counselors Network. She’s written seven books including Choosing Marriage,True Love Dates, Love In Every Season,Are You Really OK?, Married Sex, RESET, and Soul Care. She’s also the host of Talk To Me: The Debra Fileta Podcast (formerly the Love + Relationships Podcast) where she facilitates on-air authentic counseling-style sessions. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter or book an online session with her or someone from her team today! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices