Humility is not something that's very highly valued in our world today, but it is a command of us as believers. Let's look together at how Christ is our example of humility and how we can be more like Him!

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk; I’m Hannah Rebekah. This week, we’re talking about the Facet of the Fruit of the Spirit called humility. This is not included in the list in Galatians 5, but I could argue that humility is actually the root of the whole Fruit of the Spirit. None of the qualities we’ve looked at so far can be accomplished without humility. I would also argue that pride, the opposite of humility, is the original sin and the root of all sin, but that’s a little outside the scope of what I want to talk about today.

So what is humility? In the Old Testament, most of the words used for humility either meant or carried the connotation of being low or lowly. In the New Testament, there are only three words used, and they all carry this same meaning, as well. This gives us a good starting point for what humility means. We can picture someone kneeling before a king or master. Physical positioning has always connoted rank in human society. If you are higher up physically, you’re higher up in rank, too. This is why thrones are elevated from the floor around them, why drill sergeants push into trainee’s faces and physically look down on them, and why we imagine God as physically above us, even though Heaven is not even in this dimension. To be high up is to be superior; to be low is to be inferior.

We all want to be superior. It’s ingrained in our sin nature to seek a better position, more respect, more honor, more glory. This is our pride showing up. Even those who modern psychology would say need more self-confidence are prideful. As C.S. Lewis pointed out, humility is not going around telling everyone how lowly and poor and bad-off you are. That is just seeking attention and recognition in a different way.

I am painfully aware of my own pride, which feels like both a curse and a blessing at times. I’m constantly wondering what other people are thinking of me, whether strangers or friends, and trying to do things that will increase their opinion of me. I hate it. It’s gotten a little better over the years, especially as I learned about identity in Christ, but it’s always there, lurking in the background.

I bet you can relate. What exactly we want people to think of us is different from person to person because of personality and experiences, but we all want others to think and notice certain things about us and, ultimately, to think well of us, whatever that means to each person.

Instead of this, the New Testament writers command humility of us. 1 Peter 5:5 says, “Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’” The word for pride here literally means “over-shine,” as if the person is calling attention to themselves more than they have the right to. The word for humility, what Peter says we are to clothe ourselves with, means “a deep sense of moral littleness.” I love that.

This means true humility comes when we recognize the perfect moral purity of God and then also recognize our own deep moral failings. When done well, this leads us into a sense of wonder at God and the grace He shows us in choosing and redeeming and using us in His righteous plans.

Philippians 2:3-11 says, “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”

Here we have a command (don’t be selfish but be humble), the power to do the command (have this mind, which is yours in Christ Jesus), the perfect example of living out the command (Jesus’ death on the cross), and the reward for following through (exaltation by God). Let’s break it down and take it piece by piece.

“Do nothing from selfish ambition…” The word translated as “selfish ambition” carries the idea of a mercenary, someone who does whatever they can for personal gain, regardless of the consequences to others. In war time, mercenaries will fight for whoever is the highest bidder. They have no loyalty to one party or another and have the potential to double-cross their employer if offered higher pay. When we live without humility, we are like mercenaries who work only for our sin natures. Whatever looks like it will give us the best high, the most money, or the most attention, we do it, and who we hurt in the process doesn’t matter, so long as the right people still think of us what we want them to think.

“Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit…” The word for conceit means “baseless pride,” so this means “don’t do anything just because you think you’re all that and a bag of chips.” We all know people who walk around with a swagger and a chip on their shoulder. They expect the world to be handed to them just because. That’s this baseless pride or conceit.

“...but in humility”—that’s the same word that means thinking of yourself as morally little—“count others more significant than yourselves.” The idea behind “more significant” is literally “higher.” So it is coming from the same word picture we looked at earlier of thrones and bowing. We should essentially think of those around us as a higher rank than we are. So the same way we would treat a superior military officer, a judge, a government official, a pastor, or a professor is the way we should treat each other—with deference, respect, and an awareness of their needs.

“Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” This is expounding on the previous idea. Not only are we to think about ourselves and our own needs and cares but also those of the people around us.

“Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus…” “Mind” here is really the way you think and interpret the world and the actions you do because of that. We might say “worldview” instead. So we’re to see things through the same lens that Jesus saw them and act accordingly. (Side note: The Greek doesn’t actually say “which is yours in Christ Jesus.” The ESV doesn’t do a great job translating that. It’s more like “Have the same mind that Jesus had,” but the implication of the context and the rest of Paul’s writings is that if Jesus had it and it’s a command for believers, you can have it by the power of the Holy Spirit.)

“...who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.” This is so huge. Jesus had every right NOT to be humble. He is God Himself, after all. But instead of viewing His equality with God the Father as something He needed to keep and hold onto, He gave it up for the sake of our good and His glory later on. Just the idea that the Creator of the world would become like one of His helpless creatures and then allow Himself to be killed by them for their own good is so difficult to grasp. And then to remember that when people don’t think of us the way we want them to, we get mad. How petty we can be.

“Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.” Here we see the reward Jesus received on the other side of the cross. We have a similar reward waiting for us. Just look at a few passages:

James 4:10, “Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will exalt you.”

1 Peter 5:6, “Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you.”

Luke 14:11, “For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.”

Some of this can happen in this life. We can see examples around us of those who have been humble before God and sought the good of others and now have a platform and a following because of it. But we don’t always see the exaltation here and now, and the better part of this will come in Heaven, when God rewards those who have followed Him.

So if believers can have the same perspective as Jesus, seeing others as higher ranked than themselves and deserving of love and sacrifice, what form of humility can the world have? In general, humility is not a value of the world. Our culture preaches self-confidence and encourages people to push their limits and get as far up the ladder as they can. When people speak words of caution or try to place boundaries, they say things like, “You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life.” All those who don’t support you being your “best self” can just get out of the way.

However, there are those who are not believers who appear very self-sacrificing or self-depreciating. I think there are two types here. One we talked about at the beginning, those who say they are nothing and not worthy of love or attention but desperately want it and wish they were. These are the people Lewis says are not humble because they’re always talking about how worthless and unworthy they are.

The second group is those who do great and impressive things for good causes. They appear self-sacrificing and humble, but on the inside, they are doing all of it because they want the attention and admiration that comes from it. If you were to give them the option to do it all under the table so that no one knew about it, they wouldn’t take it, because that would defeat the point. This is why Jesus says in Matthew 6 not to “let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,” to call out those who were only doing good so that others would notice.

There is often an objection that comes with teaching about humility. “If I am always humble and looking out for others and not trying to fill my own needs, who will care for me?” First off, we should recognize that Paul does not say, “Let each of you look out only for the interests of others.” We are not to be slaves to other people and never care for ourselves. We are to view others as superior to ourselves and thus prioritize their needs whenever possible. The second answer to this is the beauty of God’s perfect plan for Christian community. Because we all have different skills, resources, and spiritual gifts, the only way for everyone’s needs to be met is if everyone is looking at those around them for the ways their specific gifts can fill those needs. When everyone is filling others needs, everyone’s needs are met. This works so much better than when each person is only trying to get their own needs met, because in order to meet our own needs, we need other people’s gifts and abilities. We are not enough for ourselves. When we’re all self-seeking, we have to haggle and manipulate others to take care of us instead of themselves. When we’re all doing what we can for those around us, everyone’s gifts, abilities, and resources are utilized to their fullest potential, and everyone’s needs get met to the fullest extent possible. It’s really beautiful when it works the way it’s designed.

So how do we get more humility? We touched on one of the best ways at the beginning. The more clearly we see God for who He is, the more obvious our own moral failings become, and the more humble we are. Another way is to be intentional about looking outside ourselves and seeing the world from other people’s perspectives. It is so easy to go through life only thinking about yourself, your needs, your desires and dreams, your struggles, etc. But all we need to do is ask a few questions of those around us to see that our lives are not the only ones with depth. Other people are hurting and celebrating and worrying, too. When we become aware of that, it is humbling, and a world of opportunities for service and kindness opens before us.

In conclusion, we are to think of ourselves as morally little, always in need of the grace of the Holy Spirit. We’re to think of those around us as ranked higher than us, treating them with respect. And we’re to see the world through the lens Jesus used, always ready to sacrifice our comfort and reputation for the sake of the Kingdom, remembering that God will reward us and vindicate us on the other side.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. Visit my website at storiesbyhr.com for more great content and to see if I can help you tell your story better. I hope you’ll join me next time when we finish our series by looking at the spirit of forgiveness.

Unity in the church is a hot-button issue--and it should be! But how do we achieve it? Many think we should either avoid teaching or compromise on doctrines that are hard to understand, but there is a better way.

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk; I’m Hannah Rebekah. This week, we’re talking about the facet of the Fruit of the Spirit called unity. Again, this is not one of the aspects listed in the Galatians 5 passage, but we can be sure that it is a part of the Fruit of the Spirit because it is commanded by God (through Paul and others) of believers and promised through the power of the Spirit.

The idea of Christian unity comes from all over the New Testament. 1 Corinthians 1:10 says, “I appeal to you, brothers, by the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, that all of you agree, and that there be no divisions among you, but that you be united in the same mind and the same judgment.”

1 Peter 3:8, “Now finally, all of you should be like-minded and sympathetic, should love believers,  and be compassionate and humble.”

Philippians 2:2-3 "fulfill my joy by thinking the same way, having the same love, sharing the same feelings, focusing on one goal. Do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves."

There are many more. The theme we can see through these verses is that of having “no divisions” and the “same mind.” Before we get into what this means, let’s look at what it does not mean.

I have observed that most Christians (maybe all), at some point relatively early in their spiritual growth, reach a point when they look around and realize that there are so many different beliefs and disagreements between those claiming the title of “Christian,” and they feel a grief about this. I think this is a good, Spirit-led grief. We should be saddened that there are so many divisions within the Church. However, I have also seen that the common, knee-jerk reaction is to want to compromise on what we believe so that everyone can be together. “Maybe if we just focus on the gospel and not all the other theological issues, we can all worship together as one and not have these divisions.”

This is a deadly dangerous response. We cannot compromise on truth for the sake of perceived unity. First of all, Paul himself says in 1 Corinthians 11:17-18 that there must be divisions, otherwise we won’t know who the true believers are. “For to begin with, I hear that when you come together as a church there are divisions among you, and in part I believe it. There must, indeed, be factions among you, so that those who are approved may be recognized among you.”

Second, if we look at the history of the church, we can see that the denominations which hide the harder and more controversial truths of the faith and focus solely on the gospel and other “easy” truths are the ones that quickly slip from truth all together. The gospel is upheld by foundational truths, such as God’s total sovereignty, the trinity, the virgin birth, the total depravity of man, and so many more. Without a thorough understanding of these things, the gospel loses its power and wonder.

God is never served by watering down or avoiding truths because they are hard or divisive.

So if that’s not the path to Christian unity, what is? How do we have the “same mind” that Paul and Peter command?

I want to look at two passages more in depth.

Ephesians 4:1-8, 11-16 says, “Therefore I, the prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk worthy of the calling you have received, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, accepting one another in love, diligently keeping the unity of the Spirit with the peace that binds us. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope at your calling— one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is above all and through all and in all.

“Now grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of the Messiah’s gift. For it says: ‘When He ascended on high, He took prisoners into captivity; He gave gifts to people.’ ...

“And He personally gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, for the training of the saints in the work of ministry, to build up the body of Christ, until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of God’s Son, growing into a mature man with a stature measured by Christ’s fullness. Then we will no longer be little children, tossed by the waves and blown around by every wind of teaching, by human cunning with cleverness in the techniques of deceit. But speaking the truth in love, let us grow in every way into Him who is the head—Christ. From Him the whole body, fitted and knit together by every supporting ligament, promotes the growth of the body for building up itself in love by the proper working of each individual part.”

Romans 12:3-19 says, “For by the grace given to me, I tell everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he should think. Instead, think sensibly, as God has distributed a measure of faith to each one. Now as we have many parts in one body, and all the parts do not have the same function, in the same way we who are many are one body in Christ and individually members of one another. According to the grace given to us, we have different gifts:

“‘If prophecy, use it according to the standard of one’s faith; if service, in service; if teaching, in teaching; if exhorting, in exhortation; giving, with generosity; leading, with diligence; showing mercy, with cheerfulness.’

“Love must be without hypocrisy. Detest evil; cling to what is good. Show family affection to one another with brotherly love. Outdo one another in showing honor. Do not lack diligence; be fervent in spirit; serve the Lord. Rejoice in hope; be patient in affliction; be persistent in prayer. Share with the saints in their needs; pursue hospitality. Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep. Be in agreement with one another. Do not be proud; instead, associate with the humble. Do not be wise in your own estimation. Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Try to do what is honorable in everyone’s eyes. If possible, on your part, live at peace with everyone. Friends, do not avenge yourselves; instead, leave room for His wrath. For it is written: Vengeance belongs to Me; I will repay, says the Lord.”

Did you hear any similarities in those two passages? Both of these passages are talking about how to live in unified community with one another. The Romans passage doesn’t specifically mention unity, but Paul does say “we who are many are one body in Christ.” And if you look at the list of principles for Christian living, the result of living those out would be unity.

Before we get too far into this, I want to point out that there are two different types of unity. One is living in community together and getting along and not quarreling. The other is to think the same and be on the same page. I think they are tied together but separate concepts. In the passages we saw at the beginning of the episode, the biblical authors are talking about the second type of unity, and that’s what we’re focusing on today. I believe it is easier to get to being on the same page with one person or a group of people if you live together in community than it is if you are apart. I think this is a major reason for why God organized the Church to have local bodies of believers who are intended to live life together and not just come together one day a week. I think it’s also a major purpose of God’s in marriage, but that’s for another day.

Both of these passages—Ephesians 4 and Romans 12—are written to local bodies of believers and geared more toward (but not exclusively, especially the Ephesians one) the first type of unity—that of getting along. However, there are principles here to help us with the second type as well.

The first similarity we see is Paul calling for humility. This is of the utmost importance. I was sitting with a friend the other day, and he said something like, “It would be arrogant of us to believe we were born into the correct denomination.” I think there’s a lot of truth to that. If we are going to be “of one mind,” we first have to be willing to be wrong. I guarantee you that there are things you grew up being taught about God and the Bible that are false. I guarantee it. We have to be willing to question every teaching and belief and compare them with Scripture to find the truth.

The second similarity is the reminder of our oneness in Christ. This is where our power to be of one mind comes from and why we are to be of one mind in the first place. Romans 15:5-6 says, “Now may the God who gives endurance and encouragement allow you to live in harmony with one another, according to the command of Christ Jesus, so that you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ with a united mind and voice.” Here we see the tie between the two types of unity, the source of power for accomplishing both, and the reason for them—“so that you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.” We must seek to be one in Christ, by the power of Spirit, for the glory of the Father. Unity, like everything else, is from God, through God, and for God.

The third similarity we see in these two passages is the mention of spiritual gifts. This is important because it reminds us that we are to be one in purpose, power, and doctrine, but we are not called to be one in method. There are many different personalities, abilities, and spiritual gifts within the local and global church, and they are all necessary.

After these similarities come to an end, Paul continues in Ephesians 4 by saying that if we use our spiritual gifts “for the training the saints in the work of ministry, [and] to build up the body of Christ,” then the whole body will “reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of God’s Son” and grow into mature saints. This is the other reason spiritual gifts and the local body of believers is so important. When we are all actively participating in the local church and using our spiritual gifts, it helps us all to become equipped, built up, and full of faith in God and knowledge of Him. From that knowledge of God comes the maturity to recognize false doctrine, as we see in verse 14.

Thus, we are not to avoid speaking about sound doctrine, but those of us who are mature are to speak the truth in love so that we can all grow more like Christ and have the same mind that He has on everything.

So what do we do when we disagree? First of all, to the best of your ability, make sure that you are, in fact, right. Do the research; ask knowledgeable spiritual leaders in your life; look up opposing opinions online. When it comes to any doctrine, don’t just know what you believe, know why you believe it, and always be willing to be proved wrong. My best example of this is that I grew up in a denomination that preached the rapture. When I went to college, I came across some beliefs that called that into question, so I started doing the work. Now I don’t believe the rapture is biblical (but that’s also a topic for another time).

Second, speak the truth in love. If you are in a doctrinal disagreement with someone and you’re sure you’re correct, have a conversation with them that’s based in truth (not opinion or personal experience) and do it calmly and with care. Maybe you convince them, and maybe you don’t, but they should not walk away from the conversation doubting whether or not you’re still their friend or thinking you might be angry with them.

The third thing is that you have to be prepared for them to not be convinced right away. Paul gives us a good example of this in Philippians 3:15-16. Paul finishes his discourse on the futility of works and the righteousness that comes through Christ, and then he says, “Therefore, all who are mature should think this way. And if you think differently about anything, God will reveal this also to you. In any case, we should live up to whatever truth we have attained.” Once we have presented our case, we must leave it in God’s hands and trust that the Holy Spirit will convince those who are believers of the truth.

So if unity is a facet of the Fruit of the Spirit, what is it that not believers can have? This is a fascinating question—well, I always think that—but I think it’s especially interesting in this case. We all know unbelievers who rally themselves around a cause or idea or organization. They are unified in their support. What’s the difference between that and the church?

I think there is one major difference. Most often, nonbelievers begin unified in their thinking and then find each other. As far as I know, only the Holy Spirit has the power to bring people together from all walks of life, all corners of the world, all personalities, all belief systems, cultures, and religious heritages, and change them to be unified in their thinking and living—and all without cohersion. Christianity is not a group of people who all believed roughly the same thing and then came together to form a group. Even from the beginning of Jesus’ ministry, He pulled people from different backgrounds and experiences and changed their very way of thinking and being to reflect Himself. That is the power of Holy Spirit given unity.

In conclusion, let us remember this: all truth is God’s truth. If we consistently seek God and try to learn more about Him and His Word with a spirit of humility, we will find ourselves growing more and more unified with the believers around us who are doing the same. When we find ourselves in disagreement, let us speak the truth in love and pray for humility, wisdom, and understanding for ourselves and those we are talking to.

Thanks for listening to More than Milk. Visit my website at storiesbyhr.com for more great content and to see if I can help you tell your story better. I hope you’ll join me next time when we talk about humility.

Thankfulness has a power to transform our attitude and outlook on life. It's no wonder scripture commands it of us! Let's look at how it is possible to be thankful even when life is hard.

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk; I’m Hannah Rebekah. Today we are talking about thankfulness, which is a part of the Fruit of the Spirit not mentioned in the Galatians 5 passage. How do we know it’s a part of the Fruit of the Spirit, then? Let’s look at Ephesians 5:18-21, “And don’t get drunk with wine, which leads to reckless actions, but be filled by the Spirit: speaking to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing and making music from your heart to the Lord, giving thanks always for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, submitting to one another in the fear of Christ.”

Paul says here to be filled by the Spirit and then lists a bunch of things that are a result of being filled with the Spirit. This list includes singing to each other and to God, giving thanks always and for everything, and submitting to one another. Additionally, there are many commands in the New Testament to be thankful, and we know that nothing God commands us to do can be done apart from the Spirit, which also means this must be part of the Fruit of the Spirit. Romans 1:21 even goes so far as to say that a failure to express gratitude to God is a mark of an unbeliever. Clearly, we had better pay attention!

So what is thankfulness? In the New Testament, the Greek words that we translate as “thank,” “thanksgiving,” and “thankfulness” all come from the root word charis. Charis is most often translated as “grace,” and it means “favor” and has the idea of giving something away for free. The thankfulness words use this word, charis, and another Greek word that means “good” or “well.” So translated loosely, these compound words mean “good gift” or “good grace.” The idea is that God gives us gifts (life, salvation, trials, friendship, food, etc.), and we recognize those gifts as good and express that we think they’re good to God in some way. So when I drink my coffee in the morning and it just hits the spot, I can recognize coffee in general and that perfect moment specifically as good gifts from God and tell Him I appreciate them.

The bigger and more undeserved the gift, the more thankfulness abounds. Just think about your own life. When have you been given help, money, encouragement or something else that you felt like you were completely undeserving of? Didn’t your heart want to explode with thankfulness toward the giver? I remember back in September, I was packing up to move back up north after losing my job. A friend and her kids came over to help me. She packed my entire kitchen that day. I was so overwhelmed with gratitude. I had only known her for a year and had by no means earned all the things she and her family had done for me, including that day. There was no way I could ever repay her; all I could do was let her know just how grateful I was. I wished I could connect my heart to hers and show her just how much this seemingly simple act meant to me.

So if the bigger the gift and the less we deserve it, the more thankful we are, then it makes sense that God should receive more gratitude than anyone else! The Bible talks a lot about being thankful. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says, “Give thanks in everything, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6 says, “Don’t worry about anything, but in everything, through prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.”

It’s one thing to say, “Be thankful for everything all the time,” but if you’re anything like me, you need specifics before that can really sink in. Here are just a few of the ways and times the Bible commands us to be thankful:

•       With praise/as an act of praise (Psalm 100:4, 106:1, 107:1, 69:30, 95:2, 1 Chron 16:34)

o   In singing (Psalm 28:7)

The Psalms are full of this correlation between thanksgiving, praise, and song. Psalm 95:1-2 says, “Come, let us shout joyfully to the Lord, shout triumphantly to the rock of our salvation! Let us enter His presence with thanksgiving; let us shout triumphantly to Him in song.”

Being thankful starts as an internal thing. We feel gratitude, but praise and singing is external. It is something others can see and hear from us. The Bible commands both—feel thankful and express that in praise and song to God and in the presence of others so that they can hear and be built up by it.

•       As an essential component to prayer as a whole (Col 4:2, Phil 4:6)

Colossians 4:2 says, “Devote yourselves to prayer; stay alert in it with thanksgiving.” So thanksgiving is an integral part of prayer, and it enhances every aspect of prayer, as well.

•       As an essential part of living the way God commands (Col 3:17, 2:7)

Colossians 2:7 says, “Therefore, as you have received Christ Jesus the Lord, walk in Him, rooted and built up in Him and established in the faith, just as you were taught, overflowing with gratitude.” Here we see again that when Paul wants to summarize the important keys to living as a believer, thankfulness is included.

•       What are some specifics we’re supposed to be thankful for?

o   Other people and their faith (Paul’s letters except for 2 Cor, Gal, 1 Tim, Titus [9 of 13])

At some point in 9 out of 13 of Paul’s letters, he tells the readers that he is thankful to God for them. He usually says something like “always, in every prayer of mine” and then lists the specific thing he’s thankful for right now about them. This is so powerful. Can you just imagine with me for a moment that every time you got a phone call from someone who is a mentor in your life, they started it off by telling you they’ve been thanking God for you on a regular basis and why? How encouraging that would be!

o   Our spiritual victory in Christ (1 Cor 15:57)

o   The gift of salvation (2 Cor 9:15)

o   God’s goodness (1 Chron 16:34)

o   The help God provides us in times of trouble (Psalm 28:7)

o   God’s righteousness (Psalm 7:17)

We’ve talked a little on here before about how it is possible to view things we might see at first as bad as blessings instead, but I think it’s worth touching on that again. As we’ve seen (and there are far more verses about thankfulness in the Bible that say this, too), God clearly tells us to be thankful and praise Him in everything. That means when you lose your job, when you can’t get pregnant, when your fiancée calls off the wedding, when you don’t have enough money for food, when your child dies, when the retirement fund vanishes, when there’s a national crisis, when someone you love turns their back on Jesus. In everything means in everything. It’s important to also note that the Bible doesn’t just talk about being thankful in the midst of hard things, it says to be thankful for hard things. How does that work??

When we can’t understand how it is possible to be thankful for hard things, we have to back up and evaluate our view of God. God created us “to the praise of the glory of His grace (Ephesians 1:6). So the first thing we need to remember is that we are not our own. We were not created simply to exist and be happy; we have a much greater, deeper purpose.

Ephesians 1:4-6 says, “For He chose us in Him, before the foundation of the world, to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love He predestined us to be adopted through Jesus Christ for Himself, according to His favor and will, to the praise of His glorious grace that He favored us with in the Beloved.” Here’s what most people don’t realize that this means: before time, before creation, before the world existed, perfect or broken, God decided to show the riches of his grace in saving us. That was the whole point of the world. That means that sin and death and brokenness were always part of the plan. God didn’t create the world perfect and then have to come up with a plan b) when Adam and Eve broke it with their sin. It was always the plan.

Now that may not sound encouraging to you at first, but let’s think a little deeper about it. That means that your sin or someone else’s sin that has affected your life so deeply was not an accident either. It didn’t catch God by surprise. He doesn’t have to rearrange any plans to fix it. He planned it, just like He planned Adam and Eve’s sin, to the praise of His glorious grace. That doesn’t let anyone off the hook for their sin. There is still moral responsibility to be taken for every wrong thing you and anyone else has done. But in the midst of that, God’s plan is not shaken. That’s the first truth that helps us to be thankful when hard things happen.

The second truth that helps with this is that of Romans 8:28, which says, “We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.” Now we know from experience that this “good” that God is using everything toward does not mean we will have just easy and happy things in our lives all the time. Life is hard, and Jesus Himself promised the disciples that they would have trouble in this life. That can leave us in a false dichotomy. We might think that if this is true, either God either isn’t capable to pull off what He claims or that His definition of our “good” is not actually good for us but only good for Him. I’ve been pulled into believing that last one at times. But like I said, this is a false dichotomy. God is both completely capable of pulling this off, and He really does mean our personal, best possible good.

How does that work?

So first of all, we have to recognize that in order for God to show His grace, sin, pain, sadness, and all the rest of the things that come with a fallen world are necessary. We can’t avoid that. However, God is incredible, and He has made a way in this mess for us to experience pain and suffering and for it to be good for us. That is because the best possible thing that can be true for us is to be in close relationship with God, delighting in Him, valuing Him above all else, and trusting Him completely. That is the best thing for us, and it is the place where we will be the happiest and most fulfilled, regardless of circumstances. That is God’s goal in our pain.

This is why it is often easier for those who experience hardship more often to truly trust God and delight in Him. There’s a reason God said it is easier for a camel to get through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter Heaven. When we have enough money to avoid suffering on the whole, there are fewer things to drive away from our sofas and to our knees. Obviously God has plenty of ways for even those with a lot of money to learn these same lessons. Anyone listening to this is almost certainly rich by global standards, and we’re learning. At the same time, I don’t know about you, but I can tell I’m learning very slowly sometimes, and it’s easy to forget again when life gets better.

This is why every hard thing in our life can be viewed—not just as a thing to be thankful around, but—as a thing to be thankful for, knowing that it is drawing us into a deeper, more joyful, and fulfilled relationship with Christ.

Now that we’ve looked at how and when we’re supposed to be thankful, let’s examine the differences between this facet of the Fruit of the Spirit and what the world can have.

Thankfulness or gratitude is first a feeling of appreciation and gratefulness and then, when truly full and completed, an outward expression of that feeling in some kind of praise or thank you. The world is capable of feeling this and expressing it. We only have to attend a concert to hear the appreciation or do something nice for someone and watch them glow. So what’s the difference? I think there are two.

First, non-believers cannot experience the fullness of thankfulness and praise because they do not recognize the ultimate source of the good thing they experience. Let’s think for a moment that you found out a friend of a friend did something incredibly nice for you. You don’t have the opportunity to tell them thank you yourself, so you ask your friend, who was involved but not responsible, to tell them on your behalf. It’s not the same, right? It’s similar with non-believers, even if they’re not always aware of it. Non-believers witnessing a spectacular sunrise or something similar might “thank the universe,” but something in them cries out that this is not enough.

The other difference I think exists is that for non-believers (and for us when we are not grounded in truth), thankfulness can be tainted. I think of Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory, who hates gift-giving because it’s a social contract. He says it’s not enough to simply be thankful for a gift, you have to repay it in equal measure. This takes to an extreme what a lot of people feel. Acts of kindness, gifts, etc. feel like work because now you owe the other person. The truth for us in Christ is that everything comes from God. God enables every person who gives us anything or does anything nice for us to be able to do it. He decides how much money each person makes and speaks by the Spirit to every believer. Because of this, we who are on the receiving end can be confident that we owe no one anything, and we owe God everything. This doesn’t change our life, because we are already living for God. The second thing this does is to help us recognize when we give that we are owed nothing, because what we gave came from God in the first place.

So how do we cultivate this facet of the Fruit of the Spirit? Practice, practice, practice. The more we are thankful, the more we will recognize things to be thankful for. The more we see things to be thankful for, the more we will give thanks. It’s a vicious circle that’s not really vicious but wonderful. Two years ago, I started this daily journaling thing. The first section is a place for thanksgiving. I write, “Father, thank You today for:” and then list three (sometimes more, but three is the minimum) things that I am thankful for. I try not to repeat things very often. Coffee is probably the most repeated thing, because I do it in the morning, and I almost always have my coffee handy, but I try not to use that more than once every month or two. Sometimes it’s hard to find three things to be thankful for. Some days I have four or five easily. But either way, it forces me to evaluate the previous day for the good things God is doing in my life and the good gifts He is giving me. I have definitely noticed a shift in my attitude since starting this, and I’m more apt to recognize things to be thankful for in the moment, too.

I encourage you to start something similar. I don’t think it matters when you do it or in what format, but take deliberate time each day to be conscious of the blessings God is bestowing—the ones that feel like blessings in the moment and the ones that don’t.

Another thing that can help cultivate thanksgiving is to keep a prayer journal. I have tried this a few times over the years and just started again today. The more we write down the things we are praying for, the more we can see when God answers them and thank Him for that.

What are you thankful for today? What ways have you grown habits of thankfulness in your own life? I’d love to hear about it on facebook or Instagram!

Thanks for listening to More than Milk. Visit my website at storiesbyhr.com for more great content and to see if I can help you tell your story better.

Everyone needs hope in order to live. When we don't have it, we give into despair. But what is it, and how do we get more of it? How is it tied to the Holy Spirit? Let's learn about it together on today's episode.

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk; I’m Hannah Rebekah. Today we are talking about hope, which is a little bit of a crazy story. If you’ve been a listener for a while, you know I haven’t released an episode since May. At the time, I was gearing up to run summer camp, and I knew there was no way to keep up with a podcast and run summer camp at the same time. My plan was to be back not long after summer camp ended. However, about the same time I was settling back into a post-summer rhythm, I was let go from my job because they could no longer afford to pay me, due to impacts from covid-19. Many of the things I had hoped for or hoped in shattered. New, desperate hopes took their place. “Please don’t make me temporarily move somewhere I don’t have a community already,” I prayed. “Please let me find another full-time job in Christian camping sooner than the almost three years it took me last time.” I moved this past Saturday back to a place where I have a strong community and at least a part-time job at a Christian camp. The following day at church, our pastor talked about hope and where it comes from and how to have more of it. When I opened my podcast document and read what I had promised the next episode would be about: hope. Then a couple days after I started working on this episode, a speaker at camp talked about the same thing! It’s like God knows what He’s doing and planned the whole thing.

As I have dived into the Bible to look up what hope is, I have found a few things. Let’s start with the original languages. In Hebrew, there are several words that are translated as “hope” in English. They fall into three categories of meaning: to wait for with expectation or confidence, to trust, and to find refuge. In Greek, there are only two words translated as “hope.” They both mean to expect, one specifically means to expect something pleasurable. If we were to take these definitions and combine them into one, all encompassing meaning, we could say that “hope” is an expectation that something good is going to happen in the future, and that gives us mental and emotional relief or refuge from the things happening between now and when that good thing happens. This idea that hope is a sustaining force is important. If I’m going through something difficult, so long as I have hope that something good will eventually happen, I can make it through the hard things.

This definition is a little different than in English but not completely. In English, there is room for hope to mean simply desire. When we say, “I hope it doesn’t rain today,” or “I hope I get that promotion,” we’re not expecting that this is the case, we are just saying that we want this to be the way things shape up. That’s not what the biblical meaning of hope is. To keep that straight, just think hope = expectation.

The opposite of hope is despair. If hope is the expectation of good things to come, despair is the expectation that only bad things will come. You could call it negative hope. Hope and despair can’t coexist. So long as there is some hope, some expectation that something good will happen sometime, there is not despair. As soon as that hope is snuffed out, though, despair takes over. Hope is sustaining, but despair kills.

Everyone can hope. You don’t have to be a Christian to have hope. All you need is an expectation of something. When I set out in the morning, I can hope (or expect) that it will be Michigan fall weather with a high of 65 degrees. I dress accordingly. However, my expectation can be wrong. I can hope in the wrong things, which leads to disappointment. Hoping in the wrong things happens for three reasons: 1) we have failed to do our research, 2) we have been deliberately misled, or 3) something unpredictable has happened. I’m sure we can think of examples of all three. I have failed to do my research on the weather many times. I expected that it would be sunny and dry, and it thunderstormed instead. I expect that it will be warm, and it is cold—or vice versa! Reason number two, that we have been misled, happens less often, at least for me, and it can be intentional or unintentional. Today at work, I was told that we were almost done, and the last two things I had to do were sweep and mop the kitchen. I hoped (or expected) that my work day was almost done and that as soon as I did those two things, I could leave. Partway through doing that, I was told that there was another thing to do. This crushed my hope and actually surprised me at how emotionally difficult it was to reorient my expectations with the new reality. The third reason, that something unpredictable has happened, we can see all the time! Someone hopes (or expects) to have an outdoor wedding, but it rains the day of. I plan to hang out with my friend, but then she comes down with a cold.

So if anyone can have hope, what is it that sets Christian hope aside? As we’ve been learning throughout our study of the Fruit of the Spirit, we have learned that there is always something extra for us as believers when it comes to these things, otherwise it wouldn’t be Fruit of the Spirit, it would be fruit of being human!

The difference between the hope we can have as believers and the hope that anyone else can have comes down to what our hope is in. If the core of hope is expectation, then we can have hope in things that are varying levels of certainty and importance. When I hope that the day is going to be good weather and dress accordingly, it is most likely not going to be life-altering if I have misplaced my hope and the weather is bad. On the other hand, if I entrust my life savings to a financial advisor, hoping or expecting that he will take care of it, and then he turns out to be a swindling crook, that matters a lot more.

When it comes to the Christian life, the thing that is the most important of all is also the thing we can be most sure of, and the Bible talks about it so much! When I search “hope” in my English bible, I come up with 130 matches! 71 of those, or more than half, are in the New Testament.

1 Peter 1:3 says, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.” We have been born again to a living expectation. We are not placing our hope in something dead or unsure. Jesus Christ is the living proof that our expectation is not in vain.

What is it that we are expecting? What are we hoping for? Romans 8:18-25 tells us, “18 For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. 19 For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. 20 For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope 21 that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. 22 For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. 23 And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. 24 For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? 25 But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.”

We are hoping for, expecting, looking forward to, and placing all our bets on the coming redemptions of our bodies, that one day the work of Christ will be completed in us and we will no longer be at war with the flesh but will be truly and fully holy as Jesus is holy. Whoo! What a day.

Colossians 1:27 say it this way—Paul is talking about his ministry to the Gentiles, and He says—"To them God chose to make known how great among the Gentiles are the riches of the glory of this mystery, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.” The presence of the Holy Spirit in our lives, Christ in us, is our living hope, the proof of our redemption and the seal that promises that one day we will be with God in glory, made new and free from sin.

Ephesians 1:11-14 says, “11 In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will, 12 so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory. 13 In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit, 14 who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.”

This is why our hope as Christians is different, at least when we put our hope in the right things. All other things that we can hope in have a possibility of failure. Every single other thing that we expect to happen might break down and cause us disappointment. But not Christ. Not the coming redemption. It is a sure thing.

What does this mean for us? If despair is the opposite of hope and we as believers have the ultimate source of hope, then despair is impossible for those who are in Christ. Now I know this is not a total reality. There are times when we experience some level of despair. Sometimes this is in part because of a chemical imbalance that we need help correcting. I am totally for medical intervention in such things. Much of the time, however, despair as a believer comes because we have lost sight of our ultimate hope. We have tried to put the weight of our expectations in something that cannot come through like we need it to. The cure for this is to reset our expectations, reevaluate what is most important in our lives, and refocus our eyes on Christ and His promises.

Romans 15:4 says, “For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.” Reading scripture gives us hope. Studying how God has come through on His promises in the past and familiarizing ourselves with His promises for the future reminds us where our confidence should lie and what we should be expecting.

Let’s remind ourselves of our definition of hope: an expectation that something good is going to happen in the future that gives us mental and emotional relief or refuge from the things happening between now and when that good thing happens. What other things do we put our hope in? Money is a big one. If I have a good job and I budget well, I can hope or expect that I will be able to save enough money to retire comfortably and not have to worry about taking care of myself when I am older. That is a secular hope. How about putting our hope in when the kids move out? When my kids are old enough to take care of themselves and they move out, I will be able to relax and have enough time to do what I love. That is a sustaining, secular hope.

But what happens when those things fall through? What happens when the stock market crashes or a huge, unexpected bill comes and your retirement fund is decimated? What happens when one of your children experiences a traumatic brain injury and you realize you will be caring for them the rest of their lives? When we put the weight of our hope into things that can shift and drop out beneath us, we put ourselves in the position to be emotionally devastated, to the point where it is very difficult or impossible to recover. On the other hand, if our main hope is in the fact that someday we will be present with the Lord, in new bodies, free from sin, and joyful forevermore, then nothing that happens in this world will knock us off our feet. That’s not to say that things can’t be hard. The point of a secure hope is that it helps us through hard things, because there is something better coming. But those hard things are like blips on the radar of eternity when we have our hope fixed in Christ.

Another thing I noticed about the right and wrong things we place our hope in is that it affects our interactions with other people. Having our hope in things that are temporary and earthly results in a hording mindset. For example, if we have our hope in money, we will be stingy with our giving, and we will take serious precautions against people stealing from us. On the flipside, the hope of believers is something to be shared. As our ultimate hope, Christ is big enough to hold the hope of us and everyone we know. We don’t have to keep Him a secret, lest too many people put their hope in Him and ruin it for the rest of us. Jesus is the hope that we can (and should!) share with everyone!

So where are you at today? If you have been disappointed by something you placed the weight of your expectations in, try today to refocus on God’s promises for the future. Do a study on what is waiting for you in Heaven and how God has promised to sustain and care for you between now and then. If you have your hope in that, share it with somebody! Believers and non-believers all need to know about or be reminded of the hope that we have and how it can never be shaken.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. I hope you’ll join me next time when we talk about thankfulness.

What things are we supposed to self-controlled from? How does that work? Does God really care about all the little details of our lives, or do we just have to follow Him the the big decisions?

Show Notes:

Today we’re finishing off the Fruit of the Spirit list in Galatians 5 with self-control. The Greek word is egkrateia, and it means “dominion within.” Self-control is the idea that nothing controls us but us. In the context of the Fruit of the Spirit, however, self-control would be better translated as “Spirit-controlled.” Egkrateia has more to do with the actions we don’t take than the actions we do take, but in every respect, we are to be controlled by the Spirit. Everything we do and don’t do should be because that is what God has asked of us.

The reason we need egkrateia in the first place is because of the indwelling sin nature we all still have. Because of Adam’s sin, we have all been born into sin and are bound for hell because of it. Jesus paid the penalty for our sin on the cross and also made it possible for us to have His righteousness. This doesn’t take away the sin nature we were born with, however. It only takes away our need to obey our sin nature. We no longer have to follow it. But the pull toward sin still exists. We can all feel it. The only way to do the right thing, to do anything other than sin, is by the power of the Holy Spirit.

The indwelling sin nature usually pulls us toward things that have an immediate reward but negative lasting effects. It takes lots of different forms, everything from eating sweets we don’t need and watching too much television to extramarital sex and murder. It’s easy to think that if we’re only doing the “little things,” it doesn’t really matter. It’s easy to think that God doesn’t have a plan for our lives in the tiny, mundane things but only in the larger “more important” things. We tell ourselves that when something big comes along, we’ll follow the Spirit and make the right choices. What I think we often forget is that there are two masters in this world that we can serve: God and everything that stands against Him—which is the world, the flesh, and the devil. Every single thing we do is for one side or the other. There is no middle ground, no action that is neither good nor bad. Your choice of how you spend every minute of your free time, every penny of your money, and every ounce of your strength is either good or bad.

I think if we really get this, it should terrify us. How can we possibly know whether what we’re doing is right or wrong when it comes to small things? How can we say ‘no’ to the things of this world when the desire can be overwhelming? It’s one thing to say ‘no’ to murder. It’s quite another to deny ourselves that last brownie or extra scoop of ice cream or TV show we like to binge. The answer is egkrateia, Spirit-control. The Holy Spirit lives in us. He is what changes us to be more like Christ. He is what gives us wisdom in our decisions, pricks our conscience, and gives us the strength to say no to sin and yes to righteousness.

We know non-believers don’t have self-control in the same way that believers can have it, but they do have some kind of self-control. What’s the difference? If non-believers are always fulfilling their own wants and desires, how is it that they can also say ‘no’ to their wants and desires? This is a very good question, and I think answering it will help to distinguish Spirit-control from self-control. Self-control is still always about what we want, but it values future gains over present ones. I want to have my weight under control. In order to do that, I have to eat well, exercise, etc. I also want to buy and eat that cheesecake in the store. Which want is greater? Which goal can I visualize more clearly in the moment? If the smoothness of the cheesecake in my mouth is a greater pull than being healthy, I’ll buy the cheesecake. On the other hand, if I can imagine all the benefits of being healthy—better sleep, less pain, more happiness, being comfortable in my own skin—and that outweighs the desire for cheesecake, then I won’t buy it.

Being able to visualize a later goal and put off gratification is all non-believers have for self-control, and they’re often not very good at it. This is more obvious, I think, in wealthier cultures. When our immediate needs are met without much struggle, we tend to use our spare time and money on things that are not at all good for us in the long run. There are so many books and other media about the value of visualizing a long term goal so that we can put off gratification for our own good, but it doesn’t sink in. Spirit-control gives us the extra edge we need. Not only do we have more power to fight the desire for instant gratification, we have a brighter, more solid “why” to look to. It’s not just what I want later versus what I want now, self fighting self. It’s what does God want versus what do I want now, flesh versus God. Without the Spirit, that battle would be hopeless, but now our transformed hearts want to do what God wants. Even better, anytime we do what God wants, we receive a burst of Spirit-enabled joy. This is a more powerful reward than the enjoyment we get from following the flesh into sin, which means we are reinforced to do the right thing.

So how do we cultivate this facet of fruit in our lives? You guessed it; step one is pray. When we lose sight of God and what He wants from us, the pull toward the flesh is overpowering and often even unnoticed in our lives because of its prevalence. In order to be woken from our mindless following the whims of the flesh, we need to pray for God to open our eyes to where we are not following Him. Maybe it’s the pull to waste time by checking your phone every five minutes or playing too many video games. Maybe it’s watching too much TV or not exercising. These things are not insignificant. If you weren’t wasting time every day doing things just to pass the time, what could you accomplish for the Kingdom? Who could you encourage? Who could you witness to or build up in the faith? What books could you write? What skills or hobbies could you use to bless others? We have been given such a blessing to live in a place where we don’t have to work every second of our lives just to feed and clothe ourselves, yet we waste so much of the extra time on things that will never last. Pray that God will open your eyes and give you the strength to resist the flesh and do the work He has set before you.

Step two is to look for opportunities. If we are Spirit-controlled against doing things that are worthless, there must be things we can do that are worthwhile. Look for those opportunities. Don’t just look for ways to amuse yourself or pass the time. Find fulfilling outlets for the creativity and skills God has given you. There is a place for rest and rejuvenation, but most of us spend doing things that are really worthless, myself included. These things don’t really recharge us efficiently, and they are not productive for the Kingdom.

A final thought on this before we close. The bigger God is in your mind—the more powerful, in control, and providential—the more likely you are to believe that the little things you do matter, for good for evil. If God is small in our minds, which is not remotely a true representation of Him, then it’s easy to believe that He just has grand, sweeping plans but not little details throughout the whole thing. It’s like the difference between two novels. One is extremely well written with intense foreshadowing and little connections you only see looking back. The other is simple and somewhat predictable. If we think of God as the author of the second, then the little details of our lives don’t matter. On the other hand, if we think of Him as the author of the first novel, then we will look for His hand in all things and expect what we do to matter in the grand scheme of things. God is the master storyteller. He can and does weave every little thing together. Only when we look back at the end of the story will we see how every little thing worked together to make the tapestry of history.

Believe that you matter. Believe that God is in control. Surrender yourself to Him in the big things and the little ones, and watch how He works through you.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. At the beginning of this series, we identified five things that are facets of the Fruit of the Spirit but are not mentioned in Galatians 5. We’re going to dive into those next time, starting with hope. I hope you’ll join me then.

Facets of Fruit: Gentleness

Gentleness is power with reserve. Find out why there's no weakness in Spirit-given gentleness and why and how you should practice this facet of fruit in your life.

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk; I’m Hannah Rebekah.

It’s been two weeks, and I’ve managed to produce a new podcast! Hooray for being productive and timely! Today we’re talking about the facet of the Fruit of the Spirit known as gentleness or meekness. The Greek word here is prautés, which means gentle strength or power with reserve and gentleness. I remember one year at summer camp a chapel speaker was talking through the beatitudes and called meekness “strength under control.”

I think it’s easy to equate meekness or gentleness with weakness, especially in certain contexts. But the heart of prautés is power, not weakness. It’s all about how you use that power than matters. When you’re handling a newborn baby, you use a lot of gentleness—not because you aren’t capable of more but because gentleness is what’s required. We would never think positively about someone who manhandles a baby just to show off how strong he is. At the same time, there’s something very touching about a man with bulging muscles holding a tiny child so tenderly—and no one would dare call him weak!

Handling babies is a good picture of what gentleness means, but it’s not the only place this facet of the Fruit of the Spirit is called for. In fact, we are always to have this quality. Anytime there is power to be had, it can be under control. We all know what the opposite of this looks like. It’s the proud and arrogant coworker who talks down to everyone and will do anything to get ahead. It’s the older sibling who uses their position to make their brother or sister work so they can do nothing. This “unnecessary roughness” is very common.

I used to do a positive peer, anti-bullying program at the local school with the staff of the camp I worked for. We would go into the middle school and work with the 5th, 6th, 7th, and 8th grades individually, for a half day each. Every year, we would ask the 7th graders how the 8th grade class had treated them, and every year, the answer was not great; they were abusing their power. We would also ask the 7th graders if they would break the cycle the next year. You could see the people who really thought hard about this, but there were always kids who yelled audibly that they were going to do the same things and enjoy being on top while they had the chance.

Breaking that cycle is difficult, because we’ve all been hurt. We’ve all had people who used their power to gain the upper hand, and we’ve all thought to ourselves at one point or another, ‘Wait until I am in that position; I’ll show them. No one will treat me like this anymore.’ And then when we do move up the ladder, to prove to ourselves and others that we are powerful, we do the very same behaviors that we used to hate.

To avoid this, we need meekness and gentleness. God has given all of us a measure of power, some greater and some lesser. He expects all of us to use that power not to build ourselves up and make ourselves look good but for the good of those around us. True gentleness can only come from the Holy Spirit because it requires that we first understand that God is taking care of us. Only then can we use the power He’s given us to better those around us. Philippians 2:3-4 says, “Do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves. Everyone should look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” That’s the heart of gentleness.

So how do we cultivate this facet of fruit in our lives? As always, step one is pray. We need the power of God to look outside of ourselves and see how we can use the power God has given us to benefit others. Step two is continually be growing in the knowledge of who you are in Christ. When we forget, even for a second, that we are loved, valued, and planned for by God, it is so easy to use the power God has given us to make ourselves look and feel good at the expense of others. If we are going to be gentle, we must remember that we are worth so much in God’s eyes, and we don’t have to prove that to anyone, including ourselves. Finally, we need to cultivate a Spirit of humility. As C.S. Lewis put it, gospel humility is not thinking less of ourselves but thinking of ourselves less. A humble and gentle spirit is aware of other people more than of itself.

So what does all this look like practically? In conversation, a gentle person looks for ways to make the other person feel known and heard instead of looking for opportunities to make themselves heard. This is a big one and a great first area to work on. Pay close attention to your thoughts and words when you’re talking to someone. Are you always looking for ways to interject your own life and thoughts into what the other person is saying, or are you really listening to and hearing the other person? Instead of trying to bring the conversation back to you, ask yourself what emotions are behind what the other person is saying. Is there something they’d like to say but are waiting to see if you care enough to hear it? If we’re always turning conversations back to ourselves, we will miss opportunities to love people, because they will be less likely to really open up about their needs.

This is not to say that we can never talk about ourselves or our own needs, but we have to balance it and be aware of why we’re talking about ourselves. Is it just to get noticed? To prove that we’re better at something? To point out that we have it worse? Those are selfish motivations. On the other hand, it is totally okay to let a close friend know that we’re struggling and need help with something. That’s not being needy or proud; it’s being real and honest the way the Body of Christ was designed to be.

So what else does gentleness look like? It means not looking for praise for yourself but looking for ways you can build up others around you. It means not grabbing at leadership opportunities so you can have the power but evaluating if you as the leader would be best for the whole team or if it would be better if someone else were. It means serving those under you, like Jesus washing the disciples feet.

Having power is not bad. Our positions of leadership and power over other people, whether it’s relational, positional, or whatever, comes from God. I don’t want you to come away from this thinking you can never be in a leadership role again because it’s wrong. If you are wired to be an effective leader, don’t shy away from that. But when you have power, use it well. Use it for the good of the whole and not just for yourself. Be the kind of person people want to follow, rather than the person they can’t wait to get out from underneath.

This is important even if you’re not a “leader,” because everyone has power somewhere. Whether you have a little or a lot, know your power and look for ways to use it well. Those who are responsible with little will be given more.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. I hope it will open your eyes to see where maybe you are misusing power and also to where you have some power that maybe you didn’t realize. I will see you again in two weeks when we talk about the facet of the Fruit of the Spirit called self-control. I hope you’ll join me then.

Facets of Fruit: Faith

Is it faithfulness or faith? Is there a differences? We'll do a little Greek study and then learn why this facet of the Fruit of the Spirit is more important than any other, how we can cultivate it in our lives, and how it's relevant to our world-wide situation today.

Show Notes:

Welcome back to More than Milk. I’m Hannah Rebekah. I started this episode back in the fall, but I had a serious case of writer’s block. I wrote about half the episode and just couldn’t get it finished. So I benched it for a few months. But now this pandemic has given me both the time and a little relevant material to finish it. I plan to get back on track and do an episode every other week or more. We’ll see how that goes!

As you may or may not remember, we were in the middle of a series on the Fruit of the Spirit. Today we’re looking at the facet of the Fruit of the Spirit known as faith or faithfulness. Here we have another translation oddity. This is not the normal Greek word translated as English ‘faithfulness.’ It’s the word most often translated as ‘faith.’ Even though faith is the English root word for faithfulness, they’ve come to mean very different things. Faith means having trust or belief, whereas faithfulness means being worthy of trust or belief. I think both could be listed with the Fruit of the Spirit, but only one of them actually is.

So what is faith? The Greek word is pistis, and it means to persuade or be persuaded. We know that biblical faith, like every other facet of the Fruit of the Spirit, is Holy Spirit given. So to have faith is to be persuaded by the Spirit that what God says is true and worthwhile. The result of having this facet of the fruit of the Spirit in its fullness would be a life lived the way God requires. Because like we talked about back in January, we always live what we believe. So if we are believing and being persuaded that God’s way is best, we will live like that is true. This would mean no fear, no battle with sin, no questioning if God really knows best, perfect contentment and joy, and so much more!

We will never achieve this facet of fruit in its fullness here on earth, which really is true of all of them. But when we understand what this facet means, perhaps it is more obvious here that we will always fall short than in other areas. To have perfect faith is to be perfect; every other facet of fruit falls under and flows out of this one. Faith is the first aspect of the fruit of the Spirit that we see in a believer’s life, because it is by Spirit-given faith that we are born again of the Spirit. But it doesn’t and shouldn’t stop there. We need this fruit at every step of our Christian life. Faith in God and His promises is what helps us conquer fear, overcome persistent sin issues, do things other people might think are crazy for the sake of the Kingdom, and so much more.

So if faith can only be given by the Spirit, what do non-believers have? Two things. First, they can believe things that are objectively provable. They believe in science and fact. But as we can also see with the spread of postmodernism, even that is a gift from God, though not one that is only for believers. Second, non-believers can have fanciful beliefs that can’t be proven, such as superstitions and other traditional, handed down beliefs. To a person without the Spirit, ‘faith’ is not needed to believe in facts; it’s for believing things that can’t be proven. This means it’s often not seen as a good thing, because believing things that can’t be proved can be seen as a little on the crazy side. That’s not to say, of course, that you can’t have people who have both scientific beliefs and unprovable beliefs. I dare say probably everyone does, though I’m sure many people would argue that they only believe things that can be proven.

We know, however, that real faith has little to do with whether or not something can be proved. Instead, it’s all about what God says. To have biblical faith is to know what God says, believe it, and live it out.

So how can we cultivate this facet of fruit in our lives? First of all, as always, is prayer. If faith comes from God, then if we want more of it, we should ask. Second, if faith is believing and doing what God says, then we can’t have faith if we don’t know what God says. We should be in the Word daily, reading with the intent to understand who God says He is, how He views the world, and what He wants from us.

Finally, we should give those around us permission to call us out on faithless actions. My greatest times of spiritual growth were when I was living and working with people who had permission to call me out when something I said or did was not based in truth. I had the same permission with them, and we made full use of the opportunity. Is it always easy? Certainly not. But it’s always worth it. Surround yourself with people who know the Word and will hold you accountable. This helps to both make the bible practical and to help you know it better.

If you’re wondering what faith might look like in the face of a world-wide pandemic, here’s a few thoughts. God has said He will never leave us or forsake us. He’s promised to work all things together for the good of those who love Him. He’s said He will not give us temptations greater than we can bear. He’s promised to supply ever need we have from His riches. He’s told us we can (and should) cast our cares on Him because He cares for us. He’s promised to hear us when we call on Him.

The life marked by faith believes these things and is affected to their very core by them. This person doesn’t hoard, doesn’t withhold good they could do, cares for others, is not afraid but instead trusts that God has a plan and is not caught off guard by anything that has happened. This person looks for opportunities to draw closer to God and serve others with His power and love in the midst of a crisis. This person doesn’t take advantage of situations or find loopholes in the rules and seeks to do what is best for everyone around them because they know God will care for them.

I hope this is you, and if it’s not, I hope you are praying for God to change you into this person. God does not withhold from us when we ask to be more like Him and how He has commanded us to be. These kinds of prayers are always inside His will, and He will always grant them.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. I am praying for all of you, that God will give you peace and that He will use this to bring about greater trust in Him. Lord willing, I will be with you again in a couple weeks to study the facet of fruit called gentleness. Hope you’ll join me then.

Facets of Fruit: Kindness & Goodness

Today we talk about two items on the Galatians 5 list of the Fruit of the Spirit: kindness and goodness. These two facets of fruit are eerily similar, and their Greek roots can both be translated as "goodness." We'll look at key differences.

Show Notes:

I’m back! I am planning to move to an every two weeks format for this podcast. With a full-time job, it is proving just too much work to put a new episode out every week. One of my favorite podcasters puts out a half hour long episode every week day, and I don’t know how he does it.

If you have been listening for a while, you know we are in the middle of a series on the fruits of the Spirit. We have already looked at love, joy, peace, and patience. Today we’re going to look at both kindness and goodness. I think you’ll understand why I decided to do both in one episode in a minute.

I started researching kindness and thought I knew what I was going to find. I was wrong. First of all, kindness is not a word used very frequently in the bible. A topical search revealed only a handful of English uses in the ESV. So I turned to the Greek. The Greek word translated as “kindness” or “gentleness” is chrēstotēs (khray-stot'-ace). It is used ten times in the NT, and it’s meaning is not at all what I expected. I was thinking maybe benevolence, gentleness, generous, thoughtful, etc. Nope. The top definition is “useful.” Next to that is “moral uprightness.” Hang on. Isn’t that what goodness is? So I looked that one up.

The Greek word translated into English “goodness” is agathosune (ag-ath-o-soo'-nay), which means “intrinsic goodness, especially as a personal quality, with stress on the kindly (rather than the righteous) side of goodness.” So basically I don’t understand why it’s not “goodness, kindness” instead of “kindness, goodness.” I’m betting the English words have evolved a little and it made more sense years ago. But anyway, let’s look at what they mean for our lives.

Chrēstotēs, the useful, moral uprightness, is used ten times in the NT and is translated as both goodness and kindness. It is used more often of the goodness of God but also a few times as a characteristic that we, as Holy Spirit indwelled people, should display. So as before, we see that this is a gift from God and not something that unbelievers can exhibit.

The key to chrēstotēs is goodness that is useful. Think James 2:14-17 “14 What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him? 15 If a brother or sister is poorly clothed and lacking in daily food, 16 and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and filled,” without giving them the things needed for the body, what good is that? 17 So also faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead.”

Chrēstotēs sees to needs. It is love in action. It does what is fitting and useful for a person at a given time, without cruelty. Without cruelty doesn’t mean it will always be enjoyable for the person being served. To speak truth into the life of someone who is not living in truth would be very in line with the heart of chrēstotēs.

Our society doesn’t have a category for this. In a postmodern age, to make a truth claim is to oppress. In the mind of our culture, it is impossible to correct without being cruel. We ought to know better. The trick for this is to follow Philippians 2:3-4 “Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” When we correct because we have to be right, we do it unkindly. We must convince the other person; they must see that we are superior; and if they feel bad about being wrong, that’s great. On the flip side, if we correct because we know that to know and live in the truth is the very best thing for that person (and for every person), we can be kind, gentle, sincere, and loving, with no need for validation for ourselves or humiliation for them.

What else does chrēstotēs look like? It is cleaning up after yourself so others don’t have to. It’s replacing the toilet paper roll instead of leaving it for the next person. It’s getting your friend a glass of water when they need it. It’s paying for the person behind you in line. It’s giving half your lunch to the coworker that forgot theirs. It’s changing dirty diapers. It’s making dinner for your family. It’s cleaning off your spouse’s windshield in the winter. It’s cleaning your house.

It doesn’t have to be anything big and extraordinary. It can be, certainly. I don’t want to discourage you from going to Goodwill, buying as many winter coats as you can afford, and donating them to a local shelter. That would surely be chrēstotēs. But large acts of goodness are built on a foundation of small acts of goodness. The more we do the little things all the time, the more our hearts change and want to be useful, want to see good done by the grace of God in the lives of those around us.

So that brings us to agathosune. This word is only used four times in the NT and nowhere that we know of in Greek literature. Of the four times it’s used in the NT, three are about us as believers being empowered to have this quality by the Holy Spirit, and one is about God Himself. Because there is so little usage, it is harder to come to a clear understanding of meaning, but here’s my best guess.

Have you ever met someone who you just know is a good person? Someone who is always kind, thinks the best of people, cares for others, stops to rescue turtles on the road, and is very cautious about saying anything bad about anyone? That’s the embodiment of agathosune. They’re so perfectly and wholly “good” that you can hardly imagine them doing anything like slamming a door out of anger or raising their voice. It’s not that they’re afraid of something or incapable of gathering that much strength of emotion. We all know those other types of people. It’s more that they have no reason to. They’re steady. Because of their confidence in Christ, they don’t take things personally. They have no need to show off or avenge themselves. They’re just “good.”

If a secular world can’t have agathosune, what do they have instead? Where do they fall short in trying to have this virtue of goodness? It’s a little bit similar to what we talked about earlier with chrēstotēs.  It’s in being so “good” that someone fails to stand up to evil. It’s just going along with whatever everyone wants, even if it’s not necessarily in everyone’s best interests.

My sister growing up was very, very kind and would do just about anything for anyone. My brother and I took advantage of this a bit. I remember when my parents would leave the house, my brother and I would watch Jeopardy, Family Feud, and The Price is Right, which we weren’t allowed to watch. We would set our sister as a lookout for our parents. She was happy to do it at first just because we wanted her to. After awhile she caught on a bit, and we had to bribe her with chocolate chips (another thing we weren’t supposed to have).

This kind of going along wherever and saying yes regardless of the consequences is where we and the world can go wrong. Instead, we should say yes when we can, doing whatever is in our power to be kind and generous with our time, words, and money, but we should do so with wise discernment. Our kindness and help should have the result of pointing everyone who sees it back to Christ.

Paul probably had this idea in mind when he wrote Romans 15:14, which says, “I myself am satisfied about you, my brothers, that you yourselves are full of goodness (agathosune), filled with all knowledge and able to instruct one another.” People acting out of this goodness don’t just point people to Christ by their actions but by their words, being deliberate to pass on the truth they know to others.

So to sum up, chrēstotēs can be summarized as useful goodness and agathosune as kindly wholesomeness. They are similar in that they are both often translated as “goodness” in the Bible but different in their specific meaning. How can we cultivate these two goodnesses in our lives? The biggest way is to pray that God would give us eyes to see people as valuable image-bearers of God at all times. The biggest unkindnesses happen because we think that we are of more value than those around us and are not conscious of the image of God in those around us. This is true of Hitler’s treatment of the Jews, our treatment of the Japanese, Africans, and Native Americans, general mistreatment of disabled and elderly people, abortion, and it’s true of when you and I don’t clean up after ourselves or say unkind words in anger. If we were to see every single person on the planet as intrinsically, equally, and incalculably valuable all the time, we would live out chrēstotēs and agathosune perfectly for the rest of our lives.

Of course that’s not going to happen, because we are forgetful. So we must regularly pray for such an ability and correct our mistakes when we make them—apologize, make right where possible, and pray for the strength to do better next time.

As always, after we pray for the eyes of God, we have to be ready to be the hands, feet, and lips of God. Look for opportunities to be usefully kind. Look for ways to say “yes” instead of “no.” And watch what happens to the people around you. God’s power at work always changes lives. It could just be yours, but I’m willing to bet the impact will be bigger than that.

Thanks for joining me on the podcast today. Next time we’re going to talk about the facet of the Fruit of the Spirit called faithfulness. I hope you’ll join me then.

This is my Sunday message from this past weekend where I spoke at a ladies retreat about the Faithfulness of God!

Show Notes:

How many of you feel stressed at some point on most days?

How many of you are afraid or worried at some point most days?

I am the oldest, and like many oldests, I am not a risk taker. I am very risk averse. Is it going to be dangerous? Let’s avoid it at all costs. Is it going to give me an adrenaline rush? That sounds terrible; why would I want that? I used to be afraid of so many things. (list) I felt like my whole life was lived in fear.

A few years ago, I learned some things that totally rocked my world. First of all, fear is wrong. It’s not just unhelpful or unhealthy. It’s morally wrong. It’s sin.

Isaiah 41:10 

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

2 Timothy 1:7 

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

1 John 4:18 

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.

Psalm 34:4 

I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears.

Psalm 23:1-6 

A Psalm of David. The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. ...

Proverbs 29:25 

The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is safe.

Joshua 1:9 

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Psalm 56:3-4 

When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust; I shall not be afraid. What can flesh do to me?

Philippians 4:6 

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.

There are over a hundred direct commands against fear in the Bible. (And by the way, stress and worry are just other forms of fear.) That’s a lot of verses! And that’s not even close to all the verses about fear. That’s just the direct commands. God takes fear very seriously, way more seriously than we do in our first-world culture. I think fear and gluttony are the two sins that Bible-believing, born again believer—in this country especially—practice without even realizing that what they’re doing is wrong. And we not only do it, we endorse fear. We grow it in our kids as we bubble wrap them and hand them a cell phone so we can always know where they are.

I think we dismiss fear as unimportant because we don’t understand how offensive it is to God. We think it’s just our problem, that it only affects us. But when we are afraid, we are saying to God, “I don’t trust You. You are not big enough to handle this.” And that’s offensive! Think about it like a child standing on the edge of a drop off. You’re standing there ready to catch them. You tell them to jump. But they shake their head ‘no.’ That hurts a little, right? Because you know that what they’re really saying is, “I don’t trust you. You might drop me.”

When things get out of our control, we become afraid, because we don’t trust that God’s control is bigger than ours.

Here’s how it works. Let’s say I’m walking through the woods at camp and there’s plenty of light outside. Even if I’m not trusting God, I’m not really afraid because I know these woods and because I can see anything that might be out there. If there’s a downed branch, I can go around it. If I see a skunk, I can avoid it. But what happens when the sun goes down? Suddenly I can’t see. Things are out of my control. Anything could happen. A tree could fall on me. A skunk could walk in front of me. I could get lost. A bear could eat me. Anything could happen!

But even though my control is gone, God’s isn’t. He has a plan for my life, and if getting eaten by a bear isn’t part of it, then it’s not going to happen. And if it is, then I’m okay with that. It’s a little harder to say that when it’s not something that results in death. Let’s me honest, I’d rather be eaten by a bear than sprayed by a skunk. One ends in seeing Jesus, the other ends in something of a living hell for awhile.

But let’s also be honest and ask, “When it was light out, did I really have that much control in the first place?” No, not really. But it was enough to keep me thinking that I could handle anything that came my way. It was enough to keep me trusting my own power and wisdom instead of God’s.

So why am I talking about fear when the topic this weekend is the faithfulness of God? I’m so glad you asked.

It’s because everything that we have been learning the last two days is the answer to our fears. God’s faithfulness is a beautiful truth, but if it doesn’t change us, it’s worthless to learn it—and honestly, we haven’t really learned it if it hasn’t changed us.

I think the biggest application of the faithfulness of God is that we don’t have to be afraid. We don’t have to worry. We don’t have to be stressed out. Because how many people really enjoy being worried or stressed? Nobody, right? We get over it because we think it’s necessary. I hear parents all the time say things like, “I’m your mom; it’s my job to worry about you.” And that sounds cute at first, but it’s really not true. It’s a mom’s job to care for and love her children, but worrying doesn’t have to be a part of that.

Can you imagine if God were to say the same thing? “I’m Your Heavenly Father; it’s my job to worry about you.” We would hate if He said that! Because it implies that He can’t handle anything that comes our way. Now, we can’t handle everything that comes our children’s way, which is why we worry, but we do know who can. And we can go to Him in faith and pray for our children. That is far more effective than any amount of worrying.

 But it’s not always that simple, right? Fear is sneaky, and we are forgetful, like I talked about last night. It’s hard for us to connect the truths that we learn to our everyday life. It’s like there’s a disconnect a lot of the time that we have to be deliberate in breaching. So I’m going to give you some tools.

First of all, we have to be on our guard against fear. If it’s wrong, we have to be willing to fight it, and we’re going to need God’s help, because this is not an easy battle. I believe fear is the number one weapon Satan uses against us. If he can keep us afraid, he can keep us quiet, unobtrusive. Those who are fearless are bold; they don’t care what may happen to their reputation, their bodies, their families—not because they don’t care about those things but because they see there is a God who is more important than those things.

Jesus said in Luke 14:26-33, “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple. 27 Whoever does not bear his own cross and come after me cannot be my disciple. 28 For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? 29 Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, 30 saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ 31 Or what king, going out to encounter another king in war, will not sit down first and deliberate whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? 32 And if not, while the other is yet a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks for terms of peace. 33 So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.”

He's not talking about actually hating, because in other places, the Bible says that if you say you love God and hate your brother, you’re a liar. Jesus is talking about priorities. If you can’t be willing to risk your family, your reputation, and your comfort for the sake of Him who called you out of darkness and into His glorious light, you can’t be His disciple.

So step one is pray. Be on your guard. Be watching for the signs of fear. Are you worried? Stressed about something? Are you being overprotective of something or someone?

If you find yourself acting out of fear, you need to figure out what it is you’re actually afraid of. Name it. This might be easy, or it might take a little work. In preparing for this weekend, I had to fight a little bit of stress about how long it was taking me to get my messages done. I was afraid that if I didn’t do well, I would never be asked to speak anywhere ever again. I was also afraid that if I asked for a little time off at work, my director would think I’m not really committed to this camp and make me feel bad about it.

Once you identify the fear, you have to figure out the lie that fear is built on. There were a few in there for me. First of all, I constantly have to fight the lie that my worth is based on what people think of me—specifically, I want to be known as someone who is wise and has a lot of biblical knowledge. So if I wasn’t prepared enough and bombed this weekend, you all would think I didn’t know what I was doing, and that would plummet my self-worth. That’s lie number one.

Another lie I was believing was that God can’t use things that go badly for good. If I put my best effort into preparing and it still went badly, there’s a reason for it (even if I didn’t put in my best effort, there’s still a reason, but the reason might be as simple as to teach me a lesson on working harder and starting earlier). If I fail, it doesn’t stop God’s plan from moving forward. And if He wants me to be a successful speaker and author, it’ll happen.

Another lie I was believing was that what my director thinks of me determines my value. Should I work hard at work and not ask for unnecessary time off? Absolutely. But if God has called me to something and I could use a little help with that, I shouldn’t be afraid to ask. If he had said ‘no,’ God would have provided.

Okay, so we identify the fear, then we figure out the lie(s). Next we figure out the truth. What are the truths that counter those lies I was believing?

The truth for the first and third ones are that God determines my value and worth not you or my director or anyone else. I am not worth more when my podcast gets more downloads. I am not worth less when someone reprimands me, whether that reprimand is legitimate and deserved or not. God says that I am made in His image, and I have been bought by the blood of Jesus. I am righteous, priceless, worth it.

The truth for the second lie, that my mistakes could somehow stop God’s plan, is that God is sovereign. He controls the past, present, and future. His will always comes about. I can’t mess it up.

The final step is to preach these truths to myself over and over until they sink and in make a difference in my head and heart. I forget. I know these things are true, and the more I tell myself them, the more they sink in and the longer I go before I forget them again, but I still forget. I still need to be reminded. So do you.

What are you afraid of? What are you telling God, “You’re not big enough to handle this,” about? He wants you to trust Him. He’s not mad at you for not trusting Him; He loves you and wants you to give Him your fears and anxieties. He is faithful. He will only ever do what is good for you. You can trust Him.

I encourage you as you go from here to tell someone the biggest fear you’re dealing with right now. I’m confident everyone has at least one. Tell each other the truths that combat those fears and stand with each other to remember those truths when it’s the hardest.

God…

• is all powerful
• knows all things
• is present everywhere
• is sovereign
• does not change
• is holy
• is just
• loves me

God…

• Finishes what He starts
• Keeps His promises
• Does not waver in His love for us
• Can be trusted
• Is the standard for faithfulness

Trust Him.

This is my Saturday message from this past weekend where I spoke at a ladies retreat about the Faithfulness of God!

Show Notes:

Story of ending up at Five Pines.

I tell you this story because it’s a perfect example of God’s faithfulness to me. He promised to lead and guide me. He promised to give me work to do that would use my skills and abilities for His glory and the building of His Kingdom. And He kept that promise, even if it wasn’t quite in my timeframe or exactly how I expected.

Yesterday we talked about the attributes of God that make it so that it’s possible for God to be faithful. Today we’re looking at the ways in which God is faithful. Last night I gave you a dictionary definition of what it means to be faithful. We’re going to look at how God fulfills every one of these points.

1. God finishes what He starts.

We can call think of times when God could have stopped halfway through something, moments when everything was on the line. Israelites about to cross the Red Sea, Egyptians behind them. Abraham about to sacrifice Isaac. Hananiah, Azariah, and Mishael in the fiery furnace. Can you imagine if God got distracted at those moments? If He had to take a call in the middle of one of those? The Egyptians destroy Israel, Isaac dies, Hananiah, Azariah, and Mishael burn. But that didn’t happen, because God is faithful. What He sets in motion, He finishes.

Philippians 1:3-6 3 I thank my God in all my remembrance of you, 4 always in every prayer of mine for you all making my prayer with joy, 5 because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now. 6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

God has started a good work in you. Though it may seem like it sometimes, He hasn’t gotten distracted. He didn’t have to take a call in the middle of your life. This is going somewhere.

1. God keeps His promises

God promised Abraham and Sarah a son and descendants as numerous as the sand and stars. God promised Rahab that she and her family would be saved when the Israelites invaded Jericho. God promised that Eve’s seed would crush the serpent. God promised the thief on the cross He would be with Him in paradise. God promised to work everything together for good for those who love Him. God keeps His promises.

1. God does not waver in His love for us

Adam and Eve brought sin into God’s perfect world. David had an affair, killed the man whose wife she was, and tried to hide the whole thing. Job complained. Gideon doubted. Elijah despaired. Paul battled sin. They all have at least two things in common: they all messed up and God continued to love and use them. To sin does not disqualify you from being loved and used by God; it qualifies you as human.

That’s not to say that we should sin. That’s the argument Paul combats in Romans 6. “Shall we continue in sin that grace may abound? Certainly not!” But we have to understand both the weight of sin and the glory of grace. Before we understand the gravity of our sin, we might wonder why God cares so much. What’s the big deal? It’s only a little sin. Then when we get the gravity of our sin, we might fall into thinking that God could never handle it. “My sin is too big, too ugly for God.” That’s when we have to understand the greatness of God’s grace. It’s only when we understand both that we can recognize that dealing with our ongoing sin issues should be a priority in our lives, but it will never ever keep us from God or from His love for us.

1. God can be trusted

Because of everything else we’ve seen yesterday and today, we know God can be trusted. He’s got this.

1. God is the standard for faithfulness

God is not just a faithful copy of something. He is the original. He sets the standard. He cannot falter or be imperfect.

What does this mean? Let’s sum up the ways God is faithful.

The faithfulness of God means that God will always do for us what is for our good, regardless of our own successes or failures.

But hang on! We can all think of times when things happen to believers that we wouldn’t define as “good.” So either God really isn’t faithful, or there’s something wrong with our definition of “good.”

A lot of people will solve this by saying that God is faithful, but His power is limited. He wants what’s best for us, but He’s given us free will, so He’s walled Himself off from helping us when we make bad choices. There’s two problems with that: that would mean that those who follow God well only have good things happen to them (which we know isn’t true) and we saw yesterday that God is in control of even our thoughts and desires. There’s no way that giving us choices ties His hands.

So what does it mean, then? How does God define “good”?

There are two sides to each of us, the spiritual and the temporal. Both sides need things to be healthy. The temporal needs food, water, sleep, shelter, health, love, and purpose. The spiritual needs a right relationship with Christ.

Which one do you think is more important? If we neglect our spiritual side but take care of our temporal side, is that better or worse than if we care for our spiritual side but neglect our temporal side?

The spiritual side is more important, right? Obviously they’re both important, and God tells us to care for our bodies, but what happens when these two good things come into conflict? What happens when to give us “good” in the temporal is to cause harm to our spiritual health?

I’m sure you can all think of someone who has everything they could ever want temporally and has no idea how dead and in trouble they are spiritually. I’m willing to bet you can also think of those who have had things we need to be temporally healthy taken away from them and are more spiritually healthy because of it.

God knows what we need and how we need it. He knows that the highest good for our lives is to have a thriving personal relationship with Him that overflows into all our interactions with others.

He also knows that comfort creates entitlement, pride, and ingratitude, which are poison to our relationship with God.

When God promises to work all things together for the good of those who love Him, He’s promising to give you just enough of the things you need to physically survive and not so many that you forget that you need Him.

As I was going through this process of figuring out what I was supposed to do with my life and then trying to find a place to do it, I learned something about the way God directs us.

How many of you use Google Maps? I think there are two kinds of people when it comes to using Google Maps. There are those who look up their destination, punch go, and just do what it tells them to. And then there are those who need to know the route, need to see each upcoming turn. That’s me. I don’t just want you to tell me to turn right, I need to know what the name of the road is that I’m turning onto, how long I’ll be on it, and what the name of the next road is.

And then there are those of you that don’t fit into either of those categories. You get in the car and head in the general direction of your destination and hope you find it. You people scare me.

God gives us directions in small steps. He usually doesn’t tell us exactly where we’re going or how long we’ll be where we are. Sometimes He’ll say “head east,” and we can guess where we might be going, but more often than not, He says “turn right” before we get there, and we end up heading in another direction.

He does it this way to keep us humble. If we knew where we were going every step of the way, we could easily say, “Thanks God, I’ve got it from here.” The same is true for all the other ways that God takes care of us. We tend to think that in order for God to be faithful, He has to keep us healthy, make us rich, give us a great husband, obedient kids, and wonderful friends. But when we think that, we’re only thinking about the temporal side of things, and we’re not really believing that the spiritual side is more important than the temporal side.

If God really is all of these things that we talked about last night, if He really does know best and has promised to do what is the very best for us, then we have to trust Him. We have to believe Him when he says, “I’ve got this. Even if you can’t see the end. Even if you can’t see where this is going or how all the threads are possibly going to tie together. I’ve got this. Trust me. Follow me.”

In 1990, Robertson McQuilken resigned his position as the president of Columbia Bible College. Since he had taken the position, enrollment had doubled and two radio stations had been founded. So why did he resign? His wife, Muriel, had contracted early onset Alzheimer’s and had progressed in the disease to the point where she was terrified if he wasn’t with her. So he left his job at the peak of his career to care for her.

He said, “When the time came, the decision was firm. It took no great calculation. It was a matter of integrity. Had I not promised, 42 years before, ‘in sickness and in health . . . till death do us part’?

“This was no grim duty to which I stoically resigned, however. It was only fair. She had, after all, cared for me for almost four decades with marvelous devotion; now it was my turn. And such a partner she was! If I took care of her for 40 years, I would never be out of her debt.”

Though some of his friends and colleagues urged him to put her into a home, he cared for her until the very end, cleaning up after her, cutting up her food, taking her out into the sun. There was nothing that she could then do for him. There was no way she could keep her marriage vows to him in her condition.

When I heard that story, I couldn’t help but think that it was a glimpse of God’s faithfulness to us. Only God’s faithfulness goes much farther. He didn’t fall in love with us because we were beautiful and then stick with us when things got hard. He chose us when we were still sinners. He saw us mired in the muck of our own mess and said, “She’s mine.”

He cleaned us up and brought us to the table of His Father, gave us a place at His right hand. Calls us His bride, coheirs with Christ. He gave us His righteousness and His Holy Spirit and a purpose for our lives. But we’re still helpless without Him. We still forget over and over, like an Alzheimer’s patient, how amazing and beautiful He is. We forget that to walk with Him is the most fulfilling adventure the world will ever know, and we try to go back and play in the mud He found us in.

But that doesn’t change His love for us. He said, “She’s mine,” and He meant it. He didn’t shed His blood and call us to Himself and fill us with the Holy Spirit to change His mind. He doesn’t change His mind; we learned that yesterday.

So what can we do to help ourselves remember? We can stack stones.

Joshua 6:1-9 When all the nation had finished passing over the Jordan, the Lord said to Joshua, 2 “Take twelve men from the people, from each tribe a man, 3 and command them, saying, ‘Take twelve stones from here out of the midst of the Jordan, from the very place where the priests' feet stood firmly, and bring them over with you and lay them down in the place where you lodge tonight.’” 4 Then Joshua called the twelve men from the people of Israel, whom he had appointed, a man from each tribe. 5 And Joshua said to them, “Pass on before the ark of the Lord your God into the midst of the Jordan, and take up each of you a stone upon his shoulder, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, 6 that this may be a sign among you. When your children ask in time to come, ‘What do those stones mean to you?’ 7 then you shall tell them that the waters of the Jordan were cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it passed over the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. So these stones shall be to the people of Israel a memorial forever.”

8 And the people of Israel did just as Joshua commanded and took up twelve stones out of the midst of the Jordan, according to the number of the tribes of the people of Israel, just as the Lord told Joshua. And they carried them over with them to the place where they lodged and laid them down there. 9 And Joshua set up twelve stones in the midst of the Jordan, in the place where the feet of the priests bearing the ark of the covenant had stood; and they are there to this day.

God had the Israelites do a lot of things that were strictly to help them remember Him and His promises, and building this structure of 12 stones was one of them. What are your stones? What’s helping you remember the promises God has kept and His blessings to you? I keep a small journal every day, and one of the things I write every day is three things I’m thankful for. There’s a few other things on the page, but at the bottom, I sign my name “Your beloved, Hannah.”

These words keep at the front of my mind who God says that I am and remind me of blessings that He’s given me in the last 24 hours. It’s a stack of stones. I hope one day, if God blesses me with children and grandchildren, that I can open up those little journals and show them all the things God has done for me, big and small.

Today I encourage you to figure out something you can add to your life that will be a reminder. Maybe you need to buy a painting or print that reminds you of a way that God is faithful that you struggle to remember. At every season of my life, I have drawn on construction paper some words and pictures to remind me of a truth that I needed in that season. Maybe you need to keep a daily journal of thankfulness. Pray about it. Come out with a practical option.

The other thing I want to encourage you to do is to tell stories to each other. As you go through this weekend, talk to one another about the things you’re struggling with and how you are seeing God’s faithfulness through it. If you can’t see God’s faithfulness in your situation, listen to others. Beg them for stories of them own to help you. Share this truth with one another.

God is faithful.