My Abuse Diary

If abuse is so bad, why do the victims stay in those relationships? In today's episode, I talk about my own personal reasons for staying, and why it was such a hard decision to leave. I also talk about the anger I feel for having to make that decision, along with all the consequences that come with it.

Understanding your past helps you move forward in a positive direction. In this episode I share a homework assignment from my therapist to identify pivotal points in my past relationships.

Seriously, what are boundaries? I talk about my confusion with them and why they are so important to understand and practice now, as a survivor of abuse trying to put my life back together and rebuild relationships.

One of the most heartbreaking things about abuse is how skilled abusers are in applying their tactics without the awareness of their targets. In this episode, I give a name to all of the tactics my ex-partner would use so that I can recognize them and understand their effects on me.

Today's show is more like a vent session. I talk about the emotional rollercoaster ride I've been on since separating from my abuser, ranging from guilt and anger, to sadness and fear.

Even after our abuser harms us, we may still hold out hope that they will change. In today's episode I talk about my own hope for change, what that change would look like, and what I'm risking if I give in too much to that hope.

We tell ourselves it's not abuse, because it doesn't fit into our idea of what abuse really is. Today I talk about my own struggle with accepting the fact that all of the abuse I experienced was real, and it had serious impacts on my life.