My Great Aunt EDNA: The Golden Girl of Leadership

For those who know me personally, you know I am a private pilot. I fly. I like heights and the beauty of the earth from the viewpoint of the sky. It is a majestic feeling to soar, have control of your aircraft, and view the heavens and the earth simultaneously. I have met a brother who does the opposite. He dives; very deep. He dives in oceans and views the majesty of the earth from under deep waters, and has explained to me a similar feeling of euphoria.

He is also a leader in his field, which is why My Great Aunt EDNA had to speak with him. Meet Jay Haigler, the scientific scuba diver and leader of an organization known as Diving With a Purpose. Shout out to our brother Dell Warren for making the connection. CLICK PLAY TO LISTEN TO MY CONVERSATION WITH JAY HAIGLER ABOUT LEADERSHIP, PURPOSE, AND DIVING. #mygreatauntedna #auntedna #leadership #leadershipdevelopment #leadership #excellence #dointthingstherightway #noshortcuts #accountability #author #books #podcast #macmcneil #My_Great_Aunt_EDNA #MacMcNeil

Is there a line in heaven for those who choose to be born an orphan? I am assuming that line would not exist, even if there were a desk for this category (I am picturing the Division of Motor Vehicles in my mind). As Grace Yung Foster told me during our leadership discussion pertaining to her lived experience of being an adoptee, then abandoned after adoption, resulting in the rest of her childhood being in foster care, being born an orphan means that you are literally born an outsider belonging nowhere. But Grace has overcome the beginning of her existence to become a leader in working with adoptees, foster children, and organizations to better maximize the full human potential.

#mygreatauntedna #auntedna #leadership #leadershipdevelopment #leadership #excellence #dointthingstherightway #noshortcuts #accountability #author #books #books #podcast #macmcneil #youtube #youtubevideo #My_Great_Aunt_EDNA #MacMcNeil #leadership help #leadership_helping_others_to_succeed_quotes

Several studies have shown that creativity is much more prevalent in dreams than in actual life. Why, you ask? It is because the portion of the brain that manages logic and reason is largely restrained during the first 3 hours of sleep. This restraint of logic permits the free association connectivity of memories and ideas in a way that can produce novel combinations. The key to this being a benefit for your personal, leadership, or business life is the point at which you wake up in your sleep progression. I now automatically wake up after 3 hours, which allows me to vividly remember the novel combinations that were in my dreams. Typically, after the first 3 hours of sleep, it is harder for one to remember the vivid details of dreams if one sleeps a full 6 - 8 hours consecutively.

Rarely do you ever hear of a black female leading technology as a senior level executive for a major organization. Even more rare is learning that other C-suite executives seek her out to improve their overall performance, career plans, and general psychological well-being. Trina L. Hill, MBA, PMP, CBCP, CSM, ACC is rare, and she's a force on the move. I was blessed to have her state that she is a fan of the My Great Aunt EDNA leadership platform, and even more blessed to have her as a guest on the show to discuss her leadership philosophies she shares with other executives.

After years of leading very complex technology strategies at large-scale, Trina is now sharing her talents and lessons. You'll want to get in on this movement.

One monkey, two monkeys, three monkeys, four

On my back I can feel I have monkeys galore

But when I look back only one monkey's found

This troublesome monkey's been moving around

In leadership, we often feel that we have several "monkeys on our backs," causing us stress related to trying to figure out how to get them off. However, when you actually reach for them, there are usually far fewer "monkeys" than what was first assumed.

As a leader, how do you plan to lead in a political Cold War? It does impact your team. Whether you openly admit, think about, or consider this to be true, the impacts to your success as a leader may depend on your ability to manage the variables and variance of team dynamics impacted by Election PTSD.

Is it really over? Is this the end? Has the summation of all events been concluded at this distinct point of reality? Only if you say so.

Fascinating is the hidden wisdom in language and words. The slight manipulation of letters can reveal lessons of life that can help one be motivated or demotivated. You choose.

THE END sounds finite. But isn’t there always a sequel? Take the “E” off THE and the “D” off END. What is left? TH…EN. THEN is the story you get to write after THE END.

I like to think of the “E” and “D” as messages as well. Could they be representation of Expected Disappointments that you take off THE END? Could they represent Everyone’s Doubt? Or could they represent Euphoric Dissolution? I am sure that you can easily define what the “E” and “D” mean for you.

THEN can be better or worse than THE END. As leaders, we can influence THEN for our teams and ourselves. How, might you ask? My Great Aunt EDNA teaches that Excellence, Doing Things The Right Way, No Shortcuts, and Accountability can influence what happens after THE END.

As an example, a failed business endeavor can be THE END for some leaders, but it can also lead to, THEN I decided to listen to other’s advice, because I left off Egocentric Decision-making.

A successful THE END to a construction project can become, THEN we decided to scale even larger because we left off Eensy-weensy Dreaming.

So, for you and your teams, is it really THE END? Likely not. THEN, what are you going to do about it?

From humble beginnings in the Bronx, NY as the child of a single black woman, to becoming the only Black woman to ever fly the U-2 Spy Plane for the United States Air Force at 70,000 feet, Ret. Colonel Merryl Tengesdal has never had a problem of directly owning the spirit of the woman she was intended to be! As an inductee into the Women in Aviation International Pioneer Hall of Fame, Merryl has applied her love for science, math, and the Spirit of Excellence adopted by My Great Aunt EDNA to soar to heights only known to a few.

Click below to watch or listen to the Season 2 kickoff of the acclaimed My Great Aunt EDNA Leadership Podcast by Mac McNeil with special guest, Ret. Col Merryl Tengesdal!

Assets - Liabilities = Net Worth. That was one of the first equations that I learned in accounting many years ago. It is a very simple and direct equation to commit to memory, but somehow we fail to consider the equation void of numerical ramifications.

Assets are items of value that we possess due to acquisition or wealth transfer. Assets can be physical, intellectual, or even "realized," meaning that we recognize the value of something that others may not in a traditional sense. One common realized asset is emotional possession acquired via acquisition or transference.

Anger can be a catalyst for acquisition. Anger can also be a catalyst for liabilities. Liabilities can be defined as short or long-term debt, or something that we owe a value to another.

If you've been in leadership for any length of time, you understand that anger is a common emotion that is expressed or internalized very frequently. Some would argue anger has no place in organizational leadership, but I beg to differ. It is the expression of anger that can be a problem, not anger itself.

Let us think in terms of assets created by anger. Anger can cause one to build resilience, eliminate procrastination, encourage learning and knowledge acquisition, learn a new skill, geographically relocate, enter a new industry, or even forge new relationships. As a catalyst, anger can be one of the strongest emotions that we possess to create assets of value. My Great Aunt EDNA once told me that besides love, anger can be attributed to creating some of the most beautiful outcomes. She also stated that one's purpose is often found in the one thing that provides you with the greatest anger. It is that, in which you were born to solve.

Inversely, anger can also be a catalyst for liabilities. Liabilities are typically created by anger in the lack of controlled expression. Do you control your anger, or are you controlled by anger? The variance in outcomes can be drastic if one cannot control their anger.

Let us think in terms of liabilities caused by anger. Anger can cause personal image damage, communication barriers, job loss, financial distress, legal entanglements, damaged relationships, and even death. Since liabilities are debt, can these liabilities be paid off and neutralized? Some can, and others are finite.

Anger as an emotion expressed in leadership can get an unfair label at times. In a fairy tale version of leadership, the leader is always happy, wise, and free of stress. Can I call bullshit on this one? The real version of leadership is laced with pride, happiness, stress, accomplishment, intuition, learning, intellect, and yes, anger. Real leadership, has moments of real anger.

The real trick is creating a positive net worth as a result of the anger. The assets you gain from anger must surpass your liabilities caused by your anger. This effort, a word used intentionally, requires a conscious cognitive awareness of your anger, and the ability to channel your anger into positive outcomes. This will not be a 100% occurrence, as anger is not 100% controllable in the human experience. But this does not mean that anger cannot be dominated in most instances.

Find an immediate outlet for your anger. For some leaders, writing is an immediate outlet. For others, exercise is an immediate outlet. Others depend on talking to a mentor, reading literature, meditating, or other diversions that force a redirection of the energy created by anger. The worst case scenario is for a leader to not have an immediate plan for an outlet, and allowing the anger to replay the scenarios in a looping pattern. The results are then typically on the liability side of the net worth equation.

Emotional Quotient (EQ), or Emotional Intelligence for the everyday usage, is formally defined as the ability to understand, use, and manage your emotions in positive ways. It has been a very hot topic in leadership circles for the last decade, or so. Although the definition specifically calls out one's own understanding of one's own emotions, the definition has evolved to include a leader's ability to understand the individual and aggregate emotions of their team, in real-time, to drive organizational success.

Leaders naturally desire all of their team members to be happy while performing tasks and to be happy about the overall vision of the organization. This is not a realistic expectation to have the entire team happy, but it is one that is discussed in senior leadership meetings. "How can we communicate the vision of the organization in a manner in which it is positively adopted by the team?" "How can we change the culture of our organization to one that makes the team happy to come to work everyday?"

Sadly, the American culture in particular, has become one ingrained in cynicism, doubt, and unhappiness. Don't believe me? I challenge you to ask 10 people about the first three daily tasks they perform everyday. For many, one of those tasks include looking at their phones for messages and social media posts that have already been influenced by algorithms that display messages they really only want to see in the first place. Or, they watch or read news, which is no longer an honest and objective method for obtaining information. Most people are unhappy before they even login into their computers or leave their homes for work.

My blood type is B+, and I have always considered that a sign from God that being positive is my natural disposition I operate in most days. However, being happy around unhappy people can cause conflict. And in leadership, being happy can seem superficial, unnatural, and a bit suspect to many.

So, am I offering a solution that a leader should be unhappy? Of course not! Absolutely not! I am not offering a solution at all. In fact, the purpose of this communication is simply to remind leaders that as you dive into your emotional intelligence bag to create strategies to move your teams forward, do so with the understanding that some people are just happy being unhappy, and there is not much you can do to change their disposition.

The ability to lead multiple personality types and behavioral dispositions is usually the hardest challenge for new leaders, and also the reason why some choose to avoid leadership by any means necessary. Excellence requires a cohesive unit moving in the same direction, but contrary to popular belief, not all of the individual pieces of the unit need to be happy about the direction the team is moving. One can be unhappy, yet effective, and as leaders, we should be happy about that.