Midlife Repurposed

Welcome to Episode 211 of Midlife Repurposed, where today's format takes a reflective turn. I'm your host, Michelle Rayburn, and in this episode, I'm sharing a heartfelt letter I wrote to myself just before the election, without knowledge of the outcome.

I needed reassurance either way. The letter emphasizes the importance of grounding ourselves in faith, love, and community, no matter the political climate.

Join me as I pour my thoughts onto paper and over the airwaves and explore how we can continue to be a force for kindness and unity in our immediate communities.

Here are three key takeaways:

🔹 Embrace Eternal Focus: It's crucial to anchor ourselves in what remains constant. While leaders and circumstances on earth change, our faith and values are unchanging. Our purpose in this world is far beyond any political outcome.

🔹 Love and Compassion Above All: Politics may divide, but our calling to love and support others knows no boundaries. Kindness, empathy, and humility should guide our interactions, no matter the landscape around us.

🔹 Navigate with Grace and Unity: Real progress is built on bridging differences. Extend a listening ear and an open heart, finding common ground in compassion and mutual respect. Our individual actions have the power to transform our communities positively.

I'd love to hear how you're navigating this season, so feel free to share your thoughts on Substack. Just click through to the post, and you’ll see the comments section at the bottom!

Ever wondered what it's like to embark on a creative journey in midlife while blending writing, faith, and a deep connection with nature? The latest podcast episode with Cheryl Grey Bostrom goes into just that, offering so much inspiration and practical takeaways.

Cheryl really got to the heart of creativity, resilience, and faith in this discussion. She’s an accomplished author who shared her journey of shifting from nonfiction to fiction writing in midlife, exploring the inspirations behind her award-winning novels, such as Sugar Birds, and an inside peek at her writing process.

Have you discovered that midlife isn’t as free of responsibilities as you once anticipated? We get it! We also explored the delicate balance between creativity and responsibilities, urging listeners to embrace midlife as a season brimming with new opportunities and personal growth. Cheryl invites us to reflect on the interplay of productivity and fruitfulness, integrating spiritual insights from nature into creative endeavors.

This episode offers encouragement and wisdom to pursue divinely inspired dreams with perseverance and faith.

Key Takeaways:

* Creative Themes and Settings: Get a sneak peek into Cheryl's upcoming novels set against the stunning backdrops of the San Juan Islands and the Olympic Peninsula. Explore how themes of healing and resilience intertwine with lush natural settings to create a profound tapestry in her storytelling.

* Faith and Creativity: Discover Cheryl's philosophy on time and faith, emphasizing divine timing and the importance of patience. Learn how she integrates her faith into her creative process, crafting stories that emphasize hope and positive outcomes despite life's challenges.

* Midlife Transformation and Inspiration: Let's explore Cheryl's transition to fiction writing in midlife, providing encouragement for listeners exploring new passions. Her personal stories demonstrate the power of perseverance, divine guidance, and believing in one's dreams no matter your age.

* Nature and Spirituality: Connect with the interplay of nature and spirituality that fuels Cheryl's photography and writing. Learn how she uses photo essays to mirror spiritual truths, showcasing the magnificence of God with minimal text.

We invite you to celebrate midlife as a season ripe with opportunity for personal growth and creative exploration. Whether you're an aspiring writer or just curious about finding new paths in midlife, this episode offers rich insights and a sense of community for those who wish to align their passions with their life's purpose.

Links

Cheryl Grey Bostom - Birds in the Hand on Substack

Cheryl’s website

Books

Sugar Birds

Leaning on Air

In the latest episode of "Midlife Repurposed," I had the pleasure of welcoming back Clarissa Moll, whose journey through grief offers incredible insights into resilience and empathy. Clarissa's experience with loss and her dedication to helping others through similar challenges are truly inspiring.

Here are three key takeaways from our enriching conversation:

* Grief as a Journey: Clarissa highlights that grief is not a singular emotion or moment but an ongoing part of life. Rather than viewing it as a problem to solve, embracing it as part of our daily routines and personal growth can lead to profound change. She called it a journey.

* Empathy in Action: Her own story shows how personal experiences of pain can develop deep empathy and compassion. Clarissa discusses how this empathy empowers her to engage with news stories in a way that connects with the humanity behind the headlines.

* Balancing Information Consumption: In navigating midlife challenges, it's essential to recognize personal burdens before overwhelming oneself with global issues. Establishing boundaries around media consumption can reduce stress and enhance our ability to cope with changes.

About Clarissa Moll

Clarissa Moll is an award-winning writer and podcaster who helps bereaved people find flourishing after loss. Clarissa’s writing appears in Christianity Today, The Gospel Coalition, RELEVANT, Modern Loss, Grief Digest and more. She co-hosted Christianity Today’s Surprised by Grief podcast and produces Christianity Today's flagship news podcast, The Bulletin. Clarissa’s debut book, Beyond the Darkness: A Gentle Guide for Living with Grief and Thriving After Loss, was a best-selling new release in 2022. She is the author of the Beyond the Darkness Devotional, Hurt Help Hope: A Real Conversation about Teen Grief and Life after Loss, and Hope Comes to Stay (forthcoming 2025). Clarissa is a remarried widow and lives with her large blended family in the Boston area.

Quotes from Clarissa

Every new beginning comes out of a place of absence, and there is grief attached to that. It requires a reorienting time.

Our woundedness gives us wisdom. . . . You can hold joy and sorrow in the same hand. You can live with both and survive.   

We learn how to take our grief to the grocery store, to the office, to the boardroom, to the kitchen table. We let it be a part of who we are and a part of our journey knowing that it isn't the only thing that defines us.

I am a road-tripper, and there is nothing I like more than an itinerary and a map. And the reality is that grief offers us neither of these. Instead, it invites us to a journey that really goes on to the horizon. And when we take that sort of long-game perspective, we can slow down, order our steps a little bit differently, take 40 days, and meditate on what it means to include grief into your life in a way that is honest and sustainable and allows you to grow. And that's what I hope that readers will come away with as they read this book.

For most of us, we've always thought until we interact with grief that it's an emotion. And emotions are something that we sort of process in our heads. We talk about with our friends. We stuff them down and pretend they don't exist. We're not quite sure how to embody our emotions. But, you know, if grief is a companion, if it's sticking around, if it's not leaving you, you can't stay in your head forever. And it helps to have concrete things that you can do that give you a sense of forward motion. Okay. I am making an effort to engage with this unwanted companion. I'm making an effort to rebuild my life.

Links

Clarissa on Life Repurposed (previous interview)

The Bulletin–Christianity Today Podcast

Beyond the Darkness Devotional – New!

Beyond the Darkness: A Gentle Guide for Living with Grief and Thriving after Loss

Hurt Help Hope: A Real Conversation about Teen Grief and Life after Loss

Substack - Hand in Hand

ClarissaMoll.com

I hope you’ll tune in to our conversation! Clarissa shares so many nuggets of wisdom. And do check out her books. The devotional is a beautiful new resource that has so many practical actions with each day.

This week, Michelle takes listeners on a journey of understanding how focusing on the bigger picture in life offers greater clarity and harmony. Drawing parallels between her graphic design experience and life's complexities, Michelle describes how zeroing in on a single pixel—be it a personal issue or societal challenge—can lead to a distorted view.

Just as a photo is composed of countless pixels that must harmonize to form one beautiful image, our lives are made richer by acknowledging and understanding interconnected issues.

The episode continues from a recent Substack post.

Michelle emphasizes the importance of zooming out to understand how everything from education to health care, politics to faith, interrelate. Her insights underscore that solving societal problems requires a collective approach—not an isolated one. This episode serves as a poignant reminder to focus on collaboration rather than division, even when disagreements arise.

Throughout the episode, Michelle shares thoughtful anecdotes and insights from her personal journey and writing. She highlights the necessity of empathy, humility, and seeing shared humanity as critical to overcoming polarization. By choosing love and understanding over winning arguments or proving others wrong, we can create a world that’s more compassionate and inclusive.

Listeners are encouraged to refocus their perspectives and contribute to a bigger, more beautiful picture by collaborating, learning, and growing through tension and differing viewpoints.

Also mentioned the upcoming launch of Michelle’s new book Whiskers, Wags, and Woofs.

In this insightful episode of Midlife Repurposed, host Michelle Rayburn sits down with Dr. Mikala Albertson, a board-certified family practice doctor and author of "Everything I Wish I Could Tell You About Midlife: A Woman's Guide to Health in the Body You Actually Have." Together, they unpack a wealth of practical health advice tailored for midlife women navigating the complexities of perimenopause and beyond.

Dr. Albertson shares down-to-earth tips for maintaining the health of the body you have, underscoring realistic and sustainable goals over unattainable ideals. The conversation addresses the often-overlooked health effects on intimacy, stressing the importance of open dialogue with your healthcare provider and your partner.

Michelle and Mikala also delve into traditionally taboo topics such as urinary incontinence and the profound impact of perimenopause symptoms on daily life. From the need for individualized healthcare consultations to the benefits of preventive health exams, this episode is a treasure trove of information for enhancing well-being in midlife.

Links:

Book: Everything I Wish I Could Tell You About Midlife: A Woman’s Guide to Health in the Body You Actually Have

Claim your preorder bonuses (through October 8)

Connect with Mikala on Facebook and Instagram

Mikala’s website

Listen to Mikala tell her story on the podcast before (Life Repurposed episode 160)

About Mikala:

Dr. Mikala Albertson is a board-certified family practice doctor, author, and well-being advocate who is passionate about women’s health and healing in the imperfect bodies we actually have. She’s the author the book Ordinary on Purpose and inspires readers every day to stop striving for “perfect” lives or some unattainable cultural ideal of “beauty and wellness” and instead aim for wholehearted living through a gentle, achievable, sustainable approach.

Key Takeaways:

* Realistic Health Goals

Mikala debunks the myth of chasing unrealistic fitness ideals and encourages setting sustainable, grounded health targets that fit your lifestyle.

* Limited Agency

The conversation explores the balance of control we have over our health and acknowledges what we can't change, a crucial mindset for managing stress and anxiety.

* Impact on Intimacy

Health changes can affect intimacy, a topic often neglected by doctors. Albertson discusses how to bring up these sensitive issues during medical appointments and highlights the role of sex therapists.

* Perimenopause Insights

From hot flashes to irregular cycles, this episode covers the A to Z of perimenopause symptoms and effective strategies for managing them.

* Supplements

Learn about the safe and beneficial supplements you should consider, and why caution is necessary with the supplement industry’s less regulated offerings.

Main Ideas:

* Health Awareness

Practical tips for embracing the body you have and why realistic health goals lead to better long-term success and emotional well-being.

* Open Conversations

Encouragement for open discussions about traditionally taboo topics like intimacy, urinary incontinence, and mental health.

* Medical Collaboration

Tips on finding the right healthcare providers and the importance of a collaborative approach to your health.

This content does not replace consulting your doctor for advice. This interview is for discussion purposes and for learning. We are each responsible to evaluate the information and discuss with our doctors.

In this episode, we explore practicing spontaneous hospitality and how it fosters deeper connections and meaningful relationships. Sue Donaldson shares her own enlightening experiences – from inviting a mistaken guest to her home to hosting neighborhood gatherings, and how these acts of openness have enriched her life.

Key Takeaways from This Episode:

* Embrace Spontaneity

Sue’s stories encourage us to say "yes" to unexpected opportunities and turn potential mistakes into beautiful connections.

* Intentional Connections

Learn how Sue’s regular neighborhood coffees and “adopting” a college student create long-lasting relationships and community bonds.

* Practical Hospitality Tips

Michelle and Sue discuss practical tips for inclusive and stress-free hosting that focus on the guests’ comfort rather than the host’s perfection.

* Handling Awkwardness and Contributions

Discover strategies to make your guests feel more at ease, like asking them to bring an item or giving them a manageable role in the gathering.

Sue's enthusiasm is contagious as she recounts hosting college students, adapting to dietary restrictions, and maintaining flexibility to accommodate last-minute guests—sometimes dozens! She emphasizes how small gestures like inviting someone over for a wine night or a simple dinner can lead to profound community outreach and personal growth.

Main Ideas Discussed:

* The distinction between hospitality and entertaining and why the former should always be guest-focused.

* The importance of encouraging guests to contribute to gatherings, making them feel involved and reducing the host’s stress.

* Tips for including and mentoring younger generations through informal gatherings and intentional hospitality.

Throughout the episode, Sue provides actionable advice on preparing for gatherings, building inclusive settings, and even handling introverted children during events. Michelle joins in with her own experiences, making this episode a rich resource for anyone looking to repurpose their midlife with more meaningful hospitality practices.

Get inspired by Sue Donaldson’s dedication to welcoming others into her home and heart—whether it’s through thematic gatherings, neighborhood brunches, or her famed wine nights. Join us as we dive deep into how you can cultivate a welcoming heart and create a ripple effect of kindness and connection in your own community.

Don’t miss Sue’s free resource gift for listeners, which includes a prayer for a hospitable heart, a special recipe, and mentoring worksheets.

Links:

* Sue’s bonus resources just for Midlife Repurposed listeners: recipes, free printables, and worksheets

* How to start a neighborhood coffee resource

* Facebook group: Welcome Heart Welcome Home

* About Sue

This week, we have guest Heather Creekmore on the Midlife Repurposed podcast. Heather is an author, podcaster, and coach who speaks extensively on women's body image and comparison. In this episode, we dive deep into aging gracefully, shifting our focus from physical beauty to inner beauty, and the significance of gratitude in our daily lives.

We explored how to embrace the natural changes that come with aging, from hair color to body shape, and how gratitude can significantly impact our outlook. Should we color our hair or go gray? We pondered that too.

Heather shared invaluable insights on nurturing self-acceptance and offered practical action steps to declutter our wardrobes and minds. Whether dealing with shifting family dynamics, managing forgetfulness, or redefining beauty standards, this episode is packed with wisdom and encouragement for anyone navigating midlife.

We also touched on Heather's latest devotional, which provides spiritual guidance and practical steps for embracing aging. So, grab your favorite cup of coffee and join us in discovering how to age gracefully and gratefully. Plus, you can pick up Heather’s devotional (below) wherever books are sold.

Links Mentioned

Compared to Who podcast with Heather Creekmore

Aging Gratefully 30-day devotional book

Heather’s website

This week on Midlife Repurposed, Michelle shares practical strategies to overcome the inertia that often accompanies midlife. Drawing from her personal experiences and the concept of a growth mindset, Michelle provides a roadmap to help you stay mentally sharp, spiritually grounded, and physically well. Whether you're feeling stuck or simply looking to enrich your journey, this episode is your guide to repurposing this vital season of life.

Key Takeaways:

* Understanding Stagnation: Michelle explains the natural tendency towards routine and how it can lead to stagnation, especially as we accumulate life experiences that shape our preferences and habits.

* Cultivating a Growth Mindset: Discover the powerful concept of a growth mindset, popularized by Dr. Carol Dweck, and learn how embracing continuous learning and adaptability can keep you vibrant and engaged.

* Embracing Change: Michelle emphasizes the importance of stepping out of comfort zones and staying open to new experiences, career paths, technologies, and ways of thinking to avoid stagnation.

* Intergenerational Relationships: Learn the value of connecting with different generations. Michelle shares her own experiences of learning from and teaching both younger and older individuals, highlighting the mutual benefits of such relationships.

* Serving Others: Understand how focusing outwardly through community service and supporting others can keep you engaged with the world around you, fostering personal growth and a continued sense of purpose.

* Repurposing Life: Get inspired to find new purposes and passions later in life. Whether it’s starting a new ministry, pursuing long-neglected hobbies, or simply being a mentor, Michelle offers practical suggestions to keep your life dynamic and meaningful.

* Physical and Mental Activity: Explore the importance of staying physically and mentally active. Michelle shares tips on how to keep your body strong and your mind sharp through various exercises and engaging activities.

* Spiritual Growth: Emphasizing the need for continual spiritual development, Michelle discusses how seeking God’s wisdom and remaining rooted in faith can provide a sturdy foundation for lifelong growth.

Whether you’re in the midst of midlife transitions or just looking for inspiration, this episode provides practical strategies to avoid stagnation and repurpose your life with renewed vigor and purpose.

On this Midlife Repurposed podcast episode, Michelle Rayburn joins guest Linda Hanstra as they discuss finding joy and purpose in midlife transitions. Linda shares her story of discovering hope and renewal in unexpected places, providing practical tips and insights along the way.

Michelle and Linda talk about:

* Linda’s journey from blogging about her daughter’s health challenges to connecting with a new blog audience of empty nesters.

* The power of community and how sharing personal stories can inspire and connect others.

* Embracing faith and finding joy even in the face of difficult life transitions.

* The concept of a "mighty nest" and how to transition from an empty nest into a fulfilling phase of life.

* The unexpected blessings and moments of joy experienced in the midst of trials and struggles.

* Overcoming imposter syndrome and finding authenticity in writing and personal growth.

* Encouragement for those navigating midlife transitions, finding joy, and embracing the ride.

Connect with Linda Hanstra:

* Check out Linda’s uplifting content in her Substack newsletter: Empty Nest Joyride.

* Explore more about Linda’s journey and connect with her at LindaHanstra.com.

* Get Linda’s free resources.

* More about Linda's published books, including her Lenten devotional.

* Check out This Reimagined Empty Nest, where Linda shares her story in one of the chapters.

In midlife, newfound confidence often leads to more freely expressing opinions, but balancing that confidence with empathy in communication is crucial. Overly blunt communication can come off as abrasive, potentially damaging relationships. While speaking honestly and directly can be refreshing and effective, particularly in business or building trust in relationships, it can also risk misunderstanding and hurt feelings if not handled carefully.

The key to maintaining this balance lies in empathy. It’s important to consider how your words might be perceived by others, asking yourself if your delivery is both honest and kind. Practicing empathy helps you understand others' perspectives, ensuring that your confidence doesn’t hurt others. When confidence becomes abrasiveness, it can shut down communication, erode trust, and create a toxic environment.

An increase in confidence may also lead to dismissing others' opinions, which can create a feeling of superiority. This dismissive attitude can damage relationships, as others may feel belittled and stop sharing their thoughts. This can be especially prevalent in political discussions or social media posts where blunt labels or phrases like "Obviously" or "Only weak-minded people would think..." can alienate others.

To avoid these pitfalls, it’s important to approach communication with humility. Even when you strongly believe in your perspective, it’s vital to remain open to others' viewpoints. Listening actively and respecting differing opinions strengthens relationships and fosters growth. True confidence isn’t about always being right—it’s about respecting others’ opinions and creating an environment where dialogue and mutual respect thrive.

Five strategies for balancing confidence with compassion include:

* Pause Before Speaking: Take a moment to consider the impact of your words. This can help you find the right balance between honesty and tact.

* Choose Your Words Carefully: Small changes in phrasing can make a big difference. For instance, replacing "You're wrong" with "I see it differently" softens the message without diluting it.

* Be Mindful of Your Tone: Tone can convey as much meaning as words. A calm and respectful tone, especially in sensitive situations, can prevent misunderstandings.

* Practice Active Listening: Focus on the other person's perspective, acknowledging their input. This fosters understanding and helps you respond more effectively.

* Apologize When Necessary: If your words unintentionally hurt someone, a sincere apology can repair the damage and show that you care about their feelings.

Ultimately, the goal is to build a culture of respect. Confidence should be tempered with kindness and consideration, creating communication that uplifts and empowers rather than tears down. In a world that often values bluntness, choosing to balance confidence with compassion strengthens personal growth and relationships, and creates a more supportive environment.

Paid subscribers to Midlife Repurposed will receive additional reflection questions when the episode airs.