# Divorce does not only impact the couple who find themselves having  to take it as the only option, it affects the children too.

#Psychological effects

#Emotional impact 

#Open communication: age appropriate 

#Family dynamics 

#Maintain structure; routine

#Shared parenting

#child-appropriate coping strategies 

#Empathy

#Avoid bad-mouthing the other parent

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Answer :  Yes OR No?

DO YOU CONSIDER ANY OF THESE CHEATING?

When you are married or in a relationship and find your partner to be doing the following, will you consider that cheating; does such behaviour qualify as cheating?

 | BEHAVIOUR/ACTION STATEMENT |  YES | NO

 | 1.Texting someone else of the opposite sex secretly. | Yes/No

 | 2. Hiding browsing history from partner | Yes/No

 | 3. Secretly Watching Pornography | Yes/No

 | 4. Masturbating | Yes/No

 | 5. Giving special attention to someone else | 
 Yea/No

 | 6. Putting a password on the phone and refusing to share it with partner | Yes/No

 | 7. Regularly communicating with ex-partner, constantly talking about Ex | Yes/No

 | 8. Adding attractive strangers on social media to friend list. | Yes/No

 | 9. Flirting with someone and giving them  mobile number. | Yes/No

 | 10. Hiding messages (in the phone back office) or deleting text for partner not to see. | 
Yes/No

Total 🟰       ?

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#Divorce.        #Children

#impact.           #effects

#psychological.     #Mental.    #Behavioural

#Financial.           #Anxiety.        #Fear

#Anger.                 #Emotional Distress

#Substance use

#We are also on Apple podcast and you can watch us on YouTube shorts 

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#betrayal induced trauma 

#trauma caused by feeling betrayed 

#Intimate partner betrayal/romantic partner betrayal 

#Institutional betrayal  

#Interpersonal betrayal 

#effects

#betrayal blindness

#Betrayal denial 

#unconscious blocking

#choices

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Free Anger Management Certification Training for Clinicians Click here and Register: 👇🏽

https://my.pesi.partners/554NQCR/2MCF14N/

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#Core beliefs

#challenge negative core beliefs 

#negative core beliefs

#negative core beliefs fuel your low self~esteem

#Low self-esteem

#perceptions

#self-concept

#Self-interpretation

#self-talk

#generalization tendencies e.g “Everybody hates me”, “nobody likes me” etc. Really ? Everybody in this whole world hates you?  Is that really true? Is it realistic? Is it possible for an individual to be  liked or loved by everyone?

“Am not good at anything”, how true is that? What could be the opposite of that?  Do you honestly believe  that  there isn’t a single thing you have the ability to do?  how did you reach that conclusion, and how did you learn that? 

REMEMBER: #every learnt negative core belief can be unlearned 

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This was produced as a video, but also uploaded on this podcast as an audio.

#PROS: of Substance use; whether Opioids, Stimulants, Depressants, hallucinogens or others. What are  the good things about using them;  e.g cannabis, meth, alcohol, Ecstasy, Crack Cocaine, etc

#CONS  of Substance use; what is not so good  about using substances e.g what’s not awesome about cannabis/marijuana, Methcathinone /Cathinone, methamphetamine  use ? 

#PROS  of  change ; the good things about stopping substance use, the benefits or advantages of not using the substance.

#CONS:  the not so good things about stopping use of the substance; what’s not awesome  about not using the substance?

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#SUD : substance use disorders are a global concern

#Stigma may prevent people with substance used disorders from seeking help

#It is often difficult to get parents/caregivers to know how to initiate discussions with their loved ones

#Often parent’s emotions interfere with the ability to show empathy and support their children living with SUD

#No one  intentionally develops dependency on alcohol, marijuana or any other substance/drug

#Its important to use non-labeling, non-stigmatizing words 

#Setting boundaries clarifies where you stand on drugs

#Substance use impacts family systems and often members find themselves trying to cope by functioning in different roles of either becoming:

-  Enabler, 

- Hero, 

- Scapegoat 

- Lost Child

- Mascot

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Worrying about the past , present or future will not alter the situation; but may very well alter your mental health and physical well-being. 

“there is no health without mental health” - Stop worrying, it solves nothing.

# Physiological responses to worry

#Emotionally caused diseases

#Psychosomatic ailments; Diseases, sicknesses, illness.

# Diabetes, Rheumatism, Arthritis, heart conditions, elevated blood pressure, skin disorders etc 

# Notice when you are in a  worry drive; is it about the past? What will dwelling on it change?, can it delete, erase or change your past, your present or your future.

Avoid focusing on closed doors of your past; you’ll miss open doors of your present and future ( Wyllie,T.M, 2024; Botshelo, T,M, 2014). 

# Develop healthy coping strategies

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#Fascinating book by Dale Carnegie:”How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”. It’s worth reading. Try it!

-  Is your job weighing you down?.

   If you were to change jobs what will you change  into?.

     What are the challenges of transitioning from what you are doing now to the option you may be considering?.

     Do you have what it takes?.

     What has to happen for the change to take place?.

      Do you have the passion, talent, skills and additional competencies to find a niche there?.

      We are still reading the book by Dale Carnegie: "How to Stop Worrying and Start Living".

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We continue reading Dale Carnegie’s book: “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living”. 

#worry is counter productive

#does your worrying change the situation?

#whats the worst that could possibly happen?

#as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he”

#you are what you think

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