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Turn Conflict Into Clarity: Making Requests in MarriageIn this episode, I share a simple “volume knob” tool to reduce everyday marriage frustration by improving how we communicate. Using a real example from a couple with an infant, I explain four levels of communication—suggestion, wish, request, and boundary—and how moving from hints to clear, respectful making requests can prevent resentment and power struggles. I teach you to start requests with “Would you please,” and to make SMART requests (specific, measurable, action-oriented, reasonable, time-limited). I also cover healthy options for responding to requests—yes (with follow-through), no (with clarity), or a counter offer (changing the task or time)—and when boundaries are needed to protect respect, safety, and trust. Here's the link to download my free couples communication guide: https://www.turnitup.coach/communicationguideI'm also offering a free 30-minute strategy call for personalized help. Schedule your free Strategy call today at by calling or texting 626-804-1731or go to https://tidycal.com/kdupee1/30-minute-strategy-callHere's the link to get your free copy of my book, Turn it Up - how to have the lifelong marriage that you really want: https://turnitup.coach/75Here's the link to my video on How to ask for what you need in your marriage: https://youtu.be/2sUcdK5dPCg00:00 Why Marriage Feels Hard00:54 Infant Naptime Conflict02:22 The Volume Knob Framework02:54 Suggestions Can Sound Critical03:37 Wishes Share Your Heart04:28 Make Clear Smart Requests06:20 Responding Yes No Counter09:24 When You Need Boundaries11:13 Try This Tonight11:56 Final Encouragement Next StepsAre you feeling like your spouse just doesn't hear you? A lot of everyday marriage frustration isn't about WHAT you're asking for, but HOW you're asking it. This video offers practical marriage advice to improve your communication skills and address common relationship problems. Learn to speak clearly and with love, fostering effective communication in marriage.
By by Kelly DuPéeTurn Conflict Into Clarity: Making Requests in MarriageIn this episode, I share a simple “volume knob” tool to reduce everyday marriage frustration by improving how we communicate. Using a real example from a couple with an infant, I explain four levels of communication—suggestion, wish, request, and boundary—and how moving from hints to clear, respectful making requests can prevent resentment and power struggles. I teach you to start requests with “Would you please,” and to make SMART requests (specific, measurable, action-oriented, reasonable, time-limited). I also cover healthy options for responding to requests—yes (with follow-through), no (with clarity), or a counter offer (changing the task or time)—and when boundaries are needed to protect respect, safety, and trust. Here's the link to download my free couples communication guide: https://www.turnitup.coach/communicationguideI'm also offering a free 30-minute strategy call for personalized help. Schedule your free Strategy call today at by calling or texting 626-804-1731or go to https://tidycal.com/kdupee1/30-minute-strategy-callHere's the link to get your free copy of my book, Turn it Up - how to have the lifelong marriage that you really want: https://turnitup.coach/75Here's the link to my video on How to ask for what you need in your marriage: https://youtu.be/2sUcdK5dPCg00:00 Why Marriage Feels Hard00:54 Infant Naptime Conflict02:22 The Volume Knob Framework02:54 Suggestions Can Sound Critical03:37 Wishes Share Your Heart04:28 Make Clear Smart Requests06:20 Responding Yes No Counter09:24 When You Need Boundaries11:13 Try This Tonight11:56 Final Encouragement Next StepsAre you feeling like your spouse just doesn't hear you? A lot of everyday marriage frustration isn't about WHAT you're asking for, but HOW you're asking it. This video offers practical marriage advice to improve your communication skills and address common relationship problems. Learn to speak clearly and with love, fostering effective communication in marriage.