Show Notes Chanelle: hello and welcome to the moms who know podcast. I’m your host Chanelle Neilson and I’m joined today by Nadalie Bardo. Thanks so much for being here. Nadalie is a blogger, coach, photographer, graphic designer. She quit her 9 to 5 to work from home and I wanted to talk to her about slaying goals and getting things done in your life. Nadalie, how were you able to quit your job? N: a series of incidents led me to where I am now. I spent a lot of time in school and when I finally started working full time, I felt so bored. I got all this education to end up being a pleb. I left that job…it wasn’t creative enough and I wanted to do something that was more me. I went to a charity job and got fired and then I was like, I’m done. I just had that sense that the universe was like, “ok, you go do your thing.” I had no job, no money; I started to hustle, do whatever I could, and started the blog. C: I think most people at that junction, with no job, no money, I think most people wouldn’t turn to a side hustle, they would think I have to get another job. Why did you go that route? N: I have had side hustles forever. As a full time student, this was the thing on the side. I had it as a hope of something I would do. When I got fired, I realized this was an excuse, like I can’t do this because I can’t afford it. I’m not saying it’s not a legitimate fear. I hit the point where I realized I could continue to keep living these fears or I could do something different. C: I think that you hit on something really important. A lot of times we use an excuse when it’s really other things. That’s something I’m personally working on, when really it’s another fear that’s holding me back. I’m trying to say, How can I afford it? Instead of immediately saying, “I can’t.” One of the reasons I wanted to have you on is because a lot of my listeners are stay at home moms and I hear a lot, ‘how can I make money at home?” and here you were able to do this working from home, and that is a dream of so many moms. I love how you laid that foundation, and worked on it for a long time ad then you cranked it up. When you’re working from home, you have to want to do it. What’s your motivation? N: I definitely think that motivation is one of those keys to slaying your goals. I think that my motivation is knowing where I want to get and if I slack off I’m not going to get there. I want to help other people realize that they can be afraid of failure of success. If I achieve my goals I can help other people stay motivated to achieve theirs. All the time I’ve already invested in this- I need to see this through. I want this more than I’ve wanted anything. On the daily, what does that mean? My motivation comes from finding a space I can work in, shutting out what’s around me. My noise cancelling headphones give me energy and help me focus on this thing that I’m working on today. C: I love this idea of creating an environment. I was telling Nadalie how I have to work around my one year old, but it comes down to desire, that even when you have those obstacles, you are going to keep doing it even when you have hard times. You hit on something really briefly: fear of failure and fear of success. Can you talk to me about what you see with these? N: It’s easiest to talk about how I battle these opposing fears. Fear of failure is what stops you from starting, or putting your self out there or leaving your comfort zone. We’re almost wired to think it’s not going to work out. We have to reprogram our mind to focus on the light and the positive. Even if we fail it’s not the end. WE fail our way to success. Failure is part of the journey. Getting over that fear is key to getting to the next part. I love this quote: you only need to get it right once. That right time is that success. I think that we tell ourselves all these excuse: tired, money, time, get distracted, etc. I think because we’re kind of married to the struggle. I know for myself, I have to give myself permission to be successful, permission to make money. C: that’s something else I’m working on. I’m trying to be okay with accepting money for providing services. It’s this internal hang-ups. We all have them- things that stop us from starting. These are us holding us back. We have to put ourselves out there and do things, and that’s when things start to happen in our lives. How has fear of success played a role? N: I think it looks differently to different people. It comes with its own problems and its own burdens. Success is completely relative. It’s a struggle to define because I kept asking people if they felt successful. One of the reasons I quit my 9 to 5, is because one guy said, “She’s made it” but that was not success for me. You have to define what your success is to get over reaching it. Success looks different for everyone. C: that is so important! WE have to define what success is. What if we get there, and it’s not what we wanted. I think that can happen to us and so we stay in the comfortable place because we think what if I get there and it’s not what I wanted. You have so many great things about setting goals. Talk to us about some of you best tips on how to achieve your goals. N: So, I find that it really starts at the beginning: setting your goals. Set goals that resonate with you that you are committed to achieving, that you’ve worked out how to achieve. I think we have the big goal, and we have to narrow it down to the day to day. Success is in the day to day, what tin y task can you accomplish today? Achieingng your goals is 20% setting is and 80% slaying it. What do you need to focus, what inspires you, accountability partner. Call each other out on your fears. Realize how you work best and figure out what you need to do every day so that you take action and not keep going back and planning. You can spend time planning but have every excuse not to take that first step. How do you get yourself to move, to take an imperfect action? You almost have to set a fire in your belly so you can’t just sit there. C: so many people really want these things in their lives, what holds people back? N: One of the best ways to not get overwhelmed is focusing on the tiny things that we can do. Instead of saying I have a goal for the whole year, figure out what is this tiny part I can work on. When you’re focused on what you need to do now, it’s about shrinking it down and knowing what you need to do today and training your mind to not wander and focus on everything else, but to focus in the now. C: give us an example of how you take this big goal and break it down N: My goal last year was to create the “slay your goals planner.” My first action is to brain dump all my possible ideas: decide what pages, design, working one chapter at a time, get feedback, edits, research other planners, etc. and I would ask myself. Which one goes first? Sometimes they come together like a caterpillar- you need one to get to the next task. I ask myself certain questions: what is important and what is urgent? I like to ask myself, is anyone going to notice if I don’t do this? If the answer is no, then I don’t do it, or it’s not a priority. If it’s no, it’s priority number one. C: I think that helps and breaks it down. I love that process of breaking it down. In “getting things done” they talk about the next action: the simplest, smallest thing. Sometimes things are dependent on each other. It kind of lays it out for you. N: sometimes what helps is you start at the end an work yourself backwards. I want to make that planner a physical planner, so I work my way backward and take those steps. Let’s go back to getting in shape. Sometimes we have a weight goal, like 6 months, what do I need to lose every month to make that goal. C; That’s Steven Covey- Begin with the End in Mind. It’s valuable to brainstorm. I know for me if I don’t get that down on paper, it feels overwhelming, once I can see it, it starts to come together. I’m glad you mentioned your planner. I really like how you ask important questions. There’s a lot on your blog and you really help people think, like your review your year. N: my website is “it’sallyouboo” and you’ll see free resources and the slay your goals planner. C: it’s been fun taking to you. I think you have a lot of good stuff and I hope the listeners have gotten the wheels turning and everyone, we’ll see you next time on Moms Who Know. http://itsallyouboo.com
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