New Release

This week on New Release … thirst traps Ashley and Drew (where’s Derrick?) develop a taste for something sick and sticky sweet—no, we’re not talking about Canadian maple syrup. With Rabid, bastion of body horror David Cronenberg places a blood-sucking protuberance in the unlikeliest of places—just you wait! Part zombie / part pandemic / part revenge flick, there’s a lot of meat to suck off this hambone. It won’t always make sense and the character motives are murky at best, but there’s a certain DIY charm to this transformative tale. Come for the flesh eating, stay for the attempts at female empowerment, and get your fill of steak sandwiches along the way. If you wanna be sure you never look at armpits the same way, then search ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.

*w/ Special Guest Jamie!* This week on New Release … pencil nuts Ashley, Derrick, Drew, and James galavant around a polluted, nightmarish hellscape meticulously crafted by David Lynch in his feature debut. Eraserhead is dark and twisted and uncompromising in its vision, whatever that may be, to whomever may consume it. It’s art that uses a stark imagery and persistent sound to overwhelm the senses until you can’t help but submit to its will. You’ll laugh nervously, cover your eyes, and gag, at times, at the audacity of what you’re watching. Sound like fun? Regardless of whether you ‘enjoy’ it or not, you will be moved. If you’re down for a visceral, full-body experience, then search ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe. We go hard.

This week on New Release … hipcats Ashley, Derrick, and Drew shake their groove things back to a funkadelic decade they never got to experience first hand. High time to hit the late 70s, ya dig? And what better way to kick off a new semester of New Release than by previewing the MONUMENTAL and weird films that came out during this Spring of of ‘77 season. Starting with an industrial nightmare drama from the twisted mind of Drew’s favorite director, then moving onto something set a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away (hmmm), and finally, the stache that launched a thousand waterbeds into perpetual motion. We’ll also catch up with some must-see 2022 content while waiting to arrive at our final destination. Grab an express ticket to funkytown by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.

This week on New Release … student bodies Ashley, Derrick, and Drew blast into outer space with their old friend Jason Voorhees. This tenth installment in the historic Friday the 13th franchise may very well be the sexiest, bloodiest, and certainly the dumbest Jason movie to date. Speaking of dates, this movie takes place 455 years in the future—for some reason—creating a true Sci-Fi-Slasher-Skinemax hybrid. And even though the sex in this flick errs on the softcore side, the violence is always a hard R. As is tradition, we recount EVERY KILL performed by the lumpy man in the hockey mask … then we rank those brother suckers! Don’t miss a beat, by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.

This week on New Release … home invaders Ashley, Derrick, and Drew are busting open a modern masterpiece and mining it for cinematic gold. What a dazzling display of camera work, performance, and taut screenwriting to be had in David Fincher’s thriller Panic Room. Jodie Foster fights for her life AND the life of her daughter, played by a plunky newcomer Kristen Stewart—K-Stew for short. Will this mother-daughter duo outwit the terrible tandem of nutbags trying so desperately to flush them out of the safest, most secure place in their new house? On the first night?! Furthermore, would having your own panic room ultimately cause more stress and paranoia than peace of mind? Find out what we think by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe. The early aughts are back ;)

*Holy shit!* 100 weeks straight of putting out a new episode of New Release and somehow it feels like we’re just getting started. On this very special episode … OGs Ashley, Derrick, and Drew go places and do things never before heard on this intergalactic, multi-planetary audio program. We share our ‘Top 5 Movies that Made Us Love Movies’ lists. Followed by a rousing game of ‘Name that New Release Moment’. You like ‘Rank the Blank’? Then you’ll love hearing us rank the Rank the Blanks. All capped off by the most epic, heartfelt, but not without its dick-jokes Poetry Corner by Ashley. An occasion for the ages but maybe not all ages. Don’t fret, it’s never too late to shrink us down and put us in your ear holes by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.

This week on New Release … button mashers Ashley, Derrick, and Drew take on the most anticipated video game adaptation since Mortal Kombat. Will the tension and horror of Resident Evil the game translate to the big screen or fall flat like a zombie with its head cut off? Milla Jovovich and Michelle Rodriguez bring their action A-games to what isn’t considered an A-list movie by many people. But that’s never stopped us from having a lively chat about something we surely loved when we were younger. Speaking of lively, stick around to the end to find out what horrible fate Derrick suffers this week. As always, I implore you to search ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.

This week on New Release … bloodsuckers Derrick, Drew, and super returning guest Jamie break out their finest leathers for a sick night out at the movies. We’re here for Aaliyah as ‘Queen of the Damned’ and as ‘Mother of All Vampires’ and harbinger of ‘Hell on Earth’. Bring it on, we say. What happens when a flamboyant vampire decides to step out of the shadows and announce themselves as a hardcore rock star at the Death Valley music fest? All whole bunch of fang-filled Wah-Wah-Wah action is Wha-t. We promise you’ll have at least as much fun listening to us pour over QotD as you would watching it. Follow along for one sweet 2002 joint after another by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple and slaying that ‘sub’ button.

This week on New Release … spring chickens Ashley, Derrick, and Drew say goodbye to 1999 and howdy-doody to 2002. What a time to be alive. Our high school experience kicks into overdrive as we choose a NR Teen Movie Award winner and reveal the next five movies we’ll be slaying on the podcast. I hope you like early aughts special effects, alt rock soundtracks, and lots of people in leather. Giddy up. Things are about to get real personal up in here as we relive the most awkward time in our lives and a truly odd time for cinema. Yes, I’m calling Resident Evil the movie ‘cinema’. Come at me. Also please subscribe by searching ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple.

This week on New Release … schemers Ashley, Derrick, and Drew follow the exploits of a few bad kids in the big apple with too much hormone on their hands. Cruel Intentions answers the question of what happens when you take the hottest teen ‘throbs of the late 90s and have them engage in hard drugs and light incest. Gellar, Phillippe, Witherspoon, and more find themselves entangled in a twisted game of who can screw who in how many different ways, metaphorically speaking … or not. What’s it’s like to watch a movie that made you feel all grown up inside when you were younger as an actual grown up? Well, that’s what we’re here to find out. If you like adult language and bad boy themes, then search ‘New Release’ on Spotify or Apple to subscribe.