As I bring you this episode, we are less than two weeks from the 2024 U.S. Election. In preparation for this moment, I seized the opportunity to sit down with Melissa Walker, a children's book author turned powerful political advocate, instrumental in the founding of an organization called The States Project. 

Melissa’s path to The States Project was paved in the election results of 2016 which, like it did for so many of us, became a catalyst for activism. Looking for a way to get more intimately involved in our democratic process, her journey took a powerful turn when she attended a holiday party where then New York state senator Daniel Squadron, opened her eyes to the influence of state governments. She learned that issues—like education, healthcare, civil rights, and voting rights—are often decided in state capitals, not Washington, D.C. This spark led her to gather other mothers and children's book authors in her own living room to create what they called a States Project Giving Circle. That group went on to help flip legislative seats in Virginia in 2017, impacting the balance of power enough in that state that they expanded healthcare for 400,000 Virginians that year. Fast forward to 2024 and the States Project Giving Circles grow to over 200 across the country while my Mom Fran and I were searching for how we could transform our anxiety and fear to make an impact in this year’s election. The answer came from my niece Nicole, whose work with The States Project inspired us to start our own Giving Circle, which we named “Generations” for the three generations of women we sought to engage. It was also Nicole who invited Melissa to join our Circle on Zoom, where Melissa helped us make a strategic decision to pick Pennsylvania to direct our funds. 

This episode is the invitation we ALL need right now—to look beyond the obvious and consider how strategic political giving in key states can create profound ripple effects across the country. Melissa helps us realize that by coming together with shared values and a sense of purpose, we can light the way for change. In these critical weeks before the 2024 U.S. election, I hope Melissa’s E.P.I.C. life journey and her wisdom inspire all of us to use our power to make a difference—and to bring someone else along. Whether you join our Giving Circle or decide to come together with a community of your own, this episode reminds us that we have agency…and that collective, strategic action, even in small steps, can shift the course of our democracy.

Join Us in Our “Generations” States Project Giving Circle!

As mothers and daughters... we know that the stakes in this election couldn’t be higher for ourselves and future generations. Many of us are feeling a deep desire to make a meaningful impact but are unsure how best to channel our resources.

That’s why we’ve come together to form a States Project Giving Circle focusing on a powerful and often overlooked area of change—state legislatures.

In collaboration with The States Project, we are uniting across generations—mothers, daughters, family, and friends—to drive transformative change at the state level. State legislatures play a critical role in shaping policies that affect our daily lives, from education and healthcare to voting rights and environmental protection. Yet, they often receive far less attention and funding than national races.

Our Circle selected the state of PA and we are almost at our goal. Help us cross the finish line! Learn how you can make an impact by clicking HERE

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• Melissa's journey into political engagement post-2016 election and her quest to help people look beyond the first glance to engage strategically and purposefully. 

• How Melissa balances the “doer” qualities of her mother alongside the “thinker” qualities of her father.  

• The holiday party with then New York State Senator Daniel Squadron that became the “spark moment” that helped Melissa realize the power of state legislatures. 

• Melissa’s leadership in the formation and expansion of States Project Giving Circles to promote collective political giving and community engagement.

• Why a few states like Pennsylvania, the one we selected for our Generations Giving Circle, can also impact the presidential election. 

• Melissa’s two daughters, and how they have become advocates for educating about state legislatures. 

• How Melissa weaves in WT (aka window time) into her day to give her space to reflect and how little shifts like reading the news from a newspaper instead of her phone helps her stay more present with her children. 

• The “epic snapshot moments” that have touched Melissa, from participating in Stand Up for the States with stars like Octavia Spencer to the thousands of conversations she has facilitated in Zoom rooms and living rooms across the country.

About Melissa Walker

Melissa Walker, Head of Giving Circles at The States Project. Melissa is the author of 10 novels for young adults and children. A former magazine editor, she now enjoys gathering people together to share stories about how they can pool their resources and change the balance of power in state legislatures — in fact, she helps organize over 200 Giving Circles across the country working on this mission. She is a graduate of Vassar College who hails from Chapel Hill, NC, and her work has appeared in publications including The New York Times and Teen Vogue.

The States Project aims to highlight the importance of state legislatures in shaping American lives and improving democracy. They provide resources to help state lawmakers effectively govern and push for necessary changes​.

Connect with Melissa

• Website | www.melissacwalker.com

• LinkedIn | www.linkedin.com/in/melissacwalker

• The States Project Website | statesproject.org

• X | @melissacwalker

This Episode’s Challenge:

Melissa invites us to reflect on how we can come together, not just in times of crisis, but proactively. Her challenge: think about how you can mobilize your community. Invite one friend to bring another, forming a powerful group that can create meaningful change, whether by starting a States Project Giving Circle or another form of collective effort.

Related Episodes and Resources To Explore Next: 

• Episode 104: Calm, Compassion, Clarity in the 2024 Election https://mothersquest.com/episode104/ 

• MOM THE VOTE: Election Impact Advice To Light Your Way https://mothersquest.com/mom-the-vote-election-impact-advice-to-light-your-way/ 

• Learn about States Project Giving Circles https://statesproject.org/get-involved/giving-circles/ 

• Watch a quick video about why state legislatures matter https://youtu.be/Kv68pp104UQ?si=TV74BJHUVNe4rr23 

• Generations : A States Project Giving Circle https://www.grapevine.org/giving-circle/wj6hg3K/Generations-A-States-Project-Giving-Circle 

This Episode is Dedicated by Nicole Lettiere  

About Nicole  Nicole Lettiere is a Principal of Industry Partnerships at The States Project, where she focuses on building impactful collaborations that drive change at the state level. She also serves as a Strategic Consultant at Propper Daley, a social impact agency where she has been applying her expertise in social innovation for over six years. Nicole’s career began in education as a middle school science teacher with Teach for America in New Orleans, where she created an arts-integrated science curriculum in partnership with the national Turnaround Arts program. A proud graduate of the University of Wisconsin-Madison, she was honored with the Joel Skornicka Service Award for her leadership in developing college readiness programs for underserved communities.

Connect with Nicole

• Linkedin | www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-lettiere 

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Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). In celebration of our 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 + reviews to honor 100 + episodes of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

I’m excited to share this conversation with my longtime fellow podcasting friend and parenting guide, Casey O’Roarty. Casey is a positive discipline trainer, certified coach and facilitator of personal growth and development, who encourages parents to discover the purpose of our journey. Through workshops, live and online classes, individual coaching, a published book, and her Joyful Courage Podcast, Casey helps us reconnect to our own empowerment and excitement in parenting, providing us with tools and a shift of mindset that allows us to deepen relationships with ourselves and our families. In recent years, as Casey’s own children have grown and flown, Casey has shifted her focus to supporting parents of tweens, teens and young adults. As I’m navigating fall school-year transitions—sending Ryan off to his junior year of college and guiding my youngest Jacob, now 12, as he starts middle school, I knew I wanted to interview Casey, so that I could anchor into her wisdom, humor and heart-centered approach to parenting during this pivotal time. In this episode, we dive into the heart of Casey’s E.P.I.C. life journey, from her experiences growing up as a child of divorce to her deep and supportive relationship with her daughter, Rowan. Casey shares openly about the ways that she had to evolve her own parenting and trust in the process, when Rowan’s mental health challenges in high school led Rowan to chart an untraditional path. We also talk about the gifts of midlife—self-awareness, personal growth, and the new adventures that come when we embrace our roles as “bird launchers” vs. empty nesters. This conversation left me deeply reflective about motherhood, the unpredictable twists and turns it brings, and the ways we can seek trust, connection, and even stillness in the midst of it all. I hope this conversation, and a Spark Session that Casey and I will collaborate on this fall, invite you to evolve your parenting, finding new ways to nurture connection with your children and within yourself. 

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• How Casey’s strained relationship with her mother transformed into a supportive one, with the birth of her first child as a catalyst for the transformation. 

• Casey learned to embrace uncertainty and trust the evolving process of parenting when her daughter Rowan experienced mental health challenges and charted an untraditional path in high school and beyond. 

• Casey’s positive discipline coaching practice has evolved to support parents of tween, teens and young adults, plus some of the tools she shares to help parents navigate tumultuous times. 

• Casey’s refusal to fear a future that has not manifested or created suffering if it is not needed. 

• The empowering perspective Casey holds on midlife, seeing it as a time of self-awareness, integrating personal growth with new life experiences.

About Casey O’Roarty 

Casey O’Roarty, Med, is a facilitator of personal growth and development.  Her work encourages parents to discover the purpose of their journey, while also providing them with tools and a shift of mindset that allows them to deepen their relationships with themselves and their families. As a Positive Discipline Trainer since 2007 and certified coach, Casey has led countless groups through workshops and classes that have left them feeling empowered and excited about parenting. She also offers an engaging podcast, live and online classes, and individual coaching at www.besproutable.com/teens.  Her first book, Joyful Courage: Calming the Drama and Taking Control of YOUR Parenting Journey was published May 20th, 2019. Casey lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband and loves any time she can get with her launched kiddos.

Connect with Casey:

• 6 week class starts Tuesday Sept 24th - www.besproutable.com/teens/positive-discipline-classes/#deep-dive-classes

• Parenting Classes: www.besproutable.com/elementary/parent-coaching/

• Website: www.besproutable.com/teens/

• IG: @joyful_courage

• FB Group for parents of teens: www.facebook.com/groups/jcforparentsofteens

This Episode’s Challenge:

Casey invites us to dedicate space and time for self-reflection, whether through journaling, voice memos or using the Insight Timer. She also invited parents to join her six-week positive discipline class, which started September 24 but is still under way. Stay tuned for more details on a Spark Session we are organizing together “Nurturing Connection While Launching Our Kids.” 

Related Episodes and Resources To Explore Next: 

• An Honest Conversation with Rowan About Her Journey of Mental Health & Self Discovery with Casey and Rowan O’Roarty

• Ep 102: Milestone Hike Revisited: A Mother Son Neurodiversity Journey

• Alfred Adler: Theory and Application 

• DBT: Dialectical Behavior Therapy

Book mentioned:

• "The Baby Catcher" by Peggy Vincent (memoir of a midwife)

This Episode is Dedicated by Elsie Escobar

Hello, I'm Elsie Escobar, and I'm honored to dedicate this episode of the Mother's Quest podcast to Casey O’Roarty. I met Casey for the first time in 2015 when she was part of a mastermind that I was co-running at the time. From 2015 to now, Casey has worked with me often, and I've been honored to continue to mentor her and really help her with her podcast, Joyful Courage. The gift of getting to know Casey has been incredible. I've always been a big believer that those I work with have something to teach me, and every time a new person comes to work with me directly, I feel there's something I need to learn as well. And this has never been more true than with Casey.

Casey has turned out to be my guide more than once, but more importantly recently, because I now have teenagers—two teenagers that I am a mama of. One of them, as Casey would say, is my teacher and continues to teach me the things I need to learn. At times, it's been scary, anxiety-inducing, dark, and hopeless. These are just some of the feelings that have come and gone lately. Really being able to listen to Casey's wisdom on parenting as my coach and hear her voice on her podcast, I'm not sure what I would have done, particularly this past year. She was instrumental in holding my hand across a very precarious bridge, and I just want to say thank you. I love you, Casey. You're amazing.

ABOUT ELSIE ESCOBAR

Elsie Escobar is a dedicated advocate, mentor, and a leading voice in the podcasting industry with over 17 years of experience. A fierce champion for diversity and representation, Elsie has consistently pushed the boundaries to elevate underrepresented voices in the space.

As the Director of Community and Content at Libsyn, she is the creative powerhouse behind “The Feed: The Official Libsyn Podcast,” which has just marked its 10th anniversary with over 1.6 million downloads. Elsie leads content strategy, concept development, and fosters meaningful engagement with podcasters across the globe.

Her impact extends beyond her role at Libsyn. Elsie has pioneered innovative content and social media strategies, inspired the creation of the society and culture track at Podcast Movement, and was honored with an induction into the Academy of Podcasters Hall of Fame.

Elsie co-founded She Podcasts, the first large-scale community for women and non-binary podcasters, where her passion and commitment inspired a vibrant space for over 20,000 members to connect, learn, and nurture each other’s growth.

She is also known for her educational contributions, offering workshops, webinars, and meet-ups designed to empower podcasters at every stage of their journey. Through initiatives like #ClaimPodParity, she amplifies the voices of female audio creators, and as a spokesperson for Edison’s Latino Podcast Listening Report, she highlights the influence of Latino voices in podcasting. She is deeply involved with the BIPOC Podcast Creators initiative, supporting multicultural creators to find their footing and flourish in the industry.

Through all her efforts, Elsie has built and nurtured a vibrant podcasting community, inspiring countless individuals to discover their voice, embrace their unique journeys, and succeed in the ever-evolving podcasting landscape.

Connect with Elsie Escobar

• Website | elsieescobar.com

• Instagram | @theelsieescobar

• X (Twitter) @TheElsieEscobar

• LinkedIn | www.linkedin.com/in/elsieescobar

BIG NEWS!

Mother’s Quest is a finalist for the Signal Awards, which honors the best in podcasting, judged by a collective of industry trailblazers. We're up for bronze, silver, or gold in the Family and Childraising Category—and we’re also in the running for the Listener’s Choice Award. That’s where you come in! Head to mothersquest.com/vote to cast your vote and help us win!

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). In celebration of our 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 + reviews to honor 100 + episodes of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

I’m excited to share with you this special episode featuring bite-sized messages from past podcast guests with practices to help us stay grounded, find calm, and regulate our nervous systems in these final days leading up to the 2024 U.S. election! The inspiration for it… A few weeks ago, amid some election anxiety and inspired by my friend Katie Hanus, I committed to just 10 minutes of meditation. Lying on my back, I looked up at the wind moving through a beautiful redwood tree in my backyard. As I watched, I listened to the sound of a nearby wind chime. My breath began to slow, my racing thoughts calmed, and I could think and feel more clearly again. If you want a little taste of this moment, you can watch the video I shared on Instagram @mothersquestpod

These are wild, heartbreaking, hopeful, and scary times, and the stakes are high. There is tragedy abroad and in our own communities, and it often feels like democracy itself is on the line. Mothers in my circle, especially, are trying to figure out how to show up for our children, contribute to this election, care for ourselves, and weave together a stronger community.

That moment under the redwood tree reminded me of the importance of finding calm and clarity within the storm. So, I reached out to a few of my amazing podcast guests for some perspectives and practices we can use during this time. I invite you to listen, try some of the practices in real-time as you do, and consider adding one or more of these to your daily routine. I’m grateful to Valarie Kaur, Dr. Elisa Song, Jamie Greenwood, Dr. Avanti Kumar-Singh and Jenjii Hysten for saying “yes ” to my invitation when I reached out in need and sharing these thoughtful contributions with us. I encourage you to follow them and tune into my past podcast episodes with them for more wisdom. After listening, I felt more calm, clear and ready to contribute. If you listened to this episode and try any of the practices they recommend, I’d love to know how they are supporting you. Share in the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group or on instagram and tag me @mothersquestpod. I’d also love to hear any of your own practices or those you’ve learned from others that are helping you. Ending with a reminder that we do not have to do this alone and some words I wrote in a Medium post I referenced from 2016. After getting support then, much like I just did now, I shared… “I feel like I am breathing now for the first time in over a week, and though moments of fear, sadness and outrage still come, instead of pushing them down, I am breathing them in, mixing them with equal parts hopefulness and love, and a commitment to do my part to take action.” Topics Discussed:

• Valerie Kaur guides us through a powerful meditation to connect with our full range of emotions, including grief and anger

• Dr Elisa Song shares a simple yet effective mindfulness practice called "Stop, Look, and Listen" that both kids and adults can use

• Jamie Greenwood offers invitations for self-compassion, finding joy during chaotic times and catching our breath 

• Dr. Avanti Kumar-Singh teaches us how to use breathwork to gain clarity when focusing on the inhale and calm by focusing on the exhale

• Jenjii Hysten shares three profound life lessons birthed from grief and challenge 

About Valarie Kaur:

VALARIE KAUR is a renowned civil rights leader, lawyer, award-winning filmmaker, educator, innovator, author of the #1 LA Times Bestseller SEE NO STRANGER, and founder of the Revolutionary Love Project. Valarie burst into global consciousness when her 2016 Watch Night Service address went viral with 40 million views worldwide. Her question “Is this the darkness of the tomb – or the darkness of the womb?” reframes the historical moment and is now a mantra for people fighting for change.

Valarie became an activist when a Sikh father and family friend Balbir Singh Sodhi was the first person murdered in hate violence in the aftermath of 9/11. For two decades, in his memory, Valarie led visionary campaigns to tell untold stories and change policy on issues ranging from hate crimes to digital freedom. Her work ignited a national movement to reclaim love as a force for justice. In 2021, she led the People’s Inauguration, inspiring millions of Americans to renew their role in building a healthy, multiracial democracy.

Today, the Revolutionary Love Project is seeding networked communities of practice across the country, equipping people with the practical tools to build beloved community and transform the nation from inside out. In the last two decades, Valarie has won policy change on multiple fronts – hate crimes, racial profiling, immigration detention, solitary confinement, Internet freedom, and more. She founded Groundswell Movement, Faithful Internet, and the Yale Visual Law Project to equip advocates at the intersection of spirituality, storytelling, and justice.

Valarie has been a regular TV commentator on MSNBC and contributor to CNN, NPR, PBS, the Hill, Huffington Post, and the Washington Post. She is a celebrated prophetic voice and has spoken widely, including at President Biden’s Inaugural Prayer Service. Valarie earned degrees at Stanford University, Harvard Divinity School, and Yale Law School, and holds several honorary doctorates. In Fall 2022, President Biden honored Valarie at the White House in the first-ever Uniters Ceremony, naming her as one of 16 leaders whose work is healing America.

A daughter of Punjabi farmers, Valarie grew up on the farmlands of California, where her family has lived for more than a century. Her grandfather gave her Sikh wisdom through stories and songs that showed the way of the sant-sipahi, sage-warrior. The sage loves; the warrior fights — it is a path of revolutionary love.

Connect with Valarie:

• Website | valariekaur.com

• Facebook | www.facebook.com/valarie.kaur.page

• Instagram | @valariekaur

• World of Wonder by Valerie Kaur

About Dr. Elisa Song, MD

Dr. Elisa Song, MD is an integrative pediatrician, pediatric functional medicine expert, and mom to 2 thriving children. In her integrative pediatric practice, Whole Family Wellness, she’s helped 1000s of kids get to the root causes of their health concerns and helped their parents understand how to help their children thrive – body, mind, and spirit – by integrating conventional pediatrics with functional medicine, homeopathy, acupuncture, herbal medicine, and essential oils. Dr. Song created Healthy Kids Happy Kids as an online holistic pediatric resource to help practitioners and parents bridge the gap between conventional and integrative pediatrics with an evidence-based, pediatrician-backed approach.

Her new book, Healthy Kids, Happy Kids released on May 14, 2024 teaches parents and children how to create Microbiome Magic for a lifetime of resilient bodies, brains, and immune systems.

Connect with Dr. Elisa

• X (Twitter) @ElisaSongMD

• Facebook | Healthy Kids Happy Kids

• Instagram | @healthykids_happykids

• Website | healthykidshappykids.com

• Healthy Kids, Happy Kids: An Integrative Pediatrician's Guide to Whole Child Resilience by Dr. Elisa Song

About Jamie Greenwood:

Jamie Greenwood is a self care and leadership coach and the founder of Homecoming, a 6 month group coaching program that teaches big-dreaming, high-achieving women how to set boundaries and find home in themselves, without an ounce of guilt. With over 15 years experience, Jamie specializes in helping women get really clear on who they are, how they want to live and then actually doing it on their own terms.

Jamie is also the host of The Path Home, a podcast that explores the many facets of home, how we find home in ourselves and how we create a sense of home in our work, our relationships, our communities and in the future we want to see.

When Jamie’s not coaching, speaking, or podcasting, you can find her running after her 14 year old, 6 year old and 4 year old daughters and wondering what’s for dinner.

Connect with Jamie:

• Website | https://jamiegreenwood.co/

• Podcast | https://jamiegreenwood.co/the-path-home-podcast

• Facebook | www.facebook.com/jamie.m.greenwood

• Instagram https://www.instagram.com/jamiegreenwoodcoaching/

• The Path Home Podcast |  Jamie Greenwood 

About Avanti Kumar-Singh

Avanti Kumar-Singh is a physician who, after medical training in emergency medicine, began a journey to find her joy again- and to help people truly heal. Realizing that you can “quit your job but you can’t quit your calling”, Avanti set out to discover what really makes people healthy and what predisposes them to illness.She is now on a mission to evolve the conversation and to create a movement in which medical professionals reclaim the “art” of medicine and become heart-centered, healing catalysts that practice true medicine and support self-healing in their patients.

Over the 20 years of her training, study and research, Avanti has shared her expertise with Fortune 500 companies, elite undergraduate and graduate institutions and at prestigious industry and medical conferences. She has also been featured in the Huffington Post and was a member of upwave.com’s review board—Turner media’s former health and wellness entertainment brand. Avanti is currently the co-lead facilitator of the Faculty Scholars Program in Integrative Healthcare at the OSHER Center for Integrative Medicine at Northwestern Medicine in Chicago.

Avanti holds a BA in Art History from the University of Chicago and an MD from Rush University College of Medicine. She is also a certified plant-based professional and a certified yoga therapist (C-IAYT). Avanti lives in Chicago with her husband and two children. Her first book, Ayurveda for Everyone, will be published in late 2019.

Connect with Avanti

• Instagram | @avantikumarsingh

• LinkedIn | www.linkedin.com/in/avanti-kumar-singh-md

• Facebook | www.facebook.com/groups/ayurvedaforeveryonewithdravanti

• The Healing Catalyst Podcast | Dr. Avanti Kumar Singh

About Jenjii Hysten

Jenjii Hysten is an advocate, teacher, lifelong learner, facilitator, author, and a visionary with over 20 years of experience in the education and human services arenas. She is devoted to creating dynamic and engaging learning opportunities through coaching and technical assistance to build the capacity of educational and youth development organizations throughout the Bay Area. In addition to leading Blaze Consulting Group, she provides intensive training and facilitation to support resident service divisions of major public housing developers throughout the state of California. Utilizing her Bachelor of Art, Interdisciplinary Studies degree from UC Berkeley with a focus on Urban Economic Development, Jenjii quickly assesses complex organizational issues and needs to develop creative solutions to help solve problems.

Jenjii is a poignant speaker and storyteller with a gift for making people feel loved right where they are. Beloved for her ability to bring diverse groups of people together, Jenjii inspires leaders to have honest, heart opening conversations that lead to action. She shows audiences how to turn trauma into a catalyst for transformation for one’s self and the larger world.

Jenjii’s background at the intersections of: executive coaching, anti-racist training, innovative design, curriculum development, women entrepreneurship, education & youth development, make her a go-to keynote speaker, coach and consultant for organizations, associations, and conferences across industries and sectors. Prior to launching Blaze Consulting Group, Jenjii was the founding Executive Director of Saving Our Sisters, Saving Our Selves, a charter school Dean of Students. Jenjii is also the author of Beyond the Hashtag: The Spirit, Heart and Love of Black Men.

Connect with Jenjii

• Website | blazeconsulting.group

• Instagram | @jenjiifaith

• LinkedIn | www.linkedin.com/in/jenjii-hysten-407aa045

Listen to These Full Episodes:

• Ep 100: Mothering as Revolutionary Love

• Ep 06: Healthy and Happy with Dr. Elisa Song

• Coming Home To Ourselves with Self-Care Coach Jamie Greenwood

• The Healer Lies Within through Ayurveda with Avanti Kumar-Singh

• Encore: Living Out Loud with Jenjii Hysten

For More Election Wisdom: 

• MOM THE VOTE: Election Impact Advice To Light Your Way

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). In celebration of our 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 + reviews to honor 100 + episodes of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

I’m honored to share this special Father’s Day edition of the Mother’s Quest Podcast. This episode features my friend  Jeff Steinberg, whose commitment to the lessons of the civil rights movement can shine a light for us now, during another pivotal time in our nation’s history.

Jeff and I first crossed paths when our sons, Ryan and Journey, now 20 years old, became inseparable friends in preschool. While waiting to pick up our kids, I instantly connected with Jeff as I learned about the transformative work he was doing as Executive Director of Sojourn to the Past, also known as the Sojourn Project.

Years before I would create Mother’s Quest, Jeff modeled the power of forging his own purposeful path. After 14 years of teaching A.P. American History, Jeff founded Sojourn to move beyond the limitations of the classroom, delving students into the lessons of the civil rights movement and bringing history to life. 

Through week-long journeys to the South, students visit historic locations, delve into primary source materials, hear from Civil Rights icons, and engage in deep discussions. By stepping out of the classroom, students are immersed in a shared history not covered in our textbooks. They return empowered to drive personal, social, and civic change in their own communities.

Since his first trip in 1999, Jeff has received tremendous recognition for his impact, receiving state and national awards including The Coretta Scott King A.N.G.E.L. (Advancing Nonviolence Through Generations of Exceptional Leadership) Award and the National Arts and Humanities Youth Programs Award. He has led over 19,000 students and community adults on these transformative journeys, shaping their futures in profound ways. I loved this opportunity to go deep with Jeff into the lessons learned through Sojourn, the belief that ordinary people can do extraordinary things and that we all have a role to play to speak out against injustice. Jeff shares honestly about his own personal grappling with our nation’s history, the principles of nonviolence, and the issues we face today, including the horrors unfolding in Israel and Palestine and the student protests here. While you might not agree with everything he says, I hope the thoughtful perspectives he shares inspires you, as it did me, to say yes to a sojourn trip of your own and to move with authenticity into your own transformational activism. 

Topics Discussed in this Episode

• How Jeff’s family and particularly his older brother, who played speeches of MLK and Bobby Kennedy while Jeff was growing up, influenced his commitment to social justice. 

• Jeff’s path from teaching A.P. American History to founding Sojourn to the Past, bringing civil rights history to life through immersive student journeys.

• The importance of connecting our children, in developmentally appropriate ways, to our nation’s challenges and how Jeff raised his sons to explore their own authentic path to allyship.

• The impact of the principles of nonviolence on Jeff’s life and how finding his own inner peace is a work in progress. 

• The work Sojourn is doing to reform policing and the justice system through bringing officers and district attorneys on the trips. 

• Why shame and guilt are destructive feelings and how to shift to empowerment and responsibility instead. 

• The lack of knowledge of our shared history and who Jeff believes are our nation’s real founding fathers and mothers. 

• Jeff’s personal reflections on the horrors unfolding in Israel and Palestine and the responsibility he feels as an American Jew to speak out against the oppression of the Palestinian people. 

• His respect for student activism and the conversation he recently had with a student protester at one of the university encampments. 

• The importance of dialogue, reciprocity, and building shared compassion.

About Jeff Steinberg

After 14 years of teaching Advanced Placement U.S. History, “Mr. Steinberg” founded Sojourn to the Past out of a passion for exploring civil rights and the desire to provide a transformational and experiential educational experience for his students. He has designed rigorous, relevant, and standards-based curriculum filled with rich primary source documents, in the hopes that students will benefit from exploring systemic injustices of the past as a means to better understand and address our current challenges. Mr. Steinberg has led over eight thousand students through Sojourn’s living history lesson, along the path of the Civil Rights Movement, through five states in the Southern United States. Additionally, he makes hundreds of interactive presentations annually across the country on the lessons of the Civil Rights Movement. For his efforts, Mr. Steinberg and the organization have received numerous state and national awards including: The Coretta Scott King A.N.G.E.L. (Advancing Nonviolence Through Generations of Exceptional Leadership) Award, and the National Arts and Humanities Youth Programs Award.

Connect with Jeff and Sojourn

• LinkedIn | Jeff Steinberg

• Website | www.sojournproject.org

• Instagram | @sojournproject

This Episode’s Challenge

Jeff gives us all an open invitation to join one of the Sojourn project trips and immerse ourselves in the living history and lessons of the civil rights movement. He encourages us to explore the written texts and documentaries that they use on the trips at this link. And, he invites us to think about how we can each use our voices to be allies and find our own authentic, transformative path to activism.  

About Sojourn Project

For over 20 years and through 100+ study trips to the American Deep South and Washington, D.C., Sojourn Project has been immersing people from diverse backgrounds in academic, transformative weeklong moving-classroom Journeys. Along the path and through the lens of the Modern Civil Rights Movement and America’s struggles for liberty. Living history. Learning about sacrifices made and lives taken to achieve the right to vote and equality. Our greatest hope is for people to recognize that they too can stand up to injustice and do extraordinary things. A California-based nonprofit, Sojourn has been honored by the United States Congress as the longest-running social justice education and outreach program of its kind.

Related Episodes and Resources To Explore Next

From Mother’s Quest: 

• Ep 55: From Grief to Advocacy and a Circle of Mothers

• Ep 75: A Call for Kinetic Partnership with While Black’s Darius Hicks 

• EP33: Beyond the Trauma: Legacy, Compassion and Change with Mothers Against Police Brutality Co-Founder Sara Mokuria

• Ep 82: Honoring Black Mothers with Anna Malaika Tubbs author of The Three Mothers 

Sojourn Recommended Resources: 

• Minnijean Brown-Trickey, a Sojourn to the Past on YouTube

• Power Documentary on Netflix

• Movie: Origin based on the Isabel Wilkerson book Caste

• Notes on Virginia by Thomas Jefferson

• Slavery by Another Name by Isabel Wilkerson

• Caste by Isabel Wilkerson

• Walking with the Wind by John Lewis

• Song for Cesar: A Documentary

• SOJOURN PROJECT Media Archives: Book/Documentary List

• Six Principles of Non-Violence 

• Walking with the Wind: A Memoir of the Movement

• Elizabeth and Hazel: Two Women of Little Rock

This Episode is Dedicated by Kristi Donna Ng

Kristi Donna Ng is an award-winning screenwriter, actress, producer and hula dancer. Her short films have been screened at the Boston Asian American Film Festival, Syracuse International Film Festival (1st Place Winner), The Barrow Group's 48 Hour Film Festival (Two-time Audience Award Winner) and The Sparrow Film Project where she was nominated for a Best Supporting Actress Award. Select theatre credits: Heartstrings (Atlantic Theater Company), Joker (National Queer Theatre), Same Time Next Week (Joust Theatre Company), Love/Sick (PaperKids Theatre Company). Kristi received her Masters Degree in Politics from New York University and previously worked at Human Rights Watch.

• Instagram: @krisdng

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). In celebration of our 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 + reviews to honor 100 + episodes of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

Welcome to this first episode of Season Nine of the Mother’s Quest Podcast with a returning and special guest, my own son Ryan Neale.

I first sat down to record an episode with Ryan in 2017, on his 13th birthday, after we embarked on a milestone hike, using the ascent and descent at our local Sugarloaf Peak to pack up the lessons of his first 13 years of life and my first 13 years of motherhood. 

At that time, Ryan knew he wanted to close out his teenage years the same way he began them. So this past March, in what felt like the blink of an eye, his 20th birthday approached and Ryan returned from college so we could set out on the trail again. Though the path was familiar, we soon recognized just how much we each had grown, maturing through heartache and triumph in our own ways.

We knew we would want to record our reflections from the hike again in a special recording studio and with the support of someone who might help us go even deeper. The answer to our quest appeared in the form of Tricia Creason-Valencia, co-founder of PowerHouse, and who Ryan and I have been partnering with on a new initiative, the Autism Storytelling Project. It therefore also felt right to invite Tricia to dedicate this episode. Listen in for her beautiful dedication. You’ll also hear her voice toward the end of our conversation, asking us each a question that brought us both to tears. 

Along with some tears, there were many moments of insight and even some laughter, as we share about this 20 year milestone in both of our lives, the lessons we've learned about our neurodivergent identities especially, and about the exciting chapters unfolding for us. It was a gift to experience this and also to share it with you. Ryan and I both hope this conversation inspires you to find your unique way to mark the milestones in your life, to reflect mindfully with your children, and to give yourselves opportunities to see one another, champion one another, and to grow alongside one another.

About Ryan Neale

Ryan Neale is a neurodivergent sophomore at UCLA, planning to double major in Communication and Disability Studies with a minor in Film Studies. He is part of the College Scholars Program at UCLA and recently was selected as part of the 2023 Chancellor’s Leadership Program cohort. He is passionate about neurodiversity advocacy and sharing his own experiences to pave the way for others. He is currently a staff member at the Bruin Resource Center, where he is a student lead on a new campus-wide neurodiversity initiative, the Bruin Neurodiversity Collective, to make UCLA more inclusive for students like him. This summer, he served on staff for the Stanford Neurodiversity Project – Research, Education, and Advocacy Camp for high schoolers wanting to create neurodiversity advocacy projects. He was also a speaker at the 2021 Stanford Neurodiversity Summit and has been a guest host on the Mother’s Quest Podcast. Ryan was diagnosed with autism at the age of 18 months old and also identifies with ADHD and anxiety.

Connect with Ryan

• Website | www.ryanjneale.com
• LinkedIn |  https://www.linkedin.com/in/ryan-neale-031112176/
• Instagram | @ryan.neale04

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• The origins of our first milestone hike and why it was important to Ryan to end his teenage years in the same way he began them. 

• Ryan's grappling with his autistic identity, and how his desire to be “normal” over his teenage years was like navigating a “toxic ex.” 

• Our growth and learning journey as a spiral, inviting us to revisit similar challenges but with new levels of self-awareness and knowledge. 

• How Ryan's perception of autism shifted over time, from internalized ableism and heavy masking toward self-acceptance and more authenticity.. 

• My diagnosis of ADHD just before my 50th birthday and how my own perceptions of neurodiversity have shifted. 

• The ways that both of us used our voices to highlight gaps in support for neurodivergent students at UCLA and how that led to Ryan co-founding The Bruin Neurodiversity Collective. 

• Ryan’s first quarter at UCLA crash and burn and how writing his story about that experience for Business Insider was a turning point. 

• How Ryan putting himself out there and experiencing rejection after rejection ultimately led him to the greatest gift of all. 

• The letter of acknowledgment I wrote for Ryan about all the qualities I see in him. I read through tears but am so glad I persevered and could share it with him (and you!)

• The power of mother and son sharing and growing alongside one another. 

This Episode Dedicated by: Tricia Creason-Valencia and The Autism Storytelling Project

Tricia Creason-Valencia is a dynamic force in the world of filmmaking, education & community building. Through the art of storytelling, Tricia weaves her own raw narrative of mothering, making movies, resilience and rediscovery. As an Emmy-Nominated Director/Producer, Motivational Speaker and Co-Founder of PowerHouse, she pioneers the way for women, people of color and youth to amplify their voices and claim their power through creative expression. She believes, deep in her soul, that truth-telling fosters empathy and connection, serving as a catalyst for social change.

• Tricia Speaks! | SPEAKER | CO-FOUNDER | FILMMAKER - Link-in-bio
• LinkedIn | https://www.linkedin.com/in/flacafilms/
• Instagram | @flacafilms

About The Autism Storytelling Project

The Autism Storytelling Project empowers young autistic people who aspire to tell authentic autistic stories through creative expression by awarding unrestricted grants. The goal of the project is to expand understanding about autism by elevating stories about the personal experiences of autistic young people ages 16-25 in Santa Clara County, CA. All forms of art and creative expression are welcome, but the story must focus on the artist's lived experience as an autistic person, or on autism as a whole. Connect with the Autism Storytelling Project:

• ‌Website | Autism Storytelling Project
• Instagram | @autismstorytellingproject

About PowerHouse 

PowerHouse is a creative co-working space for women+ entrepreneurs, video and podcasting production studio and venue for professional development & creativity workshops committed to amplifying women’s voices. PowerHouse is a women & minority-owned social entrepreneurship venture in the heart of downtown San Jose founded by Farran Tabrizi and Tricia Creason-Valencia.

• Website | http://Powerhouse-SJ.com
• Meet the Co-Founders | PowerHouse-Founders — Tabrizi Productions - Bay Area Videography | Corporate Video | Animation | BRAND VIDEO | VIDEO EDITING‌

Other Related Episodes and Resources: 

• YOLO (You Only Live Once) and Other Milestone Reflections *Revisited* with Ryan Neale

• Embracing Neurodiversity and Being an Adult with Julie Lythcott-Haims and Ryan Neale
• Learning Outside the Lines in College with Neurodivergent Advocates Ryan Neale & Jonathan Mooney
• Neurodivergent Students In College: Support Your Child With Lessons Learned From Ryan and Julie
• Ryan's Business Insider Article - I'm an Autistic College Freshman at UCLA. I Wore Myself Out Socially.

Mother’s Quest May Gift Guide – Gift Yourselves and the Mothers You Love Beyond Mother’s Day!

Put yourself on your priority list and choose something special for yourself this Mother’s Day. Take a peek inside the Mother’s Quest Gift Guide at some of my favorite things I’ve curated for you. 

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).In celebration of our recent 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 reviews to honor our 100th episode milestone of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

Welcome to this last conversation of 2023, with coach, teacher, small group and retreat facilitator at Revolution from Home, mother of four daughters and author of the book Motherwhelmed, Beth Berry. Beth says she has revolution in her bones. It began when she was seventeen and pumping milk in the bathroom of her high school for her now-grown eldest daughter. It has since gradually evolved into a tender, fiery conviction to reclaim motherhood from every disempowering personal and cultural story she can wrap her head and heart around. Beth has spent thousands of hours mentoring and supporting mothers through their process of self-discovery, self-reclamation, and dream realization, reminding us of our worthiness and reframing our importance as changemakers. One of the mothers Beth has mentored is Katie Hanus, one of the members of my very first Mother’s Quest Virtual Circle, created over five years ago. Katie and the other members of that first Circle and I are in almost daily conversation together on Voxer where we share the ups and downs of our epic lives and the lessons we’re learning from guides who help light our way. It was through Katie that I first heard about Beth’s transformative work and hoped I could one day interview her for the podcast. 

Building deep relationships among mothers is something Beth invites us to explore as her challenge in this episode. Without the web of connections that used to come in the form of a village,  we blame ourselves when we’re unable to live up to superhuman standards with subhuman levels of support. Beth also offers a beautiful opportunity to invest and care for ourselves through tending to what she calls our soul fire, a representation of the things that restore and sustain us. She invites us to think about how we can add not just quick-burning kindling to this soul fire, but the big logs that can burn steadily. I hope this conversation can be a spark for you to put yourself at the center during this holiday and new year season, commit to building rich, meaningful connections with other mothers where you live, and add some long-burning logs to your soul fire. In so doing, may 2024 become a year for a revolution and reclamation from home of your own. 

About Beth Berry

Beth Berry is a coach, teacher, small group and retreat facilitator, mother of four daughters and author of Motherwhelmed. A revolutionary at heart, she helps mothers get more of what they want and need to feel fulfilled and empowered despite the odds. She believes that self-aware, self-compassionate, well-supported mothers who know themselves to be worthy of pleasure and joy-filled lives are powerful beyond measure and essential to the healing of the world.

Connect with Beth Berry

Website | revolutionfromhome.com

Instagram | @revolutionfromhome

Facebook | Revolution from Home

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• The ways in which we inherit our mothers’ “hand me downs” and the ones that shaped Beth and planted seeds for her own revolution.

• The series of spark moments, most of which she says were not pretty, that set Beth on living her epic life.

• Beth’s intuitive approach to motherhood and how she practiced mindful engagement with her children from the beginning, even at the age of 17 when she had her first daughter.

• The deep sense of purpose she feels for changing the narratives around motherhood and shifting the systems that invisibilize the unpaid caregiving of mothers. 

• The power of tending to our soul fire.

• Why some of the entitlement she notices in her daughters gives her hope for a more empowered generation of mothers in the future.  

• How internalized narratives of hyper-individualism can hinder connection between mothers.

• The post-it Beth has on her computer that says “A well rested woman is dangerous” 

Books Beth Mentions:

• Beth Berry’s Book | Motherwhelmed

• Jaiya John Book | Freedom: Medicine Words for Your Brave Revolution

• Clarissa Pinkola Estés Book | Women Who Run with the Wolves: Myths and Stories of the Wild Woman Archetype

• Toko-pa Turner Book | Belonging: Remembering Ourselves Home

• Pete Walker: books, biography, latest update

• Kimberly Ann Johnson Book | Call of the Wild: How We Heal Trauma, Awaken Our Own Power, and Use It For Good

• Sonya Renee Taylor: Books

• Adrienne Maree Brown Books

• Esther Perel: Books 

• Eve Rodsky Book | Fair Play: A Game-Changing Solution for When You Have Too Much to Do (and More Life to Live) (Reese's Book Club)

• Angela Garbes Book | Essential Labor: Mothering as Social Change

Other Related Episodes You Might Enjoy Next: 

• Reclaiming Our Time and Creativity with Eve Rodsky

• Slay Your Dragon of Self Doubt with Returning Guest Katherine Wintsch

• Ep 98: Sometimes Change Sucks “Reflections at the 5 year Anniversary of the Manifesto Challenge” With Graeme Seabrook

• Ep 41: Reclaiming Ourselves in Motherhood ~A Mother’s Day Special~ with Graeme Seabrook

This Episode’s Challenge: 

Beth challenges you to pause and reflect when you feel like you're not doing enough. Ask yourself who benefits from that belief and who is harmed by it. Explore the reasons behind the pressure to over-function and consider if there might be healthier ways to self-soothe and achieve your desired life. She also invites us to invest in building relationships with mothers where we live, beginning to restore a sense of village that we have lost. Brave new connections in your community. Knock on some doors in your neighborhood.

  The Mother’s Quest Holiday and New Year Gift Guide: 

Put yourself on your priority list and choose something for yourself this holiday season from our Gift Guide. Take a peek inside and see some of my favorite things that I’ve curated for you, including the 2024 Live Your EPIC Year planners. https://mothersquest.com/2024-planners/

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). In celebration of our 100th episode, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 reviews to honor 100 episodes this Season Eight of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

This September 11, 2023, I had the honor of holding space for an intimate conversation with civil rights leader, lawyer, award-winning filmmaker, educator, and best-selling author of the book SEE NO STRANGER, Valarie Kaur. The fact that we were recording on September 11th was meaningful, because the tragic event that had taken place 22 years ago shaped Valarie in profound ways and set her on a path that she never expected. Valarie became an activist after a man of the same Sikh faith, a father and family friend she called uncle, Balbir Singh Sodhi, was the first person murdered in hate violence in the aftermath of 9/11. For two decades in his memory, Valarie led visionary campaigns to tell untold stories and change policy on issues ranging from hate crimes to solitary confinement to digital freedom. Along the way, she earned degrees at Stanford University, Harvard Divinity School, and Yale Law School. Today, Valarie is the mother of two children and as you’ll hear her share, the experience of becoming a mother inspired her to birth the Revolutionary Love Project, which supports communities with practical tools to transform the nation from inside out. Revolutionary love, Valarie says, “is the choice to labor for others, for opponents, and for ourselves. Love is sweet labor — fierce, bloody, imperfect, life-giving, a choice we make. And it begins with wonder. You can look at anyone and say: You are a part of me I don’t yet know. From there, we begin to transform the world around us, and inside us.” There is a lightness and hopefulness in the tone of our conversation that we wouldn't have in the same way if we recorded the conversation today. I'm grateful for it. Valarie thanked me at the end for giving her the deepest breath she had in a long time. During a time in our country and world, where so many seem to be disconnected from a sense of our common humanity and divisions between us are widening, I hope this conversation is a deep breath for you. Because as Valarie says as she evokes the metaphor of a midwife in her famous Watch Night speech, linked in the show notes, we must first breathe and then we push. The mother asks "what if this darkness we face is not the darkness of the tomb, but the darkness of the womb?" Today we breathe and tomorrow we will labor in revolutionary love. 

About Valarie Kaur:

VALARIE KAUR is a renowned civil rights leader, lawyer, award-winning filmmaker, educator, innovator, author of the #1 LA Times Bestseller SEE NO STRANGER, and founder of the Revolutionary Love Project. Valarie burst into global consciousness when her 2016 Watch Night Service address went viral with 40 million views worldwide. Her question “Is this the darkness of the tomb – or the darkness of the womb?” reframes the historical moment and is now a mantra for people fighting for change.

Valarie became an activist when a Sikh father and family friend Balbir Singh Sodhi was the first person murdered in hate violence in the aftermath of 9/11. For two decades, in his memory, Valarie led visionary campaigns to tell untold stories and change policy on issues ranging from hate crimes to digital freedom. Her work ignited a national movement to reclaim love as a force for justice. In 2021, she led the People’s Inauguration, inspiring millions of Americans to renew their role in building a healthy, multiracial democracy. Today, the Revolutionary Love Project is seeding networked communities of practice across the country, equipping people with the practical tools to build beloved community and transform the nation from inside out. In the last two decades, Valarie has won policy change on multiple fronts – hate crimes, racial profiling, immigration detention, solitary confinement, Internet freedom, and more. She founded Groundswell Movement, Faithful Internet, and the Yale Visual Law Project to equip advocates at the intersection of spirituality, storytelling, and justice.

Valarie has been a regular TV commentator on MSNBC and contributor to CNN, NPR, PBS, the Hill, Huffington Post, and the Washington Post. She is a celebrated prophetic voice and has spoken widely, including at President Biden’s Inaugural Prayer Service. Valarie earned degrees at Stanford University, Harvard Divinity School, and Yale Law School, and holds several honorary doctorates. In Fall 2022, President Biden honored Valarie at the White House in the first-ever Uniters Ceremony, naming her as one of 16 leaders whose work is healing America.

A daughter of Punjabi farmers, Valarie grew up on the farmlands of California, where her family has lived for more than a century. Her grandfather gave her Sikh wisdom through stories and songs that showed the way of the sant-sipahi, sage-warrior. The sage loves; the warrior fights — it is a path of revolutionary love.

Connect with Valarie:

• Website | valariekaur.com

• Facebook | www.facebook.com/valarie.kaur.page

• Instagram | @valariekaur

Resources from Valarie:

• Revolutionary Love Project Website 

• See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love

• Valarie’s TED Talk: 3 Lessons of Revolutionary Love in a Time of Rage

• Valarie’s Famous Watch Night Speech: Breathe and Push 

• The Revolutionary Love Training Course 

• 9/11 20th Anniversary Learning Hub

• Wise Woman Guided Inquiry 

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• Valarie's story about the birth of her son, with her mother by her side, and the lessons she learned about motherhood from that experience.

• Mothering as a verb and how mothering often feels like walking through a ring of fire. 

• The experiences that set Valarie on a path of activism after 9/11 and the surprising spark moment she learned from her grieving aunt. 

• How becoming a mother changed Valarie’s orientation from activism fighting against hate to activism fighting for revolutionary love.

• Valarie’s experience moving to the Rainforest to reflect on all she learned and write her book See No Stranger.  

• Revolutionary love as the call of our times.

• Valarie’s epic snapshot moment nursing her daughter while she was at the White House being honored.

• The quote from Audrey Lorde that reminds Valarie to care for and invest in herself - “We can learn to mother ourselves.” 

• The Wise Woman ritual Valarie experienced with two of her Sikh friends and the meditation she offers to help you tap into your inner Wise Woman. 

• The lullaby Valarie wrote and sang for her daughter that will become a children’s book, “World of Wonder.” 

This Episode’s Challenge: 

Valarie says that the root of love is wonder and sings us a lullaby she wrote for her daughter about wonder. She encourages us to wonder about our partners, our children, our friendships, and beyond. Wondering about each other is a revolutionary process in a society that wants to shut down our ability to look at one another’s faces and say “You are a part of me I don’t yet now.” It’s so simple but it can change everything and help us birth a better world. 

Other Episodes Mentioned in this Conversation: 

• Good Life Project Podcast Interview of Valarie Kaur 

• Planting Seeds for Mother’s Quest Episode 00  

About This Episode’s Dedication By Shelly Tygielski: This is the 100th episode of the Mother’s Quest Podcast. It feels fitting to mark this occasion with a powerful conversation about Revolutionary Love with renowned civil rights leader Valarie Kaur. Valarie talks about Revolutionary Love as sweet labor and this podcast, since I launched it 7 years ago in 2016, has always been a labor of love. So too has been my form of mission-aligned sponsorship, where rather than seeking corporate sponsors, I invite one mother to dedicate each episode and to make a contribution to support Mother’s Quest. In honor of this milestone, I invited Shelly Tygielski, founder of Pandemic of Love, and an Advisory Board Member of Global Empowerment Mission to dedicate. Instead of contributing to Mother’s Quest, I made a contribution to the Global Empowerment Mission. I hope you’ll join me in celebrating this 100th episode milestone by sharing this important conversation you’re about to hear and by making a donation to the Global Empowerment Mission.

Shelly’s Dedication:

I would like to dedicate this episode of the Mother's Quest podcast to all the mothers of young, innocent children who are caught in the crossfire of war. May these children grow up in a world that is free from hate and injustice. May they be free from suffering. May they have access to opportunities and never be devoid of hopes and dreams. As the founder of Pandemic of Love and an advisory board member of Global Empowerment Mission, we are currently providing aid to Israelis and to Palestinians. When people ask us to choose a side, we say we have. We are on the side of love. Or as Valerie Kaur says it is the best, revolutionary love. So to learn more about how you can support our efforts, please visit globalempowermentmission.org. 

Donate here: 

https://www.globalempowermentmission.org/mission/israel-hamas-war/

Connect with Shelly Tygielski:

• Website | shellytygielski.com ; pandemicoflove.com ; partnersinkindproductions.com

• Instagram | @mindfulskatergirl

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C). As Mother’s Quest approaches 100 episodes, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 reviews to honor 100 episodes this Season Eight of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

This month, I was planning to record a special solocast to welcome in our 100th episode of the podcast. Instead, three days before my son Jacob’s scheduled knee surgery on July 11th, I got diagnosed with shingles. I’m recovering well and so is Jacob thankfully. But it really caused me to revisit my relationship with my body. There was a need for forgiveness all the way around, a rebuilding of trust and a recommitment to myself. In case you’re not familiar, shingles is the re-emergence of the chicken pox virus, which if you’ve ever had chicken pox lives dormant in your nerves and tends to come out later in life during a period of high stress or when your immune system is low. I should have gotten the shingles vaccine when I turned 50, around the time that I originally recorded this Dear Body episode I’m resharing with you today. Unfortunately, I had getting the vaccine in the back of my mind and never took care of it, leaving myself susceptible. 

So, if you had chickenpox as a child, are over 50 or have issues with your immune system, this is your friendly reminder and PSA to go get your shingles vaccine. For me to get shingles when I was worried about my son’s surgery felt like a betrayal from my own body and the last thing I needed. But, a few things happened that are helping me to see this as an opportunity to make meaning and change. 1) The first person I called for guidance when I got the diagnosis was Dr. Samantha Brody, a podcast guest from 2019, when she released her book Overcoming Overwhelm, who has since become a friend and advisor. When I called her, Samantha reminded me that she had had shingles and shared some about her experience. I was surprised however, when a few days after my diagnosis I put shingles in my FB search to see if there was any wisdom I might find and came upon a post from Samantha from 2018, letting people know she had shingles because she was stressed out about her book launch and needed to ask for help. Did anyone know of any podcasts where she could share about her book she wrote? In the comments, I found the tag to me and Mother’s Quest that must have brought me and Samantha together in the first place. This was a reminder to relisten to my episode with Samantha, so relevant, and trust again that sometimes the universe connects you to what you will need in the future. 2) I had several helpful therapy sessions during these weeks of recovery where I uncovered a few things. One, the incredible parallel between my own open heart surgery at the age of 10, to repair a hole in my heart, and Jacob’s knee surgery at the age of 10 to repair a hole in his knee, from a condition called osteochondritis dissecans. We realized there may be some leftover trauma from my own experience that was adding some additional stress, even if only in my subconscious. I’m now giving myself some space and grace to look back on that experience and see if there is anything that needs some extra care and healing. 

3) Finally, this whole experience has helped me acknowledge that I’m often more stressed out than I realize. Most often, I mask my stress with a smile. And I allow my nervous system to be in a perpetual state of go go go. My therapist suggested that I should take my foot off the gas more when I’m in park. I love a good metaphor. There is a lot going on in my life and sometimes I can’t relax, but I can make an effort to be in park more often and when I’m in park, really allow myself to shut down and restore. I’m clearly on a quest for this, so may work to find some special podcast guests who are experts on this topic. Stay tuned. I thought I’d invite all of us to listen to the Dear Body episode again and then also my conversation with Samantha Brody, linked in the show notes, with a fresh perspective. Is there something your body is trying to communicate to you? A “tell” as Samantha would say. What values are most important to you right now? And then how might that impact the commitment letter you write to your body? I’ll report back in the Mother’s Quest Facebook Group and would love to hear from you too! 

Wishing us all many moments of taking our foot off the gas while safely in park, good health and a restoration of trust between our body and ourselves as we close out the summer.

  Announcement for my fellow Neurodivergent Listeners:

Sign Up for “Creating Your Personal 504 Plan” Summer Workshop with Briar Harvey Heard of a 504 plan? A blueprint for how a child with a disability will have access to the accomodations and supports that will help them access their education? The truth is, a blueprint for support shouldn’t just be relegated to education and can be a model for adults as well! Friday, August 4th @ 11 am PST 2pm ET join Mother’s Quest Member, and someone who has been an amazing coach for my family, Briar Harvey, for a Summer Workshop where you’ll discover the power of creating a Personal 504 Plan that truly caters to your unique needs. Briar will walk us through the process of constructing a plan that goes beyond standard frameworks, accounting for your individual experiences and circumstances. By the end of this session, you'll have a dynamic, personalized 504 plan that empowers you to navigate life's challenges more effectively. I’m a proud affiliate and have signed me and my college son up too. Learn more about this workshop and others in her summer series here. 

More about Briar: Briar Harvey is a storyteller and systems witch. She believes that everything has a story and exists within a system. The trick then, is figuring out how to change the rules and tell a better story. She works with companies that are led by neurospicy minds (ADHD, autism, chronic depression, anxiety, all the fun stuff) or those that employ them, in order to create the systems and processes that work for them.

In her free time, she writes stuff and records podcasts. She’s the founder of The Neurodiversity Media Network, a collaborative and accessible media company that is hosting and curating all the news that is relevant to neurospicy folx.

Full Episode Show Notes

Check out the full show notes from the original episode here: https://mothersquest.com/ep-94-dear-body-reflections-on-embracing-and-embodying-50/

You can also listen to this episode:

• Ep 69: Overcoming Overwhelm with Dr. Samantha Brody 

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).As Mother’s Quest approaches 100 episodes, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 reviews to honor 100 episodes this Season Eight of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

I’m honored to share this special Father’s Day Episode featuring my very own father-in-law, David Neale. I started dating my husband Chris when I was only 19, so I realize David has been a source of inspiration and guidance in my life for over 30 years. How lucky I am to have had his example of leadership, impact, and joy for life to light my way for my entire adulthood! 

The inspiration for this episode was sparked several months ago at a big milestone birthday celebration David organized to honor his 80th year. That celebration was also the launch of a new fund he initiated through the San Jose Rotary, inspired by his experience as a grandparent to my two boys, Ryan who is autistic, and Jacob who navigates dyslexia, ADHD and dysgraphia. 

In this episode, we explore the stories and wisdom of David’s life, including his childhood in England, his move to Montreal and then San Jose, CA, his impactful work as the founder and CEO of The Core Companies, and all the thoughtful ways he shows up as a grandfather. We also talk about the Youth Empowerment Neurodiversity Fund, which Ryan and I have had the honor of helping to shape, alongside David and other Rotary committee members. 

One of David’s most significant contributions in leadership has come through his innovative thinking and outside-the-box solutions for redevelopment housing, including the creation of Art Ark, an innovative housing community for artists in San Jose, Willow Housing, a Veteran’s housing project in Menlo Park, CA that includes access to critical support services, and most recently the Agrihood in Santa Clara, CA, a unique affordable housing project that includes retail and has an Urban Farm at its center.  

His achievements are many, but as David says, his success did not happen in a straight line. His life journey was filled with plot twists, pivots, and even a few failures. Through it all, with my mother-in-law Anne by his side, he continued to believe in himself and his dreams. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did and leave inspired as I am to keep persevering through challenges, opening ourselves to new perspectives and out-of-the-box thinking, and knowing that each setback may bring us closer to all we’ve ever wanted.  

About David Neale:

David Neale is a leader and visionary in real estate development, known for his commitment to community building and for his innovative approaches to affordable housing and redevelopment. A career that began in 1978 in Montreal brought David to San Jose, CA in the 1980s and led him to found The Core Companies in 1989. As CEO of The Core Companies, David has built a vibrant company and spearheaded transformative projects that have left a lasting imprint on the communities they serve.

Notable projects Core has completed with David at the helm include Art Ark, an innovative housing community for artists in San Jose, Willow Housing, a Veteran’s housing project in Menlo Park, CA that includes access to critical support services, and most recently the Agrihood in Santa Clara, CA, a unique affordable housing project that includes retail and has an Urban Farm at its center.  

His leadership also extends into community engagement and education. David spent 16 years on the board of directors for the Silicon Valley Community Foundation and served as a founding member of the non-profit First Community Housing. His almost two decades of service on the San Jose Rotary recently led David to initiate a new Youth Empowerment Neurodiversity Fund, inspired by David’s experience with two of his grandchildren who are neurodivergent. Throughout his career, David exemplified a commitment to building projects that not only enhance the physical landscape but also uplift the lives of individuals and communities. His greatest accomplishment however is the family he has built with his wife of over 60 years, including his two children, and his four grandchildren. 

Connect with David:

• The Core Companies website 
• David’s profile on LinkedIn
• San Jose Rotary Youth Empowerment Neurodiversity Fund Link to Donate (select the specific fund from the pull-down menu)

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• David's childhood experiences in England and his mother's transition from a stay-at-home mom to small retail store business partner.
• The influence of David's father's ambition on his pursuit of independence and his adventures around the world.
• The political upheaval in Montreal during the 1970s that led David to pursue his fate and a life and career near San Jose, CA. 
• David's reflections on spending time with his grandchildren and mentoring them on life skills and overcoming challenges
• David’s individual toasts at a recent family dinner, celebrating each grandchild’s unique qualities and stages in life, one example of how he mindfully engages with them.
• David's efforts to understand and champion his neurodivergent grandsons, Ryan and Jacob, and his leadership in starting the Youth Neurodiversity Empowerment Fund through the San Jose Rotary.
• David's impactful career in building communities, particularly in affordable housing, including the creation of the artist housing project, Art Ark. Also why building housing communities requires more than just the physical structures. 
• Reflections on personal lessons learned, through many pivots and failures, and his advice for us about how to more fully live our E.P.I.C. lives. 

This Episode’s Challenge: 

David invites us to embrace the understanding that life is not a straight line. He encourages us to adapt and pivot to new circumstances, recognizing that daily adjustments may be necessary. Despite the obstacles that may arise, David urges us to never give up on pursuing our goals and to engage in activities that we truly love. By cultivating a passion for what you do, he believes that success will naturally follow. David also emphasizes the importance of asking questions and maintaining an inquisitive mindset, as continuous learning is a fundamental aspect of personal growth. As we move through our own epic life journey, David's invitation is to embrace failures as valuable lessons and to persevere with unwavering determination, knowing that each setback brings you closer to your ultimate destination.

This Episode is dedicated by: 

Jacob Neale, David’s youngest grandchild. Jacob can also be heard in the recording for last year’s Father’s Day episode with Normal Sucks author and fellow dyslexic ADHDer Jonathan Mooney. Listen to the episode here: https://mothersquest.com/different-is-not-deficient-with-normal-sucks-author-jonathan-mooney/ You Might Also Be Interested In These Father’s Day Special Episodes Here Comes the Sun: A Solocast on Death, Grief, and Love

Ep 75: A Call for Kinetic Partnership with While Black’s Darius Hicks

Ep 44: A Family Legacy of Service and Leadership with California Assemblymember Rob Bonta

Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).As Mother’s Quest approaches 100 episodes, we invite you to help us spread the word by leaving a review on Apple Podcasts. Help us reach 100 reviews to honor 100 episodes this Season Eight of the Mother’s Quest Podcast! You can also support the podcast by making a contribution or joining one of our memberships at our Patron Page on Ko-Fi.com. 

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest

In 2018, I sat down for a special Mother's Day episode with Graeme Seabrook, a life coach and maternal health advocate, affectionately known by the thousands of mothers she supported as the "Mom for Moms." We hit it off immediately, delving deep into her Motherhood Bill of Rights and my E.P.I.C. life framework, and noticing that both had become manifestos for how we wanted to live our lives while raising our children. During that episode, we co-created what we called a Manifesto Challenge, inviting other mothers to create their own. And afterward, we would reconnect in some way each May, grateful to know that the episode and the challenge could spark an opportunity for others to reclaim themselves in motherhood.

In 2021, Graeme became ill and spent the next several years in bed, visiting doctors, and coming to terms with the fact that she had somehow suffered brain damage. Along the way, she realized she would need to burn her manifesto down to the ground before creating it anew. Living and mothering through hard and sometimes life-threatening times, and now feeling a little better, she has reemerged, reframing her work in the world as a front-porch philosopher who writes about the intersection between modern motherhood and humanity.

When I read a recent blog post from Graeme and realized this would be the five-year anniversary of the Manifesto Challenge, I reached out. I asked if she felt up to recording a special episode with me, where we could interview one another, reflect on the changes and challenges in our lives, and reconnect about the power of manifestos. 

I'm so glad that Graeme said yes to my invitation and I'm honored to share this episode with you. Our hour together was more unstructured than my typical interviews, real and unfiltered, and filled with Graeme's signature blend of laughter, tears and powerful insights. I hope you'll leave this conversation, as Graeme and I both did, open to the truth that change sometimes sucks, but that there can be unexpected joys discovered along the way, and that there is always power in owning and sharing our stories.

About Graeme Seabrook :

Graeme Seabrook was once a life coach and maternal mental health advocate who supported thousands of mothers. Since becoming disabled in 2021, she has reframed her work in the world and is now a front-porch philosopher who writes about the intersection between modern motherhood and humanity. When she’s not tending her garden, knitting on her porch, or playing video games with her kids, you can find her on Instagram or on her website - graemeseabrook.com.

Connect with Graeme Seabrook:

• Website | graemeseabrook.com
• Instagram | @graemeseabrook 

Learn more about one of Graeme's unexpected joys, gardening, and how you can support her with her gardening dream here.

Topics Discussed in this Episode:

• Graeme’s experience navigating illness and disability, core experiences that have shaped her life over the last two years
• The old and negative narratives about herself that Graeme has finally learned, in her bones, are untrue 
• Author Octavia Butler’s words that have resonated for Graeme about change, and Graeme’s honest reflection that “sometimes change sucks” 
• My wishes for Mother’s Day, everything from a sauna to a million Mom manifestos 
• The recommendation from Graeme’s neurologist that resulted in a new passion, knitting, that she can do from her bed 
• My son’s knee condition, osteochondritis dissecans, a “change that sucks” and some of the unexpected joys we have discovered even in the midst of it 
• The words of wisdom Graeme has for me, a parent trying to support a child with a physical disability 
• What I’m embracing at this stage of my life 
• How Graeme’s husband and friends have shown up for her in amazing ways and what it has taught her about her own worthiness
• Graeme’s commitment to write a mini-manifesto and why it’s more than ok to make it small 
• An invitation to participate in this year’s 7 day Manifesto Challenge, a self-guided course  

Other Episodes Mentioned in this Conversation: 

• Ep 41: Reclaiming Ourselves in Motherhood ~A Mother’s Day Special~ with Graeme Seabrook https://mothersquest.com/ep41-graemeseabrook/
• Ep 94: Dear Body: Reflections on Embracing and Embodying 50 https://mothersquest.com/ep-94-dear-body-reflections-on-embracing-and-embodying-50/
• Ep 97: Reclaiming Our Time and Creativity through Fair Play in the Household with Eve Rodsky and special guest Co-host Caren Lettiere https://mothersquest.com/ep-97-reclaiming-our-time-and-creativity-through-fair-play-in-the-household-with-eve-rodsky-and-special-guest-co-host-caren-lettiere/

This Episode’s Challenge:

Are you feeling lost or trapped in motherhood? Would you like to connect with your purpose and reclaim yourself? Join us in the Mother’s Quest 7-day Manifesto Challenge and explore important questions, through a self-guided course,  that will help you create a manifesto as a guiding light. Let’s open doors together and choose ourselves in honor of Mother’s Day.. Sign up here. 

Mother's Quest May - Join Us! 

Happy Mother's Quest May! This month, we're celebrating all the incredible mothers (and those who mother!) on a quest to live an E.P.I.C. life - one that's Engaged, Purposeful, Intentional, and Connected. Mother's Day is approaching, and we want you to invest in yourself by following along as we share resources, opportunities, and inspiration.

One invitation we hope you say “yes” to is our fifth annual Mother's Quest Manifesto Challenge! Create a powerful manifesto to guide your life with our 7-day course for just $7, culminating in a live celebration on Sunday May 21st 11 am PST on Zoom.

Season Eight of the Mother's Quest podcast is also starting this month, featuring a special 5-year anniversary conversation with the manifesto challenge co-creator, Graeme Seabrook.

Join us this Mother's Quest May as we come together to support, inspire, and uplift each other on our journeys as mothers and “whole human beings” as Graeme always says. Sign up for the Mother's Quest Manifesto Challenge, join the Mother’s Quest email list and become a member of the MQ Facebook group. Invest in yourself this Mother's Day!

Mother's Quest May Gift Guide 

Find a gift for yourself or a Mom you love! One day, Mother's Day, isn't enough, so this Gift Guide should be a source for inspiration all month long. See the specially curated items here. 

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Mother’s Quest is a podcast for moms who are ready to live a truly E.P.I.C. life.

Join in for intimate conversations with a diverse group of inspiring mothers as they share how they are living an E.P.I.C. life, Engaging mindfully with their children (E), Passionately and Purposefully making a difference beyond their family (P), Investing in themselves (I), and Connecting to a strong support network (C).

Join our community of mothers to light the way and sustain you on your quest at www.facebook.com/groups/mothersquest