I so badly want to be cool. You know - hot, unbothered, effortlessly detached. I want to have casual sex and not spiral. I want to leave someone’s house and not immediately romanticize the way they said goodbye. But the truth is... I can’t.

If monogamy is so natural, why does everyone cheat?
In this episode, we dig into the truth behind cheating - not as a moral failure, but as a symptom. Of repression. Of patriarchy. Of a system designed by religion and control.

There was a part of me that hoped my ex would listen to the last episode and feel guilty. Remorseful, even.
But then I remembered who he is.
Instead, he hit me up - mad that I called him my ex. Not mad about what he did. Not about anything else. Just… the title.
So that’s the inspo for this week’s episode:
why abusers are allergic to accountability, why they love arguing semantics, and how toxic relationships literally rewire your brain.
He said I’m obsessed.
I said ok BET.

Did you know abuse can literally rewire your brain? Chronic trauma can shrink your hippocampus, fuck up your memory, and leave your nervous system in a constant state of panic.

This is the story of an abusive relationship - and the answer to the infamous “why didn’t you just leave?”

This episode is about craving validation, wanting to be chosen, and feeling lowkey insane for even admitting it. Why does adulthood still feel like high school? Why do I feel left out when no one’s actually excluding me? I don’t have the answers, but I needed to talk about it.

In this episode, I talk about what it means to be consumed by your own feelings - when overthinking turns into emotional paralysis and detachment is not an option (or a scam). For the ones who care too much, spiral too hard, and function too little.

Sex is supposed to be about connection, but for me, it’s been about performing, pleasing, and fitting into a system that doesn’t prioritize women’s needs. In this episode, I explore how patriarchy, porn, and objectification have influenced my relationship to sex, why I’ve often avoided it, and how I’m still learning what it truly means to me.

Content Warning: Personal reflections on sex, patriarchy, and trauma.

I used to spend all my time thinking about the person I wanted to be. Then I got tired of that and just... started. If you’ve ever felt stuck in your own head, this one’s for you.