Send JKO a Text Message

Many women in toxic relationships endure a pattern of weaponized silence that harms them. JKO discusses the difference between healthy cooling-off and punitive silence, what it does to your body, soul, and spirit, and five things you can do to get the better of weaponized silence. 

The January 1 episode had a glitch that made many listeners not see it, so am releasing both episodes back-to-back. Please listen to S10E01, A Pinpoint of Light, with this one. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

Cooling-off vs. weaponized silence 

Effects of weaponized silence on your nervous-system effects 

A 3-step self-check you can use to identify weaponized silence 

5 practical responses to keep your life moving when a partner weaponizes silence 

How to handle weaponized silence when co-parenting 

Safety Note: Please use these ideas in a way that feels right and safe for your situation. For personal support, reach out to someone you trust or a local service in your area. 

Picture on cover adapted from Canva. 

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

A New Year reset for women living through hidden abuse or heavy seasons. JKO shares three lessons to carry into 2026. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

A pinpoint of light can make a difference in a tunnel of darkness. 

You don’t need the whole map, just take the first step. 

Your value is real even in chaos. 

It’s okay to have ebbs and flows. 

When you’re overwhelmed, show yourself compassion. 

Safety Note: Please use these ideas in a way that feels right and safe for your situation. For personal support, reach out to someone you trust or a local service in your area. 

Picture on cover generated by Canva AI.

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

In this Christmas Day episode of Messy Can’t Stop Her, JKO explores the meaning of love for women who have loved deeply and paid a personal cost. Drawing from lived experience, science and scripture, this episode unpacks God’s unconditional love, the impact of disappointment on the heart, and how love can be restored.

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode

Christmas as the ultimate declaration of love.

The connection between self-blame, burnout, and difficulty practicing self-love

Reframing love for 2026

A Christmas benediction for women in the trenches

Key scriptures: John 3:16, Romans 5:8, Romans 8:1, 1 John 4:19 

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

Dreaming can feel risky after repeated disappointments. In this episode, JKO explores why women in survival mode struggle with vision, and how faith and a single written goal can help you move forward. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

Why women in the trenches stop dreaming 

The power of writing down your vision when life is unstable 

What faith looks like when certainty is unavailable 

How vision + faith move you forward 

Key Scriptures: Habakkuk 2:2, Proverbs 29:18, Hebrews 11:1, Jeremiah 29:11

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

 Labels shape our identity, especially during vulnerable seasons. In this episode, JKO explores how labels form, why they stick, their psychological and social impact, and how women can refuse the harmful names that life gave them. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

• What labels really are and why they’re powerful
• The psychological process of labels becoming identity
• The social consequences of being labelled
• Biblical insight on naming and identity
• Practical steps to refuse harmful labels

References

Identity-Level Imprints: The Hidden Code Driving Stress, Health, and Transformation

The Danger of a Single Story: unCreating the Life that You do not Want

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

Many women in the trenches live with chronic disrespect starting in childhood, showing up in friendships, and continuing into intimate relationships. Some even experience it from people who they shared their struggles with. Over time, that disrespect slowly reshapes how a woman sees herself.

In this episode, JKO explores how disrespect erodes identity and shares seven steps that can help rebuild self-respect.

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode

What disrespect looks like in everyday relationships.

How long-term disrespect affects identity and self-worth.

Practical ways to rebuild self-respect in hard seasons.

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

Peace can feel impossible when you’re in the middle of life’s challenges. In this episode, we discuss why peace is hard when trauma and stress overwhelm a woman, and the steps that help women in the trenches of life reclaim their peace. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

Why peace feels impossible in long-term stress 

Common thieves of peace 

Steps to reclaim your peace 

Key scriptures: John 14:27, Isaiah 26:3, Philippians 4:7 

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

When you’ve been in the trenches long enough, compromise can start to feel like survival. This episode explores how exhaustion, fear, and not knowing your values lead to quiet compromise and how, step by step, you can realign with who God created you to be.

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode

How self-protection leads to compromise

Being raised to please, perform, or “keep the peace” trains you to ignore your own inner compass.

Signs of compromise

Practical steps to overcome compromise when you can’t leave your situation) 

Key Scriptures: Matthew 5:37 

References

Unveiling Your Core - Values Worksheet

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

 Have you ever felt that twinge of pain on seeing a friend’s Facebook highlight? That is the twinge of comparison and though it shows up sometimes as jealousy or envy, we are talking about that twinge that makes us wonder if you’ve been forgotten. This episode explores how comparison steals our peace and distorts our worth, and reminds us that our worth was written long before the timeline we see online. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

Comparison drains your joy. 

God doesn’t measure your worth by milestones. 

Three spiritual practices to quiet comparison. 

Key Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 10:12, Psalm 139:16 

Songs 

Don Moen - He Knows My Name 

Steve Green - He who began a good work in you - (Philippians 1:6) 

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter

Send JKO a Text Message

 Have you learned to smile through the pain, to “forgive and move on,” to shrink your rage into something polite and acceptable? Repressed and unspoken anger turns inward but when purified by purpose, it can lead to advocacy, creativity, and healing. If you are a woman who knows what it feels like to seeth with that silent but simmering force that shows up in sarcasm, cynicism and irritability, this episode is for you. 

Nuggets of wisdom in this episode 

Anger is a signal and a teacher. 

Anger can become a clarifying and redemptive force instead of a destructive one.

Repressed anger is dangerous to our health. 

Redemptive anger transforms pain into purpose, and converts you into a change agent.

Support the show

If Messy Can’t Stop Her blesses or inspires you, please consider supporting it at supportmessycantstopher.buzzsprout.com. Thank you for being part of this journey.

If you would love to share your story on the #MessyCantStopHer podcast, click here to let me know.

Thank you so much for listening.

Music Credit: https://indiefy.me/wanted-carter