Every time I learn more about Attachment Theory, it feels so eye-opening. It explains so much about me and my Mastermind moms. I hear it when we talk about how we were raised, how we relate to our parents, and how we’ve tried to fill the spaces we feel in our hearts. 

Building a secure attachment style is so important for who our kids will become in the future. But many of us are out here trying to figure out our own - let’s say “less than ideal”- attachment issues. How can we do even better for them?

My fave sage of attachment and healing, Kirby, is back to help us break it down and build it up. He says the key to security is an environment where kids feel safe to feel and express themselves, and he’s going to help us figure out how to create that space for our kids. You don’t want to miss this one!

Something clicked while listening?

We’d love to talk with you if you want to dig deeper into your family’s specific situation. If you’re ready to stop guessing and start knowing what works, it might be worth a conversation. https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ 

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-328

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now in his 20’s, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

About Kirby Fling

Kirby is the creator of the Two Mind Method, a practical, heart-centered approach to healing attachment wounds and reshaping nervous system patterns. Drawing on years of deep personal research, lived experience, and work with clients, Kirby specializes in helping people build healthier relationships with themselves and others. His work is grounded, accessible, and refreshingly real, offering tools that truly work in the messiness of real life. Kirby brings a unique blend of neurophysiology, trauma awareness, and emotional attunement to the table, empowering people to transform their inner world and their closest connections.

Kirby’s Web and Social Links

Website: https://TwoMindMethod.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TwoMindMethod

Instagram: https://instagram.com/TwoMindMethod

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@twomindmethod

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TwoMindMethod

Resources Discussed/Links

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

I’ve got a bite-sized treat of an episode for you this week. I was recently coaching a Mastermind mama who’s struggling with the changing relationship with her own mother. 

As she changes, her relationship with her mom is changing too. 

And change is hard and can even feel scary. Especially when it feels like the people closest aren’t necessarily thrilled about the changes we are making in our lives. 

As I listened to her story, I knew exactly what she was going through. And I also felt like it would be relevant to you, no matter where you are in your parenting journey.

Something clicked while listening?

We’d love to talk with you if you want to dig deeper into your family’s specific situation. If you’re ready to stop guessing and start knowing what works, it might be worth a conversation. https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/ 

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-327

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now in his 20’s, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

Resources Discussed/Links

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

You think you’re parenting with one mind.

You’re not.

There’s the mind that reads the books and makes the plans. And there’s the other mind—the one running the show when your kid does that thing that makes your jaw clench and chest tighten.

Kirby Fling sees this clearly. His Two-Mind Method helps you understand the two versions of yourself that show up every day. The one that wants to be patient. And the one that actually is patient.

The difference? That’s where attachment gets stronger. Where families find their rhythm. Where the hard moments become growth moments.

Something clicked while listening?

We’d love to talk with you if you want to dig deeper into your family’s specific situation. If you’re ready to stop guessing and start knowing what works, it might be worth a conversation. 

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-326

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now in his 20’s, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

About Kirby Fling

Kirby is the creator of the Two Mind Method, a practical, heart-centered approach to healing attachment wounds and reshaping nervous system patterns. Drawing on years of deep personal research, lived experience, and work with clients, Kirby specializes in helping people build healthier relationships with themselves and others. His work is grounded, accessible, and refreshingly real, offering tools that truly work in the messiness of real life. Kirby brings a unique blend of neurophysiology, trauma awareness, and emotional attunement to the table, empowering people to transform their inner world and their closest connections.

Kirby’s Web and Social Links

Website: https://TwoMindMethod.com

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TwoMindMethod

Instagram: https://instagram.com/TwoMindMethod

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@twomindmethod

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/TwoMindMethod

Resources Discussed/Links

The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D. https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748 

Attachment Disturbances in Adults: Treatment for Comprehensive Repair

by Daniel P. Brown PhD and David S. Elliott PhD https://www.amazon.com/Attachment-Disturbances-Adults-Treatment-Comprehensive/dp/0393711528/ 

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

I’ve been saying for a long, long time that raising kids in the digital age is like the Wild Wild West! We are all just trying to make the best decisions for our kids with the info we currently have at any given time. 

And it’s really hard to know what the right decision is when you’re a pioneer parent (as all of us are here - raising kids at a time in human history where tech is causing us to move at a more rapid pace than ever before). 

In his book “The Anxious Generation,” Jonathan Haidt pulls back the curtain on how online content streams and everywhere screens have changed the experience of growing up in a tech-addicted world.

Adolescence has always been a tough time for kids AND parents. They’re struggling with changing bodies, raging hormones, and the pressure to prepare for adulthood; we’re trying to find the balance between keeping them safe and letting them learn from their mistakes. But modern teens and tweens are surrounded by algorithmically curated content that’s targeted at their fears of inadequacy.

My daughter, Avery, and I lived through the explosion of social media targeted at teens. This time on the pod, we break down “The Anxious Generation,” and how Avery is one of the unfortunates described in the book - a card carrying member of The Anxious Generation. Sigh. 

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-325

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

Resources Discussed/Links

The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness, by Jonathan Haidt https://www.amazon.com/Anxious-Generation-Rewiring-Childhood-Epidemic/dp/0593655036

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

Gentle Parenting has become a sort of parenting movement over the last decade or so. 

I’ve been here for more than a hot minute and it’s interesting what I’ve noticed. You see, before Gentle there was Conscious Parenting and before that there was Love and Logic and and and. 

I think the original founders of these methods were probably drinking the same koolaid I like…we secretly want to raise our kids even better than our parents did. We want our kids to feel loved and enjoyed. We don’t want them to act like selfish creepos. We want them to become besties with their siblings and to have their backs. 

Of course, much fancier more formal lingo is typically used in the “parenting space”. And I think that’s a big part of the problem. Somewhere with all of these lofty movements, parents have become performative.  

Gentle Parenting has been twisted. The parents that come to work with me lately are more permissive than I’ve ever seen and more unpack-leader-y too.  They have lost their voice, their power and their family life seems tense and frankly, miserable. 

I believe it’s often a case of gentle parenting gone wrong. 

My guest this week is Avital Schreiber Levy. She’s a mom, author, parenting coach, and designer who knows how to navigate the traps that well-meaning moms and dads end up falling into. 

Avital pulls no punches as we dig into the good, the bad, and the ugly of current Gentle Parenting trends, and why feelings are important, but they can’t be the only thing guiding your child’s behavior. But it’s not all trash talk. She’s got real, practical alternatives and strategies you can use to give your family the Pack Leadership it deserves, with confidence, and without yelling or excessive guilt.

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-324

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

About Avital Schreiber Levy

Avital Schreiber Levy is the founder of Hi Fam and the author of Reclaim Play. She helps intentional mothers break free from modern parenting traps and build strong, values-driven families that feel peaceful, connected, and confident. Avital has helped over 100,000 parents in 100+ countries through her courses, YouTube channel, and live events. She’s a mother of five, and known for blending timeless wisdom with real-world tools that actually work.

Avital’s Web and Social Links

Website: www.hifam.com 

YouTube: @HiFamLife

Instagram: @HiFamLife

Resources Discussed/Links

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

The Coddling Of the American Mind, by Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt https://www.thecoddling.com/ 

The Karpman Drama Triangle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpman_drama_triangle 

Waking The Tiger by Dr. Peter Levine: https://www.amazon.com/Waking-Tiger-Healing-Peter-Levine/dp/155643233X

We want to raise “good kids.” Kids who are kind. Kids who share. Kids who can handle themselves in a respectable manner when they go over to a friend’s house for dinner. 

We don’t want our kids to be high maintenance or frankly, bratty.

We want to raise kids who can get along in the world, but we also want to raise kids whose behavior shows the world that we did a good job as parents.

You know what? That’s okay!

Listen in as Avery and I break down this question that has been popping up for tons of moms in my orbit. We talk about WHY it’s a good thing to teach your kids how to behave, and HOW you can encourage them in that direction (without turning them into a doormat). If you’ve been worried about raising picky, bossy, me-first kids, this is the episode for you!

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-323

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

Resources Discussed/Links

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

A common anxiety I often uncover with my moms is: Now that I know what I know about the dangers of tech… it just feels too late to change things with my kids.  

Maybe you read the NYT best seller, Anxious Generation,  and… let’s just say, you’re feeling VERY. FLIPPIN’. ANXIOUS. 

• You’re beginning to understand why your kids act like raccoons on meth when it comes to screens - (ipad, phone, tv, video games). 
• You might feel like it’s a lost cause and ask: Is it even possible to undo this obsession with all things screens?  

It can really feel like a no-win situation when the kids have been hooked on the iPad since preschool. “But the games were supposed to be educational!” Sigh. 

We didn’t know what we didn’t know…yet. None of us did. Or at least most of us didn’t. Plus, let’s be honest - we were tired and stressed and those digital babysitters came in handy. Personally, I often relied on them for my sanity. 

So what’s the solution? This is my main criticism of books like The Anxious Generation. Doctors, scientists and books are good at diagnosing the problem - but it leaves us parents with the problem of: Now what?!

The great news is you don’t have to do it all by yourself. This week I’m talking to Titania Jordan, CMO of Bark Technologies and author of Parental Control: A Guide to Raising Balanced Kids in the Digital Age. We break down the “now what” strategies and resources to roll this toxic pattern back.  

Time’s up Silicon Valley: We, the parents, are taking back the power of our kids’ developing brains. 

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-322

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 27, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@mastermindparenting 

About Titania Jordan:

Titania Jordan is the CMO and Chief Parent Officer of Bark Technologies, an internet safety solution that helps parents and schools keep 7.4 million children safer across social media, smartphones, text messaging, and email. She’s also the author of Parental Control: A Guide to Raising Balanced Kids in the Digital Age.

Titania’s Social Links

• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/titaniajordan/ 
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/titaniajordan/ 
• X: https://x.com/titaniajordan 
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TitaniaJordan 
• TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@titaniajordan 

Resources Discussed/Links

Get Titania’s Book: https://www.wiley.com/en-us/Parental+Control%3A+A+Guide+to+Raising+Balanced+Kids+in+the+Digital+Era-p-9781394256563

Bark Technologies: https://www.bark.us/ 

Mastermind Parenting Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

Spoiler alert! Ya’ll probably know that I LOVE a good TV show. A comfy blanket and a cozy watch is a reliable happy place for me. So when my family recommended the Netflix thriller, “Adolescence,” I have to say I was a little resistant. But eventually they convinced me, and I am SO GLAD they did!

“Adolescence” is a short 4-episode drama series about a teenage boy accused of murdering a girl in his class. But unlike most murder mysteries, this show really digs down into how a seemingly normal kid could become capable of committing such an awful crime. 

Critics and audiences are giving it rave reviews, and Avery and I want to tell you why. We talk about Avery’s experience growing up in the digital age, and how you can talk to your own kids about what awaits them online.

MAJOR SPOILERS in this one gang, so watch the show first, then enjoy our discussion. You’ll be glad you did!

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-321

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

Resources Discussed/Links

“Adolescence” on Netflix: https://www.netflix.com/title/81756069 

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

Raising a strong-willed kid is harder. Even draining sometimes.  

Sitting on the floor and playing with toys felt like the worst to me. I now realize that I found other playful ways to be with my kids… but I still sometimes feel a little guilty about not being a Barbie or Legos kind of mom.

So when Dr. Shawn Hondorp invited me on her podcast, The Innovative Therapist, to talk about play and pack leadership, I have to admit, I may have baby barfed a little. But I love Shawn, and I had so much fun working out a definition of Pack Leadership with her recently, that I knew I could trust we’d have a great conversation. And I was SO right.

It turns out that a playful attitude counts as playing with your kids. Woohoo. It is also a part of my personal recipe for Pack Leadership. 

It’s a great way of thinking about leadership in any context, and I think you’ll love this conversation as much as I did. I just love Shawn.  Enjoy!

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-320

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

About Dr. Shawn Hondorp

Dr. Shawn Hondorp is a clinical psychologist whose goal is to create safe learning environments for those who want to explore innovative approaches to healing, one authentic conversation at a time. Learn more about her work, and subscribe to The Innovative Therapist Podcast, at https://drshawnhondorp.com/ 

Resources Discussed/Links

Part 1 of our discussion, What Even Is Pack Leadership? https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-318 

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/

You want to help your kids succeed in school - that’s a given. 

School success is a big area of anxiety and worry I often see with parents I coach. Many well-intentioned parents get more and more involved in their kids’ homework - but more involvement often leads to more long term struggles.

Becoming the homework helpline might help get your kids’ grades up temporarily. But it also teaches them to rely on you instead of learning how to figure things out for themselves. 

There’s no opportunity for your kid to develop agency.

Without your constant concierge-level concern, the kid finds themselves flailing and potentially feeling like a failure. Obviously, this is the polar opposite of how you want them to feel. 

Avery is back and joining me this week to share her experiences with my less-than-obsessed attitude toward homework, and how it helped and possibly hindered her too! 

As always, thanks for listening. Head over to Facebook, where you can join my free group Mastermind Parenting Community. We post tips and tools and do pop-up Live conversations where I do extra teaching and coaching to support you in helping your strong-willed children so that they can FEEL better and DO better. If you enjoyed this episode and think that others could benefit from listening, please share it!

Get all the links, resources, and transcripts here: https://mastermindparenting.com/podcast-319

About Randi Rubenstein

Randi Rubenstein coaches parents raising strong-willed kids. Randi searched endlessly to find the magical resource that would help her own highly sensitive, strong-willed child. (He’s now 26, healthy and happy-ish:). She’s been passionate about helping other “cycle-breaker”  parents like herself for almost two decades.

Randi’s Web and Social Links

• Website: https://mastermindparenting.com/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mastermindparenting
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mastermind_parenting/

Resources Discussed/Links

Our 12-week Basics Bootcamp program is now available as a 100% online self-study course! https://mastermindparenting.com/minimasters/

Live assessment: https://mastermindparenting.com/live-assessment/