Why do negative emotions stick around longer than positive ones? 

 

It’s because we’re wired with a negativity bias. It’s nature’s way of keeping us safe. But it doesn’t feel good.

 

Negative emotions have a way of spiraling into more than just negative feelings. What may start out as a negative emotion can lead to a limiting belief, an away-from orientation, negative outcomes, fewer resources, and even a general place of disempowerment that doesn’t feel good.

 

Don’t get the idea that negative emotions are useless — they’re not! In fact, they’re a valuable form of communication from your unconscious mind. And when handled effectively, they can, in a roundabout way, help reorient you in a better direction. 

 

While your life is an emotional and spiritual journey, we usually have to take action to feel better.

 

• Recognize that emotions — negative and positive ones — are going to happen. Emotions are part of being human.
• Try to observe your emotions at a distance. It may help to imagine that you’re floating above the event or watching it on a movie screen.
• Identify the emotions. Writing them down may help.
• Acknowledge and take ownership of your emotions. This is especially important if other people are involved. Someone else may have done something, but the emotions are yours. Own them.
• Take responsibility for what you feel. 
• Honor the emotions as communication from your unconscious mind.
• Explore, "What is this telling me? What is this alluding to? What’s the evidence here that supports the emotion?"
• Then explore, "So this is what I'm feeling. What would make it better?” And believe that better is possible.
• Interrupt the pattern of negative emotions with thinking, “reject-delete,” dancing, reciting a mantra like “this too shall pass,” jumping jacks — whatever gets you in a good mood.
• After the negative emotion has passed, identify the trigger. 
• Then focus on intentionally and consistently creating positive states. This will put you at cause.

 

The purpose of all this is to help you feel better. Because when you can feel better, you can do better.

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