Is it possible to be so bad at gambling that you accidentally become a genius? The boys are putting that theory to the test in Week 14. After "shitting the bed" on their picks for a month straight, the Winning Parlaiy crew unveils a revolutionary new strategy: The Loser’s Bracket. Since they can’t pick a winner to save their lives, they’ve decided to bet against themselves. It’s reverse psychology, but with actual stakes.

Meanwhile, the prodigal son Fern returns from exile (the podcast bathroom) with a shocking confession: he may have accidentally committed grand larceny at a Walmart self-checkout. Tune in to hear why "a middle-aged white guy with glasses" is apparently invisible to loss prevention, witness a tearful "loving embrace" apology to Brock Purdy, and find out if picking the Jaguars is ever a good idea—even when you’re trying to lose.

Press play before Fern gets extradited to Nashville.