There is so much we do not know about mental illness, including deep depression that results in the inability to even get out of bed, let alone function in daily life. Many more people than we realize struggle every day to do the next thing with their will because of sadness, a lack of joy, and purpose reigning in their hearts. They have tried everything to get better but nothing helps. Add to this equation the spouse who watches her husband slide into a pit of despair with no explanation. Sadly, Christians often identify a lack of faith or discipline as the root problem. Even the patient suffers from shame and guilt when the root cause is actually a physical and chemical disconnect in the body. In this frank conversation, Jenni Holder describes how her faith-filled husband suddenly experienced repeated panic attacks that were the first signs he had a mental illness that could not be healed with more faith. Jenni and her husband have agreed that they need to share their story as they are experiencing it so that others on similar pathways will know they are not alone and there is hope. With her husband’s permission, Jenni takes us into the inner sanctum of their marriage and their ongoing battle to find a steady path for their family.

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