"I had been serving in a private chapel for 13 years and when I came back into the ward and sat there and felt the Spirit of the body of Christ in that ward I just started sobbing, I couldn't stop crying. It felt like I was immersed in an ocean of love and light because the body of Christ is so alive in Mormonism and in sacrament meeting."


Maxine, a historian and theologian, was excommunicated after publishing a book about early Mormon feminism. After years of studying other religions she was rebaptized into the LDS church.

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"I've read a lot about history, like the founding fathers and enlightenment and tried to really get into their heads of how they thought. I feel like they had a kind of expansive view of Christ. They thought that His teachings of the golden rule applied not only to bringing brownies to your neighbor, but also in big things like how you structure the government. I feel like what's happened over time is kind of a shrinkage where if you have problems with your plumbing, you call a plumber. You're not like, oh, let me go look in the Bible. Over time, I think what's happened is if you have an economics question or if you have an ethics question, you go to the economist, or you go to the ethicist. I feel like what's happened is that the influence that Jesus has and the gospel has is kind of shrinking as it's being crowded out by these secular theories, which again, if they pointed back to gospel truths, that would be okay, but they didn't seem to, at least in my opinion. So that was one last thing that just drove me crazy. I had to figure out who was right. Either the economists are right or Jesus is right. My money's on Jesus."


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Brett served a mission and went to BYU where he studied the sciences. He then became atheist and after years of thoughtful studying was reconciled to the gospel of Jesus Christ.

"There is a truth and there is a line. I did cross that line and I am back. Christ is our savior. He did do what he did. There is evil. I felt it. I felt it on a stage. I felt the coldness of being on that stage in front of an entity of evil spirits. I felt it to my core. It made me shake I felt it so much. I've also stood next to President Nelson. he came to our mission and I got to look at him and be with him. And I felt on fire. I felt calm. I felt peace. And so I knew at that moment, and this, by the way, was the week that President Monson had died and President Nelson was being put in as prophet."

Tony started to explore the New Age movement and found himself in a dark place. How the Book of Mormon brought him clarity.

"We need to learn how to let go of those things. We can't focus on the bad things. We have to move along. We have to move forward. It is hard. It is very, very hard. It's very challenging, but it's not impossible. I can tell you that it's not impossible. For those of you that are struggling with your testimonies and are questioning things about the church, ask Heavenly Father. You've got to get it from the direct source. Don't go looking at videos and don't go talking to people that you're not sure of. Just get down and ask God, because he will tell you and he has his own ways of telling you. It may not be something huge. He may not open the heavens to you with all this dramatic stuff that some of us are looking for. Sometimes it takes that one little small, tiny, still voice to resonate in our soul."

After experiencing the loss of his young son, Jason quit going to church. He suffered years of hardship, eventually leading him back to the temple with his family.

"I would tell my mom, it's just so enlightening. That's the only word I could think of when I would talk to her, that it's so enlightening. So I'm doing all these things, and everything at home is a big fat mess. But everything I was learning at church just all made sense. And it's funny because I had learned those things before, but now it was different because I was trying to gain my own testimony. Everything just clicked for me, the restoration made sense and I wanted to learn more. I really wanted the husband to go on this journey with me, but he just wasn't really having it. So things got pretty bad where I felt like he needed to move out. I remember every step I would take, I would pray like, 'okay, Heavenly Father, I think this is the right thing. I'm going to do it unless you tell me not to,' is usually how I would approach it. And every time I did that, it was almost right afterwards I would get some kind of confirmation blessing that told me yes."


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Joanne's marriage was failing, turning back to Jesus Christ gave her strength and the enlightenment she needed to change her life.

"In the New Testament there is a story where Jesus heals a blind man and it says: Whether he be a sinner or no, I know not: one thing I know, that, whereas I was blind, now I see. That's how it was for me, all the sudden it just hit me and I thought: I can't explain all these things, all I can say is I have felt God's love, I have felt Jesus's love and I have felt forgiven for my sins. I have felt the joy that comes from being able to change. I can't explain all these things, I can only know what has happened to me."





Despite having witnesses of God's love at a young age, Lance started struggling with his testimony as an elders quorum president. How focusing on the basics brought him clarity.

Maxine, a historian and theologian, was excommunicated after publishing a book about early Mormon feminism. After years of studying other religions she was rebaptized into the LDS church.

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