We’re on baby watch at News Weakly HQ! Two weeks off incoming—don’t unsubscribe! I’ll be back once I’ve defeated a boss-level nappy.

Also: I’m doing a one-night-only 20th anniversary stand-up show:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13 Nov, 6:30pm — Comedy Republic (Melbourne)

Patreon members get a discount code (see the pinned post at patreon.com/samishah). Otherwise, tickets via comedyrepublic.com.au.

• Ceasedfire, News Now…
• Israel and Hamas sign onto Phase One of “The Comprehensive End to the Gaza War”: hostages (living and deceased) returned, prisoner releases, and an IDF pullback to the “yellow line.” Trump promises a pyramid-side signing ceremony, because of course he does. Netanyahhu’s far-right partners rage; Gaza readies aid corridors; everyone reads the fine print with a magnifying glass and a migraine.
• “A Piece Prize”
• Nobel Peace Prize goes to Venezuelan democrat María Corina Machado. The Trump White House responds with “politics over peace” energy; Trump congratulates Machado while implying the medal would look better on his mantelpiece.
• The Ballad of David Pocock
• Kicked out (then re-invited) to the Australian Parliament Sports Club after asking why a gambling lobby is a sponsor. PM—who’s listed as club president—says everyone should be welcome. Pocock’s holding out for transparency; Canberra discovers “conflict of interest” isn’t just a footy penalty.
• Brides, Bombs & Bureaucracy
• “ISIS brides” and children returned to Australia without formal repatriation—Home Affairs knew for months; two children granted citizenship by descent. Government says “we didn’t help,” which is interesting given how many forms got stamped. Opposition reaches for the Temporary Exclusion Orders talking point; AFP preps for more “self-managed returns.”
• Artificial (and Financial) Intelligence
• Deloitte refunds part of a $440k report after AI-generated howlers (fake cases, phantom sources). Senate calls it a “human intelligence problem”; consultants reassure us they’d never, ever do that (again).
• French Kisses Goodbye
• France clocks five prime ministers in two years. Latest: Sébastien Lecornu quits 14 hours after launching his cabinet. Macron’s minority arithmetic meets Parisian patience: both collapse spectacularly.
• No Wi-Fi, No Worries
• Taliban filters throttle social media in Afghanistan; videos stop loading, women lose a key lifeline. It’s the world’s harshest digital detox: great for screen-time stats, catastrophic for rights.

“Peace isn’t a miracle, it’s a temporary pause between tragedies.”

• Keep News Weakly healthy: patreon.com/samishah
• One-night-only stand-up special (13 Nov): comedyrepublic.com.au
• Share the episode, leave a review, and tell a friend who argues in comment sections for sport.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music “Historic Anticipation” by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Two years after October 7th, the world still argues in absolutes.

Pro-Israel voices call it a war for survival.

Pro-Palestine voices call it resistance against colonialism.

And somewhere between the slogans and the hashtags, the dead keep multiplying.

In this News Weakly special, Sami Shah steps back from the noise and looks at the long view — drawing lessons from the Thirty Years’ War, Northern Ireland, and moments of fragile hope in Israeli and Palestinian history.

From Westphalia to Belfast, from Gaza to Melbourne, this episode explores what centuries of conflict teach us about exhaustion, reconciliation, and how peace survives when certainty doesn’t.

• The Thirty Years’ War — how Europe learned that faith without restraint leads to ruin
• The Troubles — how Ireland turned fatigue into peace
• The Children of October 7 — what two years of war are teaching a new generation
• Australia’s role — how to keep our empathy from collapsing into imported hate
• Glimpses of the impossible — moments when Israelis and Palestinians found shared humanity against the odds
• 
  

Help keep News Weakly independent and ad-free by joining at

👉 patreon.com/samishah

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: thesamishah.com

Theme music ‘Historic Anticipation’ by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi everyone, This year marks my twenty years in comedy, and to celebrate I’m doing a one-off, one-time-only anniversary comedy show called:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13th November, 6:30pm

Comedy Republic Theatre, Melbourne

It’s twenty years of stand-up crammed into one night—a greatest hits, a worst-of, and some brand new material, all about surviving two decades of comedy, hecklers, pandemics, marriages, divorces, and jokes that should have stayed in the notebook.

Tickets are just $25. But if you’re a member at patreon.com/samishah, you’ll get a special discount code, plus that smug glow of knowing you’re keeping this podcast alive and healthy!

• In Manchester, a synagogue attack on Yom Kippur leaves two dead and reignites debates about solidarity, antisemitism, and the perils of bad baby naming.
• Donald Trump’s Gaza ceasefire plan turns out to be less peace deal, more investor pitch, complete with a “Board of Peace” chaired by Tony Blair.
• At Quantico, Trump and Pete Hegseth summon America’s generals for a loyalty test that felt alarmingly like Saddam-lite stagecraft.
• Greta Thunberg is detained after joining a flotilla trying to break the Gaza blockade, proving she’s still willing to put her boat where her mouth is.
• Saudi Arabia launches the Riyadh Comedy Festival, featuring world-class comedians and world-class hypocrisy.
• In Australia, Optus blames “human error” for a 000 outage while its parent company Singtel keeps racking up billions without paying tax.
• 
  

Quote of the Week:

“When a government points a broad sword inward, it can’t help but cut too deep."

Support the Show

Want to enjoy News Weakly ad-free? Head over to patreon.com/samishah. Your support keeps the podcast alive, independent, and fuelled by sarcasm.

Credits

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram.

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hi everyone, This year marks my twenty years in comedy, and to celebrate I’m doing a one-off, one-time-only anniversary comedy show called:

You'd Think After 20 Years I'd Be Better At This

13th November, 6:30pm

Comedy Republic Theatre, Melbourne

It’s twenty years of stand-up crammed into one night—a greatest hits, a worst-of, and some brand new material, all about surviving two decades of comedy, hecklers, pandemics, marriages, divorces, and jokes that should have stayed in the notebook.

Tickets are just $25. But if you’re a member at patreon.com/samishah, you’ll get a special discount code, plus that smug glow of knowing you’re keeping this podcast alive and healthy!

So, if you want cheaper tickets and better karma, sign up to Patreon. Otherwise, grab your tickets now, because once this show’s done, it’s done.

• UN Turns 80, Still Doesn’t Look a Day Over Irrelevant!
• Pakistan Offers Saudi Arabia a Bomb Shelter, with Actual Bombs!
• Andrew Hastie Says Cut Immigration or the Liberals Die, Which Honestly Sounds Like a Win-Win!

All that, and just a little bit more, on NEWS WEAKLY!

“Optus is the only telco where ‘Can you hear me now?’ is a philosophical question.”

Keep News Weakly independent and ad-free by joining Patreon: patreon.com/samishah

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music 'Historic Anticipation' by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sami Shah’s 20th anniversary stand-up show You’d Think After 20 Years I’d Be Better At This is happening on Thursday 13 November, 6:30pm at Comedy Republic, Melbourne. Tickets are $25—but Patreon members get a special discount code. Join at patreon.com/samishah for cheaper tickets and better karma.

U-TURN ON TURNING POINT!

Charlie Kirk gets shot, mourned, memed, and immediately turned into a martyr—because in America, tragedy is always a prelude to propaganda.

DISCORD ON DISCORD!

Gen Z in Nepal just toppled their Prime Minister using Discord. Forget bad anime avatars—this server brought down a government.

NET ZERO TIMES NET ZERO EQUALS NOT ZERO!

Australia’s shiny new 2035 climate targets are “ambitious yet achievable”—which is also what I say about finishing a pack of TimTams and a bottle of wine in one sitting.

Plus: Gaza burns, Sudan starves, and the world still manages to look the other way.

“Because people on the Left weren’t sad enough about Charlie Kirk’s death, she’s going to vote for One Nation. That’s like cancelling your Disney Plus account because the cashier at Woolies didn’t tear up when Matthew Perry died.”

Keep News Weakly ad-free and alive by joining the Patreon: patreon.com/samishah. Members get bonus content, book reviews, and discount codes for live shows.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Link to the 20th Anniversary live show tickets:

https://www.comedyrepublic.com.au/event/38:520/38:1821/

Thursday 13 November, 6:30pm

Twenty years. That’s how long it’s been since Sami Shah first stepped on stage, told a joke, and thought, “This’ll be easy.”

Two decades later, he's got the stories, and the heckler scars to prove otherwise. In that time, comedy’s changed, the world’s changed, and he's changed. None for the better.

This 20th anniversary show is a greatest hits, a worst-of, and a brand-new set all rolled into one. It’s about survival: surviving bad gigs, hostile audiences, global pandemics, marriage(s), divorce(s), and jokes that should never have made it out of the notebook.

Expect sharp new material, ancient callbacks, and the kind of honesty that only comes from being too tired to lie anymore.

Two decades of stand-up. Zero chance Sami's stopping now.

• $25.00
• 13 November 2025
• 60 minutes
• 18:30
• Comedy Republic Theatre

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

NEWS WEAKLY 178 – 6th September, 2025

TOP STORIES OF THE WEEK

Wannabe Dictator Dan!

Also, why read a literary journal when you can watch a TikTok instead!

All that, and more, on News Weakly!

Quote of the Week

“The government says this is to help public servants be more ‘frank.’ Which is true, they’ll be frank, because every document will now say: ‘Frankly, fuck off.’”

Support the Show

Did you know you can support News Weakly by giving it a 5-star rating and review in your podcast app? Or better yet, join my Patreon at patreon.com/samishah for ad-free episodes, full scripts as newsletters, free short stories, and updates on upcoming shows. Keep the satire free-range and cruelty-free!

CREDITS

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

NEWS WEAKLY 177 – 2nd Sept 2025

TOP STORY OF THE WEEK

March of the Meatheads!

Also, NOM NOM NOM!

And, Katter Does Jefferson!

All that, and more, on News Weakly.

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“So no, it’s not an invasion—it’s just registered nurses, accountants, and software engineers. If that’s your idea of a hostile takeover, then your enemy is Excel spreadsheets.”

SUPPORT THE SHOW

Keep News Weakly ad-free and independent by joining my Patreon: patreon.com/samishah

CREDITS

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

NEWS WEAKLY 176 – 30TH AUG 2025

TOP STORIES OF THE WEEK

From Tehran With Hate!

Also, Sovereign? More like SoveRUN! Amirite!

And, Things go sideways in Nauru!

All that and more on News Weakly!

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“Just because Israel’s committing genocide in Gaza doesn’t make Iran freedom fighters. Pretending otherwise is like cheering for the Hindenburg because you hate planes.”

SUPPORT THE SHOW

Hi, did you know you can support News Weakly by giving it a 5-star rating and review in the Podcast app? You can also join my Patreon, where you’ll find ad-free episodes, scripts in newsletter form, plus free short stories and updates. Support free-range, cruelty-free news satire at: patreon.com/samishah.

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music Historic Anticipation by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

NEWS WEAKLY 175 – 23rd August, 2025

TOP STORIES OF THE WEEK

Bibi bullies Albo!

And, Fuck off we’re full of rallies!

Also, What’s the deal with beheading dissidents!

All that, and more, on News Weakly.

QUOTE OF THE WEEK

“Yo mama so weak, she calls it appeasement when people recognise Palestine, but negotiation when Trump offers Gaza as a casino franchise.”

SUPPORT THE SHOW

Keep News Weakly independent!

Support Sami at: patreon.com/samishah

Sami Shah is a multi-award-winning comedian, writer, journalist, and broadcaster.

For more: http://thesamishah.com

Theme music "Historic Anticipation" by Paul Mottram

This podcast is written, hosted, and produced by Sami Shah.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.