Mother Plus Podcast

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ADHD, high functioning anxiety and perfectionist-based procrastination go together like peanut butter, jelly and banana. 

We’re former hard-working, top-of our class, good girls who masked our high functioning anxiety our whole lives, and then we became mothers, and the masks are falling apart. They are WORN OUT. And we just can’t keep them together anymore.

Today, I’m going to share a story with you about motherhood and anxiety so you can KNOW for sure that there are others out there like you. You’re not alone. And either am I.

 “My other daughter” was originally read on stage at The Boulder Theater for the national show, Listen To Your Mother.

Former Chicago-girl, Stacey Hutson, now lives  in Golden with her husband and two still slightly helpless daughters, ages 4 and 6. Stacey wanted to be a mom her whole life. Which is why she was so confused when motherhood was not the rainbows and sunshine she always imagined it would be. Her nervous system was overwhelmed, her house was a disaster, and she couldn’t understand why she was so nostalgic for her fun, spontaneous pre-mom life. That’s why she created the Mother Plus Podcast with Stephanie Sprenger to give a voice to the too much moms who feel like they are failing at motherhood, and don’t want to fail anymore. Stacey discovered LTYM five years ago when she needed it most. She made a promise to herself that night that she would one day be in the show. Four shows later, she has been here every year, pinching herself, alongside the most incredible cast of women.

If you're looking for your people -- the ones who get your time blindness, always-late-ness,  obsessive, excited, but easily distracted nature -- then please join us in the ADHD Moms Club.

This THURSDAY, May 23rd, we'll be having our first virtual Body Doubling Meetup. Bring your laundry, bring your bills, bring your kids. It's super casual. The idea is that we will accomplish much more together than apart.

Again, click here to join for free and attend: https://www.motherplusser.com/offers/vuz3iqfT/checkout

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

1. Steph reviews the new Taylor Swift album, The Tortured Poets Department. 
2. But this episode isn't really about music or being a Swiftie—it's about women's voices, rage, community, and connection. 
3. Steph had a few viral posts that brought up a LOT of issues—namely, why do women sometimes tear each other down? 
4. We talk about the "therapy" of Taylor Swift music, from eras of our lives, versions of ourselves, and playlists of grief and loss. 

And now a few invitations to join us in communities of strong, supportive, authentic women:

To FINALLY find "your people" in a community of women that will not judge all your "shortcomings" because they have the same ones, Join the ADHD Moms Club Here!

And...

Steph is facilitating a creative writing workshop for ALL levels (read: "not real writers" are welcome!) based on Taylor Swift song lyrics + our own stories. It's starting May 29th, and it's going to be GOOD! Join here.

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

1. I used to be fun—what happened?" In this Stace and Steph episode, we explore what happens when an ADHD mom feels like she lost her fun. 
2. ADHD women are before we had kids—we want to reclaim some of the fun of our 20s and 30s that we lost. 
3. We all go through an inevitable unwilding and rewilding of ourselves, and as a mom of older kids, Steph gives us a glimpse of how much fun it can be on the "other side."
4. We break down exactly why motherhood with ADHD can be such a challenge and sap us of our fun: the transition to extra responsibility is extra hard on ADHD women. 
5. Masking for ADHD women is rough—acting busy, performing, being a Good Girl—but taking the mask off is rough too and can be a recipe for a breakdown. Neither are fun. 
6. How can you be the "fun mom" when you're the "bitchy, unhinged mom?" You can't. Getting a handle on your ADHD brain and understanding the way you operate is essential for feeling better, calmer, and more fun. 
7. Here is our game plan for getting your fun back: doing "the work" with therapy or meds, finding alone time, connecting with your partner, and seeking out the people who make you feel like you. 

Let's continue the conversation in the ADHD Moms Club. To sign up, click here:

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

Guess what? We found a professional organizer who has ADHD. This episode is all about how to actually get our homes -- and our lives -- in a place that makes our minds feel more at peace. But we're not doing it with the typical organizing advice. Because, as you likely already know, that doesn't work for the ADHD brain.

Today, Esmeralda Simonelli, Steph, and Stace cover all things organizing and decluttering our way.

Here's the Cliff's Notes:

• Newly diagnosed Esmeralda tells her diagnosis story and how it explained a lot about her dating patterns
• A woman with ADHD is much better equipped to help a woman with ADHD organize
• Esmerelda breaks down how to clean a playroom — a technique you can apply to any room
• She also breaks down how to clean a car for the ADHD brain (you’ll love her trick)
• Her #1 trick for keeping your home clutter-free
• The importance of involving your kids in the clean up (yes, even — and especially for — ADHD kids)
• The role emotion plays in decluttering
• How decision paralysis effects women with ADHD

Esmeralda Simonelli is a professional organizer + decluttering expert that specializes in ADHD. Pulling from her career as an occupational therapist, she has been able to help over 95 clients organize their homes and improve their mental health through her unique systems.

As a single mom of three children, 15, 11, 4, with her youngest daughter being autistic, she knows the struggles (and utter chaos) of managing a household. She offers in-home organizing to the Florida area, as well as virtual services to those out of state.

She is offering her virtual organizing session for just $50 per hour (typically $75) until the end of May to the Mother Plus listeners.

To find Esmeralda, visit her website:
https://getneatnow.com/

To find your people, join the ADHD Moms Club here (just in time for our ADHD Virtual Welcome Party on May 9th):
https://www.motherplusser.com/offers/vuz3iqfT/checkout

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

When you’re a mom, and you surround yourselves with moms telling their motherhood stories, baring their souls, laughing, crying, and being brutally honest, it is a powerful thing. 

Listen To Your Mother is a national series of live storytelling shows where local writers share their original pieces about motherhood. And today, Steph brings you the piece she read at last year's show.

The story is called “Heartbreak And The Young Entrepreneur.” It’s all about her young daughter’s entrepreneurial efforts, and the disappointment that comes with them. Hard for her daughter, but even harder for mommy to watch. As Steph says,

"I am unable to watch my child descend into perceived worthlessness without desperately trying to convince her of her excellence."

Tune in for a short but powerful piece that will have you thinking about how you want to empower your own daughter or son.

Listen To Your Mother will be this Saturday, May 4th at the Boulder Theater.

Click here to get your tickets: https://www.z2ent.com/events/detail/listen-to-your-mother-2024

And if you’re looking for a place where you can feel seen, heard, and understood by other ADHD Moms like you, click here to join our club: https://www.motherplusser.com/ADHD-mom-club-waitlist

About Stephanie:
Stephanie Spregner is a writer, producer of live storytelling shows, podcaster, editor and facilitator of a writing community for midlife women, and proud curator and promoter of women’s creativity, regardless of their life stage, talent, and experience. One of her primary goals in life is to help guide women back to themselves, reclaim their fire, and boldly use their voices. 

Her work has been published in O Magazine, The Washington Post, Brain, Child Magazine, Motherwell, Mutha Magazine, The Bellaadonna Comedy, The Huffington Post, Scary Mommy, Cosmopolitan.com, Redbook.com, The Chicken Soup for the Soul Series, and more.

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

We begin part two with this doozy: Tracy Otsuka shares that she never struggled with motherhood. 

Why? Her husband served as her executive functioning, and they split tasks based on what they were both good at. Revolutionary, huh? 

In this episode...

1. Tracy gives us the most beautiful reality check about what it really means to be a "good mom." It's about emotional connection, not the "administrative crap."
2. "What happens to women with ADHD is that they feel they cannot be who they truly are." Tracy's goal is to help women be more of who they really are, not less.
3. Main character mom goals: Tracy's parenting goal was that her kids grow up to be proud of her. She reminds us how important it is that we "show our daughters what it looks like to be ourselves."
4. "You wouldn't call it people pleasing if you really wanted to do it." We discuss how people pleasing shows up in ADHD motherhood. Tracy talks about using positive and negative emotions a barometer to recognize when we are doing things for the right reasons. 
5.  Tracy reminds us of the power and importance of gratitude for ADHD women, especially as a tool to combat the negativity and worry when we are stuck in default mode network (DMN). 

ABOUT TRACY OTSUKA
Tracy Otsuka, JD, is a certified ADHD coach and the host of the ADHD for Smart Ass Women podcast. Over the past decade, she has empowered thousands of clients (from doctors and therapists to C-suite executives and entrepreneurs) to see their neurodivergence as a strength–not a weakness. Tracy leverages her analytical skills from being a lead counsel at the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission to identify the right questions to ask her clients so they can boost their productivity, improve their finances, save failing relationships and live happier lives.

Tracy’s expertise and experience as an adult living with ADHD are regularly sought out by top tier media including Inc, Forbes, ADDitude magazine, and The Goal Digger Podcast.  She hosts her own podcast which ranks #1 in its category and has over 5 million downloads across 160 countries. She also moderates a Facebook group with nearly 100,000 members. A married mother of two, Tracy lives in Sonoma County outside of San Francisco.

Tracy's website: https://www.tracyotsuka.com/
Tracy's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/adhd-for-smart-ass-women-with-tracy-otsuka/id1443678424
Tracy's instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka/?hl=en

If you are nodding your head to everything in this episode, and you've been looking for your people and feel like you've FINALLY found them, please join us in the ADHD Mom Club. We cannot wait to see you there:
https://www.motherplusser.com/ADHD-mom-club-waitlist

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

Organization Graveyard:
The place where all the organizational tools you buy from Amazon, Target, and The Container Store go to die.  They are unwrapped, unused, and riddled with guilt, a constant reminder that you are a spacey, unorganized ADHD mom.

Not. Anymore.

Stacey takes you through -- step by step -- how to actually tackle the graveyard. How to go through all the items, open them up, and actually use them.

Yes, it's simple. But it's not easy. But as you'll learn, half the battle is starting.

Pop your air pods in and tackle your "graveyard" with Stacey. You won't believe how good you'll feel afterwards.

To tackle more tedious boring life tasks with Stace and Steph on a regular basis, join the ADHD Moms club. We cannot wait to see you there!
https://www.motherplusser.com/ADHD-mom-club-waitlist

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

In Part I of our conversation with the incomparable Tracy Otsuka, we share the story of how we came to find her, and introduce her podcast and incredible book to our listeners. We discuss Tracy's superpowers as a woman with ADHD, and how her story may be unlike other ADHD women because of her confidence and comfort level with being "different."

The Cliff's Notes Version:

1. Tracy shares something that sets her apart from other ADHD women—she has never cared that she is different, and has used that to her advantage. 
2. Women with undiagnosed ADHD may mask, compensate, and craft harmful narratives like, "I guess I'm not that smart" or "I have no idea what's going on." 
3. Tracy breaks down hyperactive and inattentive type ADHD and how they affect confidence and learned helplessness.
4. We dive into why motherhood can be more difficult for women with ADHD—our daily routines feel like Groundhog's Day, the tasks required can be boring for our creative brains, and the compromised Executive Functioning skills create overwhelm. 
5. Tracy breaks down DMN (default mode network) and TPN (task positive network), and explains how the challenge toggling between them makes transitions more difficult for ADHD women. 
6. We learn some strategies to manage our DMN and TPN and how to work with our brains, taking charge and learning to switch gears. 

ABOUT TRACY OTSUKA
Tracy Otsuka, JD, is a certified ADHD coach and the host of the ADHD for Smart Ass Women podcast. Over the past decade, she has empowered thousands of clients (from doctors and therapists to C-suite executives and entrepreneurs) to see their neurodivergence as a strength–not a weakness. Tracy leverages her analytical skills from being a lead counsel at the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission to identify the right questions to ask her clients so they can boost their productivity, improve their finances, save failing relationships and live happier lives.

Tracy’s expertise and experience as an adult living with ADHD are regularly sought out by top tier media including Inc, Forbes, ADDitude magazine, and The Goal Digger Podcast.  She hosts her own podcast which ranks #1 in its category and has over 5 million downloads across 160 countries. She also moderates a Facebook group with nearly 100,000 members. A married mother of two, Tracy lives in Sonoma County outside of San Francisco.

Tracy's website: https://www.tracyotsuka.com/
Tracy's podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/adhd-for-smart-ass-women-with-tracy-otsuka/id1443678424
Tracy's instagram:  https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka/?hl=en

If you are nodding your head to everything in this episode, and you've been looking for your people and feel like you've FINALLY found them, please join us in the ADHD Mom Club. We cannot wait to see you there:
https://www.motherplusser.com/ADHD-mom-club-waitlist

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

This Tedious Task of the Week is putting the laundry away—we hate doing this! Steph shares her step-by-step guide to pouring out the laundry basket, sorting the clothes, and getting it put away in a less soul-crushing way. We are all about making dreaded household care tasks less painful, so let's tackle it together! 

Here's the Cliff's Notes:

1. Steph shares how Stacey's "love letters to yourself" bonus episode last week impacted her and inspired her to set out her yoga stuff the night before. 
2. Remember why we do the tedious task of the week together? It's not to shame ourselves into being "better" at chores, but to give ourselves love letters to our future selves by making our lives easier and not procrastinating. 
3. This week's Tedious Task: Putting the laundry away. Not washing it or switching it or even folding it—JUST putting it away. 
4. Putting the laundry away is often the step that ADHD women hate the most and put off, causing us to live out of our laundry baskets. 
5. Steph shares her step-by-step system for dumping the laundry out of the basket and getting every single item put away where it belongs. 
6. Strategies like engaging your senses, body doubling, and tuning into what feels most motivating to you will help you be more successful. 

Sign up for our ADHD Moms Club here. Free community for moms with ADHD coming at the end of this month—get on the waitlist to join a group of women who get you and can celebrate your successes, understand your stresses, and share resources. 

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger

Send us Fan Mail

Did you ever imagine a day where you could go to your therapist office, and pull out the tarot cards?  Today, we’re talking to holistic therapist, yogi, meditation teacher and author, Chris McDonald. "Tarot friendly" is literally on her about page. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't take her seriously. 

By the end of today’s episode, you will understand how therapy and spirituality can work together, and most importantly, how that can help women with ADHD.

We're going to cover:

1. Spirituality means something different to everybody, and Chris talks about the value of bringing body/mind/spirit integration into her work and how it can benefit women with ADHD. 
2. Bringing the body into therapy through yoga and somatic work can help women with ADHD who have struggled to get out of their heads and into their bodies. 
3. Chris explains the concept of a "window of tolerance" and how she helps her clients by giving them tools to be less reactive when stressors arise. 
4. We learn about the importance of self-compassion for the ADHD mom, and Chris walks us through a "compassion break."
5. Spiritual practices can help women with ADHD shift their perspective as well as find community. 
6. SLOW DOWN is our new mantra. Instead of "What's the most I can do?" ask yourself "What's the least I can do?" during stressful moments: nervous system regulation is extremely important for ADHD moms. 
7. Chris talks about meds, finding tools and strategies that fit, and how to go about finding a therapist who is a good fit for you. 

In today's episode, we meet Chris McDonald, who introduces us to the world of holistic therapy and explains to us how her practice is different from other mental health therapists. Chris teaches the importance of power of incorporating body, mind, and spirit into sessions. She incorporates emotional work plus the practical problem solving and executive functioning tasks like time management and organization. We discuss Chris's take on experimenting to find what works for you, in terms of medication and strategies for ADHD management.

For Chris's self-compassion steps, email [email protected] and we'll send them right to you :)

To find your people and a place to be yourself, join the ADHD Moms Club, click here:
https://www.motherplusser.com/ADHD-mom-club-waitlist

Chris's website:
https://pathtohopecounseling.com/

Chris's instagram:
https://www.instagram.com/path2hoperaleigh/

WHERE TO FIND US NOW

Connect with Stacey

• 🎧 The Next Phase Podcast —  
• on Apple & Spotify 
• 📸 Instagram: @stacehutson

Connect with Steph

• 🎧 The Peri-Normal Podcast
  on Apple and Spotify
• ✍️ The Reclamation Era
  on Substack
• 📝 MidCircle
  — a writing community for midlife women
• 📸 Instagram: @stephsprenger