Married Under The Influence

Binge-worthy stories about marriage, arguing efficiently, and sharing a small space in the big city. Add in isolation during a global pandemic and we've got some stories to tell and tips to share. Plus if you're interested in what the last 12 weeks looked like in terms of sports and pop culture, we've got you covered.

This week in sports we chat about the New Orleans Saints taking up residence at a brewery for the NFL Draft (maybe they've been listening to our podcast?). We chat about the pop culture shift from celebrity news to everyday-people news, and how much we appreciate all of the good humans of the world who's stories are going viral. Oh, and we can't forget Tiger King.

We hope you'll catch up with us! Cheers!

Can you pay my bills (can you pay my telephone bills)?

78% of Americans live paycheck to paycheck, 48% of couples argue over finances, and 60% say they don't like their partners spending habits. Eek. If money has felt like a taboo subject to you, whether you're married or not, we're sharing money tips that have helped us succeed. Especially in times like this of financial uncertainty, it's important to know how to manage your money and how to best make it work for you. Special thanks to our friend Diana (@DebtFreeDiana on Facebook) for being a constant resource on our own money journey! 

Whew, talking budgets is heavy. So we kept it to lighting rounds of sports and pop culture this week - with a few stories that are bound to put a smile on your face. Including: how you can apparently bet on Madden games now, and how Chrissy Teigan exchanged a loaf of bread for Romaine lettuce in a parking lot via a Twitter connection. (Don't worry, the exchange was made at a 6-foot distance.)

NYC Coronavirus Update. We're living in one of the biggest cities in the world, but are isolated to the smallest square footage we've ever lived in. We talk about how both of us are working from home in 450 square feet, and how we're surviving the quarantine. Hint: there's a lot of beer involved.

We also share tips on successfully working from home. We talk about what's working for us, and why it's important to get on a routine, get outside, get some darn clothes on to start your day. 

Also, Kelsey had to take a mental health day this week, and we both learned a lot from it. We learned to reset, take a step away from the news and social media, and how to reframe our mindset. While we're all dealing with uncertainty and disappointment from cancelled events from the coronavirus, it's important to remember that we're not in charge of the news or what we see on social media, but we are in charge of our reaction to it. So even when it's not easy, it's important that we all choose to feel positive and spread positivity. We're all in this together. *Cue the High School Musical theme music.* [00:00 - 23:12]

SPORTS: Tom Brady has officially left the New England Patriots. Why Kelsey will still buy a Tom Brady Bucs jersey, why John thinks Brady is forcing Chris Godwin out of Tampa Bay, and why we're all relying on NFL Free Agency to keep our sports hopes alive for 2020 [23:13 - 32:12] 

POP CULTURE: Bachelor news is slim this week after production of Clare's season was postponed due to the coronavirus. Hannah B and Tyler C are making waves down in Florida. (Pun intended.) But our favorite pop culture news this week was positive showing of affection during social distancing. Sure, we're physically not able to be together - but the beauty in that is finding ways to show love even when we are forced to be apart. Tune in for some of our favorite stories. [32:13 - 37:58]

Our first remote episode! We're traveling to Ocean City, MD for St. Patrick's Day, but, like most events right now -- our parade was cancelled. It brought up the conversation about how we feel about Coronavirus, as well as what plans we have for an emergency situation. Do you have a plan for you and your family when sh*t hits the fan?

We chat about family traditions, and how as a married couple it's important to balance the traditions you have with your families vs. the traditions you want to start as a family of your own. Splitting time between families is hard, so how do you make it all work? [00:00 - 21:15]

Since sports is cancelled (literally) we'll jump right into The Bachelor. The star of the show (for better or for worse) was Barb, Peter's Mom. How do we feel about a Mom completely turning on her son on live TV, and putting his young-20-something love interest on blast? We find out on this season's MOST DRAMATIC FINALE EVER of The Bachelor. [21:16 - 39:14]

Tune in next week for talk of budgeting and money - which is not always easy as a couple to talk about, but something we feel is so very necessary.

Thank you for 1,000 listens to Married Under the Influence! We are so happy to have you here! It feels appropriate to celebrate with a beer from one of our favorite breweries, Cushwa Brewing in Williamsport, MD! Cheers! 

John and I are trying to eat healthy. We legitimately text about it during the days. So when Kelsey posed a question to John about drinking calories or eating calories for the rest of our lives, it only made sense to tackle a fun game on the podcast: “Would You Rather: Hangry Edition.” Play along with us on Instagram! [00:00 – 20:28]

Shaquille O’Neal has gnarly hair after losing a bet. (Oh speaking of hair, John’s mustache is still sticking around, despite Kelsey’s wishes.) A kid named Snacks is living the dream after an epic three-point shot. And most importantly – join us on our ESPN Bracket Challenge “MarriedUnderTheInfluence”! It’s free to join and play along, and the winner will get a free NYC beer sent to them by us! [20:29 – 27:16] 

We are sending our love and prayers to Nashville after devastating tornados this week. We finished Love Is Blind on Netflix, and couldn’t have predicted which couples would still be together at the end of the season. We talk Hilary Duff’s plea to sell her Lizzie McGuire reboot to Hulu. Are reboots successful or unsuccessful twenty years after their initial airing? Would Friends be as good if it came back for a whole season? The Dixie Chicks are back, and now their opinions seem to have a place in a new technological world of social media. Lastly, we are still #TeamMadison as Pilot Pete tries to follow his heart on The Bachelor, and we are excited for Clare as The Bachelorette. (Also excited that The Bachelor chose to tackle hate speech in a profound way.) [27:17 – 47:30] 

Thanks for being here, cheers! 

Do you give up something for lent each year? John has vivid memories of this growing up. We chose to give up white potatoes, and we had to be very specific because Johnny boy kept wanting to find loop holes. #mashedpotatoes Let us know what you're giving up so we can follow along with you! Special thanks to Jeff + Meaghan who provided us with this week's beers - an ode to our dating days and living in separate cities with a beer from Black Flag Brewing in Columbia, MD and Eastern Shore Brewing Co in Maryland. 

[00:00 - 13:00]

Lots of feel good stories in the sports world this week. NHL goalies are grabbed from the sidelines. MLB players grow up to be cowboys. Softball players are (still) badass. Also, apparently Kelsey is manifesting a scandalous occupation that involves cash raining down on her without even knowing it. Send help.

[13:01 - 24:38]

We're hooked on Love is Blind on Netflix and it has left us with many questions, perhaps the most burning one: do you let your dog drink from your glass, and then continue drinking from it? Also, we are wholeheartedly #TeamMadison on The Bachelor and hope that Peter is able to win her back. We had high hopes for Peter this season, but when he says he likes everything about Victoria (aka Vicki F) MINUS the talking and communication, we have to wonder if that accident he had with the golf cart messed with his head a little. Hard to believe we're almost to the end of this season, ya'll.

[24:39 - 41:37]

How important is a routine to a healthy relationship? What's in a routine that makes it successful? We share our woes about feeling in a funk and trying to get back into a healthy routine including, diet, working out and most importantly - SLEEP. Also: We talk about how pick up basketball has now brought its beauty to the NBA, why it's never ok to hurl tiny balls at other humans, and why this season of The Bachelor is truly the most puzzling at all. Who is more confused - the producers or Pete? Perhaps most importantly, John has shaved his beard and now has just a mustache, and Kelsey is scarred for life.  

Marriage Topic 

We are realizing: a healthy routine is crucial to the success of our marriage. A coffee tastes better when we can drink it together while watching the morning news together (ok, boomer). You can't be a night owl and an early riser at the same time. Working out and packing our lunches saves us money and makes us more responsible humans.

[00:00-17:52]

Sports

We discuss: why we love the new rules of the NBA All Star Game. Why we think the cheaters in the MLB should be penalized, not the retaliators (even though BOTH are wrong). Why Tom Brady isn't going to go to the Cowboys, but why it would be a beautiful thing for our marriage if he did.

[17:53 - 32:55]

Pop Culture 

We feel like: Netflix is having a Reality TV Moment (hello, Love Is Blind!). The Bachelor wouldn't be as good if we could binge watch it. We're very confused by Pilot Pete (and tbh he's probably confused by himself, too). Plus: John's new facial hair situation is forcing Kelsey to wear a blindfold 24/7. 

[32:56 - 41:09]

Living in NYC has been a dream. We've had to learn to be minimalists, learn to be extra patient when spending 6-8 hours each week trying to park the car, and we've checked a lot of things off of our own NYC bucket lists. Saturday Night Live, several morning shows, and lots of Christmas festivities later, we're feeling right at home in the concrete jungle. We are also sharing tips on what to download and who to follow when visiting the Big Apple! [00:00 - 21:07] 

Baseball season has officially started with pitchers and catchers reporting! We talk the excitement of being able to see local baseball in two incredible stadiums within the city. We're also excited for college basketball, specifically March Madness, but it is imperative for John that he beats Kelsey in this bracket challenge or his self esteem will have officially completely diminished. [21:08 - 26:30]

It was a big week for movie fans with the 92nd Academy Awards! Big winners of the night were Renee Zellweger, Joaquin Phoenix and 'Parasite.' Losers of the night were Kelsey and John, who only picked 10 and 7 correct awards respectively. Recycled dresses were a hit on the red carpet (who said re-wearing wasn't cool?!) and Natalie Portman wore the names of snubbed female Oscar Nominees sewn into her dress (#badass). Pilot Pete continues to struggle to find his wife, as the women break down, bicker and drink their sorrows away. Kelsey is down to just one dog in the fight (Madison!) while John has officially taken the lead in the Bachelor Draft to the point of no return. We discuss what we think of the remaining women, while remembering that just weeks ago, Peter could have run away with Hannah B and never looked back. We wonder how he's feeling about that choice now, as inevitable drama creeps in. At least he's got the forehead scar to prove the journey. [26:31 - 45:24]

We're drinking beer and trying to manifest some wintry weather in NYC. We're also sharing some ideas for Valentine's Day with your partner! This year we each planned a Valentine's Day Date (shocker: they both involve visiting breweries) and talk about why it's always fun to add in activities and thoughtful games to keep your partner on their toes. We're talking speed dating, scavenger hunts, and more. [00:00 - 18:01] 

The Super Bowl left some to be desired game-wise, but what one of us DID love was winning all of the in-game bets. (Hint: it wasn't John.) We address the controversy surrounding the Half Time show and why both of us would have let our (future) children watch it. In other football news - John is excited for the XFL, but due to wanting less concussed humans walking around America, Kelsey is not. [18:02 - 33:02]

We'll be doing a 5.5 episode where we reveal our Oscar picks for 2020! If you're a movie buff, stay tuned for that .5 episode! Pilot Pete is doing the best he can to follow his heart, but we think his heart wants basically whatever the girls in the house want. (We also think he is a Peacemaker, Enneagram #9.) John has taken a 10 point lead in The Bachelor Draft standings, and it's going to take a miracle for Kelsey to catch up with the squad that she has left. [33:03 - 40:51]

If you have a minute - please rate and review the podcast! You can also follow along on Instagram: @kelsinthecity, @john.lorman, @marriedundertheinfluence! 

Relationships are hard. They're even harder when you see everyone's 'perfect' highlight reel on social media. We talk about one celebrity couple's choice to display their raw and ugly moments, and why it's healthy to communicate through the moments that aren't so pretty. We also openly discuss what we think we fight over most, and why we should maybe get a dog after every argument ends. Hashing out arguments and airing out emotions is key to moving forward in a successful relationship. After all, fighting in 450sqft may not be easy, but someone's gotta do it. [00:00 - 13:55] 

The tragic loss of Kobe Bryant, his daughter, and seven other passengers in a helicopter crash stopped the world in its tracks. We talk about the heaviness in the air surrounding this tragedy, and why the loss of him as a superstar, a father and a husband should make us all take a beat and feel thankful for the time we've had and treasure the time we've got left. We also discuss what flavor the Gatorade Bath will be at the Superbowl, who will win the coin toss, and other things that will keep us entertained during the NFL's biggest game of the year. [13:56 - 29:28]

The Grammys were heavy and emotional, but one of the best we've seen in a few years. Alicia Keys is the host we all deserve, and her ability to sit down at the piano and sing to our souls is something we both have a crush on. Demi Lovato showed an incredible sign of strength, and Camilla Cabello sang to her dad and melted us into puddles on the floor. Pete the Bachelor is in hot water with all of his girlfriends for allowing a rejected suitor to return, and producers stooped to their lowest level of manipulation for this week's one-on-one. (Oh, and John took a commanding lead in The Bachelor Draft).[29:29 - 39:18]