My Brain’s Not Broken (Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD)

By: Tamara Rosier, PhD

“Where’s my phone?”

“ What did I do with my keys?”

“Was that due today?”

“ Wow! That took a lot longer than I thought it would!”

“Where did the time go?”

“I am sooooooo tired.”

This author has ADHD along with 3 of her 4 kids and her husband, so the girl knows well the crazy unpredictable journey that many of us fellow- strugglers are on which may be a bit of a challenge for our neuro-typical friends to understand.

ADHD has many faces along with many misconceptions. The author has her clients come up with metaphors to express their ADHD. Some were like Lucille Ball at the candy factory (where Ethyl and Lucy are trying to wrap the candy coming on the conveyor belt but simply cannot keep up) , dirty babies (even after washing, they’re dirty again), elves moving things around, monsters of many shapes, sizes, and strengths. 

Although very different, most ADHD peeps are passionate, strong-willed, extra extra curious with possibility brains. Most struggle with being patient, completing mundane monotonous tasks, and balancing time (time blindness is a real thing). Usually ADHD folks veer toward divergent creative thinking instead of convergent. 

The author’s daughter described her ADHD as being a misfit toy from the classic Rudolph the Rednosed Reindeer cartoon that had a part on  the Island of Misfit Toys. Many think ADHD is a struggle that only affects kids that cannot pay attention. In fact, Many adults are affected and many are hyper focused (completely immersed in whatever intrigues them).

Her suggestions to help navigate successfully include, The Solve-It Grid.

Set a  timer for 20 minutes to complete mundane tasks (homework, housework, paying bills, proofreading…) in increments when working in the yellow quadrant. (Gradually depletes battery)

When the yellow tasks pile up and turn urgent, they turn red! (Kinda like cooking on high heat).

Stressful fight, flight, or freeze becomes the choices in this quadrant which is exhausting and can cause burn-out. Red quadrant may feel energizing but spending too much time here quickly depletes our batteries.

Blue quadrant is our comfort zone default, it’s as hard to get out of as the Molasses Swamp in Candyland.(playing games on our phones, binge watching shows, scrolling Twitter…) We need some time in the blue quadrant but like everything else balance is a challenge. Blue time slowly recharges but too much sends us into the red quadrant (because of things in the yellow quadrant left undone). 

Green is the Happy Place quadrant, it is where we are reminded of what we value. This is the fastest way to be rested, restored, and recentered. The Green requires little (having a meal with family, going for a walk, watching a sunset…) but gives much. Some avoid this quadrant thinking they are too tired but in reality, green gives the most energy!

“He who fears he shall suffer, already suffers what he fears.”

Michel de Montaigne

Don’t fear the unknown or assume you know all there is to know about ADHD. Let’s embrace strategies as we strive to conquer our quest for balance and help others do likewise.