Momming While Feminist

For our last episode of the season, we talk to Gabby Hewitt, mom of two and a former history and government teacher, about how to talk to (young) kids about the elections. She shares what she’s learned about focusing on values over political identity and helping children question the tendency to put everything into neat categories (aka schema theory). When we develop critical thinking skills, we learn there are not just two sides in history and politics: there are many, many sides.

Feminist CrushesThe movie Cuties and the quote by the writer and director, Maimouna Doucoure: “This film is my own story. All my life, I have juggled two cultures: Senegalese and French. As a result, people often ask me about the oppression of women in more traditional societies. And I always ask: But isn't the objectification of women's bodies in Western Europe and the United States another kind of oppression? When girls feel so judged at such a young age, how much freedom will they ever truly have in life?” I just think it is a really important film for feminist moms to watch. Read this https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/cuties-director-maimouna-doucoure-why-i-made-the-film/2020/09/15/7e0ee406-f78b-11ea-a275-1a2c2d36e1f1_story.html (Article about Cuties by Maimona Doucoure))

https://www.clevelandbrowns.com/team/coaches-roster/callie-brownson (Callie Brownson), a coach for the Cleveland Browns; https://www.washingtonfootball.com/team/coaches-roster/jennifer-king (Jennifer King), a coach for the Washington Football Team, and https://www.nfl.com/videos/nfl-official-sarah-thomas-reflects-on-being-first-woman-to-officiate-play-396004 (Sarah Thomas), NFL official. They made https://www.washingtonfootball.com/news/washington-football-daily-9-29-jennifer-king-callie-brownson-and-sarah-thomas-ma (history) on September 29th at the NFL game between the Cleveland Browns and the Washington Football Team because it was the first time there were women coaches on both sidelines and a woman officiating a football game all at the same time.

The women of the http://drchibornfree.com/paat_fellowship_2020/ (Parent Advocacy Action Team) (#PAATdown202) in Washington DC who are raising awareness around the need to include families of children with disabilities in decisions around school reopening and distance learning. Check out and help support them by signing their petition https://www.change.org/p/dc-mayor-muriel-bowser-demand-more-parent-engagement-in-the-reopening-of-dc-schools-now-62daa8d8-6032-497a-bbcd-8322ce610e47?cs_tk=AjiKtAAiL2OWF3eGe18AAXicyyvNyQEABF8BvOWZIx9luJA7_VQWBtZ_c4U%3Dandutm_campaign=b65dd09b9f5946a78c64ec5ae5435c29andutm_content=initial_v0_1_1andutm_medium=emailandutm_source=petition_signer_receiptandutm_term=cs (here).

Resources:Scene On Radio podcast http://www.sceneonradio.org/tag/season-4/ (Season 4: The Land that Never Was): “What will it take to make the United States a more fully-functioning democracy, and how can we, as citizens, bring about that change?”

https://www.instagram.com/glennondoyle/?hl=en (Glennon Doyle Melton)

https://www.npr.org/2020/08/04/898574852/its-more-than-racism-isabel-wilkerson-explains-america-s-caste-system (Caste) by Isabel Wilkerson

https://www.parentingispolitical.org/ (Parenting is Political Podcast)

Mentions:https://www.edelements.com/ (Education Elements)

https://www.etsu.edu/teaching/resources/more_resources/schema.php (Schema Theory)

About Gabby HewittGabby Hewitt is a mom of two boys (ages 5 and 3) and an Associate Partner at Education Elements, a national consulting firm. She leads work with small and large school districts across the country to impact student success, create more equitable student experiences, and build responsive organizations. She is also a content creator and certified facilitator for The NEW School Rules and The NEW Team Habits, a framework and step-by-step guide to build and implement more responsive teams and districts. Gabby has been a classroom teacher,

How can we turn our anxiety about the upcoming election into productive action? In this episode we talk to Francoise Stovall about what it would mean to have a true democracy and why there are reasons to be hopeful. She offers ways for busy moms to help invite more people into the process and inspires us to take action beyond voting.

Feminist CrushesAs people suggest that Supreme Court nominee, Amy Coney Barrett, is a feminist, this quote from Bell Hooks’ book, Feminism is for Everybody: “Lifestyle feminism ushered in the notion that there could be as many versions of feminism as there were women. Suddenly the politics was being slowly removed from feminism. And the assumption prevailed that no matter what a woman’s politics, be she conservative or liberal, she too could fit feminism into her existing lifestyle. Obviously this way of thinking has made feminism more acceptable because its underlying assumption is that women can be feminists without fundamentally challenging and changing themselves or the culture.”

https://rep.club/collections/books/products/transcendent-kingdom (Transcendent Kingdom by Yaa Gyasi)

https://thejunecup.com/collections/frontpage/products/the-june-cup-regular?gclid=CjwKCAjw8MD7BRArEiwAGZsrBWfqxRh7PNsZoTVfow3lxSw9h3pwjH7fh61N6TeKO749XPsbL4YSLBoCltcQAvD_BwE (June Menstrual Cup)

Mentions:https://votolatino.org/ (Voto Latino)

https://www.indiebound.org/book/9781580050753 (Cunt) by Inga Muscio

https://swingleft.org/ (Swing Left)

https://indivisible.org/ (Indivisible)

https://front.moveon.org/ (Move On)

https://colorofchange.org/ (Color of Change)

https://www.citizen.org/ (Public Citizen)

https://www.commoncause.org/ (Common Cause)

https://workingfamilies.org/ (Working Families Party)

https://iowansfordcstatehood.com/ (Iowans for DC Statehood)

https://rep.club/products/hood-feminism?_pos=1and_sid=ef5072fc4and_ss=r (Hood Feminism) by MIkki Kendall

About Francoise StovallFrancoise has dedicated her career to working for inclusive and accountable democracy, both at home and around the world. As Digital Director at Voto Latino, she oversees web and SMS strategies, and manages digital projects designed to increase participation and civic engagement in Latinx communities and hold power accountable. Before joining Voto Latino, Francoise worked as the Digital Director of the organization, Every Voice, to reform money in politics, and at the National Democratic Institute to encourage civic groups around the world to use digital tools and tactics to strengthen democracy in their communities. Francoise began her career as a campaign field organizer, working on campaigns in Iowa, Pennsylvania, and Florida. She is a graduate of The George Washington University.

In this episode we explore the tendency to think about gender as being two distinct, binary categories: boy and girl, man and woman. We talk about how parents and society impose this binary understanding of gender on our children and how we can do it differently. We’re joined by our special guest Neela Ghoshal, who shares her stories and experiences as a queer feminist mother of two young children and as a researcher and advocate on human rights violations affecting LGBTQ people in the Americas, Africa, the Middle East and Asia with Human Rights Watch.

Note: Neela has lived much of her adult life in Kenya and talks about the cultural space in Kenya for discussing gender fluidity. Since much of our audience is in the United States, we wanted to acknowledge that there is a colonial legacy behind these gender norms in Kenya, in which European colonizers imposed laws to reinforce and uphold the gender binary. Neela discusses this colonial legacy more in depth in her chapter in the book, https://demeterpress.org/books/feminist-parenting-perspectives-from-africa-and-beyond/ (Feminist Parenting: Perspectives from Africa and Beyond), published by Demeter Press.

Feminist Crush:

Khara Jabola-Carolus and Hawai’i’s https://humanservices.hawaii.gov/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/4.13.20-Final-Cover-D2-Feminist-Economic-Recovery-D1.pdf (feminist economic recovery plan for COVID-19). Read about it https://www.yesmagazine.org/economy/2020/07/15/hawaii-covid-recovery/ (here).

https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2020/9/15/21437805/whistleblower-hysterectomies-nurse-irwin-ice (Dawn Wooten), nurse and whistleblower who alerted the public to the alarming rate of hysterectomies being performed on immigrants at an ICE detention center in Georgia.

All the women who support their colleagues to make whatever choice is right for them

Resources:

https://bookshop.org/books/they-call-me-mix-me-llaman-maestre/9780692148839 (They Call Me Mix / Me Llaman Maestre) by https://bookshop.org/contributors/lourdes-rivas (Lourdes Rivas) (Author) https://bookshop.org/contributors/breena-nunez (Breena Nunez) (Illustrator)

https://jesslove.format.com/julian-is-a-mermaid (Julian is a Mermaid), by Jessica Love

About Neela:

Neela Ghoshal is a queer feminist mother, human rights researcher, and advocate for racial, economic and gender justice. In her work at Human Rights Watch, she conducts research and advocacy on human rights violations affecting LGBTQ people in the Americas, Africa, the Middle East and Asia. Neela defies many binaries, struggling with and simultaneously embracing being neither/nor, both/and: she is pansexual (neither gay nor straight), biracial (South Asian and white), bicontinental (rooted in the US and Kenya), agnostic (as the child of secular parents of Hindu and Christian heritage), and the mother of multiricial, third culture children. She spent 40 years considering herself firmly female and uses female pronouns, but is no longer convinced she knows what that means. Neela is a recent transplant to Washington DC. She also recently had a chapter published in the book https://demeterpress.org/books/feminist-parenting-perspectives-from-africa-and-beyond/ (Feminist Parenting: Perspectives from Africa and Beyond), where she wrote about parenting outside the gender binary. Follow Neela on Twitter athttps://twitter.com/NeelaGhoshal ( @NeelaGhoshal).

The children’s publishing industry has long neglected the stories and voices of Black, brown, indigneous, Muslim, Jewish, disabled, transgender and queer peoples - and so many more groups. In this episode, Laura Gruppo, a mom of two, librarian-in-training, and founder of the Instagram account, Laura’s Little Bookshelf, shares what she’s learned about diversity in children’s literature, why books should serve as both “mirrors” and “windows,” and what to do about offensive books. She also shares some of her favorite books and resources. For more recommendations, follow her on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/lauraslittlebookshelf/ (@LaurasLittleBookshelf).

About Laura GruppoLaura Gruppo was born and raised in New York City and now lives in Northern Virginia with her husband and their two young daughters. She received her bachelor’s degree from the University of Pennsylvania, and is currently a graduate student in the online Master of Library and Information Science degree program at San José State University. She hopes to work in youth services librarianship after obtaining her degree. She is a passionate advocate for family literacy, early childhood education, book access, and diversity in children’s literature. She also runs the growing Instagram account https://www.instagram.com/lauraslittlebookshelf/ (@lauraslittlebookshelf), which is dedicated to showcasing high-quality, diverse picture books and promoting youth literacy.

Feminist Crusheshttps://www.marleydias.com/ (Marly Dias, the founder of #1000BlackGirlBooks and her new Netflix show Bookmarks: Celebrating Black Voices)

Emily's Wonder Lab on Netflix, read about it https://www.scarymommy.com/emilys-wonder-lab-netflix-kids-science-stem/ (here)

Mentions:https://www.gofundme.com/f/justice-for-daniel-prude (GoFundMe Account for Daniel Prude) or Venmo @BLMRoc

Antiracism Daily Instagram Account (https://www.instagram.com/antiracismdaily/ (@AntiracismDaily))

https://scenicregional.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/Mirrors-Windows-and-Sliding-Glass-Doors.pdf (Windows, Mirrors and Sliding Glass Doors by Rudine Sims Bishop). See also, https://www.weareteachers.com/mirrors-and-windows/#:~:text=The%20phrase%20%E2%80%9Cmirrors%20and%20windows,view%20into%20someone%20else's%20experience. (What are Mirrors and Windows?)

https://www.corinneduyvis.net/ownvoices/ (#OwnVoices, coined by Corinne Duyvis)

Resources:https://ccbc.education.wisc.edu/ (Cooperative Children’s Book Center at University of Wisconsin-Madison)

https://firstbook.org/ (First Book)

https://reachoutandread.org/ (Reach out and Read)

https://www.rif.org/ (Reading is Fundamental)

http://www.ala.org/alsc/ (Association for Library Service to Children)

https://www.slj.com/ (School Library Journal)

https://www.literacyworldwide.org/ (International Literacy Association)

https://www.naeyc.org/ (National Association for the Education of Young Children)

https://www.zerotothree.org/ (Zero to Three)

https://www.readbrightly.com/how-to-talk-to-kids-about-race-books-and-resources-that-can-help/ (Read Brightly)

https://diversebooks.org/ (We Need Diverse Books)

https://blog.leeandlow.com/ (Lee and Low Publishers blog)

https://www.theconsciouskid.org/ (The Conscious Kid blog)

http://hereweeread.com/ (Here Wee Read)

https://diversebookfinder.org/ (Diverse Book Finder)

Children’s Lit World Instagram Account (https://www.instagram.com/childrenslitworld/ (@childrenslitworld)) and the #ReconsiderLit series

Book recommendationshttps://www.mahoganybooks.com/9781534425361 (Sulwe by Lupita Nyong'o )

https://jesslove.format.com/julian-is-a-mermaid (Julián is a Mermaid by Jessica Love)

https://americanindiansinchildrensliterature.blogspot.com/2019/12/recommended-birdsong-by-julie-flett.html (Birdsong by Julie Flett)

http://mattdelapena.com/books/carmela-full-of-wishes/ (Carmel Full of Wishes by Matt de la Pena)

http://mattdelapena.com/books/last-stop-on-market-street/ (Last Stop on Market Street by Matt de

As the pandemic forces so many households to juggle full time childcare with full time jobs, many women feel like they are being forced to “lean out” of their paid work. In this episode we unpack the impact Sheryl Sandberg’s book, “Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead,” had on our lives, careers, and parenting decisions. It burned both of us, and we tell you why. We dream of a feminism that is bigger than “Lean In,” and share some resources that have guided us along the way.

Feminist Crush

FRIDA Fund: https://youngfeministfund.org/fridas-principles-to-guide-data-technology/ (Principles for guiding data and tech) from a cyber feminist perspective and https://youngfeministfund.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/Happiness-Manifestx-final-single-pages-2-2.pdf (Happiness Manifestx)

The Netflix Show, Sex Education

Quiz References:

Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead, by Sheryl Sandberg

Ehttps://www.nytimes.com/2019/10/10/opinion/sunday/feminism-lean-in.html (nough Leaning In. Let’s Tell Men to Lean Out,) by Ruth Whippman in the New York Times

https://hbr.org/2018/07/lean-in-messages-and-the-illusion-of-control?utm_medium=emailandutm_source=newsletter_weeklyandutm_campaign=weeklyhotlist_activesubs_notdalertnlsubs_movetile_dailyalert_placementtestaandutm_content=signinnudgeandreferral=00202anddeliveryName=DM11439 (“Lean In” Messages and the Illusion of Control) by https://hbr.org/search?term=grainne%20fitzsimons (Grainne Fitzsimons), https://hbr.org/search?term=aaron%20kay (Aaron Kay), and https://hbr.org/search?term=jae%20yun%20kim (Jae Yun Kim)

Suggested resources:

Feminist Fight Club by Jessica Bennet

https://www.nytimes.com/2014/09/07/upshot/a-child-helps-your-career-if-youre-a-man.html (The Motherhood Penalty vs. the Fatherhood Bonus) By http://www.nytimes.com/by/claire-cain-miller (Claire Cain Miller)

https://portside.org/2013-03-26/lean-and-one-percent-feminism (Lean In and the one percent feminism) by Linda Burnam

For the Lean In fans: https://lauravanderkam.com/ (Laura Vanderkam), the https://lauravanderkam.com/podcast/ (Best of Both Worlds Podcast), and the book, https://lauravanderkam.com/books/168-hours/ (You Have More Time than You Think).

Reflection Question: What is your personal role in creating a more just and equitable place for people to work?

Petition to Defund the Metropolitan Police Department: https://actionnetwork.org/petitions/defund-the-metropolitan-police-department/?link_id=3andcan_id=75eae9653811799ed13250ffa5e1ec90andsource=email-stop-police-terror-dc-and-black-lives-matter-dc-condemn

In this episode, we continue the conversation from Episode 6 about sexism in children’s books and talk about how those eight sexist tropes show up in TV and movies too. We talk about representation vs. portrayal and what we can do to help our kids think critically about the way gender is portrayed on the screen. This episode has inspired us to create a bingo card for sexism in kids media and we want your help! Let us know what you’d put on your bingo card.

Feminist Crush:

Lisa: The Fat Sculpture on her dining room table

Lindsey: Laura’s Little Bookshelf on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lauraslittlebookshelf/ (instagram.com/lauraslittlebookshelf/)

Quiz References:

https://www.commonsensemedia.org/sites/default/files/uploads/pdfs/2017_commonsense_watchinggender_executivesummary_0620_1.pdf (Watching Gender: How Stereotypes in Movies and on TV Impact Kids’ Development), from Common Sense Media (2017)

https://static1.squarespace.com/static/5c0da585da02bc56793a0b31/t/5cb8ce1b15fcc0e19f3e16b9/1555615269351/The+Landscape+of+Children%27s+TV.pdf (The Landscape of Children’s Television in the US and Canada), Center for Scholars and Storytellers (April 2019)

https://www.parrotanalytics.com/insights/top-childrens-tv-series-kids-franchises-north-america-usa-canada-mexico/ (Which Children’s Content is Most in Demand in North America?), Parrot Analytics (April 2018)

Resources and Links:

The Conscious Kid https://www.theconsciouskid.org/ (website) and https://www.instagram.com/theconsciouskid/ (Instagram)

About https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Critical_consciousness (Critical Consciousness) and The Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo Freire

https://myfreebingocards.com/bingo-card-generator (Make your own bingo card)

In this episode we discuss eight sexist tropes we’ve found in children’s books, from the traditional damsel in distress to more nuanced and subtle sexism of the perfect girl protagonist who saves everyone’s feelings or the boy character who we just know will grow up to be a mansplainer. We talk about some of the ways we try to counter this sexism and share a few of our favorite books and resources.

Co-hosted by Lisa Ramish and Lindsey Jones-Renaud

Edited by http://cherieturner.com/podcast (Cherie Turner), producer of the Strides Forwards podcast

We went into this podcast with a commitment to bringing up how racism and white supremacy intersect with feminist parenting. But, as white people, we are definitely going to mess up along our journey in doing antiracist work - and we did. In our Episode 4: Play, we had a discussion about Black baby dolls and Santa Claus that was problematic. Our intention was to be pro-Black, but it was actually tokenizing and harmful.

In this episode, we talk with Myisha T. Hill, a Black anti-racist educator, advocate, entrepreneur, and mother to three boys. She helps us talk through what happened, how we can repair harm in times like these, and how we can do better.

Note for our listeners of color: This episode might feel very white-centered and so may not be useful for you. We wanted to give you a heads up so that you can bow out now if this will be triggering or just doesn’t feel like it’s relevant.

About our guest: Myisha T. Hill is an anti racism educator, advocate, and entrepreneur. Most recently seen on CNN and NBC for her revolutionary work with her brand https://checkyourprivilege.co/ (Check Your Privilege). Through courses and community Myisha is on a journey to change the narrative around white privilege. When not working to change the world we live in she can be found in Oakland, California mothering her three beautiful children and supporting social justice through her non profit organization Brown Sisters Speak. Find more about Myisha, buy her book, or join her community at https://checkyourprivilege.co/ (https://checkyourprivilege.co/)

Take Action: Please join us in emailing the publisher, http://www.beacon.org/How-to-Be-Less-Stupid-About-Race-P1388.aspx (Beacon Press), to ask why they appear to be publicizing the book, White Fragility, which was written by a white woman (Robin DiAngelo) more so than the book, https://www.mahoganybooks.com/9780807050774 (How to Be Less Stupid about Race), which was written by a Black woman (Crystal Marie Fleming). Beacon Press is the publisher of both books. In recent months, White Fragility appears to have gotten more attention than How to Be Less Stupid About Race. We all need to be amplifying Black authors like Crystal Marie Fleming right now. Email address: [email protected].

Reflection Question: How do you define being pro-Black in your life and parenting? What does it look like for you?

Note: We hired Myisha as a consultant to advise us on this issue and be interviewed on our podcast. We believe in paying Black anti-racist educators for their labor in teaching white people how do repair harm and do better.

After the murder of George Floyd, as well as LEXI, Breonna Taylor, Nina Pop, Sean Reed, Ahmaud Arbery, Tony Mcdade, James Scurlock, and so many other Black lives at the hands of the police, we will not be releasing any podcasts for the next few weeks. We will be back eventually, but for now, we encourage you to follow, listen and donate to two podcasts created by Black mothers that address issues of race and white supremacy:

https://www.parentingispolitical.org/ (Parenting is Political). Listen https://www.parentingispolitical.org/episodes/rebellion-and-uprising-kitchen-table-talk (here). Follow on https://www.instagram.com/parentingispolitical/ (Instagram) and https://www.facebook.com/ParentingisPolitical/ (Facebook). Donate https://www.parentingispolitical.org/subscribe (here).

https://parentingforliberation.org/ (Parenting for Liberation). Listen https://parentingforliberation.org/podcast/ (here). Follow on https://www.instagram.com/parentingforliberation/ (Instagram) and https://www.facebook.com/Parentingforliberation/ (Facebook). Donate https://parentingforliberation.org/donate/ (here).

We start to dip our toes into the so-called “nature vs nurture” debate as we talk about play, how our kids play, and some of the ways that we try to engage and shape their play from a feminist and social justice perspective. What does play look like in your house? Do you think the way your kids play exhibit behaviors typically associated with their gender? Does it even matter? Please share your comments with us on Instagram, Facebook or our website.