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Monkey mind is a common metaphor for the wildly busy thoughts we sometimes experience during meditation. If your meditation practice is still young, you may find yourself struggling to calm your thoughts, but there’s something mature meditators know that you don’t: Monkey mind is not a problem to be solved.

Do you recall the first few times you meditated? Were you surprised to discover how busy your mind was? It’s a common reaction.

 

Monkey mind can be distressing

 

It’s also common to work hard to resist a busy mind, to fight it, and will it to be calm.

But, pushing back against thoughts creates resistance and negative reactions. You begin to feel frustrated, helpless, and maybe even angry. You come to the realization that you cannot get rid of your thoughts. And you’re right! You can’t get rid of them.

At this point, you might conclude that meditation isn’t for you. This conclusion is based on the misperception that you’re supposed to calm your mind and get rid of your thoughts.

It’s not just beginners who suffer from this misapprehension. More than once, a student has said to me, “I’ve just read a book by [insert meditation guru’s name here], and he says calming your mind isn’t the purpose of meditation,” to which I always want to reply, “I’ve been telling you that for two years!”

I think, though, students need to hear the message again and again until it sinks in: Meditation is not about calming your mind or getting rid of thoughts. It is about noticing thoughts and then refocusing attention on the breath. Meditation is all about coming back to the breath - again, and again, and again.

And that’s what a mature meditator knows.  A mature meditator is not immune to monkey mind. On balance, a practiced meditator does have a calmer mind, but they too have days where their thoughts run amok. The difference is they don’t react negatively to monkey mind. Instead, they know how to be patient and keep refocusing their attention even on days when the mind is highly active.

Mature meditators know that resisting and struggling against an active mind doesn’t work. They understand the mind will always think, and that some days, the mind will think obsessively. And, they’re okay with that.

Even as a beginner, you can bring this maturity to your practice. When the mind is busy, sit with it and calmly observe it being busy. Watch the thoughts come and go, without trying to change them, without reacting to them. Just let them be there.

Let go and relax into the meditation knowing you don’t need to fight and exert control over your mind. That act of letting go can sometimes even allow the mind to calm down on its own, but if it doesn’t calm down, that’s okay. Just accept that as the reality of the present moment. That’s what meditation is all about: Noticing the present moment without judging it. If the present moment brings a busy mind, then so be it. That’s just how it is and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Now, let's practice meditation together

For a 10-minute guided meditation for a busy mind, forward the podcast or the video above to 3:18.

Next week:

Next week in Part 2 of the Meditation Misconceptions Series, I’m going to uncover a number of misunderstandings that are generated by the imagery you commonly see in meditation and mindfulness magazines and websites. This is more than just a critique. Those misconceptions can actually prevent people from fully engaging with mindfulness practice, so I think it’s important to talk about them.

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