In this episode, MDAK and his brother Alex discuss sensitive topics such as domestic violence, sexual assault, and their father's behavior. They talk about the impact of childhood trauma, including the sexual assault they experienced and the long-term effects it had on their lives. They also discuss their father's claims of being a recovering alcoholic and heroin addict, questioning the authenticity of his addiction. They share their experiences with their father's changing personalities and manipulative behavior. Despite the challenges they faced, they reflect on the importance of forgiveness and letting go of anger for their own mental health. In this part of the conversation, Alex and Episode 5 discuss their ability to let go of anger and resentment for the sake of their own peace. They also talk about their experiences with emotional abuse and the impact it had on them. They share a disturbing incident involving explicit videos their father left in the VCR, highlighting his carelessness and disregard for their well-being. Alex then shares his experiences in foster care and the Boys' Ranch, discussing the challenges he faced and the lack of support he received. In this conversation, Alex shares his experiences of manipulation, abuse, and trauma during his time at the Boys Ranch. He talks about the initiation process he went through, the sexual abuse he endured, and the emotional scars that resulted from his upbringing. Despite the challenges he faced, Alex found solace in music and writing, which became his outlets for expression. He also emphasizes the importance of reaching out for help and not staying silent about these experiences.

In this episode, the host shares his experiences and challenges during his elementary school years. He discusses feeling out of place, being bullied, and struggling to fit in. He also talks about the dysfunctional dynamics in his family, including his father's abusive behavior and his mother's complicity. The host reflects on the manipulation and gaslighting he experienced, as well as the trauma caused by his father's violent actions. In this episode, the speaker shares the painful experiences of abuse and betrayal within their family. They recount instances of physical violence, emotional manipulation, and sexual harassment by their father. The speaker also discusses the lack of support from their mother and ecclesiastical leaders, who dismissed their claims and told them to obey their abusive father. The speaker reflects on the impact of these experiences on their self-image and their struggle with body image issues. They emphasize the importance of finding one's voice and standing up against abuse and mistreatment.

In this episode, MDAK discusses the traumatic experiences he went through as a child, including witnessing domestic violence and being exposed to his father's perverse behavior. He emphasizes the importance of setting boundaries and holding people accountable for their actions. MDAK also reflects on his deep love and respect for women and his commitment to treating them with dignity and kindness. In this part of the conversation, the speaker recounts the terrifying experiences of living with an abusive father. The father would stand in the doorway of their bedroom, enforcing strict rules and punishing them for any perceived infractions. The speaker also shares how their father had no patience for anything that didn't fit his agenda and would make up stories to make himself sound smart. The speaker's relationship with their extended family became a threat to their father, who quickly destroyed their confidence in those family members. The speaker also describes the violent and dangerous environment they lived in, with drugs, gang activity, and sex offenders in their apartment complex. They share a traumatic incident where their brother was brutally attacked by a group of older kids, and the speaker, in a state of shock, ran for help. The speaker also discusses the broken foster care system and the abuse their brother endured in foster homes. The speaker's father manipulated them into spying on their brother and reporting any rule-breaking, which the speaker now regrets. The episode ends with a teaser for the next episode, where the speaker will delve into a specific instance that weighs heavily on them.

Summary

In this episode, MDAK provides a trigger warning and dives into the details of their upbringing. They start by giving background information on their parents, including their dysfunctional homes and traumatic experiences. MDAK's father is described as a narcissist and pathological liar, making it difficult to piece together his true past. MDAK's mother also came from a dysfunctional home and experienced abuse from a previous partner. The episode ends with MDAK discussing the negative energy and paranormal experiences they and their brother had in their childhood home. The principal themes in this part of the conversation are the dysfunctional and unsanitary living conditions of the narrator's family, the violent altercation between the narrator's father and uncle, the traumatic dream experienced by the narrator, the sexual abuse inflicted by an older child, and the subsequent legal proceedings against the abuser's family. In this final part of the conversation, the speaker reflects on the impact of the abuse he experienced and the choices he made to break the cycle of abuse. He shares the emotional encounter he had with his abuser and the fear it brought up. The speaker also discusses the importance of empathy, compassion, and understanding in healing and breaking generational cycles of abuse. He emphasizes the need for action, accountability, and giving victims a voice. The speaker concludes by sharing personal milestones in his healing journey and expressing gratitude for the support he has received.

In the first episode of the MDAK Unfiltered Podcast, host MDAK (Michael David Adams Keene) introduces himself and shares his personal journey of growing up in a dysfunctional home and being involved in the Mormon Church. He discusses his struggles with mental health, including an undiagnosed intestinal disease that was later revealed to be post-traumatic stress disorder. MDAK emphasizes the importance of seeking professional help and shares his experience with therapy. He also expresses his desire to deconstruct beliefs, have honest conversations, and create a platform for open and unfiltered discussions.