Hola Funky Media listeners, Essex here, live from the Costa del Sol, with this week's shenanigans. Well, it seems as of Monday this week, we are welcoming the British and Japanese tourists, back to our shores. To be honest, I'm not sure I've ever seen that many Japanese visitors here but the lack of Brits have been noticed. Not that the parking situation has improved much, but it will be nice to see families and children enjoying their summer holidays, Boris willing, once again, I can't believe Boris still has is on the amber list and Israel is on the green list. Please don't get me wrong I am definitely not anti-Israel but I'm not so sure it's the safest place to travel to at the moment. Here in the Costa del Sol, we are all enjoying life and according to one of our broadcasters, RTVE, there is no longer any autonomous community here at a level of the extreme risk of contagion. So, what's your problem, Boris? People have done what you wanted for the last 18 months, reduce the curve to next to nothing and now you need to give people what you promise them...... FREEDOM! We're just getting on with things here on the coast. Last week I met up with a group of friends for lunch, there was 10 of us, it was a wonderful day. After all, we've pretty much all been vaccinated. Some of us have had both shots, some others, one shot so far but with dates for their second and it was fabulous. We're all respecting the masks situation but only when walking in public spaces. All this BS about having to wear them on the beach and swimming is just that....... BS. We have live entertainment, and the vino is flowing once again. The only thing the police seems to be concentrating on is the new speed laws, which are seeming a little crazy and crime, which is just the way it should be. Yes, life as we know it, Jim, with a few tweaks has returned to some kind of normal here, which is great. The sun is shining, and it's roasting. People are enjoying themselves on the beach, restaurants and other tourist locations. I'm thinking it's about time they resurrected Moses to plead with Boris, "Let my people go". Gibraltar and Portugal's borders are open for business and so it should be here in Spain. I think the Spanish have dealt with the situation really well but now it's time to exercise, a bit of common sense and let people decide if they are willing to take the risk. The vaccination process is chugging away quite rapidly here and I don't know of anyone now who hasn't received at least one of their jabs. Most of us are now headed towards our second inoculation if we haven't already received it and we are enjoying life once again. You can't keep people locked up forever. We've done our time.

Okay, prepare for a soapbox moment now because I have a few rants and I need to clear my chest this week. Did any of you watch the Eurovision Song Contest this last weekend? What a joke it is !! I must admit, I gave it a swerve. I was too busy out enjoying myself but I did catch some highlights on the news. I gotta say, what a load of old tosh as per usual, I noticed it's still a very political competition. What I can't understand is why Britain would still want to participate. Before the singing, even starts, you know Greece is going to award its points to Cyprus and Cyprus to Greece. What is the point? Actually, there wasn't, not 1 point at all. I think it's time to knock this stupidity on the head. Nil point? was our song really that bad, ? or do we maybe think Brexit played some part in it this year? Total waste of time, along with the BBC who hosted it.

On the subject to the BBC, they are taking a lot of backlashes this week and quite rightly so. The British Bullying Corporation is now being sued left right and centre, even more reason to defund them. Let them become a subscription service and see how many people actually sign up for that service. I'm betting not too many. Netflix is now way more popular than the BBC. Even Prince William came out slamming them this week for duping his poor mother into that terrible interview. Maybe, if she hadn't been lied to and coerced, she may never have done that and would possibly still be alive today. Michael Jackson's estate is suing them. In my opinion, they are the left-leaning WOKE brigade, who are committed to bullying people into paying a TV licence for programmes that only follow their own agenda and now they're picking on comedians and comedy programmes from the 70s that they're finding offensive. Political correctness and cancel culture gone mad again! Programmes that we all enjoyed like Fawlty Towers and anything like that doesn't fit with their box-ticking WOKE agenda. They're also double standards going on, it seems, Gary Lineker for example, paid an insane amount of money to present an hour and a half show once a week and is advertising Walkers Crisps, while Nick Knowles gets fired from his show for promoting Shreddies. Double standards in practice, here methinks

I tell you, I'm on a roll this week. Would someone please shut the artist once known as Prince up, he is becoming more irritating as the week's go on. For someone who left the UK for privacy and moved to the tabloid capital of the world and is now invading his own privacy spouting crap about saving the planet. Whilst jetting off on private jets around the bloody world and pontificating to us about carbon footprints. This guy is driving me nuts. The entitled Prince of Wokeness, the "ginger whinger" and his missus, the Duchess of Doom, Me Me Me, are doing their level best to trash our royal family. In the words of Catherine Tate "What a liberty" You don't throw your family under the bus for fame and fortune it´s offensive. I'm no big monarchist, but even I'm fed up with it. The Queen can't really strip them of their titles, because that would cause her a dilemma and make Megan the manipulator, Princess Henry of Wales, which I'm sure she would love. Better to be a Princess than a Duchess hey? She separated him from his friends and family, ghosted her own kith and kin. No wonder the manchild needs therapy. I used to really like that old fun-loving Harry, the cheeky chappy who made a smile but for people who wanted privacy, why are we hearing from them on a daily basis? and now he's attacking the Constitution of the United States. Something else he knows absolutely nothing about. His popularity in the UK is at an all-time low and now, even the Americans are feeling irritated by him. I can't help wondering how long before they have another tea party in Boston Harbour with Prince Harry. He really needs to read up on what happened in 1773. Just a short history lesson. The Boston Tea Party was the precursor to the American Revolution, in which 342 chests of tea, belonging to the British East India Company were thrown into Boston Harbour. Watch out, Harry, you could be next. Let's face it, he's never been the brightest button on the blazer, leaving Eton with two A levels, a ´B´ in Art and a ´D´ in Geography. So exactly what qualifications, does he have to advise people about mental health when he's so messed up himself. For God's sake, Harry, give us all a break and go practice some of that privacy you so badly wanted with Meghan the Duchess of Classlessness and leave us all alone. Thank God we've got the Cambridge´s waiting in the wings.

Now, tirade over, a tradesman was left mortified this week after carrying out work, only to find out he was the wrong house. Yep. He began digging up a garden at an address that he had been given to carry out work and then when his boss arrived they discovered there were two number 37´s on the same street. How can that happen? He received a text from his boss saying he was running late, so to crack on and he would catch up with him. So he decided to get a head start on the day and dug up the border and all the paving slabs in the back garden. His boss arrived once the preparation work had been done only for the pair to realise there was bizarrely two number 37´s, just a few houses apart and it dawned on the worker that they torn up a complete strangers garden by mistake. Can you imagine coming home to tradesmen tearing up your garden? Oh my God. He shared this hilarious video, well of course he did, who doesn't share anything on social media these days? saying, "What a way to start the day huh? showing the number 37 sign outside the house that he´d been working on, saying, "I've just gone to a complete strangers house, opened up their shed, pulled out their pavers and waited for the boss after digging up their immaculate lawn, just to find out it's the wrong house". Since being posted the videos have racked up more than 1 million views, but you'll be pleased to know the mistake has been rectified but how strange to have two houses with the same number on the same street. However, it was reported in the papers, so it must be true...... Right?

Well, Mis Amigos, I figure that's enough ranting and raving for this week. I'm off to enjoy some sun, sand and sangria. Make sure you put plenty of sunscreen on or is it still raining there? I'll build a sandcastle for you with the bucket when the wine´s run out. Until we speak next week. Have a good one. Stay safe and as always, from me, Michelle, Hasta Luego from the Costa del Sol.

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