It’s natural to feel doubt in parenting, work, and life. We all do. What matters is what we do with it, how we redirect it and believe in ourselves again.

Meet Donna Marie Post, a mother of one, who shed a part of her old self when she became a mom. It was a part of her she wasn't proud of, that was judgmental and unkind. It was a bully inside her own self—a voice many of us can relate to and none of us want our children to experience.

She started following her heart instead. She felt the pull to create a business that supports and encourages women.

Now, a year and a half later, she feels grateful for fulfilling work that helps others and in turn helps herself. The energy from doing work she loves positively flows into other areas of her life—bringing joy to her friendships, marriage, and parenting.

She talks about ‘the pause’ when dealing with self-doubt or any other limiting belief. With a pause, instead of reacting, we can we choose to reconnect inward. There, we find there real answers we seek and a quiet confidence to believe in ourselves.

Donna Marie speaks right from the heart, sharing fun and insightful ideas for how to juggle our busy lives more peacefully and successfully. We discuss:

• The drive behind I Admire U that uplifts and inspires others by sharing the stories of everyday woman achieving extraordinary things
• Looking inward instead of the internet for parenting answers
• Creating memories with our children but not getting too caught up in the milestones instead of the everyday moments
• How she juggles family, business, and self-care by creating a plan, being flexible with it, and clearly communicating it to  others
• Inspiration and ideas for someone who is thinking about starting their own business

Donna Marie shares also a wonderfully practical life recipe that can help all of us getting into a more positive mindset to start the new year.

I hope you enjoy this uplifting conversation with Donna Marie as much as I did.

Life Recipe: How to have a successful and peaceful year as a mom entrepreneur.

Ingredients:

1. Forgive. Forgive yourself for not always having it together.
2.  Invest. Invest in a supportive network, positive mindset, and growth.
3.  Listen. Listen to your feelings and do what feels good and aligns with your “why.”
4. Support. Support others around you, it is the best motivator!

Method:

Forgive yourself for not always having it together. If you fell asleep when you were supposed to email everyone back, forgot your kid’s doctor appointment, chose to stay in your pajamas versus attending a networking event, or haven’t made a home cook meal in two weeks; forgive yourself. You are human. I’m not saying you should throw all accountability and structure into the wind, but allow yourself the space to not get it right all the time.

Invest in things that help support your business goals. Invest in a supportive network of people that are like-minded that help cheer you on when you are feeling like a total louse or experiencing feelings of overwhelming doubt. Join a Facebook business group, a book club, or even better yet, start your own club of like-minded women. Invest in a positive mindset. Choose to make conscious efforts to delete that negative text, skip on commenting on that social media post that upsets you, send a handwritten thank you card, speak daily affirmations, and choose to talk about your family, dreams, and goals; opposed to talking about people or things that you can’t control. Invest in your personal growth. Read self-help books, attend discussions and workshops, read articles, register for a class, journal, or listen to a podcast. By doing this, it helps motivate you towards your business goals, and that type of positive energy overflows into your mom life.  

Listen to your feelings and do what feels good. Tune into what works for you, how you manage your goals to your dreams, and what works for your family. Do friends think your nuts for adding one more thing to your already full plate?  Do your parents think you’re nuts for registering for graduate school with two young kids? Do your peers think you’re insane for taking such a huge risk? What matters is how you feel. What is your why? Tap into your feelings and your “why” and do what aligns with it. Most importantly, don’t apologize for it.

Support others around you, it is the best motivator! When you are in a fear valley, a creative rut, or binging on episodes of doubt; go out and do good. Sign-up for that hip hop class with your friend who used to dream of choreographing videos back in the day, watch a play with your mom who is taking local acting classes, or volunteer your wisdom and time to a women-owned business. Start the cycle of support, or pay it forward if you are on the receiving end. It will inspire your business dreams and your kids will think you’re amazing.

Bio

Donna Marie grew up in Alaska, and always day dreamed of a faster pace, the buzz of city life. She followed her dreams across the nation to study Fashion in Atlanta and intern with Elite Model Management. Over the course of the following fifteen years, Donna Marie worked for top fashion companies including: Versace, Giorgio Armani, Wilhelmina Models, and Prada. Her nomadic spirit led her to Miami, the Caribbean, and Chicagoland, where she currently resides. Being raised by two entrepreneurs, it was no surprise Donna Marie has explored different business ventures, including: wardrobe consultation, freelance writing, professional speaking, and jewelry design. Aside from her career, Donna Marie married her husband, Craig, in 2010. Two years later, they welcomed their baby boy, Truman. After becoming a parent, Donna Marie felt a spiritual pull to do something that would make a difference, to start I Admire U. As the Founder, she hopes the positive energy that radiates from each of the interviews, breeds positivity online. Her goal is to encourage others to not only celebrate themselves, but to celebrate awesome everyday women all over the nation!

Could taking care of ourselves be the greatest gift we give our children? What does it mean “be in the moment” and how can we “be present” when we’re pulled in so many different directions?

Meet Sheryl Stoller, a mother of three grown children and certified parent coach, who draws from personal and professional experience to guide parents on their family’s unique journey.

She shares her story of reaching a crisis point with her family. She managed to get through by literally taking it one second at a time. That meant recognizing when concerns from the past and fears for the future were slipping in and preventing her from being in this moment.

One technique we discuss in mindfulness, which she describes as watching ourselves, and accepting the up and down waves we all feel in life and parenting, catching ourselves when we get caught up in a wave, and getting back to center.

When we are aware, we can recognize the feelings that are being triggered before we run from them, react in a negative way, or resist all together.

She walks though some mindfulness, breathing, and stress-reduction techniques we can try. When we grow that muscle of mindfulness through practice, we become more self-aware and self-compassionate.

Becoming more self-compassionate helps us not just in our parenting but in all of our relationships, including that with our spouse and extended family. The people around us are only triggering feelings deep within us. Once we acknowledge that, we can choose a different response.

She shares how hard it is to be a parent and that the up and down feelings are natural. We can’t do it all and we shouldn’t be afraid to ask for help, that’s taking care of ourself.

And taking care of ourselves is the absolute greatest gift we can give our children. Then we are tuned into what our children need from us in this moment, which more than anything is feeling safe, accepted, and loved, and we all have the capacity to give that. Thank you for joining us for this wonderful conversation with Sheryl.

If you are interested in exploring these topics more, join us in Sheryl's Awakened Family Virtual Book Club starting in the New Year. See below for how to connect with Sheryl and learn more.

Listen on iTunes

Life Recipe: Practicing MACCA to be in this moment. 

Start with self. We want to get rid of junk in our hearts and heads so we can see what the moment calls for us.

1. Meet ourselves where we are. As is. In this moment. (i.e., I am exhausted, I am sad)
2. Acknowledge Automomy. We have our own needs, different ways of living in this world, I am a separate human beling. See me as I am.
3. Communicate - Talk to ourself kindly.
4. Confidence - Tust in ourself. Express faith that we can get through this.
5. Competence - Believe in the amazing experience of being human and how to get out of negativity.
6. Available - be available to myself. Go take care of yourself. Take myself back to me, back to my essence. I am here for me.

Next, practice it with your children. Once we are in this moment, we can fully be there for our children.

1. Meet them where they are - Be accepting of them and meet them right where they are in this moment.
2. Acknowledge their automony - They are separate, this is their thing. My body may be feeling what they are letting out, but this is them. 
3. Communicate - Communicate energy into their confidence in figuring this out.
4. Confidence - Trust them and believe in their ability to figure it out.
5. Competence - Communicate how competent and capable they are.
6. Available- Be available to them with full presence.

Quotes from Podcast

“We got to a point of crisis and knew that we had to abandon everything we thought to be true and literally take it one second at a time. What is this moment calling for right here and right now. My past didn't matter, my fears over the future. concerns for the past. Just this moment. We managed to get through one second at a time.”

"There is a me behind the me. When I am in this moment, I can notice I am triggered right now."

“To really see clearly, we first have to take care of ourself.”

"The term feeling actually  means sensation. The reactions are the emotions. Emotions are reactive - furious, angry, often a reaction to sadness and hurt. The feelings are underneath. Its a lot easier to be angry then sad."

"We don’t want our children to feel alone with their emotions. When we are present with them, we can be a calming force."

“Taking care of you is the best gift you can give your children”

"Practice the life skills outside of the moments through play and things that they like. When you’re in the moments, you can bridge back to what you talked about.”

Resources discussed

self-compassion.org

dr.shefali.com

Awakened family book club

It's easy to let this season of giving, gratitude and family become one of overwhelm.

One tool to help prevent this overwhelm: pausing first, before reacting. We can use our breath to help us pause.

Taking one moment to pause first, before reacting, helps us disconnect whatever is going on around us with what we feel inside. When we feel good inside, the things going on around us don't have to negatively impact us. We can be a calm, kind presence instead getting caught up in the overwhelm.

Pausing first  helps me not take personally whatever happened, whatever someone did or said. I can't control the way others act. Only myself.

Pausing first helps me realize when I'm lost in my expectations and not really present. 

Pausing first help me recognize when I'm ruminating about the  past instead of in this moment

Pausing first before reacting helps me reconnect with my intention and act with kindness for myself and others.

Pausing helps me remember that I am responsible for the energy I bring to any situation and I don't have to let others negative energy affect me. 

Learning to pause first, react second is a process. We can practice it in all our relationships.

I apply this practice of Pausing to my parenting as much as I can. It takes practice.

It's the really heated moments of overwhelm and frustration that I need to remember pause but sometimes don't. The more I do it, the easier it becomes.

Reaction is the second topic of Dr. Shefali’s Conscious Parenting Challenge. In her book Conscious Parenting, Dr. Shefali says “If you understand that the inappropriate behavior of your child is a call to increased consciousness on your part, you are able to view the opportunities they afford you to grow differently. Instead of reacting to them, you look within yourself and ask why you react. In the asking, you open a space for consciousness to rise.”

My reaction is always up to me - even when we've been mistreated - my reaction is my choice.

When we enter an interaction with kindness and that same kindness is not given back to us, that is when we can sometimes get into a negative state. We did our part, acted kindly, they mistreated us, and we have no choice to be unkind then.

That is where the work begins. We are responsible for our actions, and there is never justification for a negative reaction on our part, even when someone is negative toward us.

I'm feeling helpless and unheard, but it's me who is choosing to feel out of control because of it.

I had an expectation for the evening and someone had another agenda, but it's me who is letting those unmet expectations upset me.

My child misbehaving and I'm raising my voice because I am feeling like I am failing at a parent when really its just my child being his own free spirit and me fearing disapproval from others.

Seeing my reaction as me, and not staying in a negative place of blame and resentment helps us be in control for the next moment, right now. We are not giving contol over to someone else for how we feel now.

Practice the deep pause, deep breath, every time you think of it.

Every time someone does something that you don’t like. Pause.

When we pause, we can become centered again and get back to a place of love and kindness.

It’s a practice of paying attention. It’s a practice of building awareness. 

We are patterned to react the way we usually do. We have to rewire ourselves to act differently.

When we are feeling love and kindness inside, for ourselves, it's easy to extend that to others. It's natural. When we feel negative inside, that's when we extend that out. It's up to us to chose what we give out.

I'm going to try it with my family and with my children and I challenge you too.

Let me know how it goes.

Dr. Shefali, author of The Conscious Parent and the Awakened Family has a 7day conscious Parenting Challenge. Below is my reflection on the first day of her challenge, which is Awareness.

Awareness is the first step toward parenting more consciously.

As I pay attention to my own level of awareness, I can see how easy it is trail into a state of not being 'unaware.' I can also see that I am the only one who can control whether I am aware or not.

Conscious parenting is focused on changing what we can control - only ourselves. It's easy to blame our children, our spouse, the person who cut us off while we are driving. But once we become more aware, we can see how we have control over letting outside things bother us. Awareness is the first step.

"It is only when we turn the spotlight on ourselves that we can shift and once WE shift - as opposed to making our children shift, we keep our hearts open to them and build the foundation of a deep and connected relationship to them."

When I'm in a state of awareness, I'm in this moment. I'm not thinking about how the past event didn't go as planned or creating expectations for a future event, I am here in now, I can really be with my children.

The tough thing as that we all do need to think ahead at times, especially as a parent.

It is possible to prepare for future by doing things we need to do in advance as long as we are in a state of awareness as we are doing these things focusing on one thing at a time. I try to block off my time so that when I'm preparing lunches of the diaper bag, I am doing just that. When I am doing the dishes, I am just doing that.

We can get interrupted by our children when we are doing what needs to be done and that makes it harder to focus on just one thing.

I have found when I have given my children some time when I'm in a state of total awareness and presence with them, then when I need to step away to accomplish other things, they are more likely to play on their own and do their own thing happily.

It's when I given them none of my time, or I gave them time in a completely unengaged way, preoccupied in other thoughts, that it was as if I didn't spend any time with them at all, and things get messy. They are craving my attention and start doing the things they know will get my attention—bothering their siblings, wining and hanging on me, doing destructive things.

Bringing awareness to each moment is definitely a challenge - but I can see how positive it is once I start practicing it. It's easy to stray into thinking about how I want to change a past outcome or worrying about a future one. By practicing awareness, I can catch myself faster when I'm thinking this way and reset. Becoming aware and conscious means letting go of those thoughts that are out of our control so we can be in this moment.

When we are in this moment we can be who we need to be for our children. We can give them the engaged presence and love they need. We can be spontaneously laughing and enjoying and feeling grateful for our time with our children. We miss too much when we're not aware.

"The key to this process is awareness of the present moment. This means that we train ourselves to engage with our children in the here-and-now, fully in the reality of the present, detached from the past and the future." - Shefali Tsbury

How do I become more aware?

One way is to pay attention to how I am communicating - what words, energy, and tone am I using?

1. Pay attention to my words - am I controlling them or connecting? The more I am empathizing with my children and helping them understand how they are feeling though my words, the more positive the outcome is. They shut down if I am just barking at them and being negative in a disconnecting way and its unproductive.
2. Pay attention to my No's and Yes's. Its easier to react in a snap way and say no. Its harder to emphasize with our child and think how they are feeling and respond in kind way. Most of the time we can turn a no into a yes. For example: Can I watch another show? Yes we would love to watch more shows, we could sit and watch them all day, it's better for our bodies and minds to have something else right now. Let's do this puzzle instead.
3. Be aware of Judgmental words. Comparing our children, pushing them to be someone they are not, describing them in a negative way. All of these words hurt them and we don't ever intend to hurt our children but it happens and it hurts them. We may see them using similar words to another child or see how they turn inward and shut down a bit after hearing them. We have to be more aware so we pause before using words that can hurt and choose kind, productive words instead.

Finding a way to JOIN our children before saying no is also an important way to connect to them and create open communication." - Shefali Tsbury

Conscious Parenting is a process. I am practicing and learning everyday. We keep falling and we just have to pick ourselves up and try again.

Dr. Shefali's books are so amazing if you are looking to learn more. Check out her website for more on the challenge and her life-changing work.

In the busyness of our days, we can sometimes feel like life is just happening to us when really we are shaping our own lives by the choices we make everyday. When we focus on awareness, we can consciously create a life that is our own. Then at the end of the day, we feel content because we’ve taken ownership of our choices and feel we did the best we could.

Meet Karli, a mom of two boys, who has found that even though life is busier with children, it’s much more colorful. She is a designer and creator at heart and hasn’t put that aside since having children. She's found a way to still nurture that part of her through her full-time work as a graphic designer and by building her own online shop with her husband where they hand craft, curate, collect and sell goods that have a soul and story.

Her shop is reflective of her life where she consciously chooses everything that fills it. When we bring awareness to the choices—everything from how we spend our money, to how we fill our home and our bodies, to how we create quality time to nurture our most important relationships—we become more purposeful.

Being purposeful means trusting ourself. Coming to the realization that each of us is the perfect mother for our child helps her with that. She knows that her best is to be real, and be her, and not be everything to everyone. It means giving her all to the the things that mean most to her and not comparing her all to anyone else’s.

There is no guidebook to parenting or life, we are all doing the best we can, trying, failing, and trying again and that is enough as long as we are doing what feels right for us. It’s our job to teach our children to grow into their own unique selves, to follow their passions, and the best way we teach that is by living that way ourselves.

We discuss so much:

• how to be thankful for the little things
• focusing on quality of time, not quantity of time with children
• being in the moment
• shaping our perception toward more gratefulness
• The uniqueness of each child at birth and how its our job to respect that without projecting our own passions upon them

You’ll love to hear from this woman with incredible passion toward her family and her business— which is truly an extension of who she is as a person. She inspires all of us to make time for the things that fill us up because doing so makes all the other parts of our life more colorful and meaningful.

Quotes:

“Life isn’t just happening to me. I am shaping my own life.”

“I try to just be aware of what I am feeling, doing, purchasing. So I am filling my home, my life with things that have meaning, consciousness.”

“If you can buy something that positively impacts someone life. You are contributing to a lot of cycles of people trying to do the right thing and promoting things that they love and trying to make a decent living for their families.”

“It fulfills me because I’ve always been a creative designer person. I feel most like me when I am doing this kind of thing.”

“I’m very conscious of the time I spend away from them so I’m very conscious of the time with them and giving them all my attention and its easier to do that because I’m not wishing I am someplace else because I’ve already taken the time to do the things I need to do to be me.”

“It fascinates me to see how much of them is just in them - it’s who they are. We have to recognize that and respect that and really trying to support what they are good at and passionate about, It’s not about me. They are all their own people and just being happy about that. It’s fun.”

“I am the best mom for my children, just as I am. It doesn’t mean I wont mistakes or wish I had done something differently or that its not going to be hard. I bring something special to my children and because I love them with everything that I have.”

“I don’t want them to be afraid to make a mistake. I want them to always feel like they can talk to me and they can make mistakes just as we do. It’s okay. Just own it and learn from it.”

“I try to say thank you for the little things everyday. Thank you for dinner even though it happens everyday. When I look at my spouse in the light of gratitude, it keeps me in a better mindset about our marriage.”

“Parenting makes life more intense and colorful. I want a life that isn’t easier but richer and fuller for me.”

We all have moments in parenting when we aren't our best. Our children are at their worst, melting down, and we've reached our limit too. So through the tone of our tone of our voice, the look on our face, the words we chose, or the way we tune them out—we are not parenting from an intentional, loving place.

It can feel like we don't have control over our own negative reactions, like we have no other choice. Their behavior is triggering anxiety, discomfort, anger and we react in what seems the be most natural way, the only way.

Awareness is the first step toward choosing a different way.

With awareness, we can pause, observe the intense feeling and impulse before acting upon the feeling in a reactive, negative way. However, sometimes we are in a mindless state, on auto-pilot, and not even aware of our own reactions.

When we're not aware, we are just repeating old patterns—maybe rooted from the way we were treated in our own childhood. Our children have a way of triggering the feelings within us that need to grow but they give us a chance to break the old patterns and think new thoughts rooted in love.

"Taking the time to stop, to breath, to locate and feel the emotion and accompanying tension in the body gives us at least a chance to recognize in some way we are under an old spell, and perhaps to wake from it with a more mindful and imaginative response" (Inner Work of Mindful Parenting by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn).

When we are able to catch ourselves in these tough moments and choose a loving response, which is what our child really needs from us in their difficult moment. A healing takes place within us. It doesn't mean we let our children get away with anything, it just means we are there for them in an understanding, loving way, teaching them the skills they need to understand their emotions and and get back to place of love.

When we choose to be kind rather than cruel, we experience kindness ourselves.

We feel internally whatever we give out. When we act cruel, we feel it. When we act kindly, we feel it too and it's the more natural way. It may not feel like it, but it's easier to be kind then cruel.

"In any moment, we can choose to set aside the emotional armor that may have been useful to us in the past and give our children the gift of a more open, compassionate, and understanding present."(Inner Work of Mindful Parenting by Myla and Jon Kabat-Zinn).

Mindfulness is the greatest parenting tool I've found.

We can make better choices, more aligned with our intentions to love our children and be the best parent we can be through mindfulness. When we pause before an automatic reaction can take place, we can choose a kind and loving response. Because its their toughest moments, when they are behaving irrationally and at their worst, they are giving us their greatest call for love.

If we want to teach our children empathy, so they are attuned to the feelings of others, then we have to help them understand their own feelings. Giving them empathy and kindness as they are learning to their own big feelings and emotions helps them learn empathy themselves. If we want to teach them kindness, we have to be loving and kind ourselves.

Children learn the most by what we model. Mindfulness has helped me most in being the person I want my children to learn to be.

So what is mindfulness, how do I practice it, and apply it to my parenting?

Mindfulness is being present, positive, and accepting. 

With mindfulness, we are connecting with ourselves and others and our days are more intentional, purposeful, and meaningful.

• With presence, we are aware of our thoughts and feelings and can choose to be kind, compassionate, and loving, because we aren't thinking about the past or future. We are here now.
• With positivity, we see some goodness in whatever we are experiencing. We can be positive when we let go of the things we can't control like the past, the future, or the way others treat us or behave. We don't take things personally knowing we are only responsibility for ourself and the way we treat others.
• With acceptance, we follow our own heart realizing only we know what is right for us. We don't compare or judge because we know everyone is on their own unique path. We don't judge ourselves as better or worse than any other person or thing. We allow ourselves to be as we are and celebrate our differences that open up new perspectives within us. When we choose ourselves, not the person others want us to be, we can feel joy right now.

Mindfulness is being responsible for our thoughts.

Mindfulness is noticing our thoughts without judgement, being attentive and aware of them. There will always be people, experiences, feelings and emotions distracting us from feeling love. It's a process not an end result. All we can do is notice these thoughts, accept them, and then we have made way for new thoughts that are positive and kind. When we are in a state of observing and noticing, we can see negative feelings as outside of us and we can return back to a place of love and goodness that is within each of us and every other person.

Mindfulness takes practice.

We have to practice mindfulness just as we practice anything else. The more we practice, the better we get and the happier we are. We have to exercise our mindfulness muscle and that's how it gets stronger and eventually becomes habit. Here's how we can practice mindfulness:

• Mindfulness at a set time like when you wake up through stillness, quiet, or meditation. Moments of stillness at the start of the day have lasting effects throughout the day,
• Moment-to-moment mindfulness throughout the day. You can take a moment or a breath at anytime throughout the day and bring attention to the task you are doing.

Tools to practice mindfulness.

• Breath -  Use your breath to ground ourself in our body,  slow down and bring awareness to right now. You can focus on the inward and outward feeling of breath moving through your body and it will calm you and bring you back. Whenever I am feeling overwhelmed, focusing on breath brings me back to a more calm state.
• Labeling - Use your senses to simply observe whatever it is you are experiencing in this moment. Call it out to yourself - I'm hearing birds, I'm seeing cars, I'm feeling something in my leg, I'm hearing wind, I'm seeing leafs, I'm feeling my shirt, I'm hearing a train horn. Allow yourself to just feel whatever it openly without judgement. Do this throughout the day to bring awareness and become present to what you are feeling.
• RAIN -Recognize whatever it is you are feeling or experiencing. Allow and accept the experience to be there without judgement. Investigate the feeling with kindness amd curiosity as an observer of the feeling. Nurture and nourish yourself for whatever you felt. Give yourself kind words and love for the experience. This practice works especially well if you are feeling overwhelmed. It helps you see the experience as outside of you , knowing that you are goodness and this was just something that happened not who you are. More on this at tarabrach.com.
• Movement - Any kind of movement helps your mind get back to a more calm centered space. Walking, exercise, stretching. You can practice Breath, Labeling, or RAIN while you are moving.
• Nature - Getting outside helps you to zoom out and see your experience as rather small in the lens of the larger world around us. You can see how nature just flows and that our life can too if we let it. Look up at the clouds, see the bigness of a tree or the sky, look at an animal or a flower. Everything in nature is perfect and we are too. It's only when we define our experiences as good or bad or less that everything seems out of alignment. As long as we are experiencing and growing and connecting, everything is perfect and how it is meant to be.
• Gratitude - There is always something to be grateful for. Look around you and you will find something. Think about what you have, the people in your life. There is always something we can be grateful for, but we just have to focus on it. Writing down what we are grateful for everyday helps thinking this way become a habit.

Mindfulness is seeing all the areas of our life as part of us and connected

Knowing that when any one area is out of sync, it negatively impacts the other areas. We can't experience one part of our life fully and wholeheartedly if we are disconnected another area, even if they seem disconnected and even if its from something from our past that hasn't yet been resolved.

• Health - The way we move our body and what we put inside affects everything – our mood, emotions, energy, motivation. We have to be mindful about what we and how we are incorporating movement into everyday.
• Relationships - We are here to connect and grow and serve and we do so through our relationships. Our relationships call us into new ways of living and learning and loving.
• Spirituality - There is universal power greater than each of us that we see in nature and it exists in each of us, but we must be open to it.
• Wealth - Our abundance and prosperity can be limitless if we believe in our oneness with it. If we are contributing and serving at our highest level, wealth flows to us and enables us to live with a highest quality of life we desire.
• Work - Our work should be doing what we love, an extension of our self where we serve others. True work is doing what we love so much that it doesn't even feel like work. True work is serving others.
• Parenting - The greatest opportunity for us to grow ourselves into a more loving and mindful state. To live more wholeheartedly as we are in the presence of these little humans who live with so much heart. Showing us how to feel our emotions, be real, let go.

Mindfulness is growing, evolving, and moving forward

Life is not meant to be the same everyday. We are here to experience and grow and that means stepping out of our comfort zone and doing the things that scare us a bit. That is how we grow into the person we are meant to be. We have to have an idea of where we want to go. Mindfulness helps us see that more clearly. It's never fully clear though, that's why we just take small steps. If it's not the right direction, that's okay, we take a different step, until it feels right. We'll feel positive ripples of moving forward and across all the other areas of our life.

Who we are, where we are meant to go, and what we are to do here is inside us. We have to clear our mind so we can make way for the voice within. We'll know it when we here because it will feel like truth and grace. Mindfulness helps us live as we are meant to live - wholeheartedly, with meaning, and with purpose.

“Your beliefs become your thoughts, Your thoughts become your words, Your words become your actions, Your actions become your habits, Your habits become your values, your values become your destiny.”― Mahatma Gandhi

Stepping away from our everyday opens up our minds and hearts and gives us new perspective. We can see our world differently, sometimes with deeper compassion for others and appreciation for what we have. We can do this where we are by taking a mental break or by physically by traveling—to a new country or just a new neighborhood nearby.

Meet Noele Sutherland McLain, a mom of a son who is four, who hasn't just traveled, but lived in all different parts of the world. He son actually holds three passports, one for Scotland where she is from, Belize where they lived for his first four years, and US where they live now.

She discussed differences of raising a child here in the States versus Belize. She talks about how safe it is here and how fortunate we are that if something happens to one of our children, they are in the best care almost immediately whereas in places like Belize it would be a plane ride away to get to a top hospital.

The perspective she's gained from her travels helps her not be the 'helicopter parent' knowing she doesn't need to hover over her child as he grows and experiences life.She realizes it's the mistakes in life that we learn the most from, that is why she feels it's important to let her children fall at times. It's up to us to help them get up and keep tying.

It's easy to feel unsafe with our high-drama and information-overload culture, but it's actually the most peaceful era in human history.

It doesn't mean something can't happen today that would change everything - it could - and she did lose her mother really suddenly. She doesn't dwell in the negative, instead she takes time to cultivate compassion and gratitude in her life everyday.

She really feels that being happy, by cultivating compassion and gratitude in our lives, is the very best thing we can give to our children.

We'll discuss so much:

• Her former life in the music industry babysitting bands
• How practicing yoga for 25 plus years has been her center, keeping her grounded through everything
• What it's like living in a place where the your backyard is the Shed aquarium
• Importance of making time for mental and physical exercise is vital - especially as someone who chose to be a mom later in life

Join as us for this fun and eye-opening discussion as we get to know our EveryDayEveryMom, Noele.

Listen on iTunes

Ingredients:

• 15 minutes a day or more if you can (whenever you can fit it in, even as you are making dinner, driving, commuting)

Method: 

Take some time at any point in your day to think about the things you are grateful for. Thinking this way really does rise above anything that might make you feel you are missing out or don’t get or have. There is always something around you to be grateful for. Many of us have a pretty privileged lucky life. A lot of people have it a lot harder. When you can cultivate feelings of compassion and gratitude, it reduces stress, makes things a lot easier, and makes you a happier person. The most important thing you can do for your child… be a happy parent.

Nobody has it all figured out when it comes to parenting. Too often we put a mask up that everything is rosy when its not what we are really feeling. We all experience the inevitable ups and downs so we do so many of us feel like we can't be truthful about how we are really feeling? 

If we're holding on to negative or fearful feelings, covering them up doesn't make them go away. We have to bring awareness to those feelings to change them and make room for all there is to feel grateful about in our lives.

Meet Kristy DeJesus, mom of five, and primary bread winner in her family. Kristy is honest and open about her amazing path from in debt and facing foreclosure to where she is today as a million-dollar business owner. By feeling grateful and prioritizing self-care, she stays true to herself and feels worthiness amidst the everyday ups and downs of parenting and life we all face.

She didn’t want her children to see two versions of herself, one that was unhappy behind closed doors but had it all figured out and perfect once the door opened. She wanted to be real and truthful. Having friends that she could be honest with helped her realize that being real is way better than perfect.

She shares that “we put up with what we feel we deserve.” If we aren’t living the life we want, we may need to look at what we are telling ourselves through our self-talk. The dream for her life became a reality once she became crystal clear about what she wanted, started taking small steps toward it, and  believing wholeheartedly that she deserved more.

We’ll also discuss:

• Prioritizing exercise and time for visualization, meditation
• Creating strong friendships where you can be your whole self and support one another
• Finding a balance that works for you and making self-care a priority
• Building a million-dollar business
• Seeing ourselves in others - the good and the not so good

She even shares a life recipe about how to be happy right now through gratefulness. Too many of us put our happiness on hold, saying it will happen in the next corridor of our life. But happiness is about seeing the good things right now—not after you lose the weight or have a new job—our life is right now and there is always something to feel happy about.

You’ll love this chat with an amazing woman who inspires and encourages all of us to live more fully, believe we deserve more, and not wait on our happiness.

Quotes from Interview

“If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t be who you were designed to be. You have to put yourself first. We’re all winging it, doing the best we can.”

“The fiber of my being loves my business. When you do what you love than life is more enjoyable.”

“Some of your darkest period of times, later something beautiful and miraculous will come from it. At the time that you are in it, you don’t see it. When you look back, you can see all that you went through lead to something great.”

“I try to lead with love and help people to dream again and think what if.”

“You have to know what you want to do, see it in your mind, it has to be so crystal clear about what you want. What it looks like. How it feels.”

“I want you to see yourself in exactly the place that you want to be. Hold that thought and just feel it for a few minutes. Smile when you think about it. See the work that you need to do to get there, see yourself doing it with joy, That you loved each part of the journey. That you know where the destination is leading you. You need that in order to make it happen.”

“To really transform your life you have to know where you are going and what you want.”

“We also have to acknowledge the areas in our life that aren’t in alignment with our goals and visions.

"I don’t want to be the same person in ten years. I am so much more evolved and comfortable where i am and I want that to continue.”

"If they are unsure if they are worth it, worthy of it. Question it. Why not? It has to start by questioning why I think I don’t deserve it. Some people don’t even acknowledge something is wrong."

Life Recipe: Feeling gratefulness. We are happiest when we are feeling grateful.

Ingredients: 

1. Awareness

Method: 

At any moment we can be in a better place mentally, emotionally just by taking a moment to notice what is going well in our life.

A lot of us put happiness on hold and we think its in the next corridor of our life. And we’re missing our life. We keep waiting for our life.

We just need to feel the moments that happen everyday that are good and I am happy for.

We don’t want to miss it. Its the little moments everyday that are adding up to our life. Being more aware of it and taking it and appreciating it.

"You can never identify a trait in another person that you don't already have within ourself. You see all the things in others that you have within you. It’s because you have those characteristics in your self. Thats why you notice them thats why you are aware of them."

With so much of parenting being unknown and unfamiliar, it can make us worry a lot because we tend to fear things we don’t understand. How do we trust more and worry less?

Meet Shelby Spear, mother of three college-aged children, who shares a unique perspective on parenting now that her children are out of the house. As she looks back, she reflects on how important it is to trust instead of overprotect.

As a self proclaimed ‘worrier’ its easier said than done but its worth the effort at any stage of parenthood to ensure we don’t model a life of worrying, which could set our children back from wholeheartedly living their own lives. They are just with us for a short time teaching us what we need to grow just as we are teaching them. We have to trust them and ourselves to make the most out of our precious fleeting time with them.

In this heartfelt chat, we’ll discuss:

• How children are our greatest teachers opening up things in us we didn’t even know existed
• Value of one-on-one time with our children and no-consequence conversations as they got older
• That our teenagers’ brains are crazy
• Self-discovery and looking at our fears with a sense of reason
• Prioritizing time to communicate with our spouse so we grow together through parenting, not apart

She’ll also share a life recipe for winning the heart battle, and choosing love over fear. Thanks for joining us as we hear Shelby’s motherhood story.

Life Recipe:How to Overcome the Heart Battle: Allowing Love to Conquer Fear

Ingredients:

1. Honesty – Be honest with yourself about your fears in parenting
2. Perspective – Look at your fears through a lens of reason
3. Prayer – Pray for the strength to surrender your fears to God

Method:

Understanding our fears in parenting requires mindful discernment of our emotional state related to certain situations. This self-discovery illuminates our fears and may even bring to attention fears we were unaware of. After our fears are unveiled, we need to gain a healthy perspective about each one and ask ourselves if our concerns are warranted or more of a reflection of our own weaknesses, past experiences, etc. Any fears in the column of overreacting need special attention and healing work. Left unattended, irrational fears can harm our children more than protect them.

If we model fear and over protect, we can inadvertently inhibit our children’s growth, set them up for a life of worry, or create a relationship that is strained from hovering. Love binds, fear separates. For me, prayer continues to be my weapon against this debilitating heart battle. Daily I need to ask God for the strength to surrender not only my fears, but my children into His loving hands. Our children are not ours after all, they are a gift, on loan from a loving God who feels we are worthy of the call of motherhood. At the end of the day, He’s got this…we just need to Trust. Which is easier said than done. But His love for us is incomprehensible in comparison to the love we have for our children. And if we would do ANYTHING to protect our kids, we have to believe He will do the same for us and then some…to infinity.

Quotes from Shelby during podcast

"Some things are not worth worrying about. We have to trust. My children are my greatest teachers"

"They help me be a better person all around and teach me things about life I would have newer noticed."

“We as mothers have to accept as much help as possible and be a community for each other because its always a struggle to balance it all.”

"We come into the marriage with different ideas of what parenting looks like. I was brought up a certain way, he was brought up a certain way and its really about communicating."

"We both feel strongly at the end of the day we need to support one another."

 "If i am modeling worry to them, are they going to be worriers? Those are the questions need to ask."

Life happens and we react. We don’t know how we are going to react. My fears don’t always help. We have to think rationally.

Worrying too much can set them back.I don’t allow them to have experiences that might be good for them because I fear something bad could happen or its not the right things for them

Books we discussed

The 5 Love Languages and 5 Love Languages for Children both by Gary Chapman. We all feel and express love differently. This book is a great tool for learning your husband's love language and how to fill up his love tank.

Yes, you’re teen is crazy! by Michael J. Bradley. A child’s brain is not developed is not fully developed in teen years. Incapable of reason in a lot of cases. I could separate my frustration and see things in their shoes. 

Music by: http://freemusicarchive.org/music/Lee_Rosevere/Love_Wins/"

Daily reflection for conscious living and parenting, mindfulness, and positivity. Interviews with moms who share their stories and life recipes for finding more fulfillment and joy in their day. Community that recognized parenting looks a little different for everyone but we connects us all because we all want to be better for our children. Knowing we give our best to our children by being our best and living a life that is true and meaningful for us.