Back at you with another anthem of self-doubt, really letting that inner critic go to town. There's not a parade in the world I won't rain on if you give me the opportunity! Try me!!!
Another song that felt like it was in development for a ridiculously long time as I pieced it together, added more keys and other things to fill in the soundscape underneath the (rather high) guitar part and make it feel bigger, and tried to get sufficiently good vocal takes. The bridge got almost completely swapped out at some point. It's a long song and I'm allergic to just using the same instrumentation in every verse. The end result is that it took forever to end up with something I was happy with! But I am happy with it! For now!
Oh no
I'm turning from your light again
I'm unworthy in your sight again
I'm closing all the gates
The glow
Is coming from your eyes again
It took me by surprise again
And I just can't relate
It's not like it's something I don't recognize
I think I felt it myself once or twice
I just can't remember when or why
I'm off my own supply
What have I lost
I'm still too young to know the cost
Of all the rivers that I've crossed
Never to go back
Today
Walking down Magnolia Way
Wondering what I should say
And what it is I lack
It's like a lobotomy
Like I lost a crucial part of me
And I just can't remember how it came to pass
Or where I saw it last
Don't tell me I should think like a child
I'm not a child anymore
I got a hundred thousand problems that I didn't have before
And I hate this, seeing you so weightless only makes me feel more leaden
It all drags me down over and over and I keep forgetting
What it's like to be lifted
Am I tapped out
A salted field in endless drought
Where no green thing will ever sprout
To strive upward again
And if you find
Your sparkling iridescent mind
Needs another to reflect in kind
What then?