More In Common

So many things try to dictate how we act. It's easy to follow when we don't know who we really are. 

In Part 2 of this conversation with Jessica, we really get into what it looks like to navigate acting most aligned to who you are and not what you are told.

The navigation of self within the social structures of our social ecosystems is a balance many do not achieve.  Jessica gets into what this looks like for her as she is an example of what is truly possible to live a happy life. 

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Today we are with Jessica Frew, co-host of the "Husband in Law" Podcast.  A podcast for those who are open-minded enough to let go of the religious and social norms they have been taught we should all fit into.

Steve, Jessica, and Matt walk through the science of making a relationship successful.  Steve and Jessica were happily married for seven years until Steve came out as being gay, which inevitably ended in divorce. Now, Matt and Jessica have been happily married for six years.

Matt, Jessica, and Steve have a relationship that, by most standards, would be considered atypical.

Sharing stories of love, marriage, children, divorce, the struggles of religious norms, homosexuality, and trying to be our best selves, this podcast holds nothing back and shares what most people are scared to talk about.

Jessica is really passionate about Living a BOLD life and how it not only impacts us personally but also in the way we show up in our relationships.

Topics we discuss:

• Managing judgement
  • Being divorced in the Mormon Church

References:

• Husband in Law Podcast

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

Life can be complex, with so many different influences on how we see ourselves.  Our identity is wrapped up in so many things that we can easily lose sight of who we really are.

Jessica is a shining example of understanding yourself.  She carries many labels.  Those labels could easily cause her to act in a way that is expected by others.

Yet, it doesn't change who she is.  She wears her labels with pride and still is able to maintain grace and acceptance of others. 

Her compassion emanates from her, and her ability to be who she is with confidence gives her the greatest opportunity to leave a positive impact on this world.

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Today we are with Jessica Frew, co-host of the "Husband in Law" Podcast.  A podcast for those who are open-minded enough to let go of the religious and social norms they have been taught we should all fit into.

Steve, Jessica, and Matt walk through the science of making a relationship successful.  Steve and Jessica were happily married for seven years until Steve came out as being gay, which inevitably ended in divorce. Now, Matt and Jessica have been happily married for six years.

Matt, Jessica, and Steve have a relationship that, by most standards, would be considered atypical.

Sharing stories of love, marriage, children, divorce, the struggles of religious norms, homosexuality, and trying to be our best selves, this podcast holds nothing back and shares what most people are scared to talk about.

Jessica is really passionate about Living a BOLD life and how it not only impacts us personally but also in the way we show up in our relationships.

Topics we discuss:

- Planning out difficult conversations

• Exploring the emotions

- Living a bold life

• Doing what feels right to you

- Setting personal boundaries

References:

• Husband in Law Podcast

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

Our perspective is dramatically shaped by our personal experiences.  Hearing how other people perceive based on their lived experience is a great way to expand your perspective.

In America, we see change as slow and rarely accomplished.  However, when you talk to someone from another country, their perspective of slowness is very different because it truly does take a lifetime for change to occur.

Carlos provides a great perspective on cultural change in this part of the conversation.  Maybe it will help you see a different point of view. 

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Today we are with Carlos "Lonelez" Rosario Gonzalez.  Lonelez began his journey in the music industry as a graphic designer. Having designed for names such as Ozuna, Mozart La Para, J Alvarez, and Natti Natasha, he discovered that his true passion was in music production. Soon, Lonelez began to remix popular songs and it wasn't long until his remixes began to garner favorable attention.

His trap remix of Daddy Yankee's Shaky Shaky became an internet sensation, and his bachata remix of Plan B's Fanatica Sensual was danced all over the world. In 2021, his reggaeton remix of Taylor Swift's Willow became a viral sound on TikTok.

He is now putting lyrics to his beats and, after releasing his first independent album Atraccion in 2018, and recently released his EP LaRomcom. His songs are those of love, adventure, party-going, and fun, with a bilingual touch that's purely unique to Lonelez.

Carlos also has written the romance novel series "The Bohemians".

Topics we discuss:

• Machismo and his mindset about it

• Speed of cultural change

• U.S. vs Dominican

• Falling in love

References:

• Carlos' Books

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

We create labels to simplify how we see the world. It's an important part of how our brain works.

However, those labels can, and often do, cheat us out of really getting to know someone.

Carlos is a musician. It's easy to come to this conversation with a lot of biases and assumptions based on that one label alone.

What you learn about Carlos in this episode though will change how you look at him as a musician.  This conversation is a great example of how our assumptions can limit our ability to truly know what someone wants from life and who they are.

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Today we are with Carlos "Lonelez" Rosario Gonzalez.  Lonelez began his journey in the music industry as a graphic designer. Having designed for names such as Ozuna, Mozart La Para, J Alvarez, and Natti Natasha, he discovered that his true passion was in music production. Soon, Lonelez began to remix popular songs, and it wasn't long until his remixes began to garner favorable attention.

His trap remix of Daddy Yankee's Shaky Shaky became an internet sensation, and his bachata remix of Plan B's Fanatica Sensual was danced all over the world. In 2021, his reggaeton remix of Taylor Swift's Willow became a viral sound on TikTok.

He is now putting lyrics to his beats and after releasing his first independent album Atraccion in 2018, and recently released his EP LaRomcom. His songs are those of love, adventure, party-going, and fun, with a bilingual touch that's purely unique to Lonelez.

Carlos also has written the romance novel series "The Bohemians."

Topics we discuss:

• Smile to defuse

                ○ Authentically Smiling

                ○ Finding the best in others

• Masculinity as a Social Construct

                ○ His novels

                ○ Being ourself

                ○ What it's like in the Dominican Republic

• Influence of his childhood on his decisions

                ○ Self-Identity

• Fear and how he shows up through it and with it

References:

• Carlos' Books

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

Meditation is amazing.  It helps us focus, learn calm, train being present, and can help us rewire how we think about the world.

What if you can't meditate? Is it not for you?    

So many actually have a hard time meditating. It's a learned skill, and not everyone can access it.  The truth is, many feel like they are broken because they can't do it.  They are missing out on something people swear by and are left out of a cultural movement.

Do you feel that way? 

This conversation presents another option.  The key isn't meditation.  Rather, it's about finding the opportunity to train to be present, learning calm, and being focused on what is in front of you.

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Today we are with Lincoln Hoppe. Crazy fact, he is actually related to Abraham Lincoln and was named after him.

Lincoln is a film actor in Los Angles and is the lead in a feature called Witnesses that hit theaters on June 4th.  It was top 10 for box office sales and made it up to the top 6. It was the #1 faith-based film.

He is also a produced feature screenwriter and multi-award winner audiobook narrator and voice actor.  And, if not enough, is an acting and improvisation teacher at Playhouse west and Meisner school in North Hollywood.

He is passionate about improvisation. He believes strongly that improv is not just for improv shows and auditions, but it's healthy for the brain, as it skyrockets skills of creativity, spontaneity, and confidence.

He has a complete video on demand course called improv wizards…

He loves to hike, play stringed instruments such as Guitar, mandolin, bass, dulcimer, Bouziki… loves board games, and dungeons and dragons.

Oh, and he has 5 kids.

Topics we discuss:

• Learning to take a breath

References:

• Lincoln's Website

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

Meditation is amazing.  It helps us focus, learn calm, train being present, and can help us rewire how we think about the world.

What if you can't meditate? Is it not for you?    

So many actually have a hard time meditating. It's a learned skill, and not everyone can access it.  The truth is, many feel like they are broken because they can't do it.  They are missing out on something people swear by and are left out of a cultural movement.

Do you feel that way? 

This conversation presents another option.  The key isn't meditation.  Rather, it's about finding the opportunity to train to be present, learning calm, and being focused on what is in front of you.

///

Today we are with Lincoln Hoppe. Crazy fact, he is actually related to Abraham Lincoln and was named after him.

Lincoln is a film actor in Los Angles and is the lead in a feature called Witnesses that hit theaters on June 4th.  It was top 10 for box office sales and made it up to the top 6. It was the #1 faith-based film.

He is also a produced feature screenwriter and multi-award winner audiobook narrator and voice actor.  And, if not enough, is an acting and improvisation teacher at Playhouse west and Meisner school in North Hollywood.

He is passionate about improvisation. He believes strongly that improv is not just for improv shows and auditions, but it's healthy for the brain, as it skyrockets skills of creativity, spontaneity, and confidence.

He has a complete video on demand course called improv wizards…

He loves to hike, play stringed instruments such as Guitar, mandolin, bass, dulcimer, Bouziki… loves board games, and dungeons and dragons.

Oh, and he has 5 kids.

Topics we discuss:

• Learning to take a breath

• Play

• The story of how he found Improv

References:

• Lincoln's Website

Credits:

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

What stands in your way of feeling accomplished?

Is it your habits or behaviors? 

Our guest Melissa Stecher is a mom, owner, creator, and a master of taking control of her life. She's walked the long road of changing habits, behaviors, and her mindset to bring hope into her life. Her inspiring conversation provides hope to others that they to can do the same.

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Today we are with Melissa Stecher.  She is the owner & creator of Hopeful Simplicity. In 2017 she reached her snapping point. As a mom, full-time employee, co-parent, blending families, some personal health issues and still being asked all those 'at-home' questions like 'what's for dinner?' she broke.

She was angry and tired all the time and knew that wasn't the person she wanted to be. This is when

she started swapping. Swapping bad habits for better ones, like making her bed each

morning just to feel like she was accomplishing something each day.

They swapped harsh chemical products for natural options and the whole home team started cleaning. They even swapped unsuccessful organizing systems for compromised successes. In 2018 she took a leap of faith in herself and got certified as a professional organizer. Now, not only does she get to save time, save money and live less stressed but she gets to help others find Hope in their chaos & clutter.

Topics we discuss:

• Just shutting up

References:

• Chris Hemsworth

• Chris Evans - Body Image issues

Credits:

Lead editor + Producer: Ruf Holmes

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

What stands in your way of feeling accomplished?

Is it your habits or behaviors? 

Our guest Melissa Stecher is a mom, owner, creator, and a master of taking control of her life. She's walked the long road of changing habits, behaviors, and her mindset to bring hope into her life. Her inspiring conversation provides hope to others that they to can do the same.

///

Today we are with Melissa Stecher.  She is the owner & creator of Hopeful Simplicity. In 2017 she reached her snapping point. As a mom, full-time employee, co-parent, blending families, some personal health issues and still being asked all those 'at-home' questions like 'what's for dinner?' she broke.

She was angry and tired all the time and knew that wasn't the person she wanted to be. This is when

she started swapping. Swapping bad habits for better ones, like making her bed each

morning just to feel like she was accomplishing something each day.

They swapped harsh chemical products for natural options and the whole home team started cleaning. They even swapped unsuccessful organizing systems for compromised successes. In 2018 she took a leap of faith in herself and got certified as a professional organizer. Now, not only does she get to save time, save money and live less stressed but she gets to help others find Hope in their chaos & clutter.

Topics we discuss:

• Just shutting up

References:

• Chris Hemsworth

Credits:

Lead editor + Producer: Ruf Holmes

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

What is culture?  Do you think we have a common, national culture?

It’s complicated…

Culture is an amalgamation of ideas, histories, life experiences and many other things.  Every culture has subcultures, and the more connected we become the more culture becomes dispersed.

This is a challenge for many as we look to define what our common culture is and could be. 

In this conversation with Ashwin, we talk deeply about what that looks like.  And we dig in on some ideas that could easily be chalked up to biases and prejudices.  But, with listening and deep questioning, we really understand where the ideas come from.

Not just base them on the comments made. 

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Today we are with Ashwin Chacko.  Ashwin is a multi-disciplined illustrator, designer & hand-letterer, working and living in Dublin. He develops and designs conceptual illustrations for advertising campaigns, products, packaging, editorials, children’s books and one off commissions from around the world.

He has published 3 books, "Little Optimist", "Keep At It", and the Children's book "What wondrous Shapes We Are". 

His style is influenced by contemporary culture and is rooted in his love for music, comics, tattoos and street art. He loves telling stories, and is interested in uncovering the social interactions that drive culture.  

He seeks to capture these moments in bold lines & shapes.  His compositions focuses on a strong use of characters intermingled with typography and patterns. He aims to help brands bring people together through the stories embedded in his illustrations.

Topics we discuss:

• Listening and Asking questions as key to navigating conversation

References:

• Ashwin's Books

Credits:

Lead editor + Producer: Ruf Holmes

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats

What is culture?  Do you think we have a common, national culture?

It’s complicated…

Culture is an amalgamation of ideas, histories, life experiences and many other things.  Every culture has subcultures, and the more connected we become the more culture becomes dispersed.

This is a challenge for many as we look to define what our common culture is and could be. 

In this conversation with Ashwin, we talk deeply about what that looks like.  And we dig in on some ideas that could easily be chalked up to biases and prejudices.  But, with listening and deep questioning, we really understand where the ideas come from.

Not just base them on the comments made. 

///

Today we are with Ashwin Chacko.  Ashwin is a multi-disciplined illustrator, designer & hand-letterer, working and living in Dublin. He develops and designs conceptual illustrations for advertising campaigns, products, packaging, editorials, children’s books and one off commissions from around the world.

He has published 3 books, "Little Optimist", "Keep At It", and the Children's book "What wondrous Shapes We Are". 

His style is influenced by contemporary culture and is rooted in his love for music, comics, tattoos and street art. He loves telling stories, and is interested in uncovering the social interactions that drive culture.  

He seeks to capture these moments in bold lines & shapes.  His compositions focuses on a strong use of characters intermingled with typography and patterns. He aims to help brands bring people together through the stories embedded in his illustrations.

Topics we discuss:

• Listening and Asking questions as key to navigating conversation

References:

• Ashwin's Books

Credits:

Lead editor + Producer: Ruf Holmes

Music:

Main Theme: "Eaze Does It" by Shye Eaze and DJ Rufbeats, a More In Common Podcast Exclusive.

All music created by DJ Rufbeats