Mission Imperfect: navigating life with coaches Kirsty and Kathryn

What if acceptance is not a sign of weakness or powerlessness, but is what allows you to tap into your strength and power to find positive ways of moving forward?

We contemplate the possibility that resisting what you don’t want actually keeps you stuck in it, while acceptance allows you to process events and emotions; find ways of changing what can be changed, and make choices about what can’t be changed.

The good news is that acceptance doesn’t exclude the option of throwing a massive strop: just don’t get stuck in it!

Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

What helps you to stop resisting the reality of a difficult situation or feeling?

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball

Many of us struggle with decision-making and place a lot of pressure on ourselves to make the ‘right’ one.

This week we discuss thinking traps around decisions and making choices, including that there isn’t really any such thing as a right decision!

 Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode: 

‘Can you identify one (or more!) of the 6 thinking traps playing out for you?’

Resources:

Kathryn’s blogs on decision-making 

https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/why-are-some-decisions-so-hard-to-make

and

https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/plugging-the-unknowns

Find us here:

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com     

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

And on social media here:

Kathryn on LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball  

Kirsty on Instagram - www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

A trip to the introvert end of the introvert-extrovert spectrum, which turns out to be a lot less anti-social than you might expect, and not all the “loners” are serial killers!

Needing quiet time to recharge your energy, and space to think before you speak, can lead to introverts feeling drained and “othered” by a society geared towards extroversion - we discuss how understanding introversion and where you are on the scale can benefit you.

If you instinctively warm to the word “depeopling”, this one’s definitely for you!

Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

Regardless of how much you enjoy it, does socialising drain you or energise you? If it drains you, how do you cope with that? If it energises you, how do you cope with time alone?

Resources:

The book referenced in this episode is Susan Cain’s “Quiet: The Power Of Introverts In A World That Can’t Stop Talking.”

Susan Cain’s introversion quiz: https://susancain.net/quiet-quiz/

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball

Experiencing some doubt is normal, but what about self-doubt? What about when it becomes obstructive? This is our focus in today’s episode – how we can get stuck in a cycle of self-doubt and how to get out of it!  Fortunately we can still have healthy questioning and become more self-assured.

 Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode: 

‘Do you recognise thoughts with a negative slant about yourself cropping up – e.g. ‘ I can’t…’ or ‘I’m not…’ or ‘I don’t…’? instead of ‘I can, I am, I do’?’

Resources:

Kathryn’s blogs on self-doubt, including the ‘self-doubt cycle’: 

https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/break-the-self-doubt-cycle

and

https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/from-self-doubt-to-self-assured

Find us here:

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

And on social media here:

Kathryn on LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball  

Kirsty on Instagram - www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

In a nutshell, our self-talk matters. In this week’s episode we are talking about what we are saying to ourselves about ourselves and how we can make this kinder. 

 Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode: 

‘What word or phrase are you going to look out for in your self-talk going forward, and how will you respond to it?’

Resources:

Kirsty’s kinder self-talk exercise https://www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk/resources

Find us here:

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

And on social media here:

Kathryn on LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball  

Kirsty on Instagram - www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

Thomas Edison helps us shed some light on the problem of the usual “boom” reaction to perceived failure, and the difference between being a failure and failing at something.

We consider how our feelings about “failure” can be changed by the word “yet”; understanding what we truly want, and acceptance of the impermanence of both failure and success.

Kathryn tells us how “failure” later resulted in marriage, and Kirsty shares how she’s made peace with “failing” at marriage. Which is all decidedly unbiscuity – sorry!

Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

Can you think of a positive outcome from what was originally a “failure”?

Resources:

Elizabeth Day’s podcast “How to Fail”

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball

We explore how our comfort zones gradually become less comfortable, leaving us with the choice of familiar discomfort or unknown discomfort…and the longer term possibility of a bigger and better comfort zone.

We offer 4 tips to help you take that first step out of your comfort zone: focus on what you want; commit to one small action; journaling, and…coaching. Well, we would say that, wouldn’t we - but it really helps!

Key takeaways: don’t get an earful of sand; eat more biscuits, and be nice to frogs.

Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

What might make you want to leave your comfort zone?

Resources:

https://www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk/post/your-comfort-zone-is-not-necessarily-comfortable

https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/are-you-staying-on-discomfort-island

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball

It’s probably no surprise we are talking about new year resolutions for this episode, our first of 2025! 

We discuss our aversion to SMART goals, and some general pitfalls of new year resolutions… and yet we both concede that we are in favour of direction, purpose and thinking about how we want to be and feel. So we’ve decided to talk about resolutions (at any time) the Kirsty and Kathryn way! 

We also discover that Kathryn can’t say ‘2025’ which could be problematic for the next 364 days, and Kirsty ties us in knots with a double negative brain teaser and coins the term ‘mental biscuit’.

 Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode: 

‘How do you want to be feeling at the end of 2025?’

Resources:

The 4 questions to journal on about what you want to do differently:

What happens if I do do this?

What happens if I don’t do this?

What doesn’t happen if I do this?

What doesn’t happen if I don’t do this?

Kathryn’s blog on the anti-resolutions perspective: https://www.kbmindfulcoaching.com/post/the-anti-new-year-resolutions-perspective

Kirsty’s blog on goals: https://www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk/post/we-all-have-goals-even-if-we-ve-chosen-not-to

Find us here:

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com                                        Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk                       

And on social media here:

Kathryn on LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball  

Kirsty on Instagram - www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

Something a little different for Christmas Day and the lead-in to the new year: inspired by the 12 days of Christmas, we have a series of coaching questions for you, (very) loosely connected to the days of the song.

Don’t worry: there’s no singing from us…relief all around!

Today’s (last!) question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

‘Which of the suggestions for the 12 days of Christmas do you definitely want (or don’t want) to do?’

Here's a copy of the 12 days of Christmas 'worksheet' with all the questions we ask during the episode:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1hHc0ARIINsnK4idTHRZl8mNNT7TRq50P/view?usp=sharing

Original link:https://drive.google.com/file/d/1WgMhARI0ojz4jKQm89DKC8rLLnxJRKy6/view?usp=sharing

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk                      

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Kirsty on Instagram - www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

Kathryn on LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball  

The paradox of selflessness…we tie ourselves in knots considering how you’re supposed to give of yourself if you’re not supposed to have a self; ponder the middle ground between selfless and selfish (self-full??); discuss whether the practice of preventative mental and emotional self-care is really fully ingrained in society, and agree that giving of ourselves doesn’t mean sacrificing ourselves.

We also use the word frippery, which should happen more often, and reference being burnt at the stake, which shouldn’t.

Today’s question for you to mull over and which we also answer in the episode:

Consider an area in your life where you’re feeling drained and resentful (or in danger of being so) by what you’re giving: what are you telling yourself about why you have to keep doing it, and how true is it?

Resources:

https://www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk/post/the-selfless-paradox

Find us here:

Kirsty: www.coachingbykirsty.co.uk

Kathryn: www.kbmindfulcoaching.com

And on social media here:

Instagram https://www.instagram.com/coachingbykirsty/

LinkedIn www.linkedin.com/in/kathryneball