Oh god. Oh god here it is. I can’t believe we did this. It’s My Little Pony ‘n Friends. Not the modern incarnation either. No, this is the original from 1986. Bright, colorful, and utterly nonsensical, My Little Pony combined terrible story lines with even worse musical numbers. This show was a perfect storm of potential that ended up dead on arrival. It’s a shame. I hope we can help you through the pain. I know we’re still recovering.

Lo, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no pony, for thou art with me.