Welcome to part 3 of the Secrets Men Keep Series! Let's explore today the deeper aspects of the ritual initiation in masculinity and try to better understand the intimate and sexual issues that men face in their romantic relationships.
We all know who the Maidens are. In mythology, the Hero meets the Maidens or the Nymphs after having separated from his mother, learned his father’s skills, gotten direction from the elderly and relying on his male mentor to keep him on his path. The Maidens seduce and tempt the hero and are seduced by him. They represent passion, risk and constant change in a man’s life.
Although the Maidens are only a step in a boy’s journey of maturity, their gifts are essential for his masculine development. He needs female attentions, sexual or otherwise, in order to feel worthy as a male lover. When a young man reaches the realm of the Maidens unprepared, he is deeply unsure of himself. He is desperate for love and attention so he is ready to sacrifice his self-image development to have the Maiden’s attention. At this stage, he believes that having the love of a princess is manhood. He needs to assure himself that he can posses the Maiden, dominate her and be loved by her. If the Hero reaches this realm while still initiated, not having separated psychologically from his mother and not being able to rely on his father’s or other mature men’s teachings and guidance, he will remain stuck there. In mythology, this is represented by the hero’s prolonged sleep in the Maiden’s castle or garden, or in her servitude. He feels lost without her love.