Malcolm Cox

Here we are, almost the end of the year, and time for some reflection. Specifically, reflecting on the effectiveness of our speaking.

I made similar recordings in December last year and the year before. The links are below.

[https://youtu.be/h834b238Ses](https://youtu.be/h834b238Ses)

[https://youtu.be/GLcIz3xtAUI](https://youtu.be/GLcIz3xtAUI)

---

I think it's fair to assume, if you're watching this video or listening to the podcast, you are someone who wants to grow in your effectiveness as a speaker. One of my guiding Scriptures is in Acts chapter 14:

“At Iconium Paul and Barnabas went as usual into the Jewish synagogue. There they spoke so effectively that a great number of Jews and Greeks believed.” (Acts 14:1 NIV11)

How wonderful! They were so *effective* that people believed. What this hints at is that it is not only *knowing* the right information, nor even speaking *correctly* about the topic, but growing in effectiveness.

How shall we approach assessing our effectiveness this year? I have decided to keep it very simple. We will discuss one issue and one issue only today.

["Feedback, Bible, Inspiration". Summary class, Tuesday Teaching Tips: Episode 214](https://youtu.be/x9Ruo-PvRIA)

["How to give feedback to a preacher": Tuesday Teaching Tips](https://youtu.be/g_efN-sy4ZM)

Because I have recorded on issues to do with feedback before, I'm not going to go into a lot of detail today. I have added links above to a couple of other classes addressing feedback. Additionally, I am attaching a PDF of a speaker survey we are using this year in the Thames Valley churches of Christ. 

[Speaker_Survey.pdf](https://s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/secure.notion-static.com/35734f8b-6d69-4538-89fb-55c56f43251f/Speaker_Survey.pdf)

Further, I can recommend a book by my friend Chris Chin:

[Collaborative Feedback - Curious Learning](https://www.curiouslearning.co.uk/collaborative-feedback)

My suggestion is to ask two questions of those to whom you speak regularly:

1. Please tell me one thing I do well that you would like me to continue doing and why that matters to you.

2. Please tell me one thing I could improve, and why that matters to you.

Honestly, I think that will do. More than that maybe more complicated than is necessary.

---

Finally, let me set a good example by asking you for that precise feedback for myself. 

Please tell me something I do well that you'd like me to continue doing and why that matters to you. And, please tell me one thing I could improve and why that matters to you.

You can send feedback to my email address: [email protected].

---

Please add your comments on this week’s topic. We learn best when we learn in community.

Do you have a question about teaching the Bible? Is it theological, technical, practical? Send me your questions or suggestions. Here’s the email: [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]).

If you’d like a copy of my free eBook on spiritual disciplines, “How God grows His people”, sign up at my website: http://[www.malcolmcox.org](http://www.malcolmcox.org/).

Please pass the link on, subscribe, leave a review.

“Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” (Psalms 100:2 NIV11)

God bless, Malcolm

It was Wednesday morning. I was part-way through my prayer walk in the woods. I heard a noise above me in the canopy. A small branch fell a few yards away. I moved on a little nervously. Suddenly, an almighty "Crack!" made me jump, and I sprinted off the path into the undergrowth. Turning round I saw the trunk of a tree laid across the path where I had walked seconds earlier. If I had not moved, it would have flattened me. Serious injury or death were the only possible outcomes.

I stood still for a few moments, thanking Good for preservation. The remainder of my prayer time that day was more focused than up to that point. I've had a few brushes with death in my life. But this was the first for a long time. I was pretty shaken up, as you might imagine. And then I asked myself whether this was a coincidence or not.

I cannot say for sure whether God allowed this to happen to wake me up to something. Or, whether it's one of those things that occurs in life and God protected me. However, two things did come to mind as I finished my prayer walk.

I have an enemy. There's no point in praying "deliver us from evil" unless it exists and has evil intent. The Apostle Peter put it well when he said, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.” (1 Peter 5:8 NIV11) Whilst it is true that Christ, through the cross, has defeated all principalities and powers, nonetheless, whilst we are this side of his return those principalities and powers are still at work. Perhaps part of the lesson for me is that I do well in prayer to ask God to help me "be alert and of sober mind".

I have important things to do. The end comes for all of us, but while we are here we all have significant matters to attend to. As I walked away from the fallen tree I reflected on all the things that remain as yet undone. Unfinished articles and books to write, phone calls to make, videos to record, lesson to prepare, fun things to do. And much more. 

It's almost the end of the year. A time to reflect. For me, especially after this event, a time to make sure my compass is pointing in the right direction. Cutting out the things that do not matter, and investing in the things that do.

You don't have to have a narrow escape to develop a sober mind. Simply reflecting on the power of God, and the magnificence of his love can help us to refine our schedules, priorities and to do lists. I hope you have a superb Christmas and New Year, but whatever else you do, set a little time aside to reflect on the reality that our time on this earth is limited. Let's make the most of it.

Take a look at this flyer for a teaching conference coming up in March 2021. I registered this week. I heartily recommend anyone with an interest in these matters to do so.

Register here: https://www.teleiossociety.com

Penny and I have been asked to teach at the conference. More details coming soon. However, the focus will centre on the connection between theology, ecology and God's vision for this earth. Please pray for us as we prepare. 

If you'd like to pray for me I'd be very grateful. Here are some of my plans:

Until the next time, 

God bless, Malcolm

‘Yours, LORD, is the greatness and the power and the glory and the majesty and the splendour, for everything in heaven and earth is yours. Yours, LORD, is the kingdom.’

It’s to give him our little empires (family, ministry, career) and say ‘yours, Lord, is the kingdom’. It’s to give him the power-bases we’ve built and say ‘yours, Lord, is the power’. It's to give him our credibility, our trophies of success, and say ‘yours, Lord, is the glory forever and right now’. Greig, Pete. How to Pray: A Simple Guide for Normal People (p. 184). John Murray Press. Kindle Edition.

• The "Amen" also reminds us that we can trust God to act on our prayers. It can be tempting to doubt whether our puny attempts of prayer truly make a difference. Our prayers change the world, change the circumstances of other people, and, most fundamentally, they change us.

‘Prayers are prophecies,’ says Mark Batterson. ‘They are the best predictors of your spiritual future. Who you become is determined by how you pray. Ultimately, the transcript of your prayers becomes the script of your life.’

• Pete's final admiration in his book is to remember to keep prayer simple. Is my hope that having read the book I will find my prayer life deep and, more powerful and more meaningful, but is important also to not overthink a relationship.

C.H. Spurgeon said that ‘Prayer itself is an art only the Holy Spirit can teach us. Pray for prayer. Pray until you can really pray.’

The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. (Rom. 8:26–27)

• To summarise the book let me quote Pete's own summary:

‘Pause’. Try to ‘be still and know’ God (Ps. 46:10).

‘Rejoice … always’ (Phil. 4:4). Your Father in heaven loves you, knows you, and interprets your heart perfectly. Give him thanks!

‘Ask and it will be given to you’ (Matt. 7:7). Ask the Father for everything from peace in the Middle East to parking spaces.

‘Yield’. Offer every part of yourself to him as an instrument of righteousness’ (Rom. 6:13). Wait and trust for the light and hope to come.

He himself is my contemplation. He is my delight. Him for His own sake I seek above me. From Him Himself I feed within me. He is the field in which I labour. He is my cause. He is my effect. He is my beginning. He is my end. He is for me eternity. (p. 131)

• Questions for discussion:

mccx, Malcolm Cox, Watford, Croxley Green, teaching, preaching, spiritual disciplines, public speaking, corporate worship, Sunday Sample, Corporate Worship Matters, Tuesday Teaching Tips, Quiet Time Coaching, coaching, coaching near me, coach, online coaching, savior, quiet time, devotion, God, Jesus, Pray, prayer, malcolm’s, cox,

How many books have you read on prayer? I have lost count. But that's OK. We have never grasped all there is to learn about prayer, because the subject is God.

Some of the books on my shelf are theologically deep and philosophically complex. This is not one of those. Not to say that it is shallow. Not at all. Rather, it is deceptive in its simplicity.

Pete puts it this way in his introduction:

"When one of our sons heard that I was writing a book about how to pray, he said, ‘Oh, but that’s easy. You just say, “Dear God”, chat to him for a bit, and then say Amen.’ In a way, he was right. Sometimes we make prayer way more complicated than it needs to be. How to Pray has been written as ‘a simple guide for normal people’." Greig, Pete. How to Pray: A Simple Guide for Normal People (p. 14). John Murray Press. Kindle Edition.What made this a more interesting book to read that some, is that I know the author's brother. James Greig and I served together on staff of a church for quite some time. I thoroughly enjoyed James' Biblical teaching. A gifted and intelligent teacher. I never got to know his brother - until now. At least, I know him now in the sense that I've read his book, and feel I have shared his life.

Pete opens up his heart, his life and his prayers.

Today's show notes will contain less detail than other recordings. The reason for this is because I have podcasted extensively on the book in my other series, "Quiet Time Coaching". In my review of the book as a whole here, I shall do my best to give you my overall impressions of the book and what it has done for me.

The core of the book is an exposition of the acronym capitalise P. R. A. Y. Standing for pause, rejoice, ask, yield. The key text is what is known as the Lord's prayer from Matthew chapter 6.

Each chapter of the book concludes with some practical tips and further resources which can be found on the prayer course website.

Before I finish, I'd like to add how much it's been useful to me to discuss the book as part of a bookclub. In this case, the Renovare bookclub. Talking with half a dozen other people every other week about what they find meaningful has helped me to deepen my thinking about what God is teaching me. As I hear other people share, I had God's voice through them. If you have never been part of a bookclub like this, I thoroughly recommend it.

Please add your comments on this week’s topic. We learn best when we learn in community.

Do you have a question about teaching the Bible? Is it theological, technical, practical? Send me your questions or suggestions. Here’s the email: [email protected].

If you’d like a copy of my free eBook on spiritual disciplines, “How God grows His people”, sign up at my website: http://www.malcolmcox.org.

Please pass the link on, subscribe, leave a review.

“Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” (Psalms 100:2 NIV11)

God bless, Malcolm

Introduction

They may forget what you said – but they will never forget how you made them feel. Carl W. Buechner

Parsons, Rob. The Heart of Communication: How to really connect with an audience . John Murray Press. Kindle Edition.

Rob quotes John Maxwell who said, "Everyone communicate, few connects."

---

Know your audience

"...if you really want to connect with the audience there is something you must do before you open your mouth to speak, and preferably before you even start preparing: you have to know them."

- It might seem rather obvious, but if we don't know our audience, we are going to find it especially difficult to connect.

- If you speak to the same people most of the time, you may have the illusion you know them. But that's not necessarily the case. And even if you do know them, as we prepare lessons, we must bring them to mind rather than simply tell them what the passage says, or the topic expresses.

- If you are a Visiting Speaker, connect with the organiser of the event, or some of the people who will be there in advance. As Rob says:

"Try to get an understanding of the diversity of people to whom you will be speaking, and ask what it is the organisers are hoping to get from your visit – get some colour."

- Arrive early, mingle with the people. If you are speaking online, log in early. I generally arrive 30 minutes early to physical or online meetings. Chat with whoever is there. If no one has arrived, I pray or look over my notes.

---

Don't waste the start

- Don't ramble. Pay respect to your audience in telling them something significant in your first phrase. A surprising statement, an intriguing question – these will help your audience to look forward to what you have to say.

- You may want to prepare that first sentence or two.

- On occasion, introducing yourself with more detail can be appropriate. Have a look at teaching tip 225 regarding the topic of ethos for more on that issue.

"Introductions need to be effective, but not too long. Renowned nineteenth-century preacher C.H. Spurgeon summed it up well: ‘It is always a pity to build a great porch to a little house.’"

---

Get people on the bus

- Don't assume everybody in your audience is at the same place in life. The married and the unmarried, the older and younger, the newer and more mature Christian. All are different and have different needs.

- At least part of your introductory remarks should be aimed at getting everybody on board. This does not happen because we say people need to pay attention, but because we demonstrate that we have an awareness of the diversity of the audience.

- If you speak the same group every week, you will not need as much emphasis on this point. However, it's still worth covering every now and again.

---

Make them feel welcome

- Do not scold your audience. Be unreservedly positive towards them. If someone comes in late, don't put it out. Yes, I have done this, to my regret.

- On a memorable occasion a few years ago Some young children were running around at the back of the church hall shouting. It was distracting not only me as the speaker, but the congregation. Sometimes you have to press on regardless (the show must go on!), But this was not one of those times. I wasn't sure exactly what to do, because I didn't want the parents nor the children to feel excluded, judged or unwelcome. I did not know what was going on with that child. Perhaps they were ill. Perhaps the parent was ill. What I did, and people responded afterwards with a question that I approached it this way, was to say something like, "It sounds like some of our children need comforting. I wonder if that could be arranged?" I remember the collective "Hmmm" That came back from the congregation. It was not a response of anger or irritation, but one of approval.

- Avoid accusations towards your audience and pointing fingers. Use an open hand when making gestures. Avoid the "you" word as much as you can, and instead use, "we…us".

---

Conclusion

What are your thoughts on this question of connection? Are there times to point the finger? Are there times to be accusatory? Am I right about my emphasis? 

Questions: "What, in your experience, makes the biggest difference in connecting with your audience?"

---

Please add your comments on this week’s topic. We learn best when we learn in community.

Do you have a question about teaching the Bible? Is it theological, technical, practical? Send me your questions or suggestions. Here’s the email: [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]).

If you’d like a copy of my free eBook on spiritual disciplines, “How God grows His people”, sign up at my website: http://[www.malcolmcox.org](http://www.malcolmcox.org/).

Please pass the link on, subscribe, leave a review.

“Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” (Psalms 100:2 NIV11)

God bless, Malcolm

“And there were shepherds living out in the fields nearby, keeping watch over their flocks at night. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were terrified. But the angel said to them,

“Do not be afraid. I bring you good news that will cause great joy for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is the Messiah, the Lord.This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger.”

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favour rests.”

When the angels had left them and gone into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let’s go to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has told us about.”

So they hurried off and found Mary and Joseph, and the baby, who was lying in the manger. When they had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.

The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.” (Luke 2:8–20 NIV11) https://accordance.bible/link/read/NIV11-GK#Luke_2:8

QUESTION: Something nice you stumbled across in an unlikely place?

QUESTION: Manger X 3 - why?

QUESTION: Biggest or loudest concert you’ve ever attended?

Suggestion: use the ‘examen’ explained in my QTC podcast going out on 24 Jan. If you want it earlier I’ll send you a copy.

Three options:

Question 1 : Share about something in your Christian life which at first provoked fear in you, but led to joy. What have you been afraid of which turned out to be a blessing

Question 2 : Share about a time when talking about Jesus came naturally to you

Instead of an article this week I'm going to give you the outline of a devotional I'm planning to share with the parents of the Watford church this coming Wednesday. You are getting an advanced sneak peak! Even if you are not a parent, I think you will find something helpful here. The compassion of God and the faithfulness of Joseph are an inspiration.

Subject: How to strengthen the spirituality of our children during the pandemic

Objective: Helping parents feel supported and equipped in an unprecedented situation

Introduction

QUESTION: What has gone well with parenting your children during COVID-19?

A Family Under Threat

Matthew 2:13-15

“When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. “Get up,” he said, “take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him.” So he got up, took the child and his mother during the night and left for Egypt, where he stayed until the death of Herod. And so was fulfilled what the Lord had said through the prophet: “Out of Egypt I called my son.”” (Matthew 2:13–15 NIV11)

Matthew 2:19-21

“After Herod died, an angel of the Lord appeared in a dream to Joseph in Egypt and said, “Get up, take the child and his mother and go to the land of Israel, for those who were trying to take the child’s life are dead.” So he got up, took the child and his mother and went to the land of Israel.” (Matthew 2:19–21 NIV11)

Two or three couples with parents of similar-aged children.

Suggested starter-questions:

Everyone back together

QUESTION: What did we find helpful in our conversations in the breakout rooms?

What do you think of this devotional? If you have any suggestions for me, I'd be glad to hear them. If you can send them to me between now and Wednesday evening that would be even better. Then I can incorporate them in the actual event.

Take a look at this flyer for a teaching conference coming up in March 2021. I registered this week. I heartily recommend anyone with an interest in these matters to do so.

Register here: https://www.teleiossociety.com

Penny and I have been asked to teach at the conference. More details coming soon. However, the focus will centre on the connection between theology, ecology and God's vision for this earth. Please pray for us as we prepare. 

If you'd like to pray for me I'd be very grateful. Here are some of my plans:

Until the next time, 

God bless, Malcolm

"Enemy-occupied territory, that is what this world is. Christianity is the story of how the rightful king has landed, you might say landed in disguise, and is calling us to take part in a great campaign of sabotage." (C.S. Lewis – Mere Christianity) Greig, Pete. How to Pray: A Simple Guide for Normal People (p. 162). John Murray Press. Kindle Edition.

• There is no question that we are at war. It is a question of whether we understand our enemy, and our power. What do we do when we sense the need to engage in some prayer for spiritual warfare? Martin Luther said this:

"We must all practise violence and remember that he who prays is fighting against the devil and the flesh. Satan is opposed to the church … the best thing we can do, therefore, is to put our fists together and pray."

• What does this kind of praying look like? Pete Greg offers the following suggestions:

Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. (1 Pet. 5:8)

• Jesus knew he had an enemy, and he knew who he was. He was aware of his schemes. And those schemes were not just theoretical, but personal.

Jesus warned Peter that ‘Satan has asked to sift all of you as wheat’ (we can only guess how he knew). ‘But I have prayed for you … that your faith may not fail.’

• Jesus knew he would be victorious over the devil, but he wanted his followers to share in that victory. Therefore, he prayed for them.

Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. (Eph. 6:12)

• What tools do we have in this battle? Pete Greig suggests fasting.

Fasting can help to focus our prayers the way a magnifying glass focuses sunlight to start a fire. This might mean going without food, sex, social media or even, in Daniel’s case, soap!

‘God raised us up with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms’ (Eph 2:6).

• If we are with Christ and in Christ (a term used 164 times in the New Testament), we share in his authority on some level. As Pete puts it:

In prayer we are learning to rule and reign with Christ.

• How do you feel about praying "deliver us from evil"? What are we praying for when we make this request? We,

"...inhale the victory of the cross, and thereby .. hold the line for another moment, another hour, another day, against the forces of destruction within ourselves and the world.’ Tom Wright

• Our prayers to defeat evil are needed urgently. They are for this time, not for eternity. They must be uttered now (Rev 12:12),

Like a wounded and cornered animal, Satan thrashes around desperately with the aim of injuring as many of his enemy as possible, before his own destruction

In Christ we are called to extend the Pax Christus as an army of peace-makers commissioned to convey ‘the gospel of peace’ to all the earth.

mccx, Malcolm Cox, Watford, Croxley Green, teaching, preaching, spiritual disciplines, public speaking, corporate worship, Sunday Sample, Corporate Worship Matters, Tuesday Teaching Tips, Quiet Time Coaching, coaching, coaching near me, coach, online coaching, savior, quiet time, devotion, God, Jesus, Pray, prayer, malcolm’s, cox,

Today I bring you an interview with my new friend, J. Tyrone Marcus. 

He is the author of, "Unbeatable: seven pillars of personal excellence". I reviewed the book in, "What we are reading: Episode 50".

I hope you will enjoy this entertaining chat. We explore the background to his motivation in writing the book, and his vision for its impact.

This version of the interview focuses on the book. I will post a longer version which includes our conversation which went off on some interesting tangents on topics of reading, spiritual formation, spiritual disciplines and much more.

I hope you enjoy the interview. If you feel moved to purchase the book and read it, please let me know in what way it has an impact on you. I'd like to forward that on to Tyrone.

One of my hopes in recording interviews and reviewing books is that it inspires more of us to write. It is said that everybody has a book in them. I think that's true for most people. Is it true for you?

Please add your comments on this week’s topic. We learn best when we learn in community. 

Do you have a question about teaching the Bible? Is it theological, technical, practical? Send me your questions or suggestions. Here’s the email: [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]). 

If you’d like a copy of my free eBook on spiritual disciplines, “How God grows His people”, sign up at my website: http://[www.malcolmcox.org](http://www.malcolmcox.org/). 

Please pass the link on, subscribe, leave a review. 

“Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” (Psalms 100:2 NIV11) 

God bless, Malcolm

Tuesday Teaching Tip 226

Introduction

Designing a presentation without an audience in mind is like writing a love letter and addressing it: To Whom It May Concern. Ken Haemer Parsons, Rob. The Heart of Communication: How to really connect with an audience . John Murray Press. Kindle Edition.

Ordinary people

“Jesus spoke the word to them, as much as they could understand. He did not say anything to them without using a parable.” (Mark 4:33–34)

• Rob relates that these words changed the way he spoke forevermore:

‘Remember that when you preach, you will be speaking to ordinary people.’

• What does this mean in practice? Two things to bear in mind:

Conclusion

Questions: "Do you know your tendency? Is it to be too intellectual, or not intellectual enough? If there was a group in your congregation who might tend to miss out because of your approach, who might they be? What could you do to correct this?"

Please add your comments on this week’s topic. We learn best when we learn in community.

Do you have a question about teaching the Bible? Is it theological, technical, practical? Send me your questions or suggestions. Here’s the email: [email protected].

If you’d like a copy of my free eBook on spiritual disciplines, “How God grows His people”, sign up at my website: http://www.malcolmcox.org.

Please pass the link on, subscribe, leave a review.

“Worship the LORD with gladness; come before him with joyful songs.” (Psalms 100:2 NIV11)

God bless, Malcolm

PS: You might also be interested in my book: "An elephant's swimming pool", a devotional look at the Gospel of John

mccx, Malcolm Cox, Watford, Croxley Green, teaching, preaching, spiritual disciplines, public speaking, corporate worship, Sunday Sample, Corporate Worship Matters, Tuesday Teaching Tips, Quiet Time Coaching, coaching, coaching near me, coach, online coaching, savior, quiet time, devotion, God, Jesus, Pray, prayer, malcolm’s, cox,