Minor Medicine

Jesse’s back for more, is it a health podcast or another joke about Isis—no, not the Bob Dylan song. He would also like to say, “peace on earth and goodwill to men,” but that’s Christmas so he was about 8 days late—we forgive you Jesse! January starts a new year, and official circumcision day, if you were wondering about whose mouth touched Jesus’ foreskin, don’t! If the Jews did it, it was probably wellness anyway. And since thoughts of wellness are everywhere on this month of new beginnings and gym membership discounts we look to the Romans, ye architects of modern civil society and the patron saints of record keeping to mark the occasion. As their god of doors and namesake of January would say, look to the past to see how you can improve your future, or something like that. In keeping with the theme of hindsight, or hang-over, being 20/20, remember, if it was really that bad for you would mankind have kept doing it for a Millenia? As your wellness friends, we’re not here to justify poor decision making, but we are here to remind you: everything in moderation, even religious devotion. This is per the Romans who were sticklers for rules and ceremony when it came to worship, lest anyone get too swept up in religious fervor. There’s a lot to learn from the Romans here, the civilization who both gave us our calendar, but only after a thousand years of tweaking because they couldn’t ever get it right, and the January 1 new year, changed to that day in 153 BC when a rebellion in what’s now Spain necessitated the government be in session two months early. Lesson one, change happens over time and incrementally and two, change sometimes happens quickly, but that’s usually because of a crisis. Here at Minor Medicine we say: change shouldn’t be hard, change should feel good! Happy 2025!

We take a closer look at Luigi's manifesto, which is actually a very zeitgeist-worthy lens on American political alignment circa now. Also: jokes about Super Mario Brothers, ISIS, Bob Dylan, Greek god fandom, and the rise of Dark Wellness.

This is the correct audio for our raucous and breathy Election Night episode. We break down the rise and fall of the First Wellness President that never was, and why Dems have no idea what went wrong. Also: what Trump voters really want; why being mad online is dark wellness; and why every election is ultimately a single issue election (wellness).

Writer and ex-pro athlete Zito Madu stops by to share his unified theory of sports humanism talk about exercise. Topics covered include: the relationship between pleasure and health; working out as false consciousness; the vast and untapped health benefits of playing a sport; and why Randy Moss was always a cornerback at heart. Plus 20 minutes of vintage NBA content!

We’re joined by journalist Chris Gayomali, the former GQ editor whose newsletter HEAVIES just might save wellness from itself.

We touched on a great range of active topics, including performance-enhancing weight loss, Peter Thiel’s Canceled Olympics, LeBron’s untapped longevity cred, Allen Iverson’s psycho-cybernetic visualization, bespoke skin contact Gatorade, and spontaneous Steve Nash impersonations.

Plus: creativity for creative’s sake; the importance of subcultural production; and how to get the best deal on the Adderall you can’t find.

How to Lose 10 Pounds in a Month (Or: I Have a Fight Coming Up) - HEAVIES

What Tony Wang Learned from His Ozempic Experiment - HEAVIES

Understanding Allen Iverson on Allen Iverson's Terms - TrueHoop / ESPN

Bryan Johnson Don’t Die Summit recap - SF Standard

Is exercise the most important medical intervention? - Plain English

Maids and exercise study with misleading title - Psychological Science

Andy Reid’s enigmatic LA origin story - Philadelphia Inquirer

Adam Sandler x Kelce Brothers interview - New Heights

The end of Brat summer has us party crashing the gates of the wellness industrial complex